Two days later and Harry was in Manchester.

Harry was staying at Gemma's for a few days as Anne thought it'd be good for Harry to see his sister. Stay a few days to and go have fun. Harry understood, his mum wanted him to get out of the house and have his big sister cheering him up. Harry didn't like the idea of facing his sister at first as he was afraid she was going to the whole 'I told you so' thing. Harry just wasn't in the mood to venture around the city.

But, he gave in last night when Gemma had came down for a Monday visit. Which was just odd since she only came down to visit when it was holidays or come stay for a few days. Obviously, that wasn't the case when it revealed over dinner that Gemma came to steal her brother away for a few days.

Staying with Gemma meant having the mornings to yourself as she is working. However, Harry knew when Gemma was out, she was going to drag Harry around. Make him have fun and get his mind off Louis.

Right. Louis. Harry hadn't spoken to him since their fight. Louis sent Harry the first text yesterday morning. Saying he was sorry and wondered if Harry was still mad at him, but Harry never responded. Not to any of the other texts Louis had sent him these past few days. Left on read because what was there to say? Harry didn't want to talk with him because he was still hurt from what left Louis' mouth. The fact Louis wanted a break from their relationship. Even though Louis had been trying so hard for Harry's forgiveness and begging to talk. Almost forgetting he was the one who wanted this stupid break in the first place.

Harry didn't understand Louis sometimes, to pretend things are fine when really they weren't.

Typical, Louis.

The thing was though, Harry was not going to waste his time, not until he will get a sincere apology.

Because what was even the point?

"So, I was thinking we get to the mall we should grab a bite to eat at the foodcourt and then around shops a bit." Gemma suggested as if Harry was made of money. "We have three hours until the centre closes and I want to make sure you're having fun on this gloomy rainy day. We're not leaving until you buy something." As if Harry wanted to spend what little he had on clothes or eat greasy food, Harry would much rather read a book.

"Can't we just go to a cafe or something? I don't feel like shopping, Gemma." Harry truly wasn't. Not only that, but Harry didn't want to go to Manchester Arndale Centre.

"You don't feel like doing anything, though." Gemma pointed out as she pressed on the break when she came to a red light. "Listen, I know you're sad and all, but this will be good for you. I promised mum that I'd get you out and about. Rain or shine."

"How will making me broke be good for me? I don't have a lot to spend." Harry stressed, crossing his arms as lightning flashed across the evening sky. "Unless you're planning to buy me stuff which I highly doubt you'll do."

Gemma sighed as she pressed on the accelerator, as a rumble of thunder reached Harry's ears. "Dinner's on me and who knows, maybe I'll buy you a new shirt if you keep whining about it."

Harry wasn't crying about anything, Gemma was the one about ready to throw a tantrum if she didn't get her way.

"Besides when we come back from the centre, we're going to binge watch romcoms and stuff ourselves with sweets," Gemma went on as she turned right. "This will be night one of operation cheer my baby brother up."

Harry wasn't sure if he was up for all that. A little too excessive for his liking as he'd much prefer not to watch romance movies. The last thing Harry wanted to do was eat all that sugar, but apparently Gemma thought it was some master plan that'll work. That Harry will supposedly get on board with all because of some guy. Hell no. Harry knew it wouldn't work because the minute he got a text from Louis or see a character that will remind him of Louis, his happiness would be gone in mere seconds. No amount of candy and fizzy drinks could cure Harry's heart.

If only it were that easy...

"Whatever you say, Gems." Harry murmured, as his gaze flicked out the window as pearls of rain slid down the glass.

Half an hour later and Harry was sat at a table with Gemma outside Bagel Nash, not exactly Gemma's first picking. Gemma wanted something greasy, but Harry didn't want that. Not when he had been dragged out to some overly crowded mall he didn't even want to be at. So, thankfully Gemma gave in, and they decided on something a little healthier. So Harry was content with his minty green smoothie and chicken caesar wrap. Gemma, on the other hand, wasn't too pleased with Harry's picking, mentioning that she'd be happier with a burger than a wholemeal bagel.

Ugh, she sounded exactly like you know who, and it almost made Harry lose his appetite.

"So... have you talked to him?" Gemma brought up casually as Harry slurped down some of his drink. Gemma looked curious with her manicured brows raised and her gaze focused.

Harry chewed on the inside of his cheek as he shook his head, his shoulders drooped.

The corners of Gemma's lips slid downward, "Has he even texted you at all? Or at least called?"

"Yeah, but I don't want to talk to him." Harry said truthfully as he took a bite of his chicken wrap. Not loving that concerned look Gemma had on her face. Harry didn't need her sympathy and he sure as hell didn't want any advice either. He wanted Gemma to leave it alone and forget about it, talk about her life instead.

But unfortunately, things never go to plan.

"Can I see them?" Gemma questioned and Harry furrowed his brows. Can I see them? What was that supposed to mean? Did Gemma want to snoop through his phone again? Because Harry was not too sure if he wanted her to have his device in hands. Especially since he got texts that weren't meant to be shared and also some topless photos of Louis. Not in the mood to be teased about that because Harry just didn't have it in him. Harry even didn't like talking about Louis right now, but Gemma wanted to keep on with it. Not that it was a surprise.

"Oh don't give me that look, Harry. I just want to see what he's said to you. That's it, I swear I won't read more than I'm supposed to or go through your top secret photos." Gemma proposed and that was kind of tempting. Could Harry really trust those words though? "You know if you let me do that, I'll have you decided what romcoms we can watch later."

Harry still wasn't too keen on the whole romcom thing, but he did like the idea of choosing what films to watch. However, that didn't mean sharing his messages. Especially with Gemma no less.

Gemma frowned and stuck out her bottom lip, her expression crestfallen etched across her face.

"No. No, no, no, and no. I know what you're trying to do, Gemma." Harry wasn't dunderheaded, Gemma was trying to get her way. "I'm sorry, but how is you going through my texts going to be any help?"

"I never said anything about helping you, I just want to know what Louis said." Gemma explained as if that was a reasonable point. "I mean, after all he made you upset and as your wise older sister, I've got to look out for you."

"I don't need you to look out for me, I can handle myself." Harry stressed as he took a sip of his drink.

"Can you really, though?" Gemma questioned as she took a bite of her bagel.

Harry didn't like the snarky undertone. "What's that supposed mean?" Harry inquired, taking a sip of his smoothie.

"I mean, let's face it, you're hurting. Mum asked me to come get you because she knew I'd do whatever to make you happy. Instead of sitting around sulking over some stupid boy that made you cry."

The corners of Harry's lip twitched downward as he glanced down to his food, his mind going back to the fight Louis and him had. It made Harry feel sick and he didn't even want to finish his half gone chicken caesar wrap. Just thinking about that night in general put a dampening on Harry's already fallen mood. Harry cried to his mum about it, told her everything, and still didn't feel a lick better about it. Honestly, Harry felt worse even talking about it and that's why he doesn't want to tell Gemma everything. Not when Harry already feels heavy-hearted enough as it is.

"You know, I like Louis, I do. He's wonderful to you and I approve of him." Gemma said. "But, I'm royally pissed at him right now."

Harry sighed as he glanced back up at his sister, her eyebrows pulled down in concentration, as she took a sip of her tea. Maybe Harry was being a little bit hostile towards Gemma when she's been nothing but generous. Taking time out of her life to cheer Harry up, having him stay over and do whatever it took to get Harry's mind off him. All of because of Louis.

Gemma truly was a good sister, whether when she was utterly annoying or not.

"Look, you don't have to show me the messages if you don't want to. I'm not going to force you to." Gemma commented as she slurped down more of her tea. "I just thought it'd be good to see where Louis' head's at. Especially since he's not here and I can't give him a piece of my mind."

Harry thought for a moment as he swallowed down more of his wrap, would it be a wise idea to show Gemma? Afterall she's always been right with her assumptions even when Harry didn't want her to be. Not only that, but she's family and Harry knows Gemma's just being a little overprotective. Probably not wanting Harry to get hurt even more, but she can't always be there to save him.

Sometimes Harry has to save himself.

"Okay, fine. But don't be snooping around where your nose doesn't belong." Harry warned as he pulled his phone from his pocket, typed in his password, and then handed it to Gemma. Harry prayed Gemma would just listen to him for once because he just wasn't in the mood for teasings about certain things on his device.

Gemma beamed as she glanced down to Harry's phone her thumb slid across the screen. Her gaze strong on the screen and her brow furrowed as Harry sat there watching Gemma, downing more of his smoothie.

