WARNING: Slightly sadistic scenes and thoughts. (Sadistic meaning, getting pleasure from another's suffering.)

Turtle Side Note: I would like to thank snowkitten14 for inspiring me to write this. Go check out their book "Inheritance". (Link will be attached to this section.)

This was supposed to be a Halloween special... er... I'm only... 13 days late... oops.

Also, I am warning you guys, I wrote this whole thing, in the middle of the night, so, if it seems a bit all over the place (or even "cringey") compared to how my writing usually is, that's why. Now, without further ado, let's jump into this sh*thole you call my writing!

Urge.

A strong desire or impulse.

That.

That's what I felt constantly when he was around.

The feeling ached, it nearly physically hurt. It twisted my soul into the tightest knot, then sent it hurdling to the bottom of my sternum.

Why was controlling myself so hard?

Why did desire always feel like it grew in strength each time it visited?

Why did he have to be the one I craved for?

Just... why?

I stood behind my bar, same as usual. I would keep my stoic expression frozen on my face like a mask, and I would keep my flames as neutral as possible... no matter what happened. It was my job to do so.

I watched as other customers walked in and out, running my tongue against my fangs, keeping the action concealed by my closed lips.

My fangs.

The one thing that made me even more of a freak than everyone else.

I was one of the last monsters alive with any vampire blood left in me, as all the pure-bloods were killed off during the Great War.

But, I kept my vampire side a secret.

I kept it a secret because even other monsters feared vampires, for good reason too. I could kill any one of them, by simply taking them by surprise and locking my teeth with their flesh. I was basically unstoppable since we were locked underground, with no sunlight to protect them.

I let out a breath, scanning the area.

I needed to replenish my magic soon, and I needed to do it without anyone catching me. I knew it was wrong, but I never needed to kill a monster, I just needed to get enough for my needs, cast them with a spell of confusion that my father had taught me, then leave. They would wake up within a day's span, and the most they would feel would be a little dizzy, but they never had any memory of what I had done to them.

The hardest part about being stuck with this near cannibalistic gene was finding a target. A target that I could lure and get my fangs on. A target that trusted me enough to follow me. But most importantly, a target that I would be willing to feast on.

God. It felt discussing to call others, others that I knew, a word like 'targets'. But, dehumanizing them was the only way I could make myself go through with it and not just let myself starve. It wasn't like I had to dehumanize them often, I only had to every six months, for that's when hunger settled in once again.

My nose crinkled as I smelled the air. Everyone in here spelled like vegetables would to a child. They were all warm magic. Warm magic, which was better for me since it was the same type as mine, but it didn't taste or smell nearly as good as cool magic. Jesus, the smell of someone with pure cool magic streams was agonizing. It was like a sweet, chocolate dessert filled with flavors so delectable to the tongue that it made your whole body feel as if it was melting as soon as the substance touched your lips.

I shook my head. I couldn't do that. I couldn't have cool magic. And no, it wasn't because I was on some weird diet, I actually considered myself to be very fit. But it was because I only knew one monster in Snowdin with cool magic who would trust me enough to follow me wherever I led them... it was-

The bell to the front of my diner rang as a customer shuffled in. A shuffle of feet that I recognized.

I froze for a moment as I saw who it was.

It was him.

It was Sans.

For him, it was a normal day, nothing seemed different about this day than any other day. But he didn't know my secret either.

No one did but my father.

I never had the heart to tell him and possibly lose my only friend out of fear for his own life. If I told him, he would have every right to run from me and hide. It would be, in his mind, self defense. I wouldn't ever hurt him, but I don't believe that If I told him the truth, that he would risk staying near me for two more seconds so I could explain that to him.

I loved him.

Maybe more than a normal friend should.

But either way, I wasn't willing to lose him by telling him my secret.

I just couldn't do that to myself.

I watched him walk in, only for him to be immediately flirted with by the drunk, orange, rabbit. Ceecee. He then proceeded to shout a greeting to the diner, getting greetings thrown back at him in return, before he made his way up to the bar and sat up on the same stool he always did with that same wide grin on his face.

I had to take a step back before the scent and intensity of his magic drove me mad.

