After nightfall, Jongho dawns a sweater, two coats, a hat, a scarf, a pair of mittens, his best hemp socks, thick trousers, waterproof boots, and a blanket.

By the light of the stars, he leaves the warmth of his hanok and heads out in search of the warmth of his heart.

After making his way through the snowy paths to the library, Jongho stands outside the library window. He stares.

There is a tree inside.

An evergreen strung with candles and trinkets and berries and... popcorn? Where did Yunho get corn from? Jongho shakes his head. He's pretty sure Yunho is just pure magic at this point.

He then sees the man in question.

Through the window, Yunho winds up a long-play music box to sound and sets it on the table beside him. The table covered with cookies and... fruit-stuffed rice balls? Darn.

Jongho can no longer feel his toes, so he slowly walks to the door and knocks. He must make sure Yunho is ready for him to arrive to... whatever this is.

Jongho holds his own basket of fruity rice cakes- made from dried strawberries preserved for the winter- and hopes it's an adequate substitute for the hwangnam.

When Yunho does open the door and usher Jongho inside, the library smells of cinnamon, pine, and vanilla.

Jongho looks around, eyes lingering on every piece of festive decor. "Is this...?"

"Merry Christmas!" Yunho pulls two Santa hats from behind his back and places one on each of their heads.

"Christmas?" The younger asks.

"Yeah." Yunho's smile grows a little anxious at the other's stunned expression. "It's just, when we talked about Christmas last week, you seemed sad you missed it."

Jongho's gaze roams around the library, catching on the boots in front of the fireplace and woven evergreen atop the mantle.

"Is that okay?" Yunho asks, and Jongho's gaze snaps immediately back to the older.

"Yeah," he breathes. "Yes, definitely. It's just... wow." The more Jongho looks around, the more his smile grows. And, if Jongho could see his own eyes, he'd be amazed at the sparkle his irises now hold.

"Oh, um..." Jongho awkwardly holds out his container of sticky treats. "Well, the kids ate all my hwangnam, so I made strawberry rice balls." Jongho glances to the side table of sweets Yunho has set up. "But I see you already have some."

Yunho chuckles and takes the container from Jongho's grip. "Don't worry, those are mango. I'm sure yours are better, anyway," he winks.

"Do you wanna open our stockings?" Yunho asks after setting Jongho's strawberry rice next to the platter of his mango ones.

"Stockings?" Jongho repeats.

"Yeah," Yunho laughs, already helping the younger disrobe from his cocoon of warmth. "The boots. Same thing."

Jongho smiles as the older pulls them both towards the fireplace.

Jongho folds himself into the pillows Yunho has placed by the fire. Yunho does the same and pulls the boots towards them. As he begins to see walnuts and tangerines tumble out, Jongho laughs at the utterly wonderful absurdity of it all.

"What?" Yunho laughs along.

"Nothing." Jongho shakes his head with a blushed smile. Everything.

After opening the, ehem, stockings, the two are cuddled comfortably together and snacking on tangerines. Yunho's back rests against the closest chair and Jongho rests his own back against Yunho's chest. After peeling another tangerine and handing it off to Jongho, Yunho rests his hands around the younger's waist, holding him securely against himself.

Snacking on his fruit, Jongho thinks back to his Christmas pasts. To the clementines he ate then, and how they basically just tasted like water compared to the heavenly tangerines he's eating now. Yet still, how Kyungmin would always beg his hyungs to peel clementine after clementine for him and Eunmin.

He wonders if his family celebrated Christmas this year. A week ago? Two? Jongho isn't sure.

His breath is a deep and heavy sigh from his chest.

"Wanna talk about it?" Yunho asks softly, stroking the younger's jaw.

Jongho melts into his touch, relaxing the clenched muscles of his jaw.

"About what?"

"I don't know," Yunho shrugs. "Whatever just made you sigh like that."

Jongho contemplates the offer.

"My family."

Yunho is quiet for a moment.

"Do you miss them?"

Another sigh.

"I don't know."

"What do you mean?" Yunho asks. Yunho thinks he understands what the other is trying to say, but he's not one to put words in another's mouth.