"You know, I think he wants to make up with you." Gemma stated as if Harry didn't already know this. "He said he's sorry at least three times here."

"If he truly meant it he'd come up here and apologize to my face, Gemma." And that was all Harry wanted. For Louis to come here and say he was sorry for what he said, because they weren't nice and not okay. Just thinking back to the argument made Harry no longer in the mood to stomach his smoothie.

"Do you want me to tell him that?" Gemma questioned, but Harry shook his head. Gemma frowned, as if she had expected Harry to say yes. "So you want him to figure it out then, I take it?"

"I suppose." Harry murmured, but the thing is will Louis ever realize that?

Gemma frowned as she glanced back down at his phone as she went back to what was in front of her. Harry ended up getting to his feet and went over to toss the remains of his dinner into the bin, no longer hungry.

But when he returned back to the table, Gemma had this smirk across her face as she peered down at the iphone in her hands. Harry furrowed his brows as went stomping over and stood behind Gemma's chair and Harry almost screamed. Gemma was going through older texts from Louis and Harry was quick to snatch his phone from her hands.

"Hey, I wasn't done, yet. It was getting good." Gemma complained as Harry pocketed his phone and went back to his seat as he shot a glare at Gemma. "Man, oh man, the things I just read... you're no longer pure, I see." Gemma had this smug look across her face. Harry was mortified! He could feel the heat inching to his cheeks, Gemma was definitely not going to let this one go. "We'll definitely talk about this later."

"No, we will not!" Harry snapped, he didn't want to talk about his sex life, and he sure as hell didn't want to share it with Gemma. His sister. Shit, Harry didn't even tell Ed or Niall, his two best mates of many years.

Gemma smirked, "How big he is, I bet he's big. Is he, H?"

"It's none of your business." Harry replied sharply as he got to his feet, ready to march away from this conversation.

"You need to calm down, I'm only curious, no need to be so overstrung."

"Well, I just don't want to talk it about, Gemma." Harry explained as Gemma gathered the remains of her stuff before tossing it out. "Can we just go shopping now or whatever it is you dragged me out to do?"

Gemma rolled her eyes, " Fine, we can go waltz around some shops, but this conversation isn't over. I still want to know everything."

"Gemma!"

Gemma just smirked and walked away, her smugness was anything but amusing. Harry just hoped this conversation would be anything but a distant memory later tonight.

Last thing Harry wanted to do was reminisce even more about Louis.

Two hours pass, and Harry was with Gemma at Topman, as apparently Gemma was in the mood to be generous. Obviously she was wanting to do whatever it took get Harry's mood off the floor and thought buying him some clothes would really do the trick. Harry didn't need a makeover or a new pair of trousers to make him feel better. Harry just wanted to leave and get away from the masses of people, which Harry was thrilled when the centre was closing in less than an hour.

Harry stood there as Gemma skimmed through racks of garments, pulling various collar shirts and sprayed on trousers. She ended up handing Harry a light pink, mint, and navy blue short sleeve oxford shirt. Some pairs of dark washed jeans to match. On the brightside, Gemma seemed to know Harry's style, but then again still didn't mean Harry was up to have his sister spending her hard earned money on him. All because she felt sorry for him, but what would Harry do? Gemma was persistent and determined to make sure Harry was having a nice time.

At one point she had led Harry over to the changing rooms and told him to go try things on. Mentioning once again they weren't leaving the mall until Harry's gotten himself a new outfit. Harry protested and told Gemma he was broke, but she just told him to suck it up and don't worry about it. Right, don't worry about it. As if Harry could get past the part of someone spending money on him. Great, now he'll have to pay her back soon.

Once in the fitting room Harry unbuttoned his shirt as he felt his phone buzzed against his thigh. At first, Harry wasn't so sure if he should even take a look at who just messaged him, afraid it might be you know who. Not wanting to ruin his mood more than it had been, then again what if it were important? Ugh, Harry felt ill as he slid his top down his arms to the floor and grabbed the pink button down. Harry fluttered his eyes closed when his phone vibrated once again, and fuck it. Harry needed to see it, he needs to know who was trying to get a hold of him.

Harry hung the shirt back up as he pulled out his phone, seeing he had two new text message notifications. Both from Louis.

And Harry couldn't do it, he just couldn't. Too afraid to look and see what it was sitting in his messages unread. Not even wanting to feel worse especially with Gemma waiting on him, not wanting to be drilled with questions because Harry couldn't do it right now, not when his heart was still in shambles. So he ended up pocketing his phone and promised himself he would get back to these messages later when he would be alone in bed.

At first, Harry was against the idea of having Gemma pay for his things, but Harry had actually came around to it. Especially when he did a once over in the mirror with the black sprayed on jeans and that light pink collared button down, it looked quite nice. Something Harry could see himself wearing instead of his usual white button up. Switch it up a little, and maybe he could pay half with Gemma to make himself feel better. Hopefully, his sister would agree to that.

From the moment Harry stepped out away from the changing room he was greeted by his overbearing sister. Who had her arms crossed and her eyes narrowed as she stared at Harry when he came closer, almost as if... fuck. She could tell, Gemma could see something was visibly wrong, and Harry wanted to toss the clothes to the floor and run away. Far, far away. Not wanting to face these demons because Harry knew once Gemma had him alone, she wouldn't give it a rest. Not until the honest truth was brought to light and known every little detail. Great, Harry tried to keep an unreadable expression on his face when he came out, but apparently Gemma could see right through it.

Harry tried to act like he wasn't affected that he wasn't terrified to see his texts. Especially not when Gemma asked him what shirt and trousers he wanted, he tried to not sound so anxious. Maybe if he sounded okay Gemma would think she's read him all wrong. Harry's heartbeat quickened when he felt his phone buzz in his pocket, making him feel utterly sick. Harry's certain that was a text from Louis and not knowing what the other two texts had said made his anxieties raise. Especially if this is who Harry thinks it is. Not knowing Harry needed to calm down though, the way Gemma staring at him suspiciously as they stand in the queue to pay for Harry's things had made Harry feel sweaty and hot.

"You look a little flush, H. Something wrong?" Gemma asked curiously with a wrinkled brow.

Harry shook his head before he wiped his forehead with the back of his hand. Harry's chest felt tighten and he couldn't take Gemma just staring at him suspiciously anymore.

God, will this line hurry the hell up!

"You're such a terrible liar." Gemma pointed out as the queue moved up. "Louis texted you, didn't he?"

"Why are you asking so many questions?" Harry inquired sharply as he rubbed the back of his neck.

"Because I'm your smart older sister that knows you like the back of my hand, so I know for a fact it's about him. You're anxious." Gemma pointed out and Harry hated that she was too damn intelligent for her own good.

Harry wished he could prove Gemma wrong, act as if everything's okay so he doesn't have to talk about it. Especially right here in a store that's crowded because everyone's doing their last minute shopping. Harry just wanted this line to get a move on so they could leave.

"Just relax, okay? We're supposed to be out having a good time like I promised mum." Gemma commented as the queue moved once again. "And I know I brought him up, but it's all for good intentions."

Right, good intentions. Whatever that meant in Gemma's terms.

"Whatever, Gemma." Harry murmured under his breath as his gaze fell to his boots.

By the time they left the centre twenty minutes later, they were caught in traffic and it was storming. About ten minutes from Gemma's flat and Harry was just so glad to be away from the masses. Especially since it was going on eight o'clock and Harry was ready to settle down for bed. Yeah.... right, bed. More so sitting around the telly and watch those stupid romance films Gemma wanted to watch. Harry thought of all the excuses as he sat there watching the rain pelt violently against the window. Harry could tell Gemma he's got a bit of a headache or stomach ache. Or maybe Harry could just say he was tired. Then again knowing Gemma, it may just be a waste of time making excuses.

Ugh, Harry didn't know what the hell to do.

Later, Harry was sat on Gemma's couch in his pyjamas, throw pillow tucked between himself and the arm. Thin blanket over his lap as he waited for Gemma to come back from the kitchen, as she was in the mood for sweets already. Harry wasn't, even the thought of popcorn and crisps didn't even sound good. Nothing sounded good and hopefully Gemma wouldn't try to pester Harry into eating ice cream or chocolate because he was sad. Actually, Harry preferred to just go lay in bed and relax, but it seemed as if that'd have to wait.

Harry let out a sigh as he pulled his phone from the pockets of his sweats. Seeing that red bubble with the number 3 on it staring back at him on the messages app. It made Harry's stomach twist into knots, he knew who they were from. Harry knew Louis had been trying to get a hold of him. Begging for any sort of contact and just to know they were okay. But Harry couldn't do that, just willy-nilly pick up the phone and have a chat or exchange texts. Like they were good and that argument never happened. Because, then why was he even here?

