A/N: listening to scary love & sweater weather of The Neighbourhood and apocalypse by Cigarette After Sex while writing this chapter. 

Mah heart. My poor heart.

Chapter 30:  scary love

COOLER

I chugged down the absinthe, closing my eyes as the alcohol ran down my throat. I let out a sigh before filling my glass once again. I usually enjoyed it in a Parisian style, savoring the sweet, diluted taste, but what I needed now was severe intoxication. I watched the green liquor in the glass, swirling around like a pretty potion.

Bodies were everywhere, dancing to the loud music thumping at my feet. Chatters filled the place, ngunit tila nasa kweba ang pandinig ko.

The bartender was kind to help me with my drink, but he was also kind enough to let me have the whole bottle. That or either I had a gun or handed him some cash.

Not quite sure though.

Naramdaman kong may umupo sa bakanteng stool sa tabi ko, but I wasted no time checking who it was.

A gun was put by my side, ngunit kasunod na nilapag niyon ay ang mga bala. The bartenders and other people at the bar panicked at bahagyang lumayo, letting their guard up as the guy beside me ordered a drink.

"Zeus," wika ng boses. "What's with the dressed ear?" Kahit siguro tuluyang mabingi ang kaliwang tainga ko, I could still hear him chew his gum so loud and annoying.

"What do you want, Ace?" tanong ko sa kanya.

He laughed as he took his whatever alcohol it was; I didn't really care. "Why are you drinking? Is that to grieve or celebrate? Well, considering you pretty much did nothing during the transaction with my Uncle and Achilles, malabong umiinom ka para mag-celebrate."

The absinthe was hitting me, that it makes me want to hit him as well. Kilala ko si Ace; he's much all talk and no walk. Kung patulan ko man siya, wala akong mapapala.

"What, no comebacks, Vander?" patuloy niya.

I opted to ignore him at sinubukang uminom ngunit inagaw iyon ni Ace mula sa akin. He took it straight, making loud, annoying throat noise.

He spat the alcohol. "Even your alcohol choice is bad, what the fuck, Zeus?"

I stared at my gloved hand. If I punch him right now, I'd get his blood or sweat on my hand, which is gross, so how about no?

Sumenyas ako sa bartender para humingi ng isang baso, then Ace suddenly got angry because I ignored him.

He pulled out a gun from god knows where he kept it other than the one he put on the side. He started firing at every corner of the bar, dahilan upang magsigawan ang naroon. In less than five minutes, the dance floor was cleared.

Hindi ko siya pinag-aksayahan ng oras. I continued drinking, recalling my schedule for the next three days.

Ace suddenly grabbed me from my seat, pinning me to the bar and pointing the gun at my head.

"Alam kong mayabang ka na noon pa man, pero mula yata ng nawala si Cronus ay dumoble ang yabang mo, as if you have done anything great!" He gritted through his teeth. He was so worked up, but hey, a can is noisy when it is empty.

I'm too tired to give him a fight, kaya inalis ko ang pagkakahawak niya sa damit ko, pushing him aggressively, ngunit hindi siya natinag.

My last resort was to slam his head with the bottle of absinthe. I swear watching the green liquid run down his head, with strobe lights all over the place, screams aesthetic.

"What the fuck?!" sigaw niya.

Shame, I thought that knocked him down. So absinthe bottles are not that hard, and they don't come in handy. Noted.

He rushed towards me, ngunit isang hakbang pa lamang ay may kumasa ng baril sa gilid niya.

My reaper, Poseidon.

Ace grinned like a madman. Isang pitik lamang niya ay napalibutan kami ng mga tao niya, lahat ay armado. Napabuga ako ng hangin, feeling the onset of a headache.

I started cracking my knuckles before counting his men.

Eight—nine, if we include Ace.

Bumaling ako kay Poseidon. "Do you think we can wrap up in ten minutes?"

He shook his head. "No, ten is too long. I can do it in less than five minutes."

Tumawa si Ace. "Sa tingin niyo ay madadala kami sa mga salita ninyo? Come on Zeus, remember you hit me first."

Did I?

Don't care.

Tinupi ko ang manggas ng suot at sinipat ang oras. It's almost eleven, and my girlfriend is probably preparing to leave as her shift ends in thirty minutes.

Great, I have much time.

"You can have them all, Poseidon," paalam ko at akmang tatalikod, completely ignoring Ace na kanina pa dada nang dada. But then he said something that totally caught my attention.

"Leaving too soon, Zeus? Why, to pick up your hoe?"

I froze. Did he just call my girlfriend a hoe?

"What did you just say?"

Nakakalokong ngumisi si Ace. "Now I have your attention."

The bar has gone quiet by now dahil naglabasan na halos lahat, in fear of getting caught in the trouble.

