Jin's POV

"Is it really true..? Are you really leaving? Why didn't you tell me? I know we aren't all that close anymore and you are in no way obligated to tell me anything, but... It's just that after the day at the hospital... I.. I don't know... I felt.." I watched Yoona stutter her way through all those questions.

"You felt what?" I asked, hoping that she mirrored my feelings.

"I felt like we... I felt comfortable talking to you, like before. I thought that you felt the same.."

Comfortable?

I made her feel comfortable. A well-worn couch makes people feel comfortable! But I really shouldn't whine about that. At least she's warming up to me.

It had been only two months since Yoona walked back into my life but it was enough for me to remember why I had fallen for her so fast and so hard the first time around.

The days when she wasn't talking to me, it became apparent how the little special spot I had always had for her in my heart wasn't so little after all. Missing her hurt more than any other physical pain I had experienced.

I didn't say anything to the members but they caught on soon enough. Hoseok was the one who finally confronted me.

I had started staying back after dance practice. It wasn't unusual though. I generally stayed back and practiced the choreography on my own because it didn't come to me as easily as it did to the others. But after two weeks of it, I started to show signs of being worn out. I could barely move after practice was done for the day and everyone looked genuinely worried. I just laughed it off as old-age getting to me earlier than expected.

Hoseok stayed back saying that he would help me with my practice. But I was beyond exhausted and couldn't even get off the floor. Hoseok helped me up, waited for me to take a quick shower and then dragged me out for dinner. Under the influence of some really strong alcohol and a really persuasive Hoseok, I blurted out everything that was going on with Yoona. Talking to him made me realize that I had been stupid to disregard how I felt and to chalk it up to nostalgia.

'Comfortable' wasn't the best start but anything other than hate and anger from her was good enough. 

I didn't want to overwhelm her with my feelings but I also wanted to let her know how much she meant to me.

"I have always felt like I could talk to you but my feelings aren't limited to just being comfortable with you." I watched her eyes widening in surprise.

"Jin.."

I took a deep breath, moved closer to where she was sitting on the couch and took both her hands in mine.

"I know I have been all over the place, with my decision about the group and things are a mess when it comes to both of us. Just for this moment, I want to talk about us and nothing else."

When Yoona didn't say anything, I decided to continue before my brain could convince me to stop.

"I was hoping that my note would have done the job but I am not sure if it did. You did get my note right?"

She just nodded and fished it out of her pocket. I shook my head as she held it towards me.I didn't need to read it.

After spending hours spouting cringe-y poetry, the crumpled remains of which could be found in the dustbin under my desk, where they rightfully belonged, I had finally decided to keep it neat and clean and tell her how much she meant to me in the simplest way.

For almost a week I had debated on how to thank her for being there for me at the hospital and finally settled on sending her a mini-cactus because she didn't like receiving flowers only to watch them wither away within a couple of days.

"Yoona, you have this uncanny ability to see right through me. You have always been honest with me and told me things the way it is. With the line of work I am in, I am often told things that I want to hear and not necessarily what I need to hear. Even if I was being genuinely praised, I would immediately write it off as empty compliments. My confidence became nothing but a facade to hide my insecurities."

"After talking to you, for the first time in a long time, I thought that maybe there was some truth in your words because you have nothing to gain by telling me the things you did. I may not completely agree with you because I believe your opinion will invariably be biased towards me but it led me to recognize the fact that I had become too cynical towards the world."

"Somewhere along the way of not letting getting things to my head, I had created a wall around me which didn't let me accept things either. I still don't see the Jin you see but I am more open to the idea that such a Jin could exist. You re-introduced me to myself; to a side whose existence I had failed to acknowledge all these years."

"To put it simply, as I said in the note,

I didn't know myself, until you."

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