It was like Louis couldn't get it.

And Harry felt almost too apprehensive to even check his texts when he was in bed later that night. Afraid he may end up even more dejected than before because what if Louis wanted to break up? Like Harry couldn't even think about that. Louis was his boyfriend and sure, Harry may be hurt, angry, and sad at him. That didn't mean Harry wanted to lose him, to lose his best mate. Harry can't picture his life without Louis and he hoped it went both ways.

But Louis needed to make things right before they would be okay again.

"So, I've decided we're no longer going to watch rom-com's because I have an even better idea." Gemma announced as she came into the living room.

"And that is?" Harry questioned as she sat down on the other end of the couch with a bowl of chocolate ice cream. Harry could see that smirk she had across her face and oh god, what was she scheming now?

"Well, I know what always cheers me up when I'm sad and that's hot men." How was Harry unsurprised that'd come out of her mouth? Such a Gemma thing to say. "So we're going to watch Magic Mike because I think seeing a nearly naked Alex Pettyfer will make everything better. Because he's so fucking fit."

"Gemma, I don't want to watch that. I've already seen it with Niall and besides why on Earth do you think I want to sit here and see it with you?" Harry didn't understand in what world Gemma thought Harry would agree to this? First of all just because it had some very attractive actors in it didn't mean it'll make Harry's day suddenly brighter. Not only that, but it'd just be too awkward with the nudity and other sexual stuff. Harry just wasn't so sure, it was one thing to see it with Niall because They just had to see it! But with his sister it felt weird.

Gemma sighed, "I don't care if you've already seen it, I want to watch it. Also it's a good film regardless, I've seen it at least six times and it never gets old."

So, it looked like Harry was stuck watching that, great.

After the light had been turned off and the movie started, Harry tried to pay attention but his mind was elsewhere. Harry couldn't stop thinking about those unread messages in his inbox. Especially when he felt his phone buzz in his hands half way through the film, the screen brightened up and it was a text from Niall. Harry wanted to see what his friend wanted, but that meant seeing a preview of Louis' too and it made Harry's heart quickened in his chest. Harry was torn on what to do, to check his texts right now or not. It made him feel a bit nauseated and he told himself to wait, maybe having a look at Facebook will be better, after all it had been a minute since he was on it let's face it, Harry wasn't watching the movie.

And that's what Harry did, which was a big mistake. Harry had accidentally pressed Louis' name as he was on his top news. That was when Harry seen it...

♡ It's been complicated with you

Right there, right fucking there on Louis' intro section and it reminded Harry just how fucking heartbroken he was. The fact Louis had to put it out there on his Facebook profile for everyone to see was enough to make Harry's mood plummet. Harry understood that they were on a relationship break and they had a big fight. Still it didn't mean it tore at Harry's heart to see Louis making it official that things were in fact complicated.

Harry couldn't do this right now, sit here and stare at Louis' stupid profile. Being reminded that things are a mess and that they're not okay. Harry could just feel the wetness shimmering in his eyes as he exits out of the app and goes to his messages. And fuck it, Harry needed to see them, he needed to know what Louis had sent. Because Harry just can't wait around anymore, not after what he just seen.

When Harry went to his inbox, he'd went straight to Louis' messages (he'd get back to Niall later) and he almost lost it. Louis sent him two texts saying Hey you and You there?

But it was the last one that got Harry the most.

'Louis: Just please talk to me. I miss you, babe.'

Harry's mouth quivered as he bit back a frown, blinking way the wetness begging to escape as he pushed the blanket off his lap. Got to his feet and hastened towards the guest bedroom, shut it behind him. Sat on the plush bed, lamp on the nightstand turned on, elbows propped on his thighs, Harry put his face in his hands. Warm tears just slid out and god, Harry felt heavy-hearted. Louis really just couldn't expect Harry to be okay. Harry was anything but that and it was frustrating.

The bedroom door creaked open seconds later and Harry wanted to tell Gemma to leave him alone, not wanting her to see him like this. Crying over Louis but he couldn't seem to stop it. Not when he felt a body sat beside him and a light hand on his shoulder. Naturally, Harry felt a bit embarrassed to have Gemma witness him in tears as he never liked to cry in front of people. And it was stupid, so damn stupid that he was wasting these tears all because of one text.

Harry sniffled as he tried to wipe his eyes dry, but tears just kept coming. Maybe venting to Gemma would make him feel better.

"He broke my heart." Harry murmured sadly as he squeezed his eyes shut as Gemma patted his shoulder. "I know Louis misses me and wants us to be okay, but a part of me feels like I don't fit."

"What do you mean by that, H?" Gemma asked as her hand fell from Harry's shoulder.

Harry sniveled as he flicked his gaze at Gemma before he said, "Louis' got this amazing life in London without me. He's got an internship, new friends, and everything's just so wonderful there it seems. And yet I feel like I don't have a place, like I'm left out because I can't be there with him." And that was the honest truth. "I just feel like I come last."

The corners of Gemma's lip twitched downward as she shook her head, "Harry, don't say that."

"But it's true, Gemma. I'm just some broke university student that happened to be dating Louis."

"And yet, he loves you. Louis may not be my favorite person right now, but I know he cares." Gemma stated tenderly. "If Louis didn't then you'd be single instead of just taking a pause in the relationship. So obviously it tells you that he wants you around."

Okay, maybe Gemma did make a fair point. A few actually. But still, Harry just felt so out of place he didn't know where he belonged in all of it. Like they were in two totally different stages of life and it was like Harry was holding his boyfriend back. Well, that was what it felt like at least.

"Just because you're still working on you future, doesn't mean he's giving up on you. Louis knew what he was getting into before you both decided to finally get your head out of your arses. You're about to head back to uni in what? Two weeks or so? Louis will come around, you just need to be patient, H."

"And what if he doesn't?"

"Then it's his loss, because you deserve someone that'll be there for you no matter what." Gemma replied in a soothing tone, her eyebrows pulled down in concentration. "But I have faith that you both will work this out."

"Thanks, Gems." Harry breathed out as he wiped at his nose. His eyes felt like they were rubbed raw and just burned. Tears no longer slid out and Harry just felt so exhausted. Ready to just sleep this night away and forgot it even happened, because maybe that'd be for the best.

Hearing Gemma's advice and kind words had made Harry feel a bit better. Put things in perspective that if things were meant to be, they'll find a way. And Harry hoped in the end it would all work out.

"I think I'm going to lay down for the night, Gemma. I'm awfully tired." Harry just couldn't sit here anymore and keep sobbing about it. It was draining and Harry didn't like the fact Gemma got to see him get so emotional like that. But whatever, nothing he could do about it now.

Gemma gave an understanding nod as she gave Harry a pat on the shoulder once again before she was on her feet. "If you need to talk or can't sleep, I'll possibly still be up." Gemma let out as she made her way over towards the door, but glanced over her shoulder and added "But no more crying over him, okay? Sleep well, H." She left closing the door behind her, leaving Harry all alone with a phone filled with unread texts. And a heavy heart that was aching in his chest.

Harry had ended up in bed shortly after that, listening to the rain pining angrily against the window as he scrolled through his phone. Harry was exhausted, yes. But he was also checking to see what Niall had to say earlier. Which turned out to be asking Harry how he felt about coming out Friday for a night out since Zayn will be up and with the possibility of Ed being there. At first Harry wanted to say no. The idea of spending his night around drunk people wasn't something Harry wanted to do, then again maybe it'd be best to spend time with his mates. After all, his mum would love for Harry to spend time with his friends instead of sulking. Not only that, but maybe it'd get his mind off things.

So with that said Harry sent Niall a text back saying he'd go, but he didn't want to be out all night.

Eventually, Harry had tossed his phone onto the nightstand and ended up passing out utterly exhausted.

Harry roused from a deep slumber when a ringing sound pierced the air. Harry sighed as he rolled over, blinking his eyes open, reading the time on the clock beside his phone. Harry nearly cursed when he saw it was midnight. Who the hell thought it was the perfect time to chat? Harry was rather irritated that he'd gotten woken up. He wasn't sure if he even wanted to answer and just let it run its course. And that what Harry had did, but to no avail his phone went off again.

Harry couldn't take it anymore and grabbed it from the bedside table and answered it. Pulled the blanket tight to his chest and was about to muttered out a Hello. Well, that was until the person on the line started to talk and Harry's heart stalled.