His eyebrow went up, his eye immediately catching my behavior. He definitely wasn't unobservant, I'll give him that. He let out a breath of a laugh as he asked, "heya, grillbz. somethin' up or did'ya just feel like trippin' over your own two feet?"

My lips tightened into a thin line, as I shook my head at him, rolling my eyes at his tease. I heard him laugh at my response before he said, "hey, can i have the usual? you can just put it on my-"

"Say "tab" and I will throw you into the nearest snowbank." I said, my voice quiet but just as threatening as any raised voice. He and I both knew the whole gag, and we both knew that it was never serious. I knew his situation, and I understood it. He promised he would pay me off once he payed off his hundreds of built up bills, and I knew him well enough to know he never broke a promise. Ever.

His grin melted to one side of his face, pressing the bottom of his eye-socket upward in amusement, "aw, come'on grillbz, you know me. i'll pay ya off, i won't forgettaboutit."

"Mhm." I hummed, stepping forward. I habitually grabbed a ketchup bottle from under the counter, sliding it over to the shorter monster.

He leaned over, catching it, his smell re-entering my senses. Why did he smell so... delicious? Why did it have to be him? Why couldn't I have a craving for 'so-and-so-what's-their-face'? Why did it have to be him that I wanted so badly?

Control.

I had to control myself.

Even if he was the last source of energy I had, I could never do that to him. I could never bring myself to drain him to the point of near-death and just watch him pass out as he fell into a limbo between this world and afterlife. I couldn't do that to him, even if he wouldn't remember it, I sure would. And I knew that guilt would drive me to insanity faster than his delectable scent.

I looked him in the eye.

Control was hard enough when just my primordial instincts wanted him, it didn't help that he was cute too.

And that he was nice.

And kind-hearted.

And funny.

And freakishly smart.

And-

I felt a sudden urge to smack myself on the forehead.

Stupid!

Why was I so stupid!? Why did I have these thoughts? I can't risk to think like this. I have to remain emotionless.

A sudden hand snapped me to the real world, startling me. I looked around, trying to figure out what was going on.

"hey!"

I heard Sans, looking down towards him, to find him leaning half-way across the bar and waving his hand in front of my face.

He was so close. So little. I could easily reach over, snatch him and...

"grillbz, someone asked you for a refill."

It would be so simple, it's not like he would immediately try to run...

"ya know, starin' straight ahead ain't gonna refill a drink?"

Then again, it was still pretty full in here, I would have to wait until later to make my move...

"uh...grillby?"

God, I can only imagine how he-

"are you okay?"

His voice, suddenly sounded very small. It sounded more like the voice you would expect someone with his stature to have.

I snapped from my disgusting, deranged thoughts, looking down at him, meeting worried eyes.

He was still leaning across the bar, not being aware of how much he was taunting my senses. His eye-lights were enlarged with care as he spoke, "dude, you seem kinda outta it today... are you okay?"

No.

"Yes." I answered flatly, forcing myself to breathe out of my mouth so I didn't smell his magic, even though his close proximity led to his icy breath mingling with my flames, reminding me exactly what type of magic he possessed.

The skeleton in front of me blinked, his brows furrowing close together. He didn't believe me, did he? "uh huh..." He puffed out a breath, before, to much of my relief, sitting back down in his seat, "so, do you want me to get Ceecee her drink for you? you don't seem to be feelin' so hot right now."

I jumped a little at the offer, ignoring the pun. I could tell from how he had re-positioned himself that he was ready to hop off, and do my job for me if I took any longer to respond.

I felt my tongue nearly slip on my one-word response, "No." I bent down, grabbing the correct bottle for Ceecee's drink and stood up, only seeing Sans' eye-sockets narrow at me. I pursed my lips in response, his chilling stare freezing me in place.

"grillbz, seriously, you're kinda freaking me out. you look like you needa sit down, your flame's gettin' dim." I watched him gesture to the area above my eyes, realizing myself that my flame was already warning me that I was going to be running on empty soon if I didn't get nourishment.

I shook my head at him, denying his observations as I quickly walked around the bar. I gave Ceecee her refill before promptly heading back towards the bar, seeing Sans give me the same suspicious look.

