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Azen already appeared in my dreams. It was like tripping into a deja vu where I seemed to recognize the place and how the circumstance would unfold, but somehow everything was too foreign. Like I was plunged into a scene without a script––a sense of alienation creeping in. I had always felt the constant tug-of-war in both supernatural and mortal worlds, but nowhere did I feel like I belonged enough. Too weak to be considered a werewolf but too odd to live as one with humans. Without Harvey and my mother, I wouldn't have trodden this tightrope between both worlds. Maybe Azen would resolve this confusion in exchange for the life I once had.

Once you enter, you can never go back. It echoed in my head, warning me of the leap we ought to take. I glanced back at the forest and imagined Mom standing there, hands clasped in front of her, and a smile plastered on her face. Her hair danced with the wind––a vision so vivid it almost felt real. I would give up Azen for her. I would've stayed if she asked me to. Does she want me to stay? Or does she want to get rid of the remainder of my father?

"This is not going to be easy for you," Harvey said as if he just read my mind. "So wherever you go, I'll go with you."

I stared back at the gate and forced a smile. "There's nowhere else to go but here."

The ground rumbled and the clank of metals filled the silence. Fog emerged from the other side of the gate when it parted, clouding the entire ground that looked like it was swallowing the earth. Tears almost blurred my vision when Harvey inched closer to me, his warmth diminishing the cold, eerie atmosphere that cloaked the forest. And for the first time again, I felt safe. The loud thud in my chest subsided. I was home.

"So, where's the chaperone?" I asked, barely seeing anything through the fog.

"Here." A bulb of light, as small as a butterfly, flew around our heads. Its wings had a tinge of fluorescent green, and its tail lit up like a torch.

As more of them appeared, the voice said, "They're the angels of Azen––the guardians gifted by the moon goddess. They will help you on your way to the kingdom."

A swarm of them swirled around us, creating a tornado-like shape until the light consumed our vision. Harvey held my hand when we stepped to the other side of the gate, afraid we might lose contact when we got transported to Azen. But just like that the butterflies dispersed. A jaw-dropping sight stood in front of us.

This didn't look like it belonged to the same world as the one we were used to; it painted a thousand glimpses of my dreams. Could this be real?

A waft of damp wind blew past my face, emitting the same scent as the forest soil. Cobbled pavements and narrow streets adorned the surroundings, alongside the towering castle-like buildings and dark stones. It looked like a theater play, us standing in the stadium but without the audience's gaze.

"Please tell me I'm not dreaming," I said in disbelief.

"This is pretty much real." Harvey sounded in awe. "I've never seen something so beautiful yet so menacing at the same time."

It was, in fact, eerie. Like there was an underlying darkness clawing the city. But maybe because it looked aged; or maybe the cracked stones seemed like they could fall apart, or maybe it was the fact that no mortal beings lived here. Everyone and everything could be powerful enough to devour us.

~*~

A car was assigned to drop us off at the Sebastians' house and drifted off as soon as we arrived. Despite the kingdom looking ancient and theatrical, the mix of modernization fascinated me. We weren't allowed to bring our mobile phones, instead, they replaced them with something that could only be used inside Azen––a keypad phone as small as a matchbox. It couldn't be used for anything else other than mere communication.

The Sebastians' house looked just like the one they had on the other side (human world); a mansion with sprawling, luscious grass in the front yard, trimmed bushes bordering the main entrance, and a wide garage that could fit as much as, if not more than, five cars. Harvey's parents had just recently moved into this kingdom, three days before we followed. Tomorrow night would be the Moonlight Ball, and we were just in time for the prestigious event.

Mrs. Sebastian greeted us in the foyer. She pecked my cheeks and Harvey placed a kiss on her head. The house was covered with a tinge of herbal and citrusy scent along with other spices that made my stomach churn.

"It's so nice to finally see you both together." She waltzed down the hall and beckoned us. "You're just in time for dinner."

Mrs. Sebastian always had that peculiar indifference in her tone every time she talked. Whether it be her husband, her son, or just about anyone. She wasn't much of a babbler, rather she seemed calculated in every conversation. Her silence, sometimes, I thought, was intimidating. I remember when she would scold Harvey, she wouldn't yell or resort to aggression. The coldness in her voice was enough to teach him a lesson. Her friendship with my mom remained a mystery to me; they were the opposites. Like it was the most spontaneous thing she'd done.

In the dining area, Harvey helped Mrs. Sebastian lift the turkey from the oven. She moved each platter of dishes to make room for the turkey, as Harvey placed it in the middle of one side of the table. I barely contained my hunger and almost heard my stomach grumble from the sight and aroma lingering in the air.

"Have a seat," she said, gesturing towards the empty chair. "I have important matters to discuss with you two."