"Harry, babe... I'm so sorry, so fucking much. God, I'm such an idiot." Louis said into the line. "I know you were probably sleeping but I needed to talk to you, shit, I miss you."

The corners of Harry's lips slid downward hearing Louis ramble on how apologetic he was. If Louis thought for a second that they were about to make up over a late-night call, he could think again. He couldn't even understand how Louis even thought he would do such a thing.

"I was such a dickhead and I feel so bad for some of the things I said to you, I never meant to make you upset like that. I knew you were crushed when you left and I felt so fucking awful." Louis sounded sincere and yet so, brittle. Almost as if he was about to burst into tears and it weighed Harry's heart to even think of such a thing. As much as Harry was upset with Louis, he didn't want his boyfriend to be sad like that, no. Harry had always thought of Louis as overly confident and strong, so to hear him be on the brink of sobbing was harrowing.

"I know you're probably furious with me for waking you up and still don't want to talk to me. I don't blame you at all."

Harry couldn't do this anymore, hearing Louis run off at the mouth on about how sorry he was. It was making Harry's mood fall even more. From Louis about to weep on the line, waking up to answer a late night call, and the fact Harry was still out right cross with Louis over everything. Harry just couldn't take it anymore.

"Baby-" Louis started but Harry interjected, not wanting to hear anymore.

"Louis, it's the middle of the night and I was sleeping. If you think for one second that I want to hear your apologies right now, you need a reality check. I'm still mad at you, you can't just ring me and expect I'll be okay with it. Do you not understand what you said to me the other day wasn't okay?" Harry stressed into the phone, his throat started to feel painfully tight as his eyes were on the clock. "You broke my heart and I don't even want to talk you right now, so I'm going to go bed now. Goodnight, Louis."

Harry hung up after that, not even giving Louis a chance to even start talking because Harry couldn't do it. If Louis had, Harry wasn't sure if he'd be able to keep himself together with the mix of emotions he was feeling right now. That was why Harry need to stop it before it happened.

Great, now Harry was awake and his mind hung up on Louis once again. Thinking over those things Louis just said to him was too much for Harry to handle right now. He felt ill and just wanted to sleep this off, but before he could toss his phone back onto the nightstand it buzzed in his hand. Harry swallowed hard as stared at the screen and seen it was a text from Louis, his chest hitched when he decided to go see what that was about because he couldn't just fall asleep with an unread text, especially not after that call they just had.

And Harry wished he didn't...

'Louis: I love you so much, and I'm sorry I hurt you.'

Harry let out a whimper as his lower lip quivered, he just tossed his phone onto the nightstand as it went dark, and pressed his face into the pillow. The warm blanket pulled closer as the pit of his stomach just felt so hollow and his heart in shambles.

All Harry wanted to do was stop thinking about Louis because he was just so done.

*****

The rest of the week passed in a blur and eventually it was Friday night and Harry was getting ready to head out for the night. Still undecided if he should wear his hair up or down and if he should even wear a light jacket. Afterall it was the beginning of September and he wanted to be prepared in case the late night suddenly turned cold. Ugh, Harry didn't feel up to do any of this honestly, all he wanted was to just stay home and relax. But no, he stupidly agreed to come because it'd be good to see his mates and get him out of the house. His mum of course didn't mind when Harry told her the other night when he came back home. Probably happy that he wasn't going to sit around and mope.

But that still didn't mean Harry was all for it. Probably would have been more accepting if it didn't mean he'd be surrounded by revelers making an ass of themselves with one too many to drink. On the brightside he wouldn't be the only sober one of the night since Zayn would be there. As he was taking off to his parents after they leave the pub as he was going home for the weekend, Harry thought he was mad for leaving so late. But then again it was Zayn and he probably wanted to spend as much time as he could with Niall. Not that it came to a surprise, really.

As Harry slipped on his white button up and fastened it up, there was a soft knock against his door before it creaked open. Harry flicked his gaze towards his door where Anne had stepped in with a warm smile was across her face.

"What, mum?" Harry asked as he smoothed out his top as he made his way over towards his mirror and did a once over. Making sure his hair looked somewhat decent even though it wants to be stubborn today. But whatever, not like Harry's trying to impress anyone, just wanted to show he had his life together. Especially since Zayn would be there, Louis' best mate.

Harry didn't need Zayn to see him at his worst. Or anyone for the matter.

"I was just checking to see if you're still going out with your friends. But I think I've already have an answer to my question, you look handsome." Anne beamed as she stepped a bit closer. "I also wanted to see if you're okay?"

Harry couldn't blame his mum for wanting to know where his mind was at, after all it had been one hell of a week. Anne's just a concerned mother that wants to make everything okay, be there for a shoulder to cry on or just be there to listen. Harry had always appreciated his mum and truth be told, if Harry didn't have a close relationship with his mum he'd be a mess. She's always been there and knew when Harry wasn't happy. It was like she just knew before anyone else could pick up on it, even before his own sister. Those two may know him best, but Anne took the cake. Mum knows best.

Harry gave a small nod before he said, "Yeah, I'm fine." it was a stretch of the truth, but maybe Anne was too concerned over other things to even notice.

Anne crossed her arms as she asked, "Do you not want to go?"

Of course, when will Harry ever learn that lying would get him nowhere. Especially with his mother.

Harry sighed. "It's not that I don't want to go see my mates, it's just that Zayn will be there."

"Zayn?"

"Niall's boyfriend, mum."

"I know who he is honey, but why are you getting so nervous at the thought of being in the same room as him?" Anne inquired as she tilted her head to the side with raised eyebrows.

"Because he's Louis' best friend and they live together. I just... it's stupid." Harry shook his head as he moved to sit on his bed, gaze fallen onto the hands in his lap. Harry didn't need to be telling his own mum why he was feeling quite anxious over being around Zayn. Probably wouldn't understand the fuss, but Anne was as stubborn as Harry was. He knew once she sat down beside him on the bed she wouldn't budge. Not until she got a little insight to see what has got her son on edge.

"It's not stupid, you can tell me." Anne countered. "If you don't want to you don't have to, but I just want you to know your mum is always a good listener." The corners of her lips slid upward. Harry was a bit torn on what to do, should he tell his mum that he was quite overwrought that Zayn will try to guilt trip Harry into talking to Louis. Or the fact Zayn may also have a sketchy trick up his sleeve and Louis could be there at the pub. So much possibility was riding on that and Harry was unsure if he needed to tell her all of that. However, she wasn't wrong about being a good listener.

Maybe it'd be a good thing to just vent to Anne a little bit, could possibly ease his nerves. Not only that but Harry trusted his mum wouldn't go gossip to Gemma or even Jay. God, Harry prayed Anne hadn't told Johannah anything that had happened. Fuck. Harry nearly forgotten that Louis and his mum became good friends and keep in touch. Ugh, Jay probably already knew Harry had been sulking for days and more than likely went off and told Louis.

Damn, Harry hoped not.

"What if Louis' there? I don't know if I even wanna see him, mum." Harry stressed as he glanced to his mother. "I'm still quite upset with him and I'm just a bit worried that Zayn had brought him along. Force us to make up." Harry would love to be on good terms with Louis, but it was too complicated right now. Especially when the other half of your heart wasn't even there when you need them.

"If he's there you don't have to feel obligated to do anything and if it gets to be too much for you, come home." Anne advised and Harry did like those words. "But I think you'll be okay as long as you try to have some fun tonight and stop worrying about the what if."

Harry bit the inside of his cheek as he picked apart his mother's words. Maybe she was right. Harry should stop worrying about the minor things and just try to have a nice time with his mates. Even if that meant sitting around watching them get shitfaced, Harry would attempt to at least. Shit, Harry could also make a promise to himself not to pick up his phone more than once (well unless something happens) because maybe it'd help.

"I think you'll be okay." Anne said calmly and Harry could only dream of it.

A little later, Harry found himself putting on his boots as Niall would be here soon, with Zayn of course. Harry's chest felt like it was caving in on him the longer he sat here in silence. Anne was far too busy chatting away with Gemma on the phone about whatever it was on his sister's mind. Harry couldn't help but wonder if it'd be just three of them going to the pub to meet up with Ed. If Ed shows up of course. Harry missed his mates, so it'd be nice to play catch up. Especially before he headed back to Southampton soon.

Harry had eventually gotten a text from Niall telling him that they were outside. So Harry quickly pocketed his phone and waved at his mum before he stepped out of the house. Harry blew out a series of short breaths as he veered towards Zayn's black car. Harry felt the air become increasingly warm and he was thankful he decided on not to wear his jacket. The idea of sweating profusely wasn't something Harry up for. Not tonight.