"if you aren't feelin' well, i can help you-"

"No." I responded monotone, knowing that I had to stay in control, and if I let him help me, I feared that I would lose that control.

I followed his eye-lights as he looked me over, "you work yourself too hard. it's gonna get ya hurt if you keep it up." As he spoke, I watched his eye-lights dart away from me as he propped his cheek against his hand.

I felt a swell of frustration build inside of me. If there was anything I had pride in, it was my work ethic. And I know he knew that. "I am not going to get hurt." I said sternly.

Sans kept staring off to the side, "you will eventually." He said, his pessimistic attitude showing its colors, "and anyways, it don't hurt to get help sometimes."

If I didn't know any better, I would have sworn he was trying to make me go berserk. The troubles with controlling my temptation were hard enough, and now he was flat out insulting how I did my job. "I don't need your help."

"but i need yours?"

I froze in confusion, tilting my head to the side.

He seemed to notice, as he began to clarify, "you insist on helpin' me, but when i try to return any favor, you don't let me."

My flames crackled from the fierce expansion of magic that was growing in my aching chest, "You're being ridiculous, Sans." I grabbed the closest dishrag, squeezing in in my right palm to try to smother the frustration to no avail. It only grew with more intensity.

He laughed.

He laughed?

"no... no i'm not..."

My eyes narrowed at him, even though I wasn't sure why. I wasn't mad at him, I was just frustrated. Frustrated by his presence. Frustrated by things that I knew he had no control over. He couldn't control how he was born. He couldn't control the fact that I was craving for a dessert-like, cool magic this feasting period. He couldn't control how he felt about the current situation. Yet, I was acting like I was mad at him for it, when I should be mad at mys-

"grillbz...you need help, at least for today. everyone needs it at--"

I felt my flame explode.

I couldn't handle it.

My hunger, his smell, him just being him, the way he was talking to me, my raging soul, it was too much. It was like shaking a can of soda until it exploded.

"WHAT CAN YOU NOT GET THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULL ABOUT ME NOT WANTING HELP!?"

Silence.

The whole diner shushed.

And eerie atmosphere falling over the facility.

Everyone looked shocked.

Especially Sans.

I had never yelled before. Ever.

My voice felt raw, my magic felt drained, I felt my flames cool down into a deep, dim, red. I looked at all the customers' shocked faces and wide eyes. Sans looked like he had just witnessed a city crumble right in front of him. His expression was of blank, dumbfounded shock, while all the others looked nearly petrified.

I held my breath, watching as the first customer inched out the door, slowly followed by all the rest.

Except Sans.

He just sat there, seeming to be trying to process what he just heard.

Culpability.

Responsibility for a fault or wrong; blame.

I felt my flames puff out a bit of smoke, this overwhelming feeling of fault crawling through the walls of my chest. I angrily threw the now seared dishrag down, before heading towards the back room to get away from Sans.

I marched to the door, forcefully slamming open the entrance to the back room where I kept supplies. I stormed over to a corner with stacks of flour bags, hopping on top of the shortest flour pile. I sat down, my back resting against the taller stack of flour behind me as I stared at the wall in front of me.

My soul twisted.

Fucking hell, I was hungry. And guilty. And a complete idiot who can't keep their temper.

I lulled my head back, wondering...

What the hell did I just do?

My flames flickered, as if they were trying to explain to me how much of a failure I was at keeping things I care about and staying in control of my desires.

As I mauled in my own self-misery for what felt like forever, I heard a familiar shuffle and scuff of feet. My head lifted itself almost mechanically as the being the sound belonged to appeared next to the stack of flour I was seated on.

Two, glowing eye-lights looked up at me.

"hey..." Sans said, meekly, "i just... wanted to let you know...i'm not mad at you...and i'm sorry." He looked down at the floor, his form appearing even smaller than usual from the height of the flour I was sitting on.

I felt like my soul had just snapped into two from his voice. He didn't sound like himself, at all. I felt my eyes soften, his scent welcoming itself to my senses, "I'm not mad at you either, but you don't have anything to be sorry for." I mumbled, my usual soft voice coming back.