"I mean, I do miss them, I guess." As Jongho speaks, Yunho can feel the younger tense, retracting from his touch; just a little, but still enough for Yunho to notice. "But... we would always just fight. How can I miss that?"

Yunho doesn't pull the younger back; he waits for Jongho to relax again on his own time. "You can still miss the person. It doesn't mean you want to go back, or that you miss the situation, but you can still miss the people."

Jongho doesn't answer so Yunho leaves the conversation to end as it is.

Free from the scare of vulnerability, Jongho rests again into the older's chest.

"I have something for you," Yunho whispers. Jongho's eyes land on the covered lump across the room, under the tree.

"But then we have to move," Jongho whines.

Yunho smiles, running his hands through the younger's hair. "But aren't you curious?"

Jongho nods, so Yunho gently wiggles his way out from behind Jongho (with no help from the stubborn man), and crawls over to the tree to bring back the wrapped lump of... something.

Settling back behind Jongho, Yunho places the bundle in the younger's lap. "Should I open it now?"

"Mhmm."

Jongho pulls apart the cloth to reveal a tall basket. Then, from within the woven fibers, Jongho pulls out a potted cluster of forget-me-nots. Like the beautiful flowers, the heat in Jongho's chest blooms again. Warm and fuzzy and softer than usual. "Thank you," he whispers.

"You're welcome, little bear." Yunho places his hand over Jongho's on the rim of the colorful mosaic pot, letting their fingers brush the soil. Then he hums. The vibrations travel through their bodies into the plant's roots, and new buds appear across the stems. But Yunho doesn't ask the buds to bloom. "There," Yunho says instead, "just take care of it well, and they'll bloom within a week or two."

Jongho turns his head up to reply but his words are caught once his lips brush Yunho's. Barely there, chapped from the cold yet, somehow, still soft as silk. Gone in a moment. Yunho chuckles as Jongho looks away.

"I thought you said you wouldn't mind?" Yunho teases softly.

"Mind what?" Jongho still won't look at him.

"Hmmm, nothing." Yunho restrains himself from further teasing. New territory, after all, and Yunho doesn't yet know the boundaries.

"Oh, Jongho-ya, I almost forgot. I have something else for you."

"Hmm?" Jongho finally looks up to meet his eyes, but the older is already wriggling out from behind him again. When Yunho takes his place at center stage... "Oh no." Jongho knows exactly what is happening. It's tradition after all.

"Oh yes." The older refutes. "Ready?"

"As I'll ever be."

Yunho grabs the music box from the table, pausing the crank to momentarily stop the sound. Then he begins to sing.

"This is how I feel about you, twilight."

Yunho's voice starts soft but retains its quiet strength. The lyrics are new to Jongho, but this melody is similar to the one he's always heard from Yunho's lips.

"I wanna see that twilight with you."

Jongho doesn't bite back the smile across his face, doesn't stomp down the warm glow in his heart.

"This isn't easy to face yet, this island of the two of us," Yunho continues, his voice so beautifully dripping in sincerity. "It's only a matter of time before you blink."

But no, Jongho doesn't think he'll ever blink: doesn't think he'll ever want to leave this time, this time after twilight together, the island of two in the snow and the darkness.

"I don't want to leave this ecstatic moment. When you are and I are together, infinity multiplies.

I'll be with you till the end of this day."

Before Jongho realizes, the song is on its final lines.

"So this is how I feel about you, twilight. It's like twilight, yeah."

After Yunho's final note, both their eyes are sparkling like the glittering tree and Jongho can't help but double over in joyful laughter, clapping his hands at Yunho's dramatic bows.

"Thank you, thank you!" Yunho announces to the imaginary crowd, "I'll be here all night!"

Yunho settles again next to the younger as they snack on the food Yunho has prepared.

"If you had told me," Jongho says between bites, "I could've done something for you, too."

Yunho shrugs before opening his mouth, "I-"

"Please," Jongho scrunches his eyes shut, holding up his hands against the older, "swallow your food!"

Yunho's eyes go wide at the small outburst before he starts laughing at the disgusted look of the younger. Jongho rolls his eyes, causing Yunho's laughs to turn into a coughing fit. "Aish, Yunho-ya." Jongho pats his back. "Breathe."