Once Harry was sat in the backseat he was just so thankful he had the space to himself. So Louis didn't come, good. Made Harry feel more at ease that he doesn't even have to worry about his boyfriend trying to woo him back. Then again, Louis could be already at the pub waiting for Harry to show up. That got Harry thinking that he shouldn't totally rule anything out because when it comes to his boy, he may still show up.

Not only that, but Louis was hard headed.

"Glad you decided to come to the pub, H." Zayn mentioned as he pulled out of Anne's driveway, Harry had met his gaze in the rearview mirror. "I know it's not your scene, but it'll be great. Ed's already there with Nick." So Nick was there too? Not that Harry minded, he liked Nick.

"It'll be amazing, us lads all together having the best night ever." Niall beamed. Hmm, That was a pretty massive claim that it'll be a blast. Harry'll have to see about that.

"Not everyone one, Louis won't be there." Zayn chimed in and thank heavens. That made Harry feel immensely better that his worries were suddenly irrelevant. "He's got that thing with his colleagues tonight." Oh... Harry had forgotten about that.

Harry couldn't even think about that, not with everything else that had been festerting inside him for days. So Harry decided to just not think about it and pulled out his phone, doing a puzzle instead.

When they had finally arrived, and found themselves inside the overly crowded building, Harry followed Zayn and Niall as they held hands. Eventually making there way over to a table where Nick and Ed were already drinking, probably already a little buzzed.

"Oi! About time you guys showed up, we're already on our second beer of the night." Ed shouted to them as Zayn and Niall sat across from them. Harry just pulled up a chair, already felt a bit cramped sitting here with is friends.

"Yeah, we've been sitting here for what? Fifteen minute already?" Nick huffed.

"I had a bit of a late start getting away from London, but we're here now, aren't we?" Zayn pointed out and Ed nodded. "Besides not like I can drink anyway."

"Forgot you're going home tonight, but more for us I guess." Nick shrugged as he took a swig of his beer. "Are you gonna try some tonight and let loose, Harry?"

Harry shook his head.

"I think you're talking to the wrong person, Nick." Ed laughed as he shook his head, gulping down more of his drink.

"Well, it was worth a shot." Nick commented and Harry appreciated his mates trying to get him open up more. Drinking however wasn't something Harry could get on board with. Not just so he can "let loose" and have a grand ol' time with his friends. No.

"Anywho, I'm going to get me another beer. Niall? Nick?" Ed glanced at the two boys, probably seeing if they wanted something. "Harry? Do you want one of your virgin drinks?" Ed laughed but Harry rolled his eyes.

"Please." Harry said coolly as Nick had gotten to his feet before he followed Ed. Probably to help bring back the drinks or chat up the barman. Or any man that was over there for the matter. Either of those sounds about right.

A few minutes later, Ed and Nick had returned with a round of drinks and started going on about their lives. Nick had brought up that he'd looking into being a science teaching assistant with his degree. As he was ready to settle down and get serious about life. Harry was glad to hear Nick was getting everything in order like Zayn and Louis had. Harry had only hoped the best for his mates. Harry could only wonder how his life will be once he's gotten his degree and truthfully, he was a bit petrified. Not that he doesn't, like, have a plan. Harry knows he wants to be top of the class, always. Have perfect grades and a flawless CV, but Harry had no idea where he'd like to work.

And this got Harry's mind rolling as he sat here while his mates chatted and downed their drinks. Harry had thought maybe he could go somewhere in Manchester, where Gemma was at. That way he'd be close to Anne. However a part of Harry was thinking London, because the thoughts of working near Louis sounded amazing. Louis had asked him if he come down there for a job after all, so Louis seemed all for the idea, especially when it meant Harry to be close. From the transferring university to a job, it was quite obvious what Louis was trying to imply. But the only thing was, is that what if things don't work out with Louis in the end, everything so complicated right now Harry's not ever sure how things will be days from now. Weeks, if that.

Harry wanted a future with Louis, live together, get married, and have a family. Harry knows most definitely he wanted all that with his boy. Of course he had never outright told Louis any of this, well other than Louis just joking around that they'd be married in the long run. Harry never planned to tell Louis that anyway, not until Louis would bring it up himself. Last thing Harry wanted to do was get his hopes shot down and scare Louis away. Then again, Louis had said he wanted a family someday, so maybe Harry was a part of his wishes too.

But that was so far ahead of Harry's time, it wasn't something worth stressing over. Especially when Louis and him aren't even good.

After awhile Harry grew bored and tired of sitting here. Nick and Ed had ended up by the billiards area and was starting a game up with fellow pub goers. Zayn and Niall were off in their own world, Zayn's got his arm around Niall's shoulder, and talking quietly amongst themselves. Harry's drink was long gone and was ready to get another one, and that's what Harry had ended up doing. He makes his way over and approached the bar. Ordering himself another drink.

Harry found himself alone for few seconds until someone was beside him and it wasn't someone Harry had expected. Not standing so close that is. It was Zayn and Harry was confused because he was staring at Harry with an unreadable expression across his face. It was strange and what was even more mind stalling was the fact Niall wasn't there beside him. Those two were nearly inseparable, so Harry had a feeling Zayn was here with a purpose.

"Can I talk to you for a second, H?" Zayn questioned as the barman sat Harry's drink onto the counter.

Harry was rather ambivalent about Zayn wanting to chit chat, alone. They're hardly ever just went off and gossiped about the latest rumors of the day. Shit, the only times Harry had ever actually seen Zayn was when either Niall or Louis were there. Or when he wanted something. Which Harry had a feeling about that.

Harry grabbed his drink from the counter before he said, "Uh, yeah. Sure."

Before Harry could take a sip of his sparkling water, Zayn got him by the arm and leading him away from the bar. Harry didn't say anything as he followed Zayn until they were off in a corner where it wasn't so busy. Zayn had eventually let go of Harry's arm and started speaking.

"How're you?"

"I'm fine." Harry lies.

"No, seriously, how're you doing?" Zayn pestered more and Harry had a feeling that this conversation wasn't about how he'd been enjoying himself.

Harry sighed and took a sip of his drink before he responded, "I've been okay, I suppose."

There was a brief silence that lingered in the air for a moment until Zayn crooned, "He misses you, you know." Harry's heart stalled at those words. Like, he knew Louis had been longing to hear back from him. Yet, hearing that leave Zayn's mouth hit him round the head like a rucksack of bricks. "Louis' a mess, H."

"A mess?" Harry murmured as he tightened his grip against his cold glasses.

Zayn gave a heavy nod. "He hasn't, like, said he is but I can tell. He keeps checking his phone waiting to hear back from you. He's told me that you won't talk to him."

Harry swallowed at that as he peered down to this glass for a moment. Harry had this pain in the back of his throat the longer Zayn went on.

"I know I shouldn't be the one telling you he's sorry, but just understand that he's hurting too." Zayn went on as if Harry didn't already know this. "We've went out for drinks the past few nights and he just... it's not right. I know Louis' been under stress with his band going on a hiatus a few weeks ago and showing up late to work. I get it." Wait what? Louis' band is taking a break? Why did Louis never tell him this? Everything seemed fine at the wedding and it panged at his heart Louis didn't say a word to him about it.

"But he wants you in his life and I can see that. Yeah, Louis' always been that guy that puts on a front and pretends like everything's okay. But I can see through it." Zayn explained as his arms fell slack at his sides. "I just think you should call him and talk. Agree to meet up and make up. Whatever works. Life's too short to be unhappy like this, and it sucks seeing my two mates miserable over one another. So, just, give it a thought okay?"

As cliche as what Zayn just said about life going by in the blink of an eye, he wasn't wrong. Hiding away from Louis (who wanted to make up) was doing no good, especially since they were both miserable. Where they could have kissed and made up and be merry right now. Like, of course Harry missed Louis, shit, he really did. Just because Harry was longing for his boyfriend to come around, he still had many emotions about everything. From the part where Louis insinuated that his mates time was more valuable to the whole uni thing, it bothered Harry. Louis may have apologized many times to him via texts, but it still hurt. Like a wound that just won't heal no matter how many times you put a clean bandage on it.

However, Harry wanted his boy back. God, Harry truly did. From the late night calls that kept Harry up well into the night and the texts here and there. The sheet forts, film marathons, band gigs, the kisses, and all that stuff. Harry fucking missed his boyfriend so damn much. Thinking about all that now struck Harry in the feels, and you know what? Maybe Harry should call Louis. Ask him why he hasn't come seen him and didn't say anything about his band. Just wanting to hear everything come out of Louis' mouth, Harry wanted that so bad. But what if he calls Louis and can't form a proper sentence? Just standing there like an idiot unable to voice his feelings.