He looked up at me, his eyes surprised by my response. I don't blame him for that reaction. "oh...?" He said it as if he was asking a question before I watched his usual lazy eyes fill with confusion. "but, i-"

I could read his face, I knew he was about to try to throw the blame on himself, just like he always does, so I cut him off, "You did nothing wrong." I sighed, looking down at my hands that were limply hanging off of the edge on my knees, "You were just trying to be a friend."

I watched him out of the corner of my eye as he opened his mouth, as if he wanted to interject, just to then shut it as if he lost track of what he wanted to say.

My soul growled inside my chest. It was getting impatient. It wanted food.

I looked straight ahead of me, towards the dingy brick wall. Holy hell, he smelled good. My body wanted- nearly needed his magic.

I stopped my thought, forcing myself to think straight. I needed to get him out of here before I did something I'd regret. "I... think you should go now."

He didn't move, he just kept looking up at me from where he stood.

"Sans." I said, sternly, "You should g-"

"why?"

I snapped my head towards him, to see him standing with his arms crossed. His magic would be like candy to me. Sweet, thick, creamy, candy. My soul ached for even a taste.

His head drifted to one side as he waited for me to answer, opening up his neck. It felt like he was unintentionally volunteering himself to me. I could easily jump right now and sink my fangs in between his vertebrae and have what I desired. But I forced myself to sit still.

I gulped, pulling my eyes away from him as I spoke evenly, my voice never failing me, "I know what's for the best. Don't question why I told you to do so. Just leave."

His nose pushed closer to his face as it crinkled, "what the hell does that mean?"

I glowered at the brick wall in front of me, "I am begging you to leave." My voice came out as a hiss as I was tempted to fall into my native tongue. "Don't you trust me?"

He refused to listen. He blinked, his eyes calming, "i...i do but..." He shook his head, his stubbornness reemerging in his demeanor, "grill, what's goin' on?"

My flames flickered with savage intentions, "Sans, now is not the time to question me." I warned, "Leave now before something undesirable happens." I bit back a growl.

From my peripheral vision, I could see his features slowly soften, his arms falling to his sides, "grillby..."

There was that tone again. That tone that was far too kind compared to what I deserved. My soul churned and grumbled. It hurt. I dug my fangs into the inside of my bottom lip as I squeezed my eyes shut. Don't hurt him. You've managed to control yourself for years, don't fuck it up now.

...

My flames flickered.

I heard movement to the side.

There were times, where I was sure Sans didn't understand when to give up... This was one of those times.

I jumped as I felt something shift and rock the flour I was sitting on top of, before I felt the presence of someone sitting across from me. Something cold gently brushed my arm and rested on top of my hand.

My eyes flickered open and I saw Sans sitting across from me, his hand placed gingerly on top of mine.

My eyes must have looked wild to him, for I felt like every alarm inside my body was ringing off, yet he just kept a calm, soft, smile on his face. "if somethin's botherin' you... you can tell me. i'm all ears." I felt his thumb kindly roll over the top of my hand in a calming manner. He had no fear in his eyes. He wasn't scared of me, and I wanted to keep it like that. I wanted to stay like this... but...

The monster inside of me wanted something else.

I felt my normally yellow eyes increase in temperature, increase in desire, as they turned from a golden yellow to a threatening white.

Just a small bite wouldn't hurt, now would it? The devil's tongue slurred the thought through my mind.

Sans' face shifted as he saw the change in my appearance and froze, "uh... g?"

I didn't answer him, I just stared at him as if I was a predator and he my prey. Like a cat playing with a mouse.

"what are you-"

He let out a surprised yell as I flipped my hand, grabbing his wrist. I yanked him harshly toward my body and threw both of us off the pile of flour, landing on top of him on the ground a few feet below where we were originally seated. I heard his bone slam unforgivingly into the hard, cement floor, watching his face contort in pain mixed with delirium from the suddenness of my attack. His breath hissed in distress as his body noticeably coiled, his teeth grinding together in a way that seemed almost more painful than the fall he just had.

I took the advantage I had been given, pinning his arms to his sides with my legs, knowing that he needed his hands to perform any kind of magic-based attack. I hovered over him, catching my breath as I watched him come to. His features shot wide in bewilderment, not seeming to be able to process what exactly had just happened.

