After our last meal in Infernis, my entire family accompanies Jace and me to the portal. My brothers and their partners spend more time saying goodbye to him than they do me. They've created little inside jokes with Jace, and him and Grub even made up a handshake that ends with them licking what I believe symbolizes an ice cream cone for Jace and a certain part of my brother's anatomy for Grub. And all of them say they can't wait until he is here for good.

I've just helped my family fall in love with the man that will never be my partner.

Father moves in beside me and wraps an arm around my shoulder and lowers his voice, saying, "I'm surprised that you found such a perfect fit so quickly, Desideria. I must admit that I had my doubts when you left about you finding a human to take as a partner. I'm proud of you."

My heart sinks to the pit of my stomach and I have never felt so guilty in my life. "Thank you," I murmur, leaning into my dad's embrace and hugging him around the waist. "But Dad, he hasn't agreed yet, so don't—"

He waves me off. "Yeah, yeah, it's only a matter of time, though. I can see it in his eyes. He loves this place almost as much as he loves you."

My heart leaps back from my stomach all the way into my throat.

Jace could never love me. Jace doesn't believe in love. We're friends—maybe even best friends—but Jace will never let himself love anyone again.

That thought makes me sad. I push it away to finish up the show for my family.

"Desi, come on, the medium is ready for us," Jace calls, holding out his hand to me.

"All right, I'm coming," I say, turning back toward my parents and wrapping my mom in a hug before addressing everyone. "I love you guys, and I'll see you soon, okay? Thank you for being so kind to him."

Avaros and Lux exchange wicked grins. "That fine specimen of human better return with you."

I roll my eyes and wave over my shoulder. "Okay, on that note...bye!"

I take Jace's hand and intertwine our fingers, and after going through the motions with the medium, we step into the portal.

"You ready to go back to reality?" I ask, giving his hand a squeeze.

"Yeah, it's time. My stomach isn't feeling well and I'm starting to feel lightheaded. I guess my two days in hell are officially up."

"Oh, shit," I say, placing my palm on his forehead and checking for a fever. I let out a relieved sigh when I find his forehead a normal temperature. "Okay, no fever, you're fine. You'll be good as soon as we get back to the human realm. Close your eyes, I think we are about to—"

And with that, we are off, and within a few moments, we are back in the broom closet in the bus station, being greeted by the gum-chewing blonde.

Jace still looks a little woozy when we reach the BMW, so I pull a bottle out of my purse and shake a pill out of it.

"Here, take this," I say, handing him the pill and a bottle of water.

"What is it?"

"Devil's claw root. It's only found in the human realm, but it's the only thing we've ever found that helps the humans when they've stayed a little too long in Infernis. It'll help the nausea. I grabbed some before we left just in case this happened."

He nods and swallows the pill before helping me load our suitcases into the back. He hands me the keys and I drive us home. My stomach performs anxious somersaults the entire way and my brain buzzes with thousands of thoughts. I think about my family's reaction to Jace, the responsibility of my Circle, but mostly, I think about the man next to me. Jace's hands rest on his stomach, his eyes closed, and soft snores drift through his lips. I wonder how things will change between us now that he knows everything about me, where I come from...and what happened between us in the lust exhibit.

It was an effect of the art; it played on the tension that had been building between us. But would it change our dynamic? Would it make things feel awkward around the house? I hope not.

Jace carries in our bags and kicks the door shut behind us. The sheen of sweat is gone from his skin, and it has returned to its beautiful tan tone. He doesn't wait for me, taking the steps two at a time and heading for my room. I walk in as he is lowering my bag to the bed. Keeping some distance, I wrap my arms around my stomach and watch as he heads for the door. My heart sinks and I fight back the sting in my eyes. Everything is awkward. We've crossed a line we shouldn't have and now he can't even look at me.

He stops in the threshold and glances at me over his shoulder. "Thank you, Desi. I'm honored that you trusted me with such an important secret and that you let me help you with your family."

It surprises me enough that a tear I'd been trying to hold back nearly slips down my cheek. I wipe at my eye and step toward him. "No, Jace. I should be thanking you. You trusted me with your life, something you've come close to losing in the past, and I can't put into words what that means to me."