But that was a chance he had to take because Zayn was right.

"I'll think about it." Harry finally settled as Zayn broke out into a buoyant smile.

"You know," Zayn said idly, "I always thought Louis would end up being this bachelor having meaningless one stands. Avoiding any sort of commitment that had to do with feelings because he's been burned in the past. But ever since you came along I've had a change of heart because I knew he'd fall for you. You made Louis so happy. You're, like, perfect for him and I truly hope you both work this out."

Harry's pulse raced after Zayn said all that. Harry watched him turn on his tail and veered away out of his sight.

And that was when Harry decided he'd call.

Five minutes later, Harry was outside the pub sat on a bench. Trying to think of everything he wanted to say. To all the questions he wanted answers to. Harry felt his heart already kicking up into his throat slowly as he pulled out his phone. His mind an utter mess as he scrubbed his hand through his mess of curls as typed his passcode into his device. About ready to tap on his phone app until he sees a notification from Instagram saying Louis Tomlinson had posted a pic.

If Harry had his priorities straight he'd just call Louis right now, but of course he didn't. Harry was a big fucking idiot because he decided to go see what Louis had posted. Sat here outside of a pub where a few people were smoking and exhaling their smoke into the night air. Talking amongst their group of mates under the dimly lit building by a shoddy lamppost. It reminded him of Louis, sitting in the car outside one of their halls, back in uni, and Louis having a cigarette. Kissing and long road trips. Parties and that night Louis persuaded him to come to London with him as they became friends. Harry fucking needed his best friend back and it tugs at his heart. God, he was pathetic, utterly in love and just so eager to have those memories back.

To create more memories with the one boy that has the other half of his heart. The one who Harry had gotten his initial inked onto his skin for the rest of his life. Harry needed Louis in his life and he was just so tired of feeling so blue.

But when Harry saw the photo Louis posted he was confused. Louis doesn't seem sad at all being in a group selfie with his colleagues. He seemed... happy? Almost as if he was already over it all and just having the time of his life. It made Harry feel ill and the only thing that made him feel a tiny bit better was the fact Liv was nowhere near him, off by Ellis flashing her pearly whites. But still, Harry couldn't get over the fact Louis seemed okay, that maybe he wasn't so down after all. That Zayn was blowing things out of proportion because Harry was dating Louis and Harry was Niall's best friend and didn't want things to be awkward. Louis was probably just felt guilty and probably buzzed when he called, or just felt lonely that day. It made Harry so sick that he just pocketed his phone and heads back inside, ready to leave. Harry couldn't do this anymore.

Once Harry stepped inside he glanced around until his eyes honed in on Niall beside Zayn back at their table. Zayn got his arm around Niall as they swallowed down their beers and happily chatting away. Harry was already marching over there, trying to keep himself together with every step he took.

After an eternity, Harry stood in front of the table with dropped shoulders and dull eyes. "I think 'm going to leave, I've got a massive headache." He fibbed hopeful and eager to get back to Anne's. Safe haven from the chaos around him, where his mum would be there with comfort foods and an ear to hear all about it. Maybe this made Harry out to be one of those unreliable friends that just up and leave whenever they please. But he just couldn't do this. He needed to go home.

"Are you sure, H? We were all about to go play a match of pool soon." Zayn announced as he took a swig of his beer.

"Yes, I'm sure. My head's pounding." Harry needed to get the hell out of here and with the way Niall was looking at his peculiarly didn't make it any better. Now was definitely not the time to have Niall asking questions and try to figure the truths from the lies. Harry just wanted to call a cab and forget about the rest.

"Feel better, H." Zayn had this sympathetic look across his face as Niall gave a nod. Uncharacteristically quiet, but Harry didn't want to stand around and figure that out. So, he just gave them both a small wave before he turned around, and walked away. Making his way over and saying his goodbyes to Nick and Ed who were getting another round of drinks, giving his apologies that his night came to a tragic end as he felt ill. Thankfully they seemed okay with it when Ed gave him a pat on the back and told him to feel better. Thank god. Harry had then wound up back on the bench and waited for his cab he just called. Arms folded across his stomach as he watched the passing cars go down the street.

Outside of the pub was quiet this time, no smokers lurking around, and just the noises of the automobiles cruising past. There was a slight chill in the air and Harry almost wished he had brought his jacket, but whatever. Too late now.

Soon enough Harry was no longer alone and he felt someone beside him, Niall.

"What happened?" Niall asked as Harry stared down to his lap as he let out a breath. Niall, his dear best mate, always there to make things better when no one else seemed to be. Trying to figure out what had gotten Harry so moody or just downright upset. Harry knew Niall would have texted him at some point after abandoning his mates, it was a given. Curious to know what went on and if he was alright. Not that Harry could blame him. Niall was a good friend even when he was a bit selfish at times, he still cared.

"I'm just tired, Niall." Harry sort of lied, because honestly he felt like just calling it a night. Maybe it'd actually make him feel better. "Didn't sleep well last night."

"You know you can tell me what's really going on, Harry." Niall insisted as Harry gnawed on his bottom lip. "I care about you and I know I'm not much help, but I can sure as hell try."

Niall surely wanted to make this hard for Harry not to give him any insight, playing his best mate card oh so well. Harry just didn't feel up to discussing his feelings especially outside of a seedy pub where anyone could come waltzing out to eavesdrop.Yeah, Harry would rather not.

Not only that his cab would be here soon, so why even explain to Niall when their talk would get cut short?

Maybe Harry would get back to him later about, depending on Harry's mood of course.

"Niall, I just don't want to talk about it right now, okay?" Harry stressed as he looked at Niall finally. "I've got a ride coming any minute now and I just don't want to talk about Louis." Harry needed Niall to understand that now wasn't the best time. Wanting him to just drop it and go back inside where his boyfriend was, just leave Harry alone to sulk in peace.

But of course, Niall was relentless.

"How about I come stay the night then?"

"No, absolutely not."

"Oh come on, why not? You clearly need your best mate of many years tonight, and besides, we've made plans didn't we?" Niall prompted as he nudged Harry in the arm.

"Yeah, but not plans for tonight. I just wanna go home and unwind. That's it." Harry explained, and sure it'd be nice to have someone to talk to. Especially when he couldn't sleep. Not only that but it'd be nice to finally just spend time with Niall, they've talked about these plans, but had yet to do them. However, Harry wasn't certain tonight was a good time.

Maybe next week or so?

"We can unwind together then and besides I told Zayn that I was going off with you anyway, trust me. You need me." Niall was being a stubborn bastard. Not that it even came to a shock. "Besides when's the last time we actually just hung out, the two of us for more than a few hours?"

Niall was making this hard for Harry to keep coming up with reasons to say no.

"I swear I won't even be on my phone that much this time and you don't have to talk about a certain someone if you don't want to. I won't force it out of you. But I just think you could use a friend."

Damn it, Niall. Harry was finding it much harder to even say no at this point.

"Niall, you've got Zayn back inside who came to see you, don't worry about me. I'll be fine. Besides I've got plans to read a book or do a crossword." Harry hoped Niall would just stop and leave it be. "We can do something together soon, I just think I need to be alone right now."

Niall had a ghost of a frown as let out a huff of defeat as he got to his feet. "Okay, fine. I won't bug you anymore about this, but it doesn't mean I won't text you later." He reached over and gave a pat on Harry's shoulder before he said, "Cheers, mate." And then he was gone.

That was quicker and painless than Harry would have thought. Maybe Niall was finally getting it that pleading your case over and over wasn't going anywhere. About damn time. Now Harry could go home and call it a night.

Thankfully, his cab eventually pulled up.

Later, Harry was sat at his desk making up a list of everything he needed to bring with him to uni. Might as well get a head start on that instead of waiting last minute. Harry just wanted to make sure he wouldn't forget anything and just have something to mark off when the time comes. Because Harry Styles second year was going to be great. Even if his spirits weren't exactly ideally where they should be, at least his education would flourish. Being prepared and just on top of it all, nothing was going to stop Harry from having an amazing year. Boyfriend troubles or not.

But then again, in the back of his mind he'd love it if Louis was there pushing him along until he finished. But at this rate, that was being wishful.

Harry had his elbow on the table and his chin propped up on his hand, reading over his list.

