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Gradient: if I ask you a question about a boy do you promise not to be weird?

Ink: I promise.

Gradient: there's this boy at school-

Ink: you can do better.
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Ink: my mascara is to expensive to cry over you.

Bonus:
Nightmare: Jesus, all I said was I was sad.

Ink: then don't come to me. We aren't even friends.
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This ones from vine.

Ink: Pj.

Pj: yeah mom?

Ink: don't fight an ugly girl she's got nothing to loose.

Pj: I'll keep that in mind Mama.
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Also a vine (just altered)

Ink at a PTA meeting:

Some parent: Oh my god, Inks kids are so annoying

Ink: I heard you were talking shit about my kids.

Parent: what the fu-
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Ink: I think the hardest thing is raising three children.

Dream: I thought it was only Pj and Gradient...

Ink: have you not met my husband?

Dream: good point.
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Pj: Mom, I'm going camping.

Ink: if you get eaten by a bear make sure a councilor is near by. Then they'll be blamed.
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Gradient: Can I have another soda?

Ink: What did your dad say?

Pj: No.

Ink: then why would I say yes?

Gradient : because he's not the boss of you.

Ink: it's a trap it's a trap it's a trap.