After a few more hacked up breaths, Yunho's breath returns. He clears his throat. "As I was saying,"-he side eyes the younger- "just improvise."

"What?"

"Something for me, improvise." Yunho leans back against the pillows and motions for Jongho to stand.

Jongho coughs his way through a blush. "I don't wanna stand."

"Okay," Yunho chuckles, "standing isn't required for improvisation."

Jongho turns to look at the older and, oh, was that a mistake, because Yunho currently displays his -to Jongho- infamous pleading eyes. Just a little larger, a little more round, and way too many flutters of his lashes.

"Aish."

"So is that a yes?" Yunho asks giddily.

Of course it is. How can Jongho deny him? It's becoming dangerous, honestly.

"Ehem..." Jongho racks his brain for something, anything, that will appease Yunho. And preferably not embarrass Jongho. "Just give me a second."

"I can be patient," Yunho laughs.

Jongho takes a deep breath, closing his eyes to begin.

"Without thinking, I fumbled on the way home."

Jongho's voice is soft, unsure. He recalls his memories to mind from months ago, from the path back to the city, accompanied by the very man he now sings to.

"I thought back to that day, when I saw you smiling brightly."

Still, Jongho doesn't dare open his eyes. But with each breath, his confidence grows and his voice becomes full-bodied.

"These feelings, these words, are on the tip of my tongue so I borrow this song to speak them."

Without thought, just feeling the weight of his lyrics, the vibrations of his voice, Jongho sings into the dim light of the library, into the bright light of Yunho's eyes.

"You're my everything.

I'll tell you that you are the whole reason for my life."

Jongho finally lets his eyes meet Yunho's. Yunho's own eyes are glassy and lips parted in stunned awe.

For a moment, Jongho wonders if he's said too much, read too much into their time and touches and words. But the more he gazes into Yunho's eyes, the more he knows there is no going back.

"I'll never forget you, even for a moment, so I'll give this song to you."

For the last line, Jongho's voice dims back to a quiet sincerity. Almost a whisper.

"You are my everything."

After the final note dies, all that's left between them is their breath.

"You..." Yunho starts, still in visible awe. "You can sing."

"I haven't since I was a kid," Jongho replies with a shrug. "I loved to sing at dinner, but Eomma told me not to. So I stopped." Jongho's smile is bittersweet. "No one's ever asked me to sing."

"I'll probably be asking you to sing everyday now."

Jongho giggles. "You might get tired of it."

"No, I don't think I ever could."

It's quiet again as the two soul-gaze. Jongho blushes, the first to look away with a short cough.

"Come on," he suggests, "let's try all the yummy food you made."

- • -

Late into the night, after the candles have burned down and the plates have been cleared and the music box has long ceased its song, Yunho hauls in logs from the shed to keep the fire well-fed through the cold night.

While Yunho works, Jongho heads to the small kitchenette a library side-room holds to prepare some warm and sweet tea.

The tea is set to brew just as Yunho returns with arms full of logs and toes off his winter boots. Jongho moves to help and they both stole the fire. Accidental touches and lingering looks and soft giggles that they have a silent agreement not to mention.

A while later, Yunho sips down the last of his chamomile. Jongho lays on the pillows close to him. "Jongho-ya," Yunho asks as he sets down his mug, "you remember our conversation in the greenhouse a few weeks ago?"

Of course. I forget nothing about you. "Yeah."

"About how you used to dance."

Jongho is quiet for a moment. "Yeah?"

"Why did you stop?"

The memories aren't necessarily unpleasant, not anymore, yet they're still not ones Jongho is keen to recall. "I donno. I grew up. No one was mean about it I guess, but I knew boys didn't dance." Jongho says nonchalant.

"Oh." Is all Yunho says at first. He's trying to think this through. "Do you still feel like that? Like boys don't dance?"

"Nah." Jongho smiles halfheartedly. "I know boys can do girl stuff and girls can do boy stuff and whatever, but I think it's more looked down on when boys play with dolls than when girls play with trucks. But mostly, I just didn't like being different. I wanted to be the same. We were supposed to be the same."

"Did you like being the same?"