He drops his bag and turns to face me. Leaning against the doorframe, he cocks a brow and says, "I should thank you. You let me bring you to an orgasm in the same room as a demon artist. Once in a lifetime experience."

And there it is. That playfulness and humor he shows when he lets his guard down. I was so close to thinking I'd never see it again, that we ruined what we built with one moment of uncontrollable passion.

I cover my face with my palms and laugh, sinking down onto the mattress. "I mean, fuck, there was no way I was getting out of that room without having an orgasm. I was just glad you were the one to give it to me. It was by far the best one I've ever had."

His gaze darts to my bedside table and the drawer in the top. "I'd hate to think I've put some expensive toys out of business."

I clench my thighs together and my face heats. "Even my clit sucking toy has nothing on you, Jace Wilder."

He blushes. Fucking blushes! He rubs the back of his neck to hide the pink coloring of his face. "And with my newly inflated ego, I apologize for clearly putting a favorite device to shame, and wish you goodnight, Desideria."

I smirk and bite my bottom lip before nodding in his direction. "Goodnight, Jace. See you in the morning."

*****

I contain the giddy laughter that bubbles in my chest as I enter the house. Jace and I finished another Star Wars movie, completing his favorite three. To celebrate the occasion, I ordered him a gift. Not to mention that Jace has been stressing out since we returned home. He jumped back into his proposal for the guy Matt wants him to hire. Late nights and early mornings have ruled his life, and every minute between is spent behind a computer screen. He carved out two hours last night for us to finish another movie, and I'm excited to offer him another small reprieve.

I fumble with Jace's gift as I shut the door and maneuver the through the entry. It is long, awkward, and bound to bring a chaotic joy to his day. I step into the great room and find him sitting at the counter with a bowl of cereal, his laptop, and his glasses sitting high on his nose.

He glances at me from the corner of his eye and mumbles, "Another busy day at the mall, I see. That has got to be the strangest pair of shoes you've ever bought."

"Although I looked at several pairs of shoes today, this isn't for me." I place the box wrapped in black wrapping paper in front of him. It stretches out before him from one side of the kitchen island to the other.

He picks it up and shakes the box. "This is normally where I would make some ridiculous guess about what you bought me, but I'm at a loss."

"I guess you will just have to open it then."

His attention splits between ripping the paper and watching me. He looks hesitant, like I've wrapped a boa constrictor in a box and handed it to him with the hopes that it will curl around his body and put him out of his misery. The non-descript box comes into view, and he pries open one end. He looks inside and just as quickly closes the flap.

"No way," he says with wide eyes.

"Yes way. Take them out."

Jace opens the box again and removes two lightsabers. He hits the button on one and it lights up with deep, electric whine. The red light reflects off the steel kitchen appliances. "Holy fuck."

"The other one is Luke's," I say.

He turns it on the other lightsaber and jumps to his feet. "Desi, these had to cost a fortune."

I shrug one shoulder. "Eh, my dad has no real concept of how much the human dollar actually is, and he's given me way too much as an allowance. I suppose I could have told him, but instead I decided to spend some of it on my best friend. Dad has been saving his fortune for like, eight centuries now, so I think he can spare it."

Jace hands me Darth Vader's lightsaber and he takes Luke's in his other hand. "All right, I recall having a lightsaber fight once in this very room, and you had no idea what the hell was going on. And now, not only do you know what's going on, you've bought me my very own weapon. It's time for a duel."

I grin and back up toward the other side of the kitchen with the lightsaber in hand. "Join me and together we can rule the galaxy."

"Never." Jace swings and the glowing green light streaks before him with a sound that matches.

We spar and every time we hold our weapons together, they crackle with electricity. Our duel leads us around the kitchen and into the living room. Like children, we stand on the couch and jump off, bring our lightsabers together again. I make a move to land my blade across his stomach, but Jace spins out of my way. The determined gleam in his eyes tell me that he will not let the Dark Side win.

I move around the coffee table, hoping to gain some of the space I lost. Jace bolts the other way and grabs my wrist. My lightsaber ends up on the floor and my arm behind me. He pulls my back to his chest and holds the lime light to my throat.

