The decision has been made and maybe we are sacrificing too much, but this is what we've chosen, what we think we can live with. Maybe it's foolish, maybe we're being just teenagers and we aren't really seeing ahead and planning for a realistic and comfortable future, but right now this is what we feel, what we want.

Many things might change tomorrow. Maybe I have a limited time, whatever amount of years I was supposed to live, and once I fulfil that time I'll cross over whether I want it or not. Maybe James will meet another girl and fall in love with her and will want to have a family with her. Maybe I'll stay with him until he dies and then follow him to wherever we have to go next, because we are supposed to be together. There's so much uncertainty that it does not make much of a difference what we choose at the end, because we don't really know the consequences of those decisions. What matters right now is that we have each other and for once, we are not lonely.

James takes a bit of my pain away every day, and I make him company, to the point a smile is the most natural aspect of his features. I bring happiness and company to his life, he brings love and acceptance to mine. Is it then wrong to stay together if we help each other like this?

Of course, there are many difficulties that come with staying together, especially for him. I'm basically an anchor to Street, a small town with little possibilities. His parents won't provide for him forever, he needs to make his own life and forge his future, but I narrow his options. For as long as I'm bound to college, and he stays with me, he'll be glued to this town.

"Paige!" James screams one morning, running into the room where I have been, organising his wardrobe. I have learnt that organising his hoodie collection in different ways every once in a while is actually really good to kill time and relieve stress.

"What's wrong?" I immediately ask, dropping the red hoodie in my hands and turning to look at him with wide eyes.

"I've got an idea," he says, wide smile on his lips and eyes full of excitement and anticipation. "I was thinking and then I saw it and it hit me!"

"What?" I ask, because I'm not following him. He's like skipping words in all his excitement.

But he doesn't answer, he only grabs my wrist and drags me outside the room and towards the living room. I just follow him, confused and a bit worried, but I don't say anything. We don't stop until we face the shelves where he keeps many films and books, where he's also put the new urn with the remains of my ashes. Since we brought them home it's become easier for me to stay and I naturally feel drawn here when classes end.

"Your ashes!" he points out, as if I hadn't noticed them already. I turn to stare at him, letting him see my concern because it almost seems he lost his mind.

"Are you feeling well?" I question out loud, instinctively, I raise my hand to touch his forehead, as if it to check for a fever, although that's pointless. He's always just warm to me.

"Yes! But Paige, don't you realise? Your ashes are a bound point to you, and contrary to having been buried, you can move your ashes. Like form your home to here. You've felt the difference, right?" I nod. I think I know where he is going with this, but still then I don't interrupt him. "I thought that maybe you can leave town if we take your ashes with you, or maybe you can get a bit farther than just the town limits. What do you think?"

I stay quiet, giving a thought to that idea. It seems like a logic option, and he is right, I have felt the difference of staying here when the ashes were still at home, and then when we brought them with us. It might not work, but I think it's worth giving it a shot.

If... if it worked, then James could leave this place and look for better opportunities out there. And I could go with him, see other places, as well. Maybe I could go to uni with him and learn new things. Maybe we wouldn't need to stay in Street until the end because there's an option.

Excitement begins to bubble inside of me as a wide smile shows up on my face. I'm probably James' reflection right now, looking as thrilled as he is at the new possibility. It almost looks too good to be true.

"We have to try," I blurt out, almost bouncing on my heels. "See how far we can get."

"Indeed we have!" he agrees, grabbing my two hands and squeezing them hard. I chew on my bottom lip, trying so hard not to burst out giggling right now. "Let's take a trip, Paige."

"When can we go?" I immediately ask. If I could have it like I want, then we would be on our way to somewhere, I don't care where. "Now?"

James laughs, that glorious and full of joy kind of laughter that makes one happy with just hearing it.

"I'd like to say yes, but I have college work. Let's go this weekend, what do you think?"

The pout I make can't be stopped, but I do understand we can't go now. I'm just so excited I wish it were different, but even if I'm being childish, James doesn't mind. On the contrary, he just raises our hands until his lips find the back of mine in a gentle, romantic kiss.

Friday is just two days away, I surely can wait that much for our trip. And in the meantime, I do get everything ready. We make plans, deciding to go to London as it's been so long since I went there, probably when I was seven or so. We also decide to take the train because I like it and it seems like a nice option to enjoy the scenery.

In preparations, college work and so much anticipation, Friday comes and we take a bus to Cary that will take us to the train station. James has carried my ashes with him the whole day, in a different, very secure urn. It's creepy, I have to admit it, but we are in a very serious experiment.

I have noticed so far, that when the ashes were in college I felt the strongest I've ever done. It was like I was almost corporeal again, like I wasn't just energy trying really hard to stay there. It was such a weird and powerful thing, and it gave me hopes this would happen.

Maybe we should take my desk with us, I have kept it here for fifteen years, stubbornly bringing it back every time they tried to get rid of it. I technically died there, so maybe if we move that we can also expand the ratio of how far I can get.

In the bus I can barely control myself, I'm bouncing the whole time, talking non-stop. James just smiles and shakes his head, wearing a glove where he is holding my hand even if it isn't cold anymore. Whether he's making a fool of himself, he doesn't mind. He even wears the earbuds with microphone because I insist, otherwise he wouldn't care if people see him talking to the thin air. I just don't want to bring unnecessary attention to him, especially if we're going somewhere away from Street where I have kept all the ghosts away from him.

