The drive home was quiet – but comfortably so as both men were tired. Axel kept his eyes firmly on the road but he felt his mind continuously wander to Nerezz who stared out the window.

It felt...right to have Nerezz in his car.

"I love the streetlights", Nerezz whispered.

Axel didn't think, "Why?" He asked automatically.

"I don't know...they make me feel free... Like I could go anywhere I want to go – do anything I want to do. You don't get that kind of glamour in the day", Nerezz yawned softly.

It was a cute sound to Axel, and Nerezz's answer was curious. Axel made sure to catalogue it – pay special attention to it when he felt more rested. However, he could relate to it, he loved their warm orange glow, lighting up the car at intervals as he passed under them.

He soon pulled into Nerezz's apartment complex and parked.

"Come up for some coffee?" Nerezz invited.

Axel hadn't actually thought he needed a reason to come inside, it was an afterthought that he didn't live there.

"Sure", Axel accepted, switching off his engine.

The cold nipped at them as they rushed upstairs and inside Nerezz's apartment.

Axel chose, reluctantly, not to fight with Nerezz tonight about not locking his front door. A part of him grew suspicious – he paid closer attention to the long haired man.

Axel sat down on Nerezz's bed again and watched closely as he took off his coat.

Nerezz knew Axel was watching and thought he could pull it off – thought he could put on the performance of nonchalance.

He couldn't, as he struggled to get the sleeve of the coat over his left shoulder. It was slow and he had to shimmy out of it. He closed his eyes and hung his head in defeat.

Axel saw and Axel knew.

"Let me see it", the blonde spoke softly.

"Promise not to get mad", Nerezz felt a new kind of tired.

Axel just sighed, "Nerezz, just let me see..."

Nerezz undid his ponytail, "Okay, but it's kind of in a hard to reach spot..."

His lifted the hem of his grey turtle neck – feeling slightly self-conscious.

Axel didn't even realise he moved to the edge of the bed as Nerezz took off his shirt. He thought he would be nervous or jittery at seeing Nerezz shirtless.

The turtle neck was bundled in Nerezz's hands as his hair fell passed his shoulders.

Axel was hypnotised. He stared at the contrast of Nerezz's milky skin against his pitch black hair. His eyes travelled up Nerezz's hairless torso. The dark haired man was thin but not ghastly thin. His skin was smooth and looked...soft.

Nerezz darted his eyes away as Axel stared intently at him. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, "It's...uhm...over here", he spoke as he moved his hair to one side of his neck so Axel could see the angry red cut on his left shoulder.

Axel got up and was next to Nerezz in a second. He looked at the cut and noted how it started deep but appeared to have gotten shallow in the middle.

His intent was innocent as he lifted his hand to inspect the cut, but he misjudged their proximity as his fingers made slight contact with Nerezz's waist. The smaller man withheld a gasp and Axel felt himself stiffen and swallow thickly.

His skin is soft...

"It's..." Axel began, but his hands seemed to have moved on their own. Of course he knew he was in charge, he knew he was telling his hands what to do – but the inhibition part of his brain just failed as he placed a hand on the small of Nerezz's bare back.

Axel marvelled at the warmth and the softness of the milky skin.

They stood in silence as Axel's orbit shifted, he was now behind Nerezz his hand on Nerezz's waist – as if it had slithered like a hungry snake. He felt Nerezz's breathing turn slightly shallow and Axel was pleased at this response but was left speechless at his own carelessness.

"It's what?" Nerezz finally asked, growing slightly cold.

Axel snapped out of his stupor, "Uh, n-not deep... I don't think-" Nerezz had let go of his hair and it wafted passed Axel as it covered the cut again.

Like lavender and lilies, the scent danced into Axel's nose. He greedily inhaled it, "Jesus, Nerezz... what- why do you smell so good?" Axel placed the other hand that was near Nerezz cut on the pale man's waist as well. Axel's hands felt like they were set on silk, something so precious and expensive beneath them.

Nerezz stepped out of Axel's grasp, the scent evaporated from Axel's nostrils and he felt like he landed face first into cold water.

"Ha, very funny – I stink, it's been a long day", Nerezz mumbled as he put his shirt back on.

Axel felt irritated at Nerezz for talking about himself like that.

Doesn't he see himself?! Doesn't he smell his scent?!

Axel was being hurdled around by the hurricane of his thoughts, Nerezz slipped the shirt over his head and Axel felt like he had to say goodbye to the milky gold.

"Don't..."Axel began but stopped himself.

"Don't what?" Nerezz asked, his back to Axel as he put his arm through one sleeve.

Don't hide your skin from me.

"Don't...scratch it", he said lamely, giving up.

