Dedicated to joannestokley 

My eyes were glued on the clock, counting the seconds till class was over. My attention span was long gone. I was grateful this was my last class of the week because I couldn't wait to get out of here. April had texted thirty minutes ago that she was headed to our apartment and I couldn’t wait to see her. 

Seeing her wasn't the only reason I wanted to get out of here; I needed to get away from Chef Jacob's lingering stares. We had two classes with him today. 

But as much as  I liked knowing that he stared at me,  all it would take anyone is a few minutes to see him doing so and questioning him about it. And I know how this industry works. If word got out that there's something between us (even though there's 150% nothing going on) I would be labeled as a culinary slut. Sleeping my way to the top.

I can't allow this attraction to get in the way of my goals and lead me astray. 

"I hope you are all done, because we have run out of time." Jacob's deep voice filled the small room and rattled me out of my thoughts.

For the first hour of the lesson, we were focusing on handling meat and fish. The correct way of cleaning both of them, and as part of the lesson Chefs had to clean their own protein. Cleaning fish was a challenge for me, and I truly struggled to get the hang of gutting and filleting it without messing up the flesh.The rest of the hour we spent writing a test. 

I had finished the test fifteen minutes ago, but Chef Jacob instructed us we had to wait for everyone to finish, so as to not disturb those who were still working on their tests. 

So, here I was tapping my fingers on the desk. After what felt like an eternity , class was finally dismissed and we handed in our papers. I turned to my right and found Sophia napping. Now, why didn't I think of that?

"Soph," I softly called out, and she raised her head, blinking slowly. "Let’s go.”

Stretching and yawning she followed me to the front of the class where Chef Jacob was waiting for us. The last students to leave. Soph handed her paper in and I followed suit, avoiding Chef Jacob’s gaze and walked out of the building.

As we neared the parking lot, a voice that had no reason being here called out to me. What was Alex doing here and how did he know where to find me?

"What are you doing here, Alexander?!" I asked, not bothering to hide the anger and frustration in my voice.

"Can we talk?" He asked, walking in my direction.Soph had also stopped walking, watching the scene unfold and I could tell that her mind was working overtime. 

"No! I told you I don't want to talk to you, so leave!" I hissed, hoping he would listen.

"It's either we sit down and talk like adults, or I will keep coming here till you do. The choice is yours," he responded with smug confidence.

“Who do you think you are? To ambush me at my campus and make demands?!”

“Okay, you’re right. I’m sorry for ambushing you like this. But all I’m asking for is a couple of minutes, then I’ll be out of your hair.”

He knew I hated confrontations, but hated being nagged even more. And if I knew him as I thought I did, he would persistently come here till I caved in. The only way out of this was to sit down and listen to whatever he had to say; hopefully he would leave me alone after.

"Go on, you will find me in the car." Sophia announced when she saw the look on my face.

"I don't know how long this is going to last, and I don't want A to wait long for us. Go home, I will figure out a way to get there." 

Did Alex follow April here? Or maybe it was Mel who told him where I was?

"I will drive her home." Alex volunteered.

"I’m not going anywhere with you!” I told him, my voice dripping with venom then addressed Sophie, who was still waiting, “Don’t worry, I’ll take the bus home.”

She nodded and walked to her car, leaving me alone with Alex. I watched as she drove off then headed to the café, not even bothering to check if he was following me.

       ~~~~~~~~~~📝~~~~~~~~~~

Upon reaching the café we sat down, neither of us willing to break the tension first. Did he drive all the way here just to stare at me? I was losing my patience and fast, but as soon as he was about to talk, one of the waiters came to take our order. 

"Hello, can I get you something to drink?" 

"Can I have two cappuccinos and blueberry muffins?" Alex ordered.

"Actually, I will have a bottle of still water." 

Alex peered at me, an expression of hurt in his eyes that I turned down his order. Cappuccino and blueberry muffins were one of our favorite foods. But I was not here to go down memory lane, in fact I didn't want to be here at all, yet here I was. 

The waiter came back with our orders and we thanked him before he left.

"What did you want to talk about?" I asked when he didn't say anything after the waiter left.

"I'm sorry for everything." He said, clearing his voice.

My eyes narrowed in suspicion. "You could have said that over the phone. You didn't have to drive all the way here-." I told him, staring hard at him.

Him being here was messing up my charade and playing with my emotions. I wanted to forget everything he did, but it felt like he just wouldn't let me..

"Can you please hear me out!" He yelled, garnering a few surprised glances from the other patrons around us.

I did a double take when  I saw Chef Jacob, who I hadn't seen before, coming our way, his jaw was set. "Is everything okay here Miss Scott?" He asked, looking only at me, not sparing Alex a look.

"Yes, Chef. Sorry for disturbing you," I mumbled, mortified that he witnessed that.

"Don't apologize for others’ mistakes.” He said, and walked away.

Alex looked remorseful but I paid him no mind. I hated the situation he was putting both of us in. It was bad enough that Jake had a glimpse of my broken life.

"I didn't mean to lose my cool.. Look, I know I messed up and hurt you. It wasn't my intention to do that," he apologized and paused to take a sip of his coffee and continued."I want to explain myself, and apologize–-" I cut him off.

"Can you please get on with it?"

I knew I was acting like a bitch, but I was sure e was feeling guilty and only wanted to ease his conscience. Did he even care how I felt about this issue?

"After months of not seeing you and trying to keep our relationship going via messages and calls, it got hard for me. The time difference didn't help because most times I was free to talk to you, you weren't, and I missed having you close to me. Our time together spoiled me, always having  you within reach. One evening after a hectic week, my cousins invited me to join them for drinks. I didn't want to go, but you know how Mike can get.” He took a deep breath before  continuing.

“It was supposed to be just the guys having fun, and for the most part of the night it was. Until Mike saw some girls he knew and invited them over to our table, Sam was one of those girls. We drank and actually enjoyed the evening without stressing about exams and college life."

I listened patiently, as I sat there observing him,  it looked like he needed this more than I did.

"Nothing happened that night, we all went home separately and only met up again after a few weeks. I started spending time with her outside the group with the guys, she was funny and challenged me. For a moment, I forgot how much I missed home and actually enjoyed being there, she became a good friend. It was during that time that I stopped calling frequently.” He shook his head and found interest in the Cappuccino he was yet to drink.

“I knew that it was wrong, but consoled myself by thinking that I wouldn't have to keep you awake on our calls. After two months of spending time with Sam, she kissed me and I let her. I had not mentioned to her that I had a girlfriend back at home, each time your name was brought up she thought I was talking about my best friend and I…I never corrected her." 

Opening the water bottle I had been holding all this time, I took a huge gulp of water to swallow the emotions that I was keeping in at the surface. I thought knowing what happened would bring me closure, but I was wrong. It only brought more questions. 

"This went on for a month, and I started feeling something for her, and then one day we slept together. It felt good to connect with someone, but bit by bit I started regretting my actions because while connecting with her, I forgot about my connection with you." He finished looking anywhere, but at me.

"Why are you telling me this, Alexander?" 

"You deserve to know the truth, I know it's a little too late, but I'm shameful for what I did to you," he stated, looking at me then he continued.

"Then a few weeks after I slept with her she found out she was pregnant." He said so low I might have missed it.

Pregnant?

I felt sick and the need to run out of here was overwhelming, but I knew I had to sit it out. He had to tell me all of it, because I didn't want to go through this again. My phone vibrated in my bag, but I ignored it. I was sure it was the girls calling to check on me.

"She was happy, but mostly scared of what her parents would say. That was the day I knew I