When I wake up, I feel much groggier. Slowly, rather sluggishly once I open my eyes I try to sit up. Straight in front of me I see my mother wrapped in a beige coloured poncho with her hand to her mouth. Looks of worry search the doctors face in front of her as they just happen to be whispering about my condition.

As they don't notice me awake, I search the small confined space for Lucifer, but he is nowhere to be found in the room. Has he left?

"Where is Lu-Damien?" I ask probing the attention of two wise owls to look in my direction. The doctor looks much more reassured than my mother.

"He just went to grab me some coffee, he'll be back soon sweetie," informs my mother as she struts over to me and fixes my hair with her perfectly manicured fingers.

She turns her attention towards the doctor who writes something down on his board before officially informing me of what have happened and how they have to take me into the operation to have the rest of my placenta removed that didn't supposedly, disappear, during my miscarriage. But the good news is that I can leave the hospital tomorrow morning.

I snort knowing that there is a condition to this leave, it only applies as long as I don't have another tantrum. That would call for the ground of needing psychiatric help and I don't think it would be appropriate. Besides, my grief has formally turned into anger.

I know I may never be okay with this. Losing a child and my father, but until I get to be the one to get rid of Nina, I won't rest. I'll allow myself to seep into a deep depressive state to grieve my losses, but just long enough so that my anger doesn't dissipate. I will wait for the right moment before I strike.

Once the doctor leaves, I finally receive my mother's attention again. She takes a seat on my bed and corrects the paper-thin hospital sheets covering my body. Smoothing the material with the palm of her hands.

"You will get over losing a child Annabelle," she begins avoiding all eye contact with me as she says her words. Confidently but in a quite tone of voice.

"How do you know? What makes you so sure mama?"

My mother's eyes lift to meet mines. Her lips twitch into a shy smile as she clasps my hands into hers.

"Because I lost a child when I was around your age too."

My mother's words shock me. I never know that this is has happened to her as well. Is that the reason I'm an only child?

"Why have you never told me this before?" I plead for an answer.

The beautifully aged blonde female sitting in front of me sights reluctantly.

"I was twenty-two, young and dating a man I was completely and utterly in love with, much like you and Damien, but things were very complicated between us, there were a lot of people, a lot of obstacles that only proved to us that we aren't meant to be. He was not a good man Annabelle, admitting I do not have a good reputation with the stereotypical bad guys is not something you should be admitting to your daughter."

"We ended up breaking things up, but I found out that I was pregnant and around ten weeks into the pregnancy I miscarried. To say that that it was partially the man's fault would be an understatement, but I grew up to learn that it is not worth blaming anyone for what has happened, not even yourself. The pregnancy was never supposed to happen. Looking back, it was for the better and that is the same for you Annabelle, this pregnancy is not meant to be, and you shouldn't blame yourself for it."

I think this is the most vulnerable I have ever seen my mother being with me. I look at her with sympathy filled eyes as my other hands rest on top of hers in a gesture of appreciation.

"Thank you for telling me mama, but I don't blame myself for the miscarriage. It would have never happened if the...intruder didn't come and murder dad right in front of my eyes," I tell her.

My mother frowns her eyebrows as she looks at me in confusion.

"What do you mean intruder? Your father committed suicide and you walked in on him."

What? How the fuck makes up that story? That is most definitely not how the event occurred if I remember the facts correctly.

Just then we hear a knock on the door and Lucifer comes in with a cup of coffee for my mother.

"I hope I'm not interrupting," he says as he walks inside handing my mother her drink. She takes it with both hands and opens the plastic lid to smell the coffee bean aroma now filling up the room.

"Thank you, Damien," she says as she takes a small sip to taste before putting the lid back on and standing up.

"We'll talk more about this later, but for now you need to rest, I'll leave the two of you alone, sweetie," she says and then presses a chaste kiss on my temple.

Before taking her leave she pats her hand on Lucifer's shoulder, all a little too comfortably and walks out the door.