"Not at all." The reply comes from Jongho much faster than either of them expected. "It was like a cage in my mind. I felt like everything I thought was somehow controlled. It was scary. I didn't know what was me and what was just what I'd been told or seen."

They sit in silence again. Jongho notices just a sliver of moon through the high windows, how the moonlit glow shines dimly in. The twinkling stars remind him of something far away.

"Yunho-ya, dance with me."

Yunho looks surprised at the request. At the greenhouses, Jongho's words could've been played off as delirious with sleep. Now, even in the small hours, they are both very much awake.

"I- I wanted to ask you but..." Yunho looks up at Jongho as the younger stands. "I wasn't-"

"Come on Hyung." Jongho holds out his hand. It's reminiscent of those times almost half a year ago, when the two met.

Yunho smiles and reaches for the younger's hand. Jongho pulls him up with a little too much force and they laugh freely as the stumble back together. Soon, Jongho rests into Yunho's featherlight hold. "We don't have music; will you sing for us?" Yunho asks with a wink.

"Ha. No."

With a teasing huff, Yunho moves away to pull a new music box from the shelf. He cranks it and soon notes akin to a Joseon lute fill the library.

"Uh, Yunho." Jongho says once the two come together again in the form of a simple waltz. "I never did partner dancing."

"It's not hard,"Yunho assures. "Just mirror me and watch your feet. We'll go slow."

So they do. At first, when Jongho messes up a step or trips over his own feet, he's quick to mutter under his breath how annoyed he is with this whole idea. But when Yunho notices, he pokes the younger's side and, after the music box has been rewound for the second time, Jongho learns that mistakes are inevitable and he's finally getting the hang of things.

By the end, Jongho is pretty sure he's stepped on the older's feet about twelve times. Even though they're barefoot, Jongho thinks it must pinch, but Yunho doesn't mention it.

Now, maybe they are really delirious with sleep because, as the song ends for the last time, Jongho falls forward right into Yunho's chest with a giggle. With arms wrapped around each other, Yunho drags Jongho- who has now refused to use his feet- back to their nest, huffing as they collapse into the bedding.

"That was fun." With his eyes closed, Jongho stays on Yunho's chest. The taller makes no move to protest.

"We should probably sleep now. Otherwise we'll be up till sunrise."

"I used to do that, stay up through two days on end," Jongho mumbles into the older's chest. "I'm pretty sure I was avoiding something- I don't remember what. Or maybe I was just punishing myself."

Jongho feels as Yunho's hands start to run up and down his back. It reminds him of Mama when we was very young.

"Why would you punish yourself?" Yunho asks.

"I don't know," Jongho chuckles tiredly and rolls off Yunho's chest. "I guess I felt guilty."

"For what?"

"I don't think I ever really knew."

Jongho is silent then, and Yunho doesn't push the topic.

Yunho thinks they might finally be going to be-

"Mphf~ I don't wanna sleep yet~" Jongho whines, wiggling closer to the older's side.

"Okayyyy~" Yunho good-naturedly mocks with an exaggerated whine. "Then what do you wanna do?"

"Talk."

"About?" Yunho prods.

"I don't know. What's a good memory you have?"

"Dancing with you." Jongho can hear the grin in his reply. He rolls his eyes.

"What about from when you were little? The first one that comes to mind."

"Hmm..." Yunho contemplates. "Well the first thing I thought of is when Seonghwa's family moved here. I think I was seven or eight? Anyway, it's not often new kids turn up out of the blue so we were all really excited. I remember Minjae and I spent the whole day beforehand making garlands." Yunho laughs fondly at the memory and Jongho can't help but smile. "Seonghwa was so shy but Siyeon played with us right away. That night all our parents let us stay up together and some of the older kids made us a bonfire."

"Woah, that..." Jongho exhales. Sometimes he forgets how different their lives are. In a way, how different their realities are; night and day. "That sounds awesome."

"It was. What about you?" Yunho reverses the question. "What's a happy memory of yours?"

"Well, uh." Jongho feels suddenly embarrassed by what comes quickly to mind. Not even to Yunho, but embarrassed to himself. "It's kinda sad, honestly, looking back."

"Your happy memory is sad?"