"Surrender," he says against my ear.

My stomach clenches, my skin prickling with the awareness of how close he's pulled me against him. I don't think he intended to make this moment sexual, but I've gone from playful to horny in five seconds flat.

"I will if you will," I whisper, all thoughts of the duel out of my brain. I'm thinking with a different body part now.

He holds my wrist a little firmer and pushes the blade against my skin. "You give in so easily to me. If only you knew the depraved things I want to do to you, princess."

I'm not sure how he turned the tables. He was the good guy, and I was the bad. Now, I'm not so sure. I shouldn't let my mind run away with this thought. I shouldn't picture the wicked things he wants to do to me. But the husky sound of his voice won't allow me to ignore them.

Even though I know I shouldn't, even though I know it's going against everything we agreed on before we left Infernis, I push it just a little further.

"I can only imagine," I say, bumping my ass against him to see if he's as turned on as I am. Of course, he is, and my panties are immediately soaked at the feeling of his erection pressed to me. "But even better? I'd like to feel them."

His grip on me wavers, and he takes a step back. I fear facing him, afraid that I've taken things too far. But Jace flashes me a smirk and replies, "Too bad I'm not prone to fraternizing with those who are on the wrong side of the force. No matter how stunning they are."

Relief washes over me and I stoop to pick up my lightsaber, switching it off and setting it on the island. "Okay, what about now? I'm no longer on the wrong side," I say, holding up one hand in surrender and placing the other on my hip. "Now I'm just stunning." I lift one side of my lips in a grin that I hope tells him I'm teasing.

"I should reward you for coming to the right side of the Force, but seeing you wield a lightsaber was really sexy. I know, let me make you dinner. Fettuccini alfredo?"

I can't argue with that. "Sounds perfect, Skywalker. Don't let your guard down, though. I might switch sides at any moment. You have to keep your eye on me."

His laughter fills the kitchen as he moves to get the pots from the cupboard. "Keep swaying your ass like that when you walk, and I'll have no problem keeping an eye on you."

I raise an eyebrow and stroll past him, swatting him on the ass. "I'm built a certain way, so I can't help the way I move, but I will admit...I sway my ass a little extra when you're around."

"What a coincidence. I shake my ass more when you're around too. Tell me my efforts haven't gone unnoticed." He grabs the firm globes of his rear and looks over his shoulder. "I've worked hard for these buns of steel. I want to know someone in this house appreciates them."

I giggle and take a handful in my palm and squeeze. "Fuck, you aren't kidding. You've got an ass to die for. I absolutely appreciate your efforts and your rear end. And don't worry; I notice when you shake your ass. You do it when you pour your peanut butter puffs. It's like you're dancing out your bad attitude because you know your cereal is coming."

Jace pulls the ingredients out of the refrigerator and shakes his ass. "I'm getting ready to put twenty cups of sugar straight into my veins, of course I'm happy when I'm making my cereal."

"Fair enough. Do you need any help?"

"Nope. I told you; I'm doing this for you. Go sit on the couch and relax while I do all the cooking," he says, and the sloth in me has no problem obliging.

I'm lounging on the couch, my pajama shorts rolled up a little too far to be considered decent, my tank top dipping low in the front, and my hair falling wildly over my shoulders when Cannon comes strolling in from work.

"Good evening, roommates," he greets us, lifting his chin as he enters the kitchen. "Jace, are you making alfredo again?"

"We've got to keep our princess happy. Besides, check out what she bought me." He tips his chin toward the counter. "I'll be making her dinner for the next year."

Cannon picks up one of the toys and whistles. "What did you do to get this?"

"Apparently she has a thing for shaking your ass."

Jace flashes me a cheeky grin, and Cannon gives me a surprised raise of his brow and asks, "What the fuck were you two up to while I was gone?"

"Nothing really. It was like a trip to hell without you here," Jace answers.