We all settled on our seats, and I instantly fought the urge to grab food. I thought it was not ethical to consume while the host talked. But I guess I was being too proper. Maybe Mrs. Sebastian just made me nervous. If I were to stay with them, would this awkwardness happen often or would it subside?

"It's about that ball again, is it?" Harvey asked, cutting through the turkey and handing me a piece. "What if we don't find a mate during the event?"

"You will. It's going to be held at the palace so both of you need to look your best. You two must represent and introduce our pack to the whole kingdom so I expect nothing less." Then her gaze averted to Harvey before continuing, "Especially from you."

Harvey, who was chewing on his food, raised his brows and avoided Mrs. Sebastian's stare. His eyes landed on me, expectantly, waiting for my response on his behalf. But I'd been too cautious to step on whatever his parents decided for him; it was family matters, after all.

When silence filled the atmosphere, Harvey swallowed hard and asked, "Don't you think marriage is too soon?"

"Not in your case. Marriage means alliance, and alliance means security. In this kingdom, it is what we need the most. So I'll say marry well," she averted her attention to me, "the same goes for you."

"I don't think it will matter if I marry soon enough or not, Mrs. Sebastian." I sheepishly pulled my hands and clasped them under the table.

"It's what your mother wants, Ellie. She entrusted you to me."

But did I want to get married and be tied forever to someone I barely even knew? Would someone even accept me for my inadequacy? Goddess knew I wasn't supposed to bring something into existence bearing the same confusion that weighed me down my whole life. I'd be rational enough to spare them this suffering. Maybe we weren't obligated to consummate the marriage, were we? But as much as I hate to admit it, in a monarchical society, it was its currency.

"I don't think she would want me to do something against my will."

"Nonsense." She giggled. "She wants you to be happy. I'm sure plenty of men will ask for your hand. You're as beautiful as your mother."

"Mom, don't force Ellie into this. She'll attend the ball and that's it. It's still up to her," Harvey interfered when he noticed my discomfort.

"Okay," she muttered, leaning back against the chair. "You know, your father and I didn't get married until we were in our late twenties. But that was the time of the war, and we wished we had married sooner. I didn't even know I was a werewolf back then because of magic. Then I learned how to accept it. I don't think the same situation applies to everyone."

My anticipation for the event depleted, and it was replaced by an unexplainable worry. I'd looked forward to it, even prepared the dress I was going to wear or how I was going to act––an enthusiasm devoid of expectations.

~*~

After dinner, when we were cleaning up and washing the dishes, Mrs. Sebastian deviated from the Moonlight Ball topic and expressed her adoration for Azen instead. She pointed out how each pack had a specific contribution to the systematic whole of the kingdom, and how she wanted to carve our pack's name to its society to gain significance. It was quite ambitious if they would ask me, but they had Harvey to make that possible. I was unsure of how he felt about it, but he wasn't the type to be disobedient. He always made sure to cling to his parent's approval.

I had been sleep-deprived for the past few days because of the event. But this tossing and turning was different this time. The space in this room suddenly felt suffocating. I wished I could hear my mom's voice once more to tell me how to be happy and not worry about unbelonging.

I didn't force myself to sleep and just walked out of the room. The unlit hall made the warm light from Harvey's room cast outside. His door was slightly parted and the plucking of strings became more audible as I approached. A familiar song played, pulling me back from the time where I first heard it. The sea crashing against the shore; the bonfire lighting the night; and a serenade only I had the privilege to experience. There were only the two of us.

"My beautiful, beautiful moon," Harvey sang. "How you swoon me like no other."

Not wanting to ruin the song, I leaned against the doorframe with a smile on my face. He sat at the edge of his bed, his curly hair covering the side of his face, but I could still make out the gentle flutter of his eyes when he sang those lines.

As if he felt someone's presence, his hand dropped from his guitar and flicked his eyes at me.

"You still played that song after all these years," I said and couldn't keep the smile off my face. "It's as beautiful as the first time I heard it."

He looked away to hide the blush surging to his face and placed the guitar on the bed.

"I thought you were asleep."

"Good thing I wasn't or else I'll be missing that song."

He bit his bottom lip before looking back at me. "It's late. We have an event tomorrow."

"And you seem to be practicing," I teased, stepping inside the room and sitting beside him. "How do you feel about this whole situation?"

"I try not to think about it." He clasped his hands together and fidgeted. "But I also know that we're not kids anymore and responsibilities are going to catch up on us, no matter what."

"Well, I'm sure you'll make a perfect husband."

"How are you taking it?"

I took a deep breath. How should I be taking all of these?

"To be honest, I'm there for the champagne," I joked and he laughed at my response, lifting the tension a little.

"You're not going to get drunk at the ball." He placed his arm around me and stared at my eyes. "I'll take care of you from now on."

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