Life is often analogised to a merry-go-round. Some individuals sit alone, while others hold on tight to those dearest. We're sometimes surrounded by shrieks of delight and other times by cries of trepidation. It's our choice whether to clamp our eyes shut to the opportunities around us as we attune to the whirr of the world passing us by. Until we arrive at our screeching halt.

And today would mark the end of Indiya's ride.

Dark silhouettes entered the building as the thunder bellowed its promise of rain, ensuring a sombre ambience to accompany the day. The sky was slate-grey, save for the sepia hues that chaperoned each boom of thunder.

Blaine began to feel the soreness encroaching where Ria had grasped far too tight onto his forearm. Initially, they'd held hands, but now her nails gripped into the flesh of his skin where he'd rolled up his sleeves. Blaine didn't mind, really; strangely, the sensation grounded him. He glanced down at her, and each time he did so, her eyes remained etched on the wooden rectangular coffin that would now be Indiya's new home.

"Ria?" Ms Tengku chimed from the pew directly in front of them, but Ria hadn't appeared to hear the older woman. The six-sided box was the exclusive recipient of her attention.

Blaine poked her shoulder gently. "Ri? I think Indiya's mum wants to speak to you." He whispered against her ear, his finger flicking against a wave of hair that had fled Ria's bun and resided against her cheek.

"Oh." Ria struggled to avert her gaze away from the casket. "Sorry...I didn't hear you." She propelled her lips into an upward curve, hoping it would emulate a somewhat convincing smile.

"I know it's a little last minute, but I was wondering whether you'd be okay to say a few words about Indiya when the time comes in the service." Ms Tengku implored, her apprehension tangible from how her fingers skirted over the hem of her dress several times. "I'd written some words myself...but I don't...I don't think I can get up and do it. I don't think I'd do her justice."

"I don't know," Ria mumbled in response. Still, the woman's disconsolate countenance, the tears bubbling in her eyes, threatening to slip, led to her reconsidering her following words. "Okay. I'll try."

"You don't have to do it if you're not comfortable. You can always change your mind. You can say no, Ria." Blaine reassured her once Ms Tengku had turned around to face the front of the ceremony hall. She nodded slowly, diverting to her right side where Reid sat, tightly clutching her hand. Things hadn't miraculously resolved between the siblings, but oddly enough, Indiya's passing had brought them together. Perhaps that had been Indiya's parting gift to the remaining Aslans. The fact that Reid had stuck to his decision to depart shortly after the funeral may have been a contributing factor too.

Like Ria, Reid struggled to yank his eyes away from the coffin. He could hear the echoing of the civil celebrant in the background as he introduced himself and Indiya's family and read out biblical verses. The last funeral they'd attended had been their father's. It had been full of despair, sorrow and sheer anguish. Yet today held a different feel for him.

Because despite the sweet sorrow and raw suffering, a part of Indiya would always live on within him. He'd made many mistakes that he'd have to spend the remainder of his life atoning for, but he'd loved her once, which made him a luckier man than most.

All lost in their trail of unrelenting thoughts, they'd scarcely heard the civil celebrant endeavour to usher Ria onto the stage to give her eulogy.

"Ria?" Reid called out, and Ria could just about fathom Hazel's voice calling her in the background. She shifted to her brother as he nodded towards the stage, signalling that it was time to say a few words.

"Oh, right." She muttered, feeling Blaine's hands squeeze her thigh in an attempt to comfort the girl. On her trek toward the podium, she lurched slightly, catching herself swiftly as she felt the stares boring deep into her soul.

She released a discomfiting cough as she took centre behind the podium, her arms resting against the hard, wooden surface to stabilise herself. She peered over the microphone, seeing several dozen pairs of eyes gaping back at her; only a handful were familiar faces. She instantaneously sought out Blaine and Reid, both boys offering her encouraging smiles. Beside Blaine sat Hazel, who placed her hands in a double thumbs-up. Towards the back of the pews sat Lydia, her bleach-blonde hair tied up scruffily and her face devoid of any product. She lowered herself to her seat, her hand jumping up to cover her face. Ria couldn't resist the smile that played across her lips at Lydia's actions.

"Um, Hi." Ria started. "My name is Ria, and I'm a friend of Indiya's." The words stumbled out with little grace; her words were barely audible to her over the fierce drumming in her ears.

