REAL LIFE
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cariad and tom's home, london
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—"YOU'RE COVERING IT for him, aren't you?" joshua smiled knowingly as cariad blushed crimson, "that's why you suggested this song."

she pouted momentarily, "maybe. i can't tell him so i might as well let out my feelings in a song. besides, it's my favourite season one song!" she forced a weak laugh as joshua rubbed her shoulder.

they'd planned to film a cover of 'i think i kinda, you know' from the first season of high school musical: the musical: the series, upon cariad's request, and so were sat on her bed with ozzie at their feet and a guitar in josh's hands.

things between the pair of them and tom and alison had been somewhat awkward to begin with, with shy smiles and red cheeks amongst the four of them, but much to their surprise they all got along smoothly once they'd broken the ice.

alison was undeniably lovely, which sort of pissed cariad off, but she couldn't help being awestruck by the way she carried herself. she was so sweet, and cariad was jealous. not only was alison gorgeous, but her personality matched perfectly.

tom got on well with joshua, sharing many a joke with him throughout the day. he had been nervous to meet him, given that harrison had told him cariad had been going to josh for advice, but this was counterbalanced by joshua's nerves.

they got on remarkably well, remarkably fast, though initially tom didn't really want to. he couldn't help that a small part of him hoped josh would be an arsehole so he could warn cariad away from him.

cariad had sternly pulled tom aside whilst haz, ali and josh were engrossed in a conversation, "she's adorable, tom, and so sweet. you have to tell her, or i will. i don't care if she hates me or blames me and thinks i'm just jealous — she deserves to know."

tom had nodded meekly and promised that he would tell her what had happened.

cariad was right — no matter how uncertain he was about his feelings, tom knew that continuing to hide what happened was awful, particularly when alison had shown him nothing but honesty and affection since they'd first started dating. she didn't deserve to be hurt.

and so as cariad and josh sat filming their cover, tom had sat his girlfriend down on his bed, her hands clasped in his, and placed a kiss to her cheek.

"i need to tell you something, love, and be completely honest," he began, noticing the anxious frown etched on his girlfriend's face, "because i can't hide things from you, even if they're going to hurt you."

alison almost knew it was about cariad. she was sure he was about to break up with her and tell her he loved cariad and wanted to be with her, or tell her that he'd just used her to make cariad jealous.

"...g-go on."

"the night we got together i'd gone to see cari before she left for utah, and we— well we kissed," he gulped, alison's face twisting further into a hurt expression, "we established it was a mistake and it hasn't happened since. i don't know why it happened but i really like you, ali, and i'm a piece of shit for hurting you."

"you love her." was all alison could muster at first.

"what?"

she scoffed, "tom, you're in fucking love with cariad, anyone can see it. i was stupid enough to think that wasn't true, but it is. you don't just kiss someone," she shook her head as a tear escaped, trickling down her cheek.

tom was startled, shaking his head and reaching up to cup alison's face with his hands.

"alison— i really do have feelings for you," he bit his lip, "and when i asked you to be my girlfriend, it was because that's what i genuinely wanted."

alison smiled sadly, "it's what you thought you wanted, tom. stop trying to hide how you feel because you're hurting more than just me by playing along with our relationship."

tom kissed her quickly in an act of... desperation perhaps.

"spending time with you has been amazing, ali, and i don't want to lose you," he swallowed hard, their faces still in close proximity, "i've just been confused."

"tom, you love her. you might like me, but you love her."

tom didn't know what to say. she was right — fuck, it hit him now that she was right — but he did genuinely like alison and wanted to give their relationship a try. besides, he knew him and cariad were never going to happen.

"i'm in a relationship with you ali. and if you don't forgive me for what happened i can understand that but — i don't want to lose you completely." he frowned.

alison couldn't help rolling her eyes, "you could've thought of that before kissing her," she mumbled, "i know we've not been together long, but it's still humiliating and i just— i really liked you tom."

"i'm sorry. i never wanted to hurt you, ali, and i really hope that you know that. i do care about you, i really do," tom swallowed hard, heart clenching as he watched her try not to cry.

alison took tom's hand in hers, "i know, tom. i know you're a good person really but— the reality is you've fucked up and as much as i like you, i can't be with you when i'm always gonna be just second best. i can't."

tom didn't know what to say to that. she was right and he knew she wouldn't take him back. he'd fucked up — he'd hurt her and cariad and he couldn't expect to have been forgiven.

he hated that a small part of him wasn't as upset about alison breaking up with him as he should have been.

"look i care about you too, tom, and i know you didn't mean to hurt anyone," ali sighed, "and just because we can't be together, it doesn't mean we can't be friends. just... tell cari how you feel."

tom just nodded shyly for a moment, unable to speak again. how could she be so understanding when he didn't deserve it?

"i'm sorry again, ali, i am. i can't tell you enough how sorry i am."

"i know, tom. look i'm gonna go home, but we can get a coffee and have a proper conversation about this another day, yeah? it's late," alison smiled softly, standing up and collecting her things from the corner of tom's room as tom remained stunned in silence again, "look after yourself... and be honest with cari, for the love of god. you've confirmed that you love her to me, just confirm it to her... yeah?"

"i didn't—"

"then explain why you didn't once deny that you do when i repeatedly said it. you didn't make the best case for someone who didn't want to break up, tom."

and with that, she was out the door.

———
ok so i am having a rlly weird week and rereading this chapter is pissing me off cos i'm not happy with it but can't figure out what i want to change nd idk i'm feeling weird and insecure abt my writing today so apologies if this is shite ❤️ love u all thank u for reading x