He looked up at me wildly, despite his body being frozen from shock, "i...i?" He stuttered through his shaking breath. Under me, I could feel his chest rising and falling erratically, "wh, what's goin' on?" His already shaky voice slowly morphed into panic as it rose in pitch.

I felt my own body shudder I realized what I was doing. But there was no backing out of it now, I had to commit to my action. My voice came out as barely above a whisper, so soft I wasn't sure if he even heard me over his own frantic breathing. "I told you to leave..." I swallowed saliva that had built up in my mouth, giving myself more time to think, "... I'm so sorry for what I'm about to do...forgive me." My voice hissed the last words as my bottom jaw trembled, revealing my sharpened fangs to him.

His eye-lights shrunk. I felt him go rigid under me as his eyes connected with my fangs, "... grillby?" His voice could only be described as a pleading whimper.

I chose not to respond, my upper fangs hanging out and over my lip as I dug my teeth into my own skin. I looked his over once more, before re-positioning myself into a more comfortable straddle over his form and leaned down.

I was barely an inch away from his neck, feeling his cool, candied magic radiating off of his body and brushing against my face. I listened closely, hearing his soul buzzing abnormal fast, his whole form far too tense for me to get to a magic vein without harming him.

"Shhh." I cooed, trying to get him to calm down at least a bit to avoid hurting him more that I already have.

I felt him shiver under me, even though there was no possible way he was cold now. He then seemed to attempt to crane his neck away from me, but I stopped his movement, using my hand to gently hold the his neck in place, my hand cupping the opposite side of the part I was preparing to be bitten. It wasn't like my teeth could cut through bone, I had to be sure to go in between two of the vertebrae.

As my had cupped his neck, I heard him make a small, almost foreign sound.

At least, a sound foreign to my ears.

It sounded almost like... he was crying.

I squeezed my eyes, my conscience stabbing me in the abdomen and twisting the blade for good measure. But, my monster payed no attention to the smaller conscience, pushing my head forward, ignoring the distress from my old friend.

My warm lips connected with his neck as I gently bit down, my teeth slipping seamlessly through the space between his bone, hitting a vein. I pushed my teeth harder against the vein, feeling my teeth break through, opening it up to me. He sucked in a breath mixed with a yelp, resulting in a strange hissing sound that didn't sound natural in the slightest. I felt him try to squirm, his chest pushing upwards towards mine, but I pushed my body weight into him, ceasing his movement as my teeth injected him with my own magic that acted as muscle relaxant.

However, he was still fighting against me, his movements so small, that one may consider it to be pathetic, but I saw it to be closer to courage.

My lips remained connected with his neck, and despite the relaxant, I could still feel his chest pushing against mine as he tried to force me off of him without his magic. He was surprisingly powerful for someone his size, but, his efforts were for nothing as I easily held him down.

I pulled my fangs from his neck, the cool liquid pouring out of the entryways I had created. As the thick, syrupy, liquid came to the the surface, I put my warm tongue against the surface of his neck, using it to help me suck the sweet magic into my mouth.

Words were unworthy to describe the flavor.

It was sweet, sugary, and it felt almost like a cream. It was something beyond the addictiveness or seduction of any chocolate or candy. The way the liquid oozed down the back of my throat and how the flavor would linger on the tip of my tongue was tantalizing.

I continued to embellish myself in my meal, siphoning the godly taste from its owner. I felt myself melt into the taste, a passion driving over me that made me a bit too hyper aware of the noticeable discomfort from my shaking prey, and the few entreating whimpers that escaped him.

I hadn't realized how sensitive he would be. He never struck my as the type of person who would be this squeamish.

But, that didn't stop me from continuing to treat myself. I had completely lost control of my lust for his magic, and nothing would stop me from draining him.

I thought I heard him try to say something, but all I could make out were a few high pitched squeaks before the sound, ever so slowly, became silent. I felt his once rigid, shaking body slowly go limp under mine. Everything, completely relaxing as I felt the flow of magic slow.

I didn't want to stop, I wanted more. I didn't want that flavor to go away. But...

My conscience's voice grew into a scream for mercy, scaring the beast away into its dark, dreary corner.