I clap my hand over my mouth, smothering a giggle. The way he talks about my home realm is so tongue in cheek, but I don't miss the adoration in his eyes. He enjoyed his time with my people and my family. A week ago, he asked me to explain my family line and where the human legends of my people came from. In exchange, he told me about his career and his rise to becoming a business owner. The give and take of our conversations have become one of my favorite things. Besides giving his ass a little squeeze.

Cannon comes over to the living room and flings himself in the chair across from me. "You look beautiful as always, Desi. I missed you the last week," he says, sitting forward and propping his elbows on his knees. "Let me take you out this weekend."

My stomach somersaults and the idea of saying yes to Cannon in front of Jace makes me want to throw up. Why? I don't know. Jace is the one who told me to give Cannon a chance.

I glance at Jace, and he's busying himself with the sauce. But he must feel me looking at him because he meets my gaze, pushing me forward with a nod.

I chew the inside of my cheek and look into Cannon's eyes. "All right. That sounds good," I say, flashing him a smile. "Where to?"

"I got tickets to a concert at the old theater downtown. There is an orchestra playing popular music from movies. I thought we could grab dinner at a nearby restaurant before we go."

"That'll be fun," I say, sitting up and pushing my hair out of my face. "I'm going to go change before dinner." When I pass Cannon, he reaches up and squeezes my hand.

"I really did miss you," he says, glancing up at me, his blue eyes running up and down my body, making me shiver.

"Same," I say, returning the squeeze and slipping my hand out of his before jogging up the stairs to my room.

I strip off my pajamas, pulling a low-cut purple maxi dress over my head. I pull half of my curls into a bun on top of my head and leave the rest loose around my shoulders and apply some mascara and lip gloss.

Before I go back downstairs, I think about the conversation I had with Jace in Infernis. Maybe there aren't sparks with Cannon yet, but I do like him. I have fun with him, he's a good guy, and I want to keep getting to know him. Not just on dates where he spoils me with some extravagant dinners, either. I'm interested in him here at home too when no one else is looking.

I walk back downstairs, and Cannon isn't in the living room anymore. I go into the kitchen and lean against the counter. "You sure you don't need any help, Jace?"

He takes me in and spares himself a look. His joggers sit low on his waist and his shirt with human evolution ending in a robot clings to his chest and biceps. He brushes his fingers through his messy hair and says, "I'm suddenly feeling underdressed for a dinner at home. Am I missing something?"

My cheeks flush and I shake my head. "No, I haven't really gotten dressed since we got back from Infernis and I was feeling sort of slobby. Just wanted to put on some real clothes and feel like a human," I lie, avoiding his curious gaze.

He smiles and turns his attention to stirring the sauce on the stove. "A human who is going to wash the dishes by hand tonight?"

"Ha, hell no, never. Just make sure you distract Cannon after dinner so I can get it done the easy way," I say, bumping him with my hip as I walk by and tickle his ribs.

"If you wanted me to distract him, you shouldn't have put on that dress. He already walked out of here with the biggest smile after you agreed to go to that concert with him. The man is going to combust."

I roll my eyes and turn away from him, reaching up into the cabinet to get out three plates. "I'm not all that great, not worth spontaneously combusting over or anything."

Jace slides past me, his front to my back as he moves toward the refrigerator. His breath warms the shell of my ear when he says, "Did I say combust? I meant erupt. I'm sure he is doing just that in the shower right now."

An image of Jace sitting in his office with his cock in his hand plays in my mind, and my face heats.

"Looks like you enjoy that idea, little hurricane." He leaves me and opens the freezer.

I want to correct him, but of course, I don't. Instead, I say, "I have to admit the idea of someone pleasuring themselves to thoughts of me is flattering."

"Trust me, Cannon isn't the first and he won't be the last."

The way he says it sounds like personal experience. I can't help but take a step toward him and whisper, "And how do you know that?"

"It's my manly intuition, and let's face it, every dude has jerked off to the thought of someone they find attractive. Hot girl equals hand on our dick."

"Nice," I say, shaking my head. I clear my throat. "What about you? Have you ever...thought of me?" I can't believe I'm asking him this, but for some reason I just can't stop the words from flowing out of my mouth. 

"While I jerked off?"

"Yeah."

