Chapter 36 – Memory Lane

"Anna, I'm sure you want a chance to show Caius some of your favorite places around town. Why don't you both go exploring this afternoon while I run some errands?" Grandma suggests during breakfast. I take another bite of my waffles drenched in maple syrup. "I need to make sure I get everything ready for this weekend."

Grandma is planning an early Christmas get-together on Saturday so the rest of my extended family can see me before I leave. She invited everyone from both my mom and dad's side. I'm a bit worried about Caius feeling pressured to meet everyone, but he assured me he was looking forward to it.

"That's a good idea," I reply, "There actually is somewhere I've been wanting to go."

* * *

"So where are you taking us?" Caius smirks, getting back into the passenger seat.

"Nowhere I've been before, honestly," I reply, "I feel like all my good memories of this town have been muddled." I reach into my pocket and pull out the slip of paper with Daniel's name and address on it.

"Daniel?" Caius, says, raising an eyebrow.

"You know Daniel?" I ask. Caius purses his lips at the name.

"I know of him," he finally replies.

Daniel lives way up north near the Boundary Waters, basically Minnesota's getaway for national parks and recreational sports. It's the place we were proud to talk about as kids coming back from summer vacation. Even my family went for a few summers before Emily was born. I let out a short, unamused laugh, realizing it's probably the perfect hunting ground for Daniel, realizing that what I once thought was the perfect summer getaway, could have turned into Daniel taking Derek's place if my family was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

After a couple hours we finally pull into the driveway of the modest cabin that the GPS led us to. We exit the car, surrounded by the quiet of the woods. A thick blanket of snow muffles the sound of our footsteps as we make our way to the door. The wind bites at my skin. I glance over at Caius, who has been quiet since we left my grandma's house.

"Okay," I mumble, stepping up to the front door and knocking. I wait a moment and knock again. No answer. "Hmm, maybe he's out hunting?" I wonder aloud, "How long does it take to hunt? Should we wait?" I ask, turning to Caius. He shakes his head.

"No, his scent is old. He hasn't been here for at least a few months," Caius says.

"A few months?" I repeat, shocked. He said he was coming back here after leaving Volterra, which was definitely less than a few months ago. I walk over to the window and cup my hands to see inside. Sure enough, everything seems to look way too neat and tidy.

"Perhaps he changed his plans," Caius suggests. I step back, staring at the door as a strange sense of unease settles over me.

"Maybe..." I say, thinking back to his seemingly permanent residence in Volterra. Could he still be there? Does he have more residences around the world? Why would he not come back here considering he said this is the place he said he prefers to be?

"Vampires are nomadic at heart," Caius smiles reassuringly, "It's normal for most to keep moving around to lessen the suspicion of too many disappearances in one area."

"I guess so..." I say disappointedly, turning back around in the direction of the car. It's much too cold to be standing here for much longer.

* * *

I pull my coat tighter around me, glancing out the window onto the quiet street. It's strange being back here. On one hand, everything feels the same, yet thanks to the circumstances it also feels completely different in a way. I was too busy keeping an eye on the icy roads on the way to Daniel's cabin to really take in my surroundings, but Caius insisted on driving back so I could rest my eyes a bit. I'm only now seeing the place I grew up in for what it is. The brick buildings of our town's historical downtown evokes a multitude of memories I had tucked away, but now it's as if I'm looking at it all through a pane of glass, like it's a world I once knew, but am blocked off from fully being able to belong to again.

Caius is silent as his gaze moves from one building to the next as if he's cataloging every detail. After the disappointment of this morning I figured we'd spend the rest of the day relaxing at my grandma's house, but instead, Caius is insisting on getting his own little tour.

"It's completely pointless," I argue, trying to dismiss the idea.

"If I want to understand you completely, Anna, I have to know where you came from."

I guess he's kind of right though. I know I should feel happy that he cares about my history here, but that happiness is hidden like a needle in a haystack. I haven't really had a good life here since middle school, which is already so long ago. Time has made all the happiness from back then as hazy as a dream. But anyway, now here we are, about to walk the streets of my past like a couple of ghosts that don't fit in against the backdrop of my old life.

"So," I finally say, glancing at him, "What exactly do you want to see?"

He tilts his head, "Wherever you spent your time. Anywhere that meant something to you."

"You know, you could just get all the intel from Aro. I'm sure he's seen even the things I already forgot about," I say sarcastically.

"It's not the same," he grins, ruffling my hair . I sigh.