I narrow my eyes at the action completely not realising for a while that Lucifer is looking at me with a raised eyebrow.

"What?" I snap at him in a somewhat of a playful way, but with a hint of jealousy.

"What's that look for?"

"Nothing," I say the words quickly, letting it slip out of my mouth as quickly as I plotted my back against the bed again.

"Scooch over," instructs Lucifer as he places another drink on the table beside my bed and stands beside it waiting for me to move to the edge.

He lays down onto the bed beside me and I immediately roll over into his side resting my head on his shoulder. He engulfs me with his hands around my vulnerable body.

No longer do I feel the need to have another tantrum but that doesn't mean that I don't feel upset about the situation. Though the word upset would be a huge understatement. I have lost a piece of myself last night. I have lost a family member. A parent. One that I is the closest to even though we were apart for so many years.

I know that my dad's funeral will most likely happen in a few days. In some ways I'm glad that it will happen so speedily. I will grieve my father and baby then focus all my energy on getting back at Nina.

"Are you okay? You are deep in thought," I hear Lucifer's words, but I don't register them.

I tilt my head up to gaze at him. A tired but equally as handsome figure is reluctantly smiling at me. He presses a soft warm kiss on my lips and forehead, squeezing me tighter to his body.

"I know this is probably the last thing you want to think about, never mind talk about, but I need you to tell me exactly what happened, what Nina said to you."

I bite down on my lip, licking as memories of my dad's lifeless corpse haunts my mind. All the blood on the cold wooden floors, mixing with mines. Nina staring down at me with her mouth wide open and eyes almost popping out of her face. I make a sour expression when I think about her.

"Where is she now?" I ask Lucifer.

"Who?"

"Nina?"

"Away from you, she won't be bothering anyone anymore," he replies matter-of-factly.

"Will you be torturing her?" I ask curiously with my voice a little too high pitched in excitement at the thought of Nina getting tortured for all eternity in the most unimaginable ways.

A small crooked smile appears on his face when he notices my reaction as we continue looking at each-other.

"In the worst ways possible," he informs me confidently, but there is a hint of sorrowfulness in his voice and face. His little crease between his eyebrows is just on the verge of forming. Is he feeling guilty about telling me this information?

I simply nod at the recognition of his words before falling silent. I wonder if he will torment her in his big torture room at the cottage or if he will take her back down and do his bidding in the debts of his Kingdom. And I must say, the thought of this is still a little repulsive but it's a distraction. A well needed distraction.

"Did you know my mother was pregnant and miscarried as well?" I ask trying to redirect the topic of conversation in another direction. I need a few more minutes to prepare myself for telling him about the real reason Nina is doing this, and with who!

Fucking Asmodeus! I should have known there is something off about him the minute I met him at the masquerade ball. He is so bluntly rude and so cold towards Lucifer. Can he not have sensed that there is something wrong with him? He is a greedy fucking bastard.

"No."

I smile audibly.

"It's quite the story, but now I realise just how similar in some aspects it is to our story. A girl dating a bad boy who only highlights all the more how wrong they are for each-other, then she gets pregnant and miscarries."

"You think we aren't right for each-other?" asks Lucifer sounding stunned. I don't have to look at his face to know that he is hurt by my statement.

"Well the universe hasn't necessarily makes our relationship easy ever since you told me about who you really are, but I told you many times before, I can't imagine my life without you in it," I tell him as I reach my free hand over to his cheek. My fingers caressing his warm skin in fascination. His hand darts up to my wondering fingers and sandwiches it against his scorching skin.

"You have no idea what those words mean to me, and I know I don't deserve them. I have been putting you through absolute Hell these past few weeks, literally and figuratively, I don't deserve a woman in my life like you, so strong," he pauses to lift my hand off his face and presses a couple of kisses all over my hand before fiddling with my fingers.

"I don't think I voice it enough times, in letting you know what you truly mean to me, and this is probably the worst timing of all but despite what have happened, once you are feeling better, I will make you my wife."