"I—"

Footsteps pound down the stairs, and Cannon says, "Man, I understand why you work from home and wear basically pajamas all day. It feels damn good to be out of dress pants."

He enters the kitchen in a pair of sweats and white t-shirt. The tiny black twists around his head glint with water, and his blue eyes look exceptionally bright against his brown skin. The smile on his full lips reminds me why it is so easy to enjoy his company. He walks up to Jace, and they do some complex handshake that consists of several smacking sounds.

"I'm telling you. You should talk to your boss. We could order lunch from Uber Eats and catch up on some games," Jace says.

"Nah man, there are too many distractions here." Cannon's sky-blue gaze falls on me and he winks.

I raise an eyebrow and grin. "You like the dress?" I ask, holding out my arms to my sides. "It's new; I haven't even worn it before now."

"You could wear a garbage bag and I'd think you look amazing. Did you put that on for me?"

I have a mini debate in my head. Do I play coy and pretend I didn't? Or do I own up to it and let him know without a doubt that I'm interested in him? I don't have long to decide.

"What if I did?" I ask, dropping my voice and stepping toward him, crossing my arms over my chest.  "Would you like that?"

"You know I would, Desi."

Jace clears his throat, and I glance over at him. He rubs the back of his neck and looks around the kitchen like he can't remember what he's doing in here. "I'll be back. Desi, can you keep an eye on the sauce for me?"

I nod and he hurries out of the room.

"Cooking all that cheese is getting to him," Cannon says with a chuckle.

I laugh but I don't feel any humor. Jace took off too quickly and his stiff shoulders and fidgeting hands tell me he was uncomfortable. But why? Jace is the one who has pushed me toward Cannon over and over again. He's the one who said I didn't need to give up on him because of one kiss. He can't be upset that Cannon and I share playful moments. Especially when Cannon has shown interest in me as more than a friend and doesn't have a massive block against commitment.

The more I think about it, the more irritated it makes me. Jace doesn't want me, but he doesn't want Cannon to have me? Not cool. I push away the guilt and turn my attention back to Cannon.

"Back to what we were talking about," I say, glancing up and down his frame with a suggestive smirk on my lips. "Did you put these gray sweats on for me?"

Cannon moves in behind me and wraps his arms around my waist. He places a sweet kiss on the back of my neck and says, "I didn't know you had a thing for gray sweatpants. But now that I do, I'm glad I put them on."

I smile and look over my shoulder at him. "You can wear gray sweats for me any day of the week, sir." Maybe I'm feeling brave because I know he's into me, and I really like being around him. So I place my hands over his and murmur, "Why don't you come to my room after dinner tonight?"

The sound of rattling keys has Cannon and me spinning around. Jace rushes past and from the entry says, "If the sauce is thick enough, you can throw the noodles in it. They should be done." He grunts like he is fighting to slam his feet in his shoes. "The pie I pulled out of the freezer will take some time to thaw but feel free to dig in once it has. I'll catch you two in the morning." He doesn't give us a chance to respond before the door slams shut.

Jace didn't even have his jacket and it is freezing outside. The realization hits me hard. He didn't intend on leaving until he walked in on my conversation with Cannon. I'm a slew of fucked up emotions. I'm mad at Jace for acting the way he is. I'm pissed that he would encourage me to go for Cannon if he is going to have a problem with it. I'm enraged that he would be upset when he has zero intention of being anything more than my friend. For a man who always comes off like he knows exactly what he wants, he sure seems confused.

But I'm also upset that I seem to have really hurt his feelings.

"What the fuck was that about?" Cannon asks, looking back at me with confusion written all over his face.

"Who knows?" I say with a shrug. "But you know what? We're alone now, and suddenly I'm not hungry anymore." Pulling Cannon against me, I cup his cheeks in my hands and look up at him. "Come to my room now?"

Cannon looks back at the front of the house. "Did I miss something? Did you and Jace—"

"No, I mean, well, kind of, but it wasn't se—"

He puts his index finger against my lips. "You don't have to justify anything to me, Desi. It's all right if you did. I told you that I want you to have the full experience before you have to make any choices. You are free to date Jace or anyone else for that matter."