"Bawiin mo ang sinabi mo." My voice roared.

"Which one? About you doing nothing for the business or about picking up your hoe?"

Ah, Rustia wouldn't like me getting in trouble. I can't get a wound, a bruise, more so a bullet through my skin because she will worry.

I fished my black fingerless glove from my back pocket, wearing it on my hand. I could get his blood here, and I can just toss this away.

"Wait, alam ba niya ang tungkol kay Erebus?" Ace grinned, referring to Rustia's dad, and Cronus' late friend. "Ah, I missed him. Sa tuwing may transaksiyon at kasama siya ay nagpapakitanggilas siya sa kanyang mga magic tricks. But he performed his last magic, six year. An escaped gone wrong. Terribly wrong."

Six years ago wasn't that long ago, but I didn't have many memories of the man. Nag-aral ako sa ibang bansa, and I was a nobody six years ago, other than being the son of the great and mighty Cronus.

"Shut your mouth, Ace."

He grinned even more. "Teka, ikaw ba alam mo bang ginagamit ka lamang niya, so they could know where the money is?"

I could really punch him right now. "Shut your fucking mouth!"

"Oh, bakit sa akin ka nagagalit at hindi sa..." He quoted in the air. "...girlfriend mo? Zeus, women like her don't need a what, good-looking and loving boyfriend?" Tumawa siya. "Yeah, you're all that pero alam mo kung ano ang mas importante sa kanila? Pera. Women like her open their legs to anyone with money—"

I picked up the remnants of the broken absinthe bottle and shoved it into his mouth. His men were either slow or stupid, and none of them reacted in the next few seconds, hanggang sa isa-isa silang natumba dahil sa tama ng baril mula sa kung saang sulok ng bar. Poseidon took care of the remaining standing goons hanggang sa lahat sila ay natumba.

"You're slow!" Poseidon shouted.

Mula sa malayong sulok ay narinig ko ang boses ni Artemis. "Shut up, Poseidon." She blew on the nozzle of her gun before sliding down the railings and skipping her way towards us.

"Ha...yopf...ka...Zeus..." Ace started spitting blood on the floor, knuckles closing in anger. "P..agbaba...ya..ran...mo 'to...."

Lumuhod si Artemis sa harapan niya at inangat ang kanyang duguang baba. "Wow, you'll be just like Joker when this heals."

"Ha...yopfff....ka...yoo!" He coughed and spat blood even more.

"Shh shhh, you're as good as dead, so shut up," Artemis said. " Dead men can't talk." Tumayo siya at hinampas si Ace sa batok, causing him to pass out. Bumaling siya sa akin na puno ng pag-aalala ang mukha. "Ayos ka lang? Kilala mo si Ace, he runs his mouth on whatever nonsense—"

I I cut her off. "Lock this whole place and burn it down to ashes."

R Nagkatinginan silang dalawa ni Poseidon, and none of them opposed me.

"I gotta go," sabi ko at tinalikuran sila. Lumabas ako ng bar, only to be welcomed by the heavy rain.

Shit, Rustia probably didn't bring an umbrella with her. Mas lumakas pa ang ulan ngunit wala akong pakialam. I walked towards where my car was parked, slipping inside.

Pagkapasok ko sa loob ay hindi ko na masyadong naririnig ang malakas na ulan. Pinanood ko ang malalaking butil mula sa windshield, the sound drowning out in my ear. The windows around me turned blurry as it continued to pour.

I peeled the gloves off my hands and tossed them somewhere. I shook the water from my hair, grabbing a hand towel from the backseat at pinunasan ang sarili. A flash of lightning crossed the sky as I started the engine. Kasunod niyon ay ang mahinang kulog.

I drove like I was in a race and before I knew it, nasa harap na ako ng convenience store kung saan nagtatrabaho si Rustia. The rain was pouring even more, and there was lightning and thunder every once in a while.

Mula sa kotse ay tanaw ko siyang nakikipag-usap sa mga kasamahan niya. She had her bag with her, probably on her way home and waiting for the rain to calm the fuck down.

Bumaba ako ng sasakyan, walang pakialam sa malakas na buhos ng ulan. I walked towards the back compartment to get an umbrella for my girlfriend. Inilabas ko ang dilaw na payong at pasimpleng naglakad papunta sa entrance ng convenience store. One of her workmates noticed me, kaya napalingon si Rustia sa akin.

Sinalubong niya ako ng ngiti ngunit may pag-aalala pa rin sa kanyang mukha. I love that look on her. It was like she had so many emotions for me and it makes me feel better.

"Cooler? Bakit basa ka, hindi ka ba gumamit ng payong?" tanong niya at bahagyang kumunot ang ilong. "Nakainom ka?"