She moistened her lips with her tongue as her attention drew to an older male standing at the back of the hall, his head cocked to the side as he seemed to ogle her. His eyes were the exact colour of tree leaves; she'd never seen eyes so sonorous, glossy, and unnatural. His hair was almost pitch-black except for a couple of tainting white strands. Although several vacant seats were available, he leaned against the wall, his knee bent, holding him still in place. The intensity of his eyes rendered her uneasy, so she lowered her gaze back to the podium.

"Indiya was...she erm..," She halted her speech, her mind suddenly so blank that she could almost hear a buzzing white noise. The only memories of Indiya she could conjure up were recent and rather unpleasant.

Her eyes fell back to Blaine as he mouthed a 'you're doing great,' to which she beamed. She took a sharp inhalation to stabilise her thoughts, the coffin next to the podium calling out to her again. "Actually, Indiya always said she hated elevators because of their size. She'd always take the stairs, so I think she'd hate being in there." A small laugh exited between her lips, but she ceased as she noticed the stunned faces in front of her. "I'm sorry. That was a really silly thing to say. I--I'm sorry. I don't think I can do this. I can't think of the right thing to say. I'm sorry." Ria hadn't wanted to cry today, but she was almost blubbering. She had thought she'd wept enough in the last week since Indiya's suicide; she was astonished she even had enough liquid in her body to produce tears.

She hadn't heard any stirring, but Blaine stood beside her when she opened her eyes. He shook his head, his fingertips wiping away the remaining tears from her eyes. She was only acutely aware that they had an audience. "Don't apologise, Ria. We'll do this together, yeah?" He whispered.

"Yeah." She whimpered out the reply. She felt his hand gliding over her arm until his fingers entwined hers. The action was effortless; no need to readjust to make the interlinking of fingers more comfortable. She glimpsed up at him and recalled being stupidly obstinate about a no-strings-attached relationship only months earlier. Because right now, she wanted nothing more than to tie him into her life in every way possible.

"Hi. I'm Blaine, and I'm also a friend of Indiya's. I haven't actually prepared anything, and I'm not the best with words, so bear with me." He arched his neck to speak into the microphone, his voice far more assertive than Ria's, but the moistness in his palm foretold his nerves. "Indiya was...she was a really special person to so many people. She was a daughter, a friend, a sister, a colleague...and more." Blaine's eyes breezed past Reid at the final part of his sentence. "I think the fact that I don't know half of you here is a testament to how many people Indiya impacted in her life."

He glanced down at the floor, his knee jittering behind the podium. "Umm, I met Indiya back in sixth form. She was actually a year younger than me, which is pretty funny because she was definitely the wiser of the two of us most of the time." He exhaled a little laugh, and Ria could almost see the steam seeping out from his ears as he desperately wracked his brain for what to say next. "I'd like to say we became friends immediately, but that wasn't the case. We actually ran in very different circles. I became friends with her because she started dating my friend. She actually tutored him after school because he was failing math. Reid doesn't really like people knowing that, so she would always tell everyone a different story of how we all first became friends." Reid laughed in the audience, his hand snaking out to swab below his nose, and Ria could tell he was crying.

"I'm very thankful for having someone like Indiya in my life. She changed its trajectory in many ways. She truly cared about people - sometimes more than she cared for herself. I mean, she was going to be a doctor, and she would've been a great one, I'm sure.

"Indiya was a massive believer in love. Everyone talks about hopeless romantics, but I don't think I truly understood what it meant until I met her. She believed in this one true love and wanted that for everyone, not just herself. I thought it was so daft; I used to tell her to get a grip when we were teenagers. But Indiya was definitely onto something." He swerved onto his side as he gazed down at Ria. "I can honestly say if it wasn't for Indiya, I might not have realised my feelings for the woman I love until much later." He felt Ria's grip tighten against his own; he thought he could feel her heartbeat through her hand against his palm.

He pivoted toward the microphone. "Maybe that's why it's difficult to understand why Indiya made the choice she did. Why did someone who believed so much in unconditional love not quite realise how loved she was? I've spoken to a few of you here earlier today. And no one's quite said those words about why Indiya really isn't here today." A moment of silence passed, the air slick with anticipation, almost as though everyone in the room had held their breaths simultaneously.