I get nervous when we approach the next town, paying attention to every part of me to notice the changes. The last time I tried leaving street it was draining me, to the point I fainted. Kind of. So now I'm expecting the same feeling, but it doesn't come. Yes, I do feel like invisible strings pulling me back to college, but it's bearable. It doesn't hurt, it doesn't drain me out. It's just... bothersome.

I actually make it out of Street and to Cary to the train station, and when we get off the bus I can barely contain myself. I actually hug James, making him lose his balance and almost making him fall.

"I made it! I'm outside Street. For the first time in fifteen years!" He hugs me tightly, not minding all the people staring at him like he lost his mind. "It worked."

"I'm so glad it did," he whispers in my ear, hugging me tightly before letting me go. "Shall we continue?"

"Please!" I chirp, holding his hand that the then puts in the front pocket of his hoodie and we go to get on the train.

He bought two tickets, even if that meant waisting money, but that way I could comfortably sit by his side without having to scare or do anything to anyone. Although I do that unconsciously, when he hands me his mobile phone to play and the person near sees a gadget operating on its own.

It turns out, touch screen technology it's really hard. Most of these gadgets work with warmth or like texture and such, so as a ghost, it is almost impossible to make it. But James hands me his mobile for me to practice, even if it means I end up completely exhausted because I've put everything I've got to unlock the screen and launch and app. Depressive, I know. But it's okay, a ghost doesn't need a mobile phone.

After around two hours, we make it to London and I'm like a child in Christmas morning, too excited to be contained. I don't even know where to go first, the fact of being there is already too incredible. I can't believe it's worked out, that we really made it this far. It means I'm not an anchor for James anymore, we've found a loop hole and can work around that.

James is the one that tells me we need to go to the hotel were he'll be staying for the weekend, and where he goes I go with him. He leaves his small bag there and uses that chance to ask for delivery for lunch.

"Now that we know this works," he says when the food has arrived and we're watching telly while he eats. "We could try other farther places in the future. Get to travel like that," he suggest. "We could go to Scotland, or Ireland. Maybe to France next, and other countries."

"Oh my! That would be great! Yes, let's do that!" I exclaim, clapping in excitement. "You need to see what uni you're going to, and what program, and I'll go with you and it'll be so great! We can actually do that. I still can't believe it!" I burst out giggling again.

"I guess it was the right choice after all, we can have more than what we expected," he muses and I nod frantically. "Shall we go sightseeing now?"

That's what we do, leaving the room and only taking the urn with us to see how I react to that. I can totally endure the pull, and having my ashes with us works like a buffer of some sort, reducing the strength of what pulls me back home, and at the same time stabilising me. I do notice I have to concentrate more to stay in one place and not to walk through objects. Also, as London is so very crowded, I have to be very careful not to run through anyone. That would be a tragedy. But all in all, we have a great afternoon, going to those landmarks that make it to every London postcard.

The next day is a bit harder, though. We leave the ashes in the hotel, just to see how that works. At the end, coming on this trip was just to test the limits. And this part of the experiment isn't working out so well. I have a hard time managing to stay in one piece and keep coherent thoughts. I can't control emotions and it seems I'm colder than usual because James can't bear my touch. And as the hours pass, I have trouble even walking. It's like it takes everything in me to make myself stay with him when everything pulls me back home and not being next to my ashes is too hard.

By lunchtime, I can't really carry on. I can't even sit without going through the chair. I can't touch anything because I'm not strong enough, and James doesn't dare to touch me for fear he'll go through me and hurt me enormously.

"Let's go back to the hotel," James says, his expression looking dark and anxious. He's the opposite of what he looked like yesterday. "You're not okay."

"Not yet... it's still early. I can do this," I insist, but even against my own words, I can't do it for much longer. I grow too weak and not even being next to my ashes help. The pull towards college is too strong for me now, I can feel myself slipping and I think that if I close my eyes, I won't open them again.

James is so worried next to me, looking even guilty for even thinking of doing this. And I start feeling depressed, too. I was so happy yesterday, but today all the hopes and dreams crushed. Yes, we can make it out of Street, but not for too long and I grow weak. The bond with my ashes is there, but it isn't as strong as the one I have with the place I died in. And if I put distance between college and I, then I can't really separate from my ashes, which makes it quite uncomfortable. I'm basically glued to the urn if I'm not in Street.

"I'm sorry," I say, when we are back in the hotel. I'm basically hugging the urn, trying to stabilise myself like that, but it isn't enough. I still feel so weak and like I'm fading. Like when I was trying to get away from Street that time and I passed out.

"I'm sorry for suggesting this," he says back. "It wasn't a good idea."

"Don't say that," I protest. "We learnt that I can actually leave Street, and we managed to have this little trip. Let's pretend I just got food poisoning," I try to reassure him somehow, lightly smirking. "Because I just ate too much despite you told me not to, but I'm a child inside."

James chuckles, barely touching my hair to stroke it.

"We'll go back tomorrow morning, okay? You'll be okay," he promises and I nod, knowing it'll be like that and trying to push the sadness and disappointment for this failure to the back of my mind.

I guess we'll have to figure out another way to make things work, this isn't enough. But there must be a way, I have to believe in that at least. It's not like I have anything else but that future with James, so I'm holding on to it with both hands, and I'll keep doing it, until the end.

>>>·<<<

Hello! So... yeah, there was a reason why they went for the ashes and why that was mentioned. Anyhow, the book I think has like four or five chapters left and cue to that, I have added "Crushed", which is the prequel of Unseen. You can add it to your library and wait for the first chapter once this book is finished.

Dedication to BMadden18 I have actually considered the ending you proposed. There are so many options to finish this book ;)

Bel, xx

~updates every Monday~