I handed her the umbrella. "It's for you."

Marahil ay nabasa niya ang kaseryosohan sa mukha ko. She stared at me for a while before sighing and turning to her workmates to wave them goodbye.

Nang lumabas kami ay tila mas lalo lamang lumakas ang kulog at kidlat. I watched the rain pelting on the concrete. Nang buksan niya ang payong ay nauna akong maglakad patungo sa sasakyan, opening the door for her.

Kahit basa na ako ay humakbang siya palapit, so she can share the umbrella with me. "Cooler, may problema ba?"

"No," sagot ko. Tiningnan niya ako nang matagal kaya napabuntong-hininga ako. "We'll talk later."

She agreed to it at pumasok na lamang sa sasakyan. I could feel her gaze at me as I walked to the other side of the car and slipped into the driver's seat. Tahimik na binuhay ko ang makina at nagsimulang magmaneho patungo sa apartment niya. We were silent the whole short ride at nang makarating kami sa labas ng apartment niya ay muli akong naunang lumabas upang pagbuksan siya ng pinto.

"Cooler..."

Bumaba siya at sinubukang ipasukob ako sa payong ngunit nang wala akong reaksiyon ay binitawan niya ang payong.

"You'll get sick," sabi ko sa kanya, shutting the door behind her at akmang pulutin ang payong ngunit bigla siyang napahagulhol.

"Don't do this to me, Cooler. What did I do? Sabihin mo sa akin, huwag ganito, please?" She started sobbing but her tears were joined by the raindrops.

Oh shit. I made her cry.

Lightning scorched the sky once again, followed by the rolling thunder. Sa tuwing kukulog ay napapapiksi siya, but she was determined to stand in the rain.

I reached for her cheeks, feeling the warmth of her tears. "No, baby. It's not you—"

"Tangina naman, Cooler."

I brushed my fingers through my hair. "Sorry, I'm just upset."

"Because of me?"

"No, no baby. Why would I be upset with you—"

"Cooler..."

Hinawakan ko ang kamay niya ngunit napapapiksi lamang siya. "Let's get inside, I don't want you to get sick." I ran the drenched hair out of her face ngunit agad niyang iniwas ang mukha.

"Please, tell me."

I sighed. "I'm just upset someone called you a hoe, and then told me some things I knew weren't true."

Napaawang ang kanyang labi. Her face was so full of emotions right now and honestly, it was so good to see her like that. I wanted to see her feel so many emotions for me, kahit ano pa iyon.

"What things?" tanong niya.

I shook my head. "It doesn't matter."

"Cooler..."

Lightning crossed the sky again kaya napatingala ako bago sumagot. "Just nonsense lies like how you're only using me to know where the lost money is."

Nawala lahat ng kulay sa kanyang mukha, and I watched her lips quiver in either sob or coldness of the rain. Mapait na ngumiti siya.

"Y-yeah, those were nonsense lies..." she said, looking down. Inabot niya ang dalawang kamay ko at hinawakan iyon. "Pero... may aaminin ako sa'yo."

We're both soaking wet, our skin feeling the touch of pelting rain.

"Sa umpisa ay... gusto ko lang talagang makipaglapit sa'yo para malaman kung nasaan ang labing tatlong bilyon..." She sobbed between her words.

My head was light, probably because of the absinthe or her confession. "Pero... totoo ang nararamdaman ko sa'yo. I like you for real to the point na nakalimutan ko na ang pakay ko, dahil totoong gusto kita."

It felt like I was punched on both cheeks. The alcohol left my system right at that moment because my mind seemed so clear as day.

I smiled. "No, that's not true."

She sobbed even more. What the fuck did I do? "Iyon ang totoo, C-cooler."

I laughed. "No, it's not."

She sobbed in her palm and faced me with shaking lips. "Pero hindi ko alam na tuluyang akong mahuhulog sa'yo, hanggang sa puntong nakalimutan ko na ang tungkol doon. Who cares about the money? Wala rin akong mapapala kung ipaghihiganti ko si Tatay. It... it all slipped off my mind dahil ikaw na lamang ang nasa isipan ko, and I forgot all about it."

I smiled bitterly. These things don't make sense to me. And when I get so confused about many things, I tend to ruin lives. Oh no, someone's life is gonna be ruined.

Not mine.

Not hers.

She sniffled, stepping towards me. "Cooler..."

"Ssshh, it's okay, babe. You don't have to worry about it," sabi ko sa kanya. "Here's what you're gonna do. Get inside, take a quick shower, and rest. You can't be sick, it's not pleasant to be sick."

Horror crossed her face. "Cooler, anong gagawin mo?"

I shrugged, the same time another lightning bolt rolled across the sky. "I don't know. I'll figure it out later."