"Pens.. stapler.. bed sheets... laundry basket." Harry listed off more to himself as he read over the essentials. It was bit of a mundane task, honestly. But Harry didn't have much else to do. Also, it helped get his mind of certain things, not only that but it gave him an excuse to not look at his phone that had seemed to affect his mood in more ways than one. As it already had four new texts sent to his phone over the span of an hour and Harry just didn't feel up to checking them.

Just as Harry was about to print off his list after finishing it off, the sound of his phone ringing pierced through the quietness in the air. What now? Clearly it had to be important because someone was trying to get ahold of him. Harry wondered if he should just let it go to voicemail n case its someone he doesn't want to chat with. Not only that, but Harry still needed to get things done, he only had less than two weeks to prepare.

So, Harry just let it go as he pressed the print button as the ringtone died, moving to grab the paper from the printer and set it aside. Grabbed his multi-coloured highlighters and a black pen from his pencil holder and wrote a little key up in the corner. Basically to show what the colours had meant.

But, Harry's self discipline took a dip when his phone sounded off again and he was getting out of his chair. Reaching for his phone that was plugged on the charger on his nightstand, Niall's name was across the screen. That was a sigh of relief honestly, but what could Niall want now though? Wasn't it pretty clear earlier Harry wanted to be left alone> Maybe Niall hadn't learned anything afterall.

After Harry pulled it of the charger he answered it, "What Niall?"

"Jeez, Harry. I don't even get a hello?" Niall complained into the line and Harry just rolled his eyes as he sat on his bed.

"I'm not in the mood to be courteous, unfortunately."

"Don't be so moody, we've got a whole night ahead of us and I don't want your pessimism latching onto me." Niall commented. A whole night? What? Niall wasn't still planning to come over was he? Harry thought they already discussed this. Apparently Niall must have had amnesia or something.

"Niall I already told you I wanted to be alone." Harry stressed into the line as he furrowed his brows.

Niall sighed on the other end of the line. "Calm down, I'm not coming to sleep over of that's what you're worried about." Harry would just wish Niall would say what it is for the reason of his call so Harry can go back to more important things before bed. Harry decided he's change into his comfortable clothes after he gets off this phone.

But what came out of Niall's mouth next might have changed those plans...

"We're going to London."

"What! Why in the hell are we going there for?" Harry didn't want to do that, Harry should be in bed soon. Not sat in a car for nearly four hours all because Niall was up for a joyride in the middle of the damn night.

"So that means you're coming?"

"No I- "

"But don't you want to go see Louis?" Harry's heart stalled at those words and then it all suddenly made sense. Niall wanted Harry to go see Louis and make up. Because why else would Niall even propose the idea?

Harry wasn't sure if he wanted to tell Niall off or if he should just hang up. Harry was bothered that Niall even came up with such a ridiculous idea. It was nearing midnight and by the time they get there it'll be unforgivably early and Louis more than likely would be asleep. Other than that Harry had plans to sleep and you know, not see his boyfriend that he was upset with. You know the one that clearly isn't as affected by the break as everyone's told him.

"No, Niall. I don't." Harry replied sharply, as he tucked some of hsi hair behind his ear. "Why on Earth do you think I want to do such a thing?"

"Because you miss him. He misses you too." Niall stated and Harry wasn't sure if he honestly believed those words. "And I know you're still torn up over him and I just think this would be good."

"And for what? Because Louis' lonely sometimes and you feel sorry for him?" Harry could feel tears well up in his eyes thinking about all this. "I don't want to see him."

"But you do, Harry. I know you do because you haven't been happy. It's okay to miss your boyfriend even if you're still upset with him." Niall's words were affecting Harry and it sucked. It really fucking did because Harry was starting to reconsider his feelings towards everything Niall proposed. "And really he does miss you. Louis' texted me, asking how you've been because you won't even give him a chance to talk. He's even asked me if you're nervous about starting Uni soon."

Harry wiped the wetness in his eyes away with the back of his hand. Harry could feel his tattered heart just tearing even more. The thought of Louis wondering how he's feeling and if he's ready to head back to school made Harry emotional. Like, sure they've been on a break for a week now, but still didn't mean it hurt any less. This has been the longest Harry's went without talking with Louis since they've started dating. It's been awful.

"Just let me come get you and we'll go there, so you two can talk this out. Because I'm not about to let you guys break up if this keeps up." Niall said seriously and Harry could almost see Niall driving his way over. Not going to let Harry keep saying no anymore. "Besides I've got put some wear and tear on my car instead of collecting dust."

Right. Niall had gotten himself a car a few years ago from his dad. As a gift more so that's been pretty much stationary. Niall didn't have a job to pay for petrol and the fact it was only used for emergencies if anything. Harry thought Niall had lost his mind because the gas wasn't going to be cheap and Harry knew Niall didn't have much. Harry made a mental note in his mind to give Niall some money if he went.

If he went. Okay fine, maybe Harry should just go. Appease Niall and just get the explanation he deserved. To hear everything Louis had to say to him with the possibility of being good again. Who knew, maybe tomorrow morning he'd be a much happier person if all went well, so it could be a good venture.

"So are you in?" Niall questioned eagerly as Harry glanced back at his laptop.

"Yeah, fine. We can go." Harry relents as he started to feel his stomach harden at the thought of going to London.

"Awesome! I'll be there in five, best be ready." and then Niall hung up and what? Five minutes? That gave Harry barely anytime to freshen up and prepare for a road trip.

Then again, Harry was thankful he was still in his clothes from earlier, so that saved some time as he got to his feet and shut down his laptop. Moving to grab his lighter jacket from his wardrobe and after that popping into the bathroom to check his hair. Then grabbing his house key and writing out his mum a note that he went out again with Niall, should be home sometime tomorrow. Just wanting to ease her worries in case she woke up to Harry long gone. So After doing all that Niall had eventually showed up. Harry just slipped on his boots and locked the door on his way out.

This was going to be a long ride.

By the time they were an hour down the motorway, Harry was nettled by Niall's crummy music choices. Usually when trapped in a car with Niall, Harry was succumbed to his will and had to listen to pop music. But no, Niall apparently had a new found love of country music and the idea of jumping out of a moving vehicle sounded appealing. Especially if Harry had to listen to this for the whole damn ride.

"Can we please listen to something else? You know like, Hootie and the Blowfish or something?" Harry suggested as he glanced towards Niall who was focused on the road.

"But I'm the driver and it's an unspoken rule that I decide what we listen too. Everyone knows that." Niall explained and Harry just frowned as he crossed his arms. Great, now he had to listen to Niall's playlist for the next couple of hours on top of being tired. Harry better get a coffee out of all this because he wasn't so sure if he'd be a nice person come early morning. "Just sit back and enjoy the ride, Harry."

"How can I even enjoy myself when I have to listen to these sappy love songs? It's bad enough you're dragging me all the way to London in the middle of the night." Harry complained as his eyes fell back onto the road as it started to sprinkle.

"You seriously need to stop complaining so much. This is suppose to be fun, just us boys on the open road. Getting the love of your life back." Niall beamed and yeah, as if that didn't sound cliche enough as it was. Niall sounded like he got that from some cheesy movie and Harry wouldn't be surprised if he did.

"I better get breakfast out of all this."

"That's why we're going to stop for breakfast before we head to Louis', already one step ahead of you, H."

"And where exactly are we going to eat at four in the morning?" Harry would love to know. As long as he gets a coffee and some hot food, he'll feel better.

"McDonald's." Niall commented and well, at least it's better than nothing Harry supposed.

Most of the ride was quite boring and Harry for the life of him couldn't even sleep. Not when Niall was singing along to some George Strait's songs. Not when Harry's mind is jumbled mess because he had no clue what to even say to Louis. Harry could shut down and not say anything, just stand there like a fool, and Louis would wonder why he came. In a sense, Harry wanted to text Louis and ask him if it was okay, but Harry knew Louis was probably asleep. He wouldn't get up to check a text message, not at three in the morning. Louis loved his sleep and Harry just decided maybe it wasn't a good idea and went to the puzzle app on his phone to pass time.

At some point when Harry looked up he read London across the road sign. He could feel his mouth go dry and his heart palpitating quicker. Harry felt like he had an emptiness in the pit of his stomach at the thought of being so close.

Fuck. Can Harry even do this?

I don't even know if it really even matters to you, sings Faith Hill. Honestly, Harry could relate because in truth it still felt like Louis didn't even seem to care that much. No matter what Niall or Zayn had tried to tell him. If Louis truly wanted things to be alright he'd already came to fix it, not Harry. He shouldn't be the one going there begging for an apology.