"Indiya took her own life on December the twentieth two thousand and twenty-two because she was depressed. That's something we're all going to have to get used to saying. Life is made of choices upon choices, and that's the choice that Indiya made that night. And it's not fair that her depression lied to her and made her believe she was unlovable or didn't matter. It's not fair that her depression took away her chance to meet the love of her life, have a family one day, and have the career she wanted. It's not fair." His voice broke with the final syllable, and Ria glanced up, seeing a solitary tear slide down his cheek, almost simultaneously as her own. She wanted to lean over and kiss his pain away, but before she did, he resumed.

"Depression lies, so we have to tell the truth. I know lots of us here probably blame ourselves for what happened to Indiya. But the truth is it's no one's fault. Not ours, and not Indiya's. And Indiya, if you're listening now, I want you to know the truth: we love you so much. And our lives will be duller without you. But I promise to be a little more like you and love entirely with my whole heart until my last breath because I know that's what you would've wanted." He grinned down at Ria before releasing a breath. "I think I've spoken more than enough now." That earned several laughs from the guests.

A single clap was heard from the seats below, and Ms Tengku hailed up, her hands clasped tightly together as she gazed up at the podium. "Thank you, Blaine. That was...lovely." She tilted her head up towards the ceiling through blurred eyes. "I love you so much, my Indiya."

---------------------------------------------------

Later that afternoon, Ria and Hazel agreed to return to the house earlier than the guests to ensure the arrangements were ready.

Ms Tengku had wanted a small, intimate gathering following the funeral. She'd enquired for it to be held at the Aslan house as she wasn't quite ready to make her return home yet.

Currently, Ria resided on the floor, desperately trying and, subsequently, failing to reassemble a large IKEA table. In contrast, Hazel lay sprawled upon the couch, her head nestled into the pillow, an occasional sob echoing around the room.

"Hazel, I know it's hard right now, but we need to get this sorted before everyone gets here. Can you help me?"

"I can't. I'm grieving right now." She sniffled, her nose beet red from where the fibres of the tissues had aggravated her skin.

"Just hold the table legs for like five seconds?" She glared up at the girl. "Please?!"

"Why don't you ask your boyfriend?" Hazel cruised off the sofa, reluctantly kneeling beside the girl. "I hear he's good at erecting a thing or two."

"Blaine's not even here!" She snapped in return. She hailed up, endeavouring to attach the tabletop to the legs. Still, from her peripheral field, she spotted the man with the glossy green eyes standing beside a car outside the house. "Holy shit!"

What?!" Hazel responded, tracking Ria's gaze outside. "Who's that?"

"He was at the funeral. He kept staring during the eulogy. If he's invited to the wake, I'm guessing he's a friend of Indiya's."

"A friend of Indiya's? He's literally in his fourties!" Hazel retaliated. "Plus, we don't know if he was invited; he could be a creep who followed us back here."

"Maybe I could go and ask him. It's broad daylight. What could happen?" Ria strolled toward the front door.

"Hell no, Ria! This is how you get killed! And if you get killed, then I get killed because Reid and Blaine will beat my ass if anything happens to you." Hazel raced behind her, but Ria was already stepping onto the front lawn.

"Excuse me?" She hollered, but he began to amble away once he heard her voice. "Where are you going? You were at the funeral, weren't you? Were you a friend of Indiya's? Family?"

He halted then, his larynx bobbing visibly as he gulped hard. "How's Sihem?" His words caused Ria to stumble back; she could feel Hazel's nails digging into her upper arms from behind her. "I'm not stalking you or anything. You look like her."

"How do you know her?"

"I don't. Not really." He replied honestly. "I didn't even know she had kids."

"You still haven't explained why you were at the funeral." Ria stuttered, but she wasn't even sure she wanted answers any longer.

"Ria, let's just leave it. He's clearly just a creep." Hazel insisted, the distraction enabling the man to scamper away from the house.

"Ria? Hazel?" Lydia's words reverberated behind them; their backs still turned from the house.

Hazel blinked a couple of times, remembering that the wake would begin in the next twenty minutes. "Hi, Lydia. Thanks for coming." She patted Ria's shoulders, urging her to swerve around.

"You sound surprised. Of course, I was going to come. I like Indiya." Her expression softened as she backtracked. "I liked Indiya, I mean. She was a good person. At the wedding, when I told Reid not to go to her, I had no idea...I didn't know how bad things were."