I can't tell her I can go berserk on anything right now; it can help me calm. I can also go ruin lives, but she doesn't need to know that.

"Cooler, magalit ka sa akin. Don't be like that. Y-you're scaring me..." pag-amin niya.

Oh.

"Sorry, babe."

That just worsened it. "Cooler, please..."

Hindi ko namalayang nakakuyom pala ang mga kamay ko, until she held my hand, pressing it a bit to calm me.

"It's okay, babe. I love you so much I'm willing to do anything for you, didn't I tell you that?" Lumapit ako sa kanya at inalis ang basang buhok sa mukha niya.

"S-sasabihin ko naman talaga sa'yo, naghahanap lang ako ng tempo," she said. "Please..."

"Shhh, it's okay, babe." Ngumiti ako. "I know how you felt, at gaya mo, I also have skeletons in the closet I'm still trying to find the timing so I can tell you about them. I mean, your ulterior motive in getting close with me is the money? Ano lang ba iyan kumpara sa mga tinatago ko sa'yo. What's worse than a few dead bodies? Gun smuggling worth millions? Arson and torture? Bribery and sometimes human trafficking? See, kung ano man ang tinatago mo, it's nothing compared to what I'm keeping from you."

Pinahid niya ang mga luha at patak ng ulan sa mukha. "P*tangina naman, Cooler! Hindi ito paligsahan."

I laughed, reaching for a tight hug. I may have overdone it because I heard her groan. "I love you, you could do anything and get away with it so you don't have to worry."

She sobbed even more. What the fuck, bakit ko pinapaiyak ang girlfriend ko? I'm the worst.

I tried shushing her but it was such a bad idea dahil mas lalo lamang siyang naiyak. I lifted her chin with my fingers and made her face me. "I love you so much, you can fucking take all that I am and all that I have. I love you so much you can even kill me right now and I'll be the one to hand you the gun—"

Inilagay niya ang palad sa bibig ko, to stop me from saying more. "Y-you're scaring me."

Kinalma ko ang sarili at dahan-dahang inalis ang kamay niya sa bibig ko. I brought it to my lips and started planting tiny kisses on her wrist. "Bakit ka natatakot sa akin?"

I nibbled on it like a little hungry baby. I bit the spot where I nibbled, trying to soothe it but only making it worse. A dark red mark was left on her wrist, so I started nibbling again on other free spots.

Napapikit siya at patuloy na umiyak, or was it all rain? Well, I can know by tasting.

I leaned forward and lips touching her cheek. She stilled, halting her breath for a moment. I licked my lips, savoring the salty tears taste.

Yup, she's crying.

Dahan-dahan akong lumapit sa kanya, and I can hear the heavy breathing between us despite the rolling thunder and my depleting hearing.

Bumaba ang tingin ko sa katawan niya. She was slightly shivering, but other than that, I noticed how her wet shirt hugged the curves of her body. I watched the rain roll down her skin, and I somewhat wished to be a raindrop right now.

I noticed how she was small but her curves were in the right places. Ibinalik ko ang mga mata sa kanyang mukha, only to meet her teary eyes staring at me as well with unreadable emotions in them. Sa pagkakataong ito mas lumiit ang espasyo sa pagitan namin nang humakbang siya palapit.

I breathed slowly, my eyes not leaving hers. Nangungusap ang kanyang mga mata, it was like she was telling me to kiss her ngunit siya na mismo ang tumingkayad upang gawaran ako ng halik. I was quick to look away, not letting her lips touch mine.

Namula ang kanyang mukha, at tila nagtatanong ang kanyang mga mata.

I shook my head. "You can't kiss me, I lied at great extremes." I was holding back, afraid she would hate me.

She licked her lower lip. "Then what's better than two lying lips kissing?"

She suddenly lurched forward, crossing the space between us. I immediately responded, letting all my pain and frustration flow into that kiss. Her lips were soft, heavenly, and I could spend hours nibbling on them but still can't get enough. I parted her lips with my tongue at sinakop ang kanyang bibig. I was kissing, tugging, and tasting her lips.

My hands slid down to the side of her body, and she fell back and leaned on the car's door. I pressed my hips into her, groaning at the pressure. The sky was in chaos, the streetlights flickered and went out, plunging us into darkness. But despite the darknss, I can feel everything with great intensity. Her arms encircled around my neck, responding to my kisses with equal fervor.

My hands slid off the back of her thighs, and a little moan escaped her lips. I rolled my hips into her once again, gripping the back of her thighs.

Madilim ang paligid nang buksan ko ang mga mata nang maputol ang halik namin.

"L-let's go inside?" she asked.

I didn't answer; instead, I grabbed her wrist, almost dragging her with my tight grip papasok sa gate ng kanyang apartment.

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