I giggle at his last words.

"Hold your horses, we're gonna have to find my mother an alternative husband to be my step-dad so you can ask for my hand," I say genuinely smiling but then a look of horror appears on my face.

Fuck, is it too early for me to be making such jokes?

"No, no jokes are good, it's your coping mechanism," says Lucifer reassuringly as if he can read my mind. He begins kissing my fingers one by one until he gently bites down on my index finger causing me to pull away in an overexaggerated pain sound escaping my mouth.

"I suppose I should tell you what actually happened now," I say after of moment of silence.

He smiles at me encouragingly.

"You don't have to if you're not ready, I can wait, though I must warn you, the Devil is not known for his patience," he comments with a fruity undertone.

I beam up at him but nod knowing I should just get it over and done with now, so I do not have to talk about the real-life events of what have happened ever again.

I exhale loudly.

"She isn't doing it because she loves you in the way I do, in a way where she believed that it should be her in my place, with you protecting her, loving her back," I begin taking a peak up at Lucifer's face.

He has a look of misperception written all over himself as he grips me tighter and holds his stare down at me without budging any other emotion.

"She is doing it because she is in love with someone else and they want you to, I guess step down from your position as the King, they thought that if they attacked me and my family, you would be too preoccupied with me to notice what they are doing, that is they want to take over the big realms of Hell instead because you supposedly aren't the kind of King they expected, that you aren't wrathful enough." I say all at once.

His fingers dig into my upper arms more harshly, it almost hurts. I know it's not intentional. He's probably doing this because of his emotions right now. He took over after his father, Satan, died. And now someone wants him out. Someone that is supposed to be on his side.

"Who's the other individual?" he asks sternly. His face stone cold, eyes narrowed in hidden rage.

I hesitate to answer him falling so silent until the only noise we can hear is my heartbeat monitor.

"Who is the other individual Anna!"

This time his voice is taut. It is a command rather than a question. Out of not wanting to anger him, I give in.

"Asmodeus."

The word comes out of my mouth before I can rationalise his emotions. He's irritated, that much I can tell. I don't blame him. He just has an extra person to torment.

"And to think I used to consider him my family," he says the sentence with as little sentiments as the meaning behind it.

"I'm sorry," I say knowing farewell that Asmodeus will now get what he deserves. A fully excruciating retribution from Lucifer himself.

"I don't want you worrying about it anymore, I'll handle it," he says authoritatively.

"But-," I begin wanting to argue back. I may not want to talk about what I have witnessed but I am sure Lucifer might want to talk about being betrayed by his so called 'family'.

"No buts Anna, you need to rest and recover, I don't want you stressing yourself out anything anymore, it's all over, they won't be hurting you ever again."

His grip on my upper arms loosens and even though I know I may wear his marks tomorrow morning, I don't seem to mind. It's a pain I welcome with affection because it's just another distraction from the sadness of losing my dad and child. But I let go of the topic. Not wanting to push his limits even though I is just feeling like an eager little girl.

"Who is it that told my mother that my dad committed suicide?" I ask instead, wanting this issue to be put to rest as well.

"I did, that's what I told the police as well, I can't tell them about Nina, otherwise the vile demon would kill everyone at the police station."

"Oh, okay, that's makes sense I guess."

I sigh resting back down onto Lucifer's chest. One of his hands rubs up and down my back, his fingers gently tracing the curve in my spine, while the other toys around with the hospital I.D band around my wrist, which he pulled over to rest on his chest.

My eyes begin to feel heavy and I yawn. Snuggling myself deeper into his embrace.

"You're tired?" he asks softly.

The hand that is tracing my spine has now found its way to my hair, detangling the strands.

I hum my response as I close my eyes.

I wake up jolting upwards. Sweat dripping down the sides of my face. I feel completely out of breath as I hear the pounding of my heartbeat in my ears. The monitor going crazy. It's dimly lit in the room, it must be the evening now, and with December just around the corner it gets dark so quickly.