Suddenly it dawned on Harry that this trip was an outright mistake. It was an incredibly idiotic decision is what it was. He didn't want to talk to Louis or see him. Harry wasn't ready. They needed to turn around because he couldn't do this, not anymore.

"Niall, turn around, please." Harry broke the silence between them as Niall was nodding along to 'It Matters to Me'. "I can't do this."

Niall cut the radio as he gave Harry a passing glance, confusion across his face. Still driving along like Harry hadn't just voiced their need to go back to Holmes Chapel.

"What do you mean? We're almost there, H." Niall said as if Harry didn't already know that.

"I just wanna go home, Niall. So please." Harry begged, but Niall kept driving along. Not pulling off to the the side or exiting off the motorway. "I'll pay you back and buy you breakfast later.."

Niall sighed. "Harry I'm not turning around, not until you I get your arse to Louis' flat. We came all the way here and you have to at least try."

Harry swallowed the hard lump in the back of his throat, fucking hell Niall was going to make Harry do this. "And what if he doesn't wanna see me, Niall? It would've been a waste of time."

"Don't say that, H. You know he'd love to have you there." Niall responded as the rain started to hammer against the windows of the car.

"Then why hasn't he come see me then?"

"You have to ask him that yourself, Harry. I don't know the answer to that. But I know for a fact he sure as hell would love to see you outside his door." Niall stressed and he peaked another glance at Harry. "Let's just stop and eat for a bit, maybe it'd calm your nerves before you see him."

"I already said I don't want to see him, Niall." Harry snapped, feeling wetness well up in his eyes. Harry wasn't trying to come across as a dick, but Harry needed to be back home. In the comfort of his nice warm bed away from getting his heart broken even more. Protected from the unknown. But Niall was being a stubborn bastard and wouldn't listen to Harry. Not that it came to any surprise.

"Can we just go back.. please?" Harry pleaded sadly, on the verge of tears because he was half nervous and half frustrated.

He could see the downcast expression across his best mate's face and it tinged at his heart a little.

"How about we stop for breakfast first?" Niall brought up. Honestly Harry wasn't even in the mood to eat, but maybe it'd get Niall to finally listen to Harry.

"Yeah, that's fine." Harry murmured as he glanced down back to the road, his heart thundered in his chest when Niall eventually pulled onto the slip road that was close by. Already in London and Harry felt like he was going to throw up.

When they stopped for their food, they tried to dodge the rain and not end up damp. Harry's hair got the wrath of it unfortunately, he felt like a sad wet dog. At least he had a nice cup of hot coffee and some food in his belly. Harry still felt quite ill about even being here and it was just festering the whole time they sat there. Not even Niall telling him to relax could make Harry feel any better. They were close to Louis' flat, not even ten minutes away. It was going on five o'clock and Harry could feel exhaustion slowly making its way known.

By the time that was all over they found themselves back in the confines of Niall's car, soaked head to toe. Harry was ready to head home, but Niall had other plans once it dawned on Harry where they were going.

"Niall, I already said-" Harry started to say, but Niall interjected.

"I know what you said, but I can't let you chicken out now, Harry." Niall was truly wanting a death wish. "We're like three minutes from his flat, so just take a deep breath and calm down." Harry wished he could just calm down. Harry didn't have that luxury of doing so, not when he's he had gotten tricked into going to Louis'. Like, Harry got it, Niall's just being a good friend and trying to push Harry out of his comfort zone. To do something instead of sulking and hoping for an apology. But what Niall doesn't understand is that Harry shouldn't be the one coming here, he's not the one who wanted this damn break anyway. Harry wasn't the one who said all those things that tore at his heart, Niall wasn't there. So, no, Harry couldn't just relax.

Harry just sat back and folded his arms across his chest, pouting as Niall turned back up the volume on the radio. Harry had decided right then and there he'd never go on a roadtrip with Niall again.

When they reach the car park of Louis' building, Harry felt like he was going to pass out. Felt frozen in place when Niall pulled into an empty spot and cut the engine. Harry's chest tightened when Niall got out of the car and came around Harry's side and opened the door for him.Waiting expectantly on Harry as he undid his seatbelt and carefully stepped out of the car.

Niall hadn't even given Harry a chance to smooth out his top as he grabbed Harry by the wrist and led him inside the building. Not even giving Harry a chance to see if Louis' car was even here. Honestly, Harry wanted to breakaway and run back to the car, walk back home if he has too. Harry wanted to trip and fall as he went up the stairwell as Niall led him, maybe then it'd avoid actually facing his boyfriend. Spraining his ankle sounded more desirable as they made it up the steps.

Then, Niall led Harry down the hall until they reached the third door on the right and had Harry stand in front of it. Letting go of his wrist and giving Harry a small go ahead nod.

Harry gnawed on his bottom lip for a moment as he brought up a fist but hesitated as he fluttered his eyes closed for a moment. Taking a deep breath before he pounded his fist against the door a few times.

Harry's insides felt like they were quivering the longer they stood there. God, it felt like time had slowed down and Harry was being tortured on purpose, as if he deserved this.

It felt like they were standing there for an eternity and Harry took it as a sign maybe Louis was still asleep anyway, that they should leave. But Niall decided he needed to knock too with a little more force and they waited... and waited.

"I think he might not be home, Harry." Niall came to the conclusion after two minutes pass. "He doesn't usually work on Saturdays, right?" Harry shook his head. "Do you want to call him?"

"No, can we just go then? I came like you wanted." Truthfully Harry felt kind of sad, yeah he was nervous about facing Louis and was rather relieved that he wasn't here. But, deep down Harry knew he was eager to see his boyfriend's beautiful face once again. To be near him and hear all the right things. It was kind of a bittersweet ending to the roadtrip.

"Okay, you make a fair point, I guess we can go." Niall gave in and Harry had confetti going off in his head. Balloons everywhere. "But at least you tried and 'm proud of you for that, H."

"Thanks, Nialler." Harry muttered out as they fell in step with one another and they headed back to the car.

The ride back to Holmes Chapel was decent; not a lot of talking as Harry had fallen asleep most of the ride back. Music was still ear bleedingly horrible as Niall had his playlist on repeat and let Harry tell you that was just torture. But it was a nice drive regardless.

Harry was eager to be back home and crawl into his nice warm bed. Hopeful to just lay down for a while instead of trying attempt such a task in this small cabin.

When Harry had gotten dropped off by Niall, he was quick to make his way inside and toed off his damp boots. Already making his way to the stairs, eager to change into dry clothes that weren't wet and cold. But before Harry could even think about it, Anne emerged from the kitchen with her hair tucked into a loose bun.

"Did you have a nice time with Niall, love?" Anne asked as she gave him one of her small smiles.

"I suppose, I'm quite knackered though, gonna go lay down, honestly." Harry said truthfully, his bed sounded better and better by the second. Ugh, he was so close.

"Must have had too much fun then, I'm glad. You were pretty upset when you came home last night. Happy you were safe about it too." Anne commented and Harry nodded. Right, fun. Yeah, that was exactly how Harry would describe that long haul he just had for nothing.

"Yeah, Niall always knows how to make things fun." It wasn't exactly a lie, Niall could be fun, depending on what he had planned. Just the ride to London and back wasn't something Harry would deem as exciting.

"Anyway, I'm glad you're home and I'm not going to bug you anymore because you look exhausted, honey." Anne commented and Harry was thankful for that. As much as he loved his mum's company, Harry just wanted to go cuddled up under his blankets. Listen to the rain ping against the window and try to get some much-needed sleep. Maybe he'd feel better, hopefully.

Harry gave his mum a tired smile as he started up the steps only to stop in his tracks when Anne piped up once again.

"Oh and Harry?" Anne said idly, Harry glanced over his shoulder at his mother. "Louis had stopped by an hour ago.."

Harry's heart stalled, "He did?" it came out quieter than Harry had intended.

"Yeah, he was looking for you, but you weren't here, and I wasn't sure when you'd be home. So he left." Anne explained and that's why Louis wasn't home. Now it all made sense.

"Oh... thanks, mum." Was all Harry could even say as he trudged his way up the rest of the stairs.

Slowly made his way back into his room down the quiet hall. Harry closed the door behind him and stripped out of his cold clothes. Then Harry crawled into bed then brought the blanket to his chest. Curling it closer to his chest and his mind nothing but a tragic emotional state.

Louis drove all the way here to see him, to talk to him, like Harry had done. Like they just couldn't get it right.

And Harry wondered if Louis missed him too.

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Two more chapters left!