I felt myself stop, pulling away for my friend in a hurried motion as sense was suddenly knocked into me like a brick being thrown at my head.

I had pulled back just in time to see his eye-sockets slowly flutter closed, into a dazed, unaware state, as he lethargically fell into the realm of unconsciousness.

The slight blue tint that was usually held in his cheeks to signify he was healthy, was no longer present. Instead it was just pale, bone-white. His skull had lulled to one side, showing the obvious deep blue bruising around the marks my fangs had dug into his once unscathed neck.

I quickly pushed myself off of him, kneeling down next to his body instead. His whole form looked completely limp, one could mistake him for a dead man if they didn't see the barely noticeable movement of his chest, weakly rising and falling.

I stared at his form in disbelief of what I just did.

I just...

What the hell was wrong with me?!

I wish I had given him the chance to punch me across the face with all his might, maybe that would have snapped some damn sense into me.

I groaned in frustration and guilt. If I had a time machine, I'd go back and literally beg him to beat the living shit out of me. But even that wouldn't be enough to validate the sick, disgusting thing I just did to him. I completely took advantage of him, for something he couldn't even prepare himself for, and after all he has done for me up to this point. What I had done was a stab in the back for all the compassion and overwhelming kindness he has given me up to this point.

Good job, me. Good fucking job.

I let out a shaky breath as I looked at his body. I quickly realized, that the sound I heard earlier was indeed crying.

On his cheek bones, there were undoubtedly stained tear trails.

That was how bad I had scared him.

And that was something that hadn't happened before. I had never scared someone to the point of crying. Who knows what was going through his head, but whatever it was, it clearly was horrible.

I felt sick. I felt like throwing up. Disgusted with myself. Disgusted with the fact that I had actually gotten pleasure from what I just did to him.

I gulped, before I pushed my hand down through my sleeve, grabbing the cloth material in my hand. I leaned over him, using my other hand to lift his body as I dried off the tear streaks from his face.

I readjusted him into a more comfortable cradle in lap, as I hovered my hand over his bruise. I focused, summoning green magic to at least partially heal the injured area. The least I could do at this point was lessen the pain in anyway possible. I watched as the magic slowly went into the bruised area, the color slowly morphing from dark to light blue and the marks left by my fangs becoming nothing more than slight dents.

I finished, my hand dropping to my side as I held my unconscious friend in my lap. I looked down at his relaxed face, feeling my sins crawling up my back, making my whole body shiver. Guilt churned in my stomach, making sure it punished me the best it could. It made my body shake and my flames crawl. I could barely take it, half of me wanting to embrace his small form, the other half of me wishing I could through myself into a lake right now.

I sat there, holding him for a for God knows how long, wallowing in my own self-misery before sleep took over be, lulling me into a world of darkness.

*****

I woke up.

I had no idea how long I had been out, but it felt like hours.

I looked around in a daze, seeing nothing had changed in the scene around me.

Suddenly, I felt something stir in my lap.

I looked down to see Sans, his body slowly twisting as he seemed to be waking up.

I jumped, realizing I hadn't done the spell yet. The spell to make him forget what had just happened. But, that's when I stopped myself.

Did I really deserve the luxury of him forgetting?

Did I really deserve the luxury of him being my friend, after I probably just scared him to the point where he most likely thought he was going to die?

The answer to both of those would be no.

But...

Did he deserve to remember something, that from his reaction, was probably traumatizing?

The answer to that, was also no.

But... I believed he deserved to know the truth... even though it would hurt him. I couldn't bring myself to lie to him. If he decided to turn me in and get me executed like any other vampire, then so be it. I deserved it anyways.

I sighed, gently putting him on the ground, then pushing myself against the nearest wall. I didn't want to be holding him if he was now scared of me, I didn't want to freak him out anymore than I already did, or in worst case scenario, put him into shock.

Now... all I had to do was wait for him to wake up...

The beast inside of me had won.

And this time, I was going to force myself to pay for it.

...

No matter how much it hurt.

Turtle End Note: ... Yup... It just ends... right there. It's up for you to decide for yourself what you believe the strings of fate have planned for these two. Aren't indeterminate endings the best?