Ria nodded slowly, shoving the previous events to the back of her mind. "For what it's worth, I am sorry about what happened between you and Reid. You deserved better."

Lydia simpered, dipping her fingers into her pocket before holding her palm out to expose the engagement ring. "Give this back to him."

Ria tipped her head back, exhaling a sigh. "Lydia, Reid got that ring for you. It's yours. You don't have to give it back even if you're not together anymore."

"I don't know if it ever belonged to me. I think it might've been Indiya's all along."

"That's not true, and you know it. They probably wouldn't work out in the long term anyway."

"Maybe not. But you said it yourself; I was a rebound. It could've been any other girl he liked the look of that night in the club. I was just the first to catch his attention." Lydia resigned.

Ria shook her head. "Reid did care about you. That might be difficult to believe now...but Reid did love you. Don't hate him, Lydia. And take this back. It's yours. Give it to charity or pawn it if you don't want it."

"I don't hate him. I don't think he's a bad person. But I think he doesn't know what he wants. And he shouldn't waste people's time if he doesn't know what he wants."

"That's fair." Ria agreed.

Lydia reluctantly hauled the ring into her pocket. "I hope we can be friends too, Ria. I'm genuinely sorry for how I treated you in school. And how I treated you at the beginning of my and Reid's relationship. Knowing that his ex was so close to the family and I was the outsider who would never measure up to her was difficult. That's not an excuse to have asked her to be a bridesmaid or to be horrible to you, but I felt excluded. I hope you can find it in you to forgive me one day."

"There's nothing to forgive anymore, Lydia," Ria admitted, and to her stupefaction, Lydia inclined forward, embracing the girl in a hug.

"Thank you, Ria. I'm going to head off. I'm not quite ready to pretend anything's okay with Reid just yet." She admitted. "Plus, I have a heck of a lot of paperwork for the annulment." She rolled her eyes and strolled off, glancing over her shoulder for a split second. "Hold onto Blaine, Ria. He's crazy about you. Most people only dream about a love like that."

"I will." She whispered as the girl sauntered away. She turned to Hazel, nudging her slightly. "Come on, let's get that table sorted before people really turn up."

Minutes later, the doorbell rang, and the guests poured in. Ria waited until she recognised Blaine's familiar head of dark curls. She wrapped her arms around him the moment he came into frame, tiptoeing and pressing her lips to each cheek before settling a final kiss upon his lips. "Thank you, Blaine."

He chuckled heartily against her lips. Once she pulled away from him, he was left feeling far too cold, as though ice bubbled in his veins, and only she was the one to melt the cold away. "What for?"

"Are you serious? I thought I was going to crash and burn until you stepped in. You saved my ass out there! I owe you." Her hands threaded through his thick, lustrous mane before she settled her fingers on his cheeks and tugged him back to her lips.

"You don't owe me anything, Ria. It gave me a chance to say goodbye to Indiya, too. And I'd do it again even though I've always shitted myself when I've had to give a presentation." He replied, his lips still pressed against hers; his tongue tasted like milk, honey and love as it rolled over hers.

"I know. I can still feel your sweaty hand." She quipped back, rubbing her palm against her slacks mockingly. She felt his tooth graze against her bottom lip, leaving her with a slightly sore yet welcome reminder of his touch. "But I've already got an idea for how I can make it up to you."

"Oh, yeah?" He clicked his tongue, a cheeky glimmer reflecting in his eyes. "Do you think it'll be bad if we head upstairs now?"

"That's not what I meant!" She let out a small giggle, scratching her chin in question. "I thought you said getting your dick wet wasn't the only thing you thought about, huh?" She taunted.

"Well, maybe there was a tiny bit of truth to that statement." He admitted as he nudged her towards the stairs, his hand sliding down her back before halting upon her left buttock cheek, giving it a small tap.

A loud cough arose from behind them, causing them to break away from one another with a start.

"I know I said I'm okay with it now, but I don't really need to see it all the time." Reid goaded with his arms crossed in mock irritation.

"I can't count the number of times I had to watch you and Indiya making out," Blaine argued.

"And the sleepless nights from the bed creaking when Lydia was over," Ria added carefully.

Reid threw his head back as he guffawed. "Sounds like I deserve it. It's good that I won't be around to be traumatised by it all then." He raced up the stairs, skipping two steps at a time. "Come on, help me pack."