"Anna what's wrong, did you have another nightmare?" asks Lucifer as he sits up in bed next to me again.

I twist my head to look at him then back out at the nurse standing in the doorway. Out of the corner of my eye I notice he waves her away.

"It is about an... event that happened when I is a child, it-," I pause, getting struck by realisation.

My dad's last words to me.

You not kill.

This can't be what I think it means. It's impossible. I so vividly remember holding that knife in my hand, my hands covered in blood and a lifeless body laying down on the couch. I killed him. My sister is there. My dad saw it with his own two eyes.

"Baby? You look horrified, tell me what you're thinking about so I can help," he says soothingly while rubbing his arms on my arms. Pressing my back closer to his chest as he kisses my cheek down my neck.

"I-I can't," I stutter.

I can't possibly tell him that I am actually a murder. No that is completely out of the question.

"Anna, at this point there's nothing you can tell me that will shock me."

I hold in my breath. Such a big part of me want him to know. Want to tell him so that there wouldn't be any more secrets between us. It would be like a huge rock has been lifted off my chest. He's the Devil for fucks sake. I can have murdered tens of hundreds of people and I would still not be close enough to his numbers.

Get a fucking grip of yourself Anna!

I respire loudly, it almost hurt my chest as my body goes stiff in his hold.

"You don't know the real reason why my dad went to prison," I say.

"What do you mean?" asks Lucifer lifting his up and away from the crook of my neck. No longer can I feel his warm breath on my skin. I liked that closeness. I needed it.

I twist around so that I am half facing him. His perfect facial features are illuminated by the night light.

"He went to prison for me," I voice out loud.

Panicked breathing accelerating within me as I urge myself to continue.

"You know about my sister and how she is sexually abused by my dad's friend without anyone knowing, well when I is eight, something snapped in me, I-I stabbed the man to death!" I say wide eyed.

"But my dad, before he died, he something about me not killing and I can't help but wonder if he finished the job or if my mind is playing tricks on me! and I can't ask my dad because, because he's dead! I can never thank him or ask him about it ever again!" I yell lowly bursting out into tears.

I am so afraid of telling him this. Telling anyone about this but perhaps this is what I need. For this piece of information to be out in the open so that my grieving my father will be easier.

"Oh Anna," voices Lucifer as he gently pulls back a strand of my hair away from my face, places his hand at the back of my head and pulls me into him. The wire of my IV getting tangled but I ignore it. I needed him. He know that because he is offering me his body as a shelter. His arms as a protective barrier from the outside world.

"I can assure you that you didn't kill that man Anna," he says in a sotto voice.

"How do you know?" I ask pulling away and pulling the hair that struck to my tear covered face away.

"Because I can tell when someone has committed murder, I can smell it, and I told you, you smell like an innocent baby, your father did what he did to protect you and with the amount of shock you experienced it's no doubt that your mind will be playing a trick on you," he tell me, his voice appealing to my ears.

He uses his thumbs to whip away the excess tears on my face.

"You've been through a lot, but you'll be okay in the end, and I'll be there every step of the way, I promise."

I give him a shy smile. I cannot believe that he is being so reassuring. Making sure I am not tainted with any more blood on my hands. I truly love this man. Clearly, there is nothing I can say to him that would change the way I feel about him, and hopefully the way he feels about me.

I lean into him again and we lay back down onto the less than comfortable bed. I can't wait to be back in a snugger bed to sleep in.

"You know we will have to eventually talk about the baby as well, and how everyone want me to have an abortion, even Lilith agreed that you'd want it too," I say yawing again.

"She said that huh?" commented Lucifer but it didn't sound like a question. Did I piss him off? His voice sound gruff and taut but his body appears to be relaxed. He's holding back his emotions and it makes me wonder what he is thinking.

"Don't worry, I'll talk with her, you should go back to sleep, you need your rest."