"Okay..." I start, glancing at the signs gracing the buildings, "Here's a diner Grandma and I used to visit on Sundays when they offered a free cup of coffee from noon to 2 pm." We move on, and I show him the town basics, just the movie theater, the library...

On the way to my old school, we turn down a side street and I spot the narrow alleyway up ahead, tucked between two buildings. The chipped brick walls and rusted dumpster are like a scar on my memories, which begin to flicker at the edge of my mind. As if by habit my heart begins to race and I quicken my pace. They're dead, I have to remind myself. It's just a boring alley now.

But Caius's gaze sharpens beside me as his eyes follow my line of vision. He doesn't say anything at first, just observes, but his attention is fixed. I try to pretend like I haven't noticed, but I can feel his gaze lingering on me, putting the pieces together.

"This is where those three used to wait for you I presume?"

I swallow, trying to ignore the familiar knot forming in my stomach. "Yeah," I say.

Caius's expression doesn't change. His face is as composed as ever, but there's a flicker of something in his eyes as his gaze shifts back to the alley, lingering there as if he's mentally dissecting every shadow in its corners.

"How fortunate for them that they were given a swift death," he pauses, his eyes darkening as they flicker back to me, "Because if I had been the one to handle their punishment, mercy would have been a luxury they would not have known." His words send a chill down my spine.

At the same time, a shift stirs within me, making me realize there's something oddly healing about having Caius here with me, and showing him the secret I was never able to tell anyone. "Thank you," I murmur, not sure of what else to say. He puts his arm around me in response.

As we pass by my old high school, I stop, surprised by the nostalgia that hits me. I point to the building with a half-smile. "And that's where I spent way too many hours of my day."

"It's hard to imagine you in such a place," he says, looking at the school with a bemused expression.

"Why?" I laugh.

"It's so human," he smirks.

"Well, believe it or not, I had an ordinary human life once," I say sarcastically.

He watches me thoughtfully. "Do you miss it?"

I glance back at the school. Despite what was happening to me on the outside, my teachers were nice, the class clowns made me laugh, and overall it was a good distraction until the final bell rang each day. "I wouldn't say I miss it, but I guess it wasn't all that bad."

We continue walking, passing through familiar neighborhoods where I remember old friends living. Caius takes it all in, and absorbs every detail. Finally as we turn a corner, a familiar black iron gate comes into view, contrasting against the bright gray sky. I pause, my breath catching as I recognize the entrance to the cemetery. I didn't plan on coming here, but the sight of it stirs something in me.

Caius notices my hesitation and shifts his gaze to the gate. "Do you want to go in?" he asks softly.

I nod and his expression softens. I haven't been back here since my parents' funeral, it was too hard. But somehow, Caius being here makes it feel easier. Wordlessly, I lead him through the gate and weave between the headstones. It doesn't take long to find my parents' graves side by side with their names etched into the stone. Brandon Trenton. Eleanor Trenton. A wave of emotions washes over me. Grief, regret, love... all tangle tightly together.

"They really would be proud of you," Caius repeats my grandma's words from earlier, pulling me closer.

"You didn't even know them," I remind him. Honestly I wasn't convinced when Grandma said it either. She doesn't know the full story of what's going on in my life. Sometimes I feel like it's too easy to forget all the deaths that happen in the castle every month.

"No," he agrees, his gaze fixed on the graves, "but I know you."

A warmth spreads through me, but I can still feel the weight of the past, and the path I've chosen pressing down on me. I reach down, brushing a layer of snow from my dad's headstone, my fingers tracing the letters of his name. "I wonder what they'd think of all this... and of my life now." Caius doesn't answer, but his embrace is enough to give me strength as my eyes start to sting with tears. When I finally straighten wiping a stray tear from my cheek, I turn to him.

"Thank you," I say again. He answers me with a kiss on the top of my head.

As we turn to leave arm in arm, I look back at the graves one more time as a silent goodbye. My past shaped me, and I guess I needed more closure than I thought. It makes me even more glad that Caius came with me for this, because I definitely wouldn't have done this alone.  

Author's Note:

THANK YOU everyone for 100,000 reads on this story!  I never would have imagined that so many people would read something I wrote.  It's taken a long time to get to where the book is now, so I appreciate everyone who has given it a chance!  ♥️

Once again, in honor of Nanowrimo giving me the motivation to get super ahead in writing this story, I wanted to upload the next chapter early.   Enjoy!