"What? Pack now?" Ria rushed after him, but first, she yelled out to Hazel to ensure she was okay hosting alone. "You're leaving already? What about the wake?"

"I okayed it with Indiya's mum already. She understands." Reid clarified.

"Reid, you don't actually have to go," Ria stated, her bottom lip quivering. "I mean, where are you even going to go?"

"I was going to stop at a mate's in Newcastle for a bit. I was thinking about joining the army. Learn a thing or two about discipline."

"The army?" Blaine howled, but then noticing Reid's serious expression, he backtracked. "Wait, you're serious? The army? That's not a decision you should make on a whim."

"And the annulment? Doesn't that take months?" Ria said carefully.

"I don't need to stay in London for that. And I'm not leaving the country, guys. I'll come back. This isn't goodbye." Reid lugged open the suitcase, removing clothes from hangers and throwing them into a suitcase. "Look, Ria, I do listen to you sometimes. I roll now." He teased as he demonstrated the action.

"Will you come back for our sister? I mean, when she's born." Ria enquired, her face held in the palms of her hand as she sat cross-legged on the floor.

"Course he will." Blaine wrapped an arm around Ria's shoulder, his lips lightly brushing against her earlobe whilst Reid was distracted with packing, a soft whisper escaping his lips, "It's okay; it's time for him to flee the nest."

She nodded. "I know. It just feels like...everyone's leaving. Everything's changed."

"It's a good thing, Ria. You'll see. Time is limited, so we shouldn't waste it. And life is beyond these four walls and beyond what happened to dad. I think we need to move on. And this will help. Time apart will help."

"Yeah. You're right." Ria agreed. "I guess it's time to build a new life." She slanted against Blaine. "I'm scared, but I think I'm also excited for what the future holds. I love you. Both of you."

"Don't get all sappy on me now, Ria." Reid joked back, but he squeezed his hand against her shoulder.

Ria rolled her eyes, suppressing a laugh. "Hey, I forgot to mention, but earlier, this man was hanging around. I recognised him from earlier, at the funeral. It was odd. He was just standing outside our house."

"What, man?" Blaine asked; both boys were now currently on their knees, filling the suitcase, occasionally bickering with one another.

"He was in his mid-fourties. He had black hair and the greenest eyes I'd ever seen. He was at the back of the hall during the funeral."

"Oh, doesn't that sound like Indiya's dad?" Reid enquired. "I met him a couple of times. He wasn't really in Indiya's life much. I think he moved away. Didn't know he was back." Reid continued, barely paying heed to her words.

"Indiya's dad?" The words ran around her mind in circles as questions upon questions formulated, but she shoved the thoughts into the pits of her brain.

Her mother had perhaps left them with one final mystery, one final twist that may impact their future in days to come. But right now, that didn't matter. The future was uncertain, but she was sure that whatever trajectory she was heading in, she'd be with Blaine.

She'd spent the entirety of her life planning for perfection, but this year had been anything but. She'd loved, she'd lost, but most important of all, she'd learnt.

And now, as she gazed up at Blaine, she knew that despite everything, despite the uncertainty, the loss, and the pain they'd endured, everything would be okay. And if it wasn't, she and Blaine would work at it until it was. Because whatever direction they were moving in, they were moving together.

Whatever came next, they would face it together.

———————-
Authors Note:
It's the final chapter! Oh man, it's been a long, long ride but I hope you enjoyed it! I hope you had a fun time reading about Ria's and Blaine's long and wild story, and all the twists and turns that crept up within it.

This is my first time writing a true "romance-y" book. I don't usually read pure romances, but I tasked myself with this jobs after readers of my other book said they'd love to read a romance. I really hope it was okay - I know I slid out of the genre at times, but I think it fit in with the story. Romance is genuinely hard to write, and it's difficult to create a believable connection between two people at times, so I applaud everyone who writes romance!

There was a tiny little twist in this chapter - those of you who picked up on it, well done. Those of you who didn't, that's okay bc there is an epilogue!

The epilogue will have a one year time leap from this chapter, and it will tie up any loose ends and tells us what (most) of our characters are up to! I hope to have it out some time in the next week ❤️

If you have any questions about the characters or anything in the story, drop it here and I'll answer it sooon!

Thank you to everyone who supported me with this. It really wouldn't have been possible without you all ❤️