"Sure", Nerezz assured as he carefully put the left arm through the sleeve. He then tugged it on and flipped his hair free.

"Let me make the coffee", Nerezz spoke, walking over to the kettle.

What shampoo does he use? What could possibly smell that good?

"I'll be right back, I need the bathroom", Axel spoke.

"Okay", Nerezz answered distractedly as he scooped some coffee into a mug.

Axel gently shut the door to the mini bathroom and looked straight at the shower. The bathroom was so small that the shower was half of the room. He slid the glass door to the side – noting how difficult it was as he didn't want to make a sound.

He stepped inside and rummaged through the containers on the rack, he found a transparent bottle with a thick white liquid inside. It was clearly cheap but its design made it look luxurious.

Herbal Essence: Lily and Lavender.

I knew it!

Axel flicked the top open and, in embarrassment, took a gentle whiff. He just missed the smell so much, it felt like a drug. He immediately relaxed as the scent danced into his nose again.

He looked at the other containers, there was a matching body wash and a conditioner of the same name.

The whole of Nerezz smelled so amazing...

Jesus...what am I doing?

Axel sighed and put the bottle back gently. He walked a step across the room and flushed the toilet to keep up his charade. He then turned the faucet of the basin and saw a few drops of blood.

His heart sank. He had lost sight of his priorities.

Nerezz cut himself because of me...

Axel felt horrible. He cussed at himself, at his recklessness and inept mind. The memory surfaced...

It was as quick as lightning. Nerezz hand made solid contact with Axel's cheek. He brought his palm up to his stinging cheek.

Nerezz...slapped him? Why? What had he done wrong?

"That's disgusting..." Nerezz spat, tears welling in his green eyes, "That's sick and disgusting..."

Axel was at a loss. What was so wrong with him getting laid?

Nerezz words were venomous, and they scratched Axel's ears. His heart thumped in pain at seeing Nerezz like that, at hearing venom drip from his pink lips.

'Sick and disgusting'...

Axel grimaced at the memory. He flicked his hands dry and sighed...

He opened the door and stepped out.

"Don't do that..." Nerezz spoke sadly, looking away from the tall blonde. He was suspicious that Axel hadn't gotten angry at his cut, but now he saw the pain play across the blonde's face. He didn't want to see it – he couldn't bare to see his blue eyes cast down in sadness.

Axel tried to compose himself but his mind remained on the blood droplets on the basin – it merged the gory image with the innocent scent and Axel lost his composure.

"I'm so sorry Nerezz..." Axel blinked hard, his eyes stung slightly, he didn't want to cry. He heard the thick emotion in his voice.

Tears welled in Nerezz's eyes, he put the mug down on the carpet and basically ran to Axel. The blonde wasn't physically crying but Nerezz could see the emotion on his face, could hear the emotion in his voice.

He wrapped his arms around the large torso, "Don't...just stop...I'm sorry. It's my fault... Please don't be sad", Nerezz begged – trying to stop his own tears. He didn't want to look at Axel's face. He didn't want to see the sadness – he had seen enough of it in his life.

Axel's arms finally wrapped around Nerezz and the black haired man felt safe again, "I'm just tired... I just need some sleep..." The deep voice spoke softly.

"Okay", Nerezz whispered into the sturdy chest. He let Axel go and was going to lead him to the door when the blonde plonked down on Nerezz's bed, closing his eyes.

Nerezz was...happy at the sight. Axel still felt comfortable around him. Even after all those awful things he said in the heat of the moment, the blonde still remained with him.

"I'm going to go shower – I'll be quiet", Nerezz whispered to Axel.

Axel opened his eyes sluggishly, "I can wait for you..."

"No. Rest, I'll be right back", Nerezz spoke, grabbing his pyjamas and closing the bathroom door.

He looked at himself in the mirror and sighed. He was tense and tired.

His eyes found a few specks of red in his white bathroom and he saw the blood droplets on the porcelain basin. He sighed again and washed them off. He turned on the shower faucet and stood under the warm spray.

Axel's hands felt so warm...so...good on my waist.

Nerezz covered his face in embarrassment, hiding his re-emerging blush.

I hope he didn't see me blush earlier...

"Jesus, Nerezz... what- why do you smell so good?" Axel's other hand landed on his bare waist as Nerezz felt the heat radiate off the blonde. He was so close... The blood flooded Nerezz's face and he couldn't stand the electric contact anymore so he stepped away.

Axel...

Nerezz's mind wandered to the blonde as he stared at the white wall.

Axel is a very nice person.

He wanted to think more. Wanted to compliment in greater detail.

But knew the danger of doing so.

Knew the danger all too well.