"I know and I appreciate that. You've been really cool about all of this, but Jace and I are not a thing."

He studies me and a line forms between his brow. "But do you want to be a thing with him?"

I press my lips together and look at the wall over Cannon's shoulder before meeting his eyes. "It doesn't matter what I want. He's never going to commit to a relationship again in his life. So no, it isn't. I want to be with someone who wants me. And I'm not telling you I want to put labels on you and me; I know I still need to make sure I experience things, but tonight, right now...I want to be close to you."

Cannon reaches around me, turns off the stove, and grabs my hand. "Then come be close to me."

We walk upstairs and Cannon leads me to his room. Much like my temporary quarters, his is lacking personal touches. The suit he wore today is thrown on his unmade bed and his small walk-in closet is open. A glass sits on the nightstand half full of a watered-down juice. His space isn't a complete disaster, but it is a far cry from Jace's pristine bedroom.

Cannon pulls me in his arms and brings his lips down on mine. The kiss is soft, sweet, and void of the fiery passion I so badly want to feel. But it feels good and is enough to distract me from Jace's quick departure.

I part my lips and run my tongue along the seam of his mouth, and he opens to me. His hands tighten on my hips, and he draws me even closer. I push him back gently, and he sits down on the bed, but doesn't break our kiss. I pull my dress up and straddle him, one knee on either side of him on the mattress. Cradling his face in my hands, I deepen the kiss, wanting so badly to feel just one flame lick the center of my core.

Cannon's hands slide up the outside of my thighs and disappear under my dress. He grips my waist and presses me down on the hard length of him. The soft material of his sweatpants caresses my inner thighs as he rocks me over him. I grab his shoulders to set a faster pace. Everything he does is so calm, but I want to run, to get lost, not meander out of my thoughts.

I know what I want. I want him to take control. Like J—

Stopping that train of thought before it ever leaves the station, I roll off of him and onto my back, pulling him on top of me. "I want you in control," I whisper, meeting his surprised gaze.

"Okay. I can give you that."

My dress slides up my legs at the direction of Cannon's hand. He spends a moment touching me, letting his fingers dip between my legs, but never giving me the contact I need. Each stroke of my skin is unsure, even hesitant, like he is afraid to break me. Little does he know that I want him to.

He guides my legs apart, draping one over his hip. As his lips leave a trail of kisses across my collar bone, he slides my panties to the side. With a featherlight touch, he circles my center. I lift my hips into his touch, but he continues to rub me in the same tender way. And it's driving me crazy.

The stroke of his fingers feels nice, but it isn't enough to turn me on. I could have asked him for a back rub and received just as much pleasure. I need him to speed up, push harder, to listen to my body language.

I decide to use my words, tell him what I want. "Harder, Cannon," I gasp, lifting my hips again, desperate for him to push against my clit. "Please."

Gripping his braids between my fingers, I tug firmly as I crash my lips to his, hoping the intensity of my kiss will indicate the kind of touch I need from him.

It works. He pushes harder but the movement is clumsy. I'm questioning if he is just as inexperienced as me. He is so handsome and driven, and I can't believe that this is new to him. Perhaps we are not on the same wavelength. He wants to be gentle with me to tenderly take care of my needs, and I want something gritty and raw.

Our difference in how to navigate this moment is what brings me to a decision I know will regret for a long time to come.

I moan into his mouth and gasp, "Yes, that's it."

It is in fact not it. But of course, he keeps doing what he's doing, which is exactly not what I need, and it is doing nothing for me.

But I keep up the show, and after an acceptable amount of time has passed, I let out one more moan and with a high-pitched voice straight from a porno, tell him I'm coming. I pretend to ride out the high and sag into the mattress. Using discretion, I ease down my dress and wait for the guilt to set in.

Cannon gathers me into his arms and tucks my head under his chin. "Do you feel better now?"

And here it comes, my stomach turns and the lie I'm about to speak grows thick in my throat. "Much. Thank you."

It's always best to keep untruths short and sweet. Not because he'd be less likely to learn the truth, but because the taste is sour on my tongue, and I hate it.