"Not at the time. I was really excited then. Anyway, it's so simple, not like yours."

"That's okay." Yunho starts to rub his back again.

"So my eomma was never around much, and when she was, she wasn't the parent you went to with troubles or when you were sad or anything. That was Mama. But when we were sick, Eomma's whole attitude changed." Jongho smiles, suddenly feeling warm thinking of those pockets of love.

"Especially when we had stomach aches, she rubbed our tummies in a certain way. An English phrase." Jongho reaches his hand over to Yunho's abdomen and traces the pattern. "I," he traces the stem of the letter first, then the horizontal lines. "Love," he traces a heart. "You," just the single letter; starting up by his ribs, curving around his lower belly and coming back up.

"That sounds really comforting." Yunho's voice is soft with sleep and sympathy.

"It was."

They lay again in quiet. Jongho listens to the shifting of the logs and crackle of the fire, the occasional strong wind shaking the trees outside.

Yunho pulls him closer. His head flush against Yunho's heart. And Jongho's own heart glows at the gesture. He buries his face into the older's chest and sighs deeply as Yunho holds him close.

"Yunho-ya-" Jongho tilts his head up and his voice becomes fully caught up and knotted in his throat. The two are eye to eye and nose to nose. The glow in Jongho's heart grows into heat.

"Yes, little bear?"

Jongho's forgotten what he meant to say.

A different kind of feeling than usual; not simply warmth or fuzziness or happiness but a full-bodied heat spreading from his heart to encase his whole chest.

It scares Jongho, just a little, because what if he is burned? What if it turns to flames and everything in its path is- Jongho catches himself. He calms the panic in his mind, the panic that dares invade his heart.

"Yunho." He breathes. Jongho pushes up onto his elbows. Since there is barely a moon tonight, as he watches Yunho's eyes, Jongho can barely see anything but a sparkle. A fleck of light that Jongho knows his own eyes have begun to adopt.

Not only in his heart but Jongho feels that the space between them has taken on a different air. Thicker and tighter and somehow more tender.

Now, along with his chest, Jongho's face is warmed by Yunho's breath.

"Jongho," Yunho whispers, "you're still healing. Mentally, emotionally. Don't let me distract you..." But Yunho is not even looking to the other's eyes; instead, his gaze is lower. Lowered to pretty lips - the lips that spout so many beautiful thoughts.

Yunho's eyes flick back up. Caught in the dark honey of Jongho's gaze. A gaze unlike what Yunho has ever seen before, not from Jongho at least. Something so unguarded, something so blatantly wanting and pulling and strong.

"Yunho." Jongho whispers again.

That's the last straw before Yunho leans in. That lava in Jongho's core, oh how it overflows. So whole and warm, just for a moment, as Yunho's lips barely press against his.

Yunho pulls back, just enough to see into Jongho's eyes, unsure, hopeful. "Is-"

He stops speaking, breath caught, as Jongho leans forward, barely brushing their lips, holding himself back. Somewhere in his mind, Jongho thinks he should probably let Yunho finish speaking. But now, Yunho is distracted; he doesn't bother finishing his sentence - barely remembers it.

After a too-long moment, Jongho closes the distance again.

Softly dancing, connecting and breaking, Yunho lets the younger lead for a short while - just to see, just to make sure - but soon Yunho's lips take over for Jongho's inexperienced ones.

Hands pull the other closer. Hands on cheeks and in hair and softly running up and down on sides.

There are no fireworks, no blooming fields or larger sparks of ignited fire. To Jongho, when he moves his lips against Yunho's, there is a grand peace. A deep breath of silence. A restful soul.

•

3.8k words. 2-12-24

A/N: this chapter is so long goodness x_x

I was really happy with the beginning of the dance scene! Jongho holds out his hand to Yunho just as Yunho used to do back when they first met.

I wrote the kiss scene months ago but now I finally feel like they're ready.

I wanted to get to the first kiss before (possibly) taking a break from this book in order to work on Stardust. I have a lot more planned for Unnecessary Enchantment and am considering a second book of sorts: Hongjoong's and Seonghwa's stories in this same au.

If you want me to work on another chapter here, pls comment and I will. If not, I'll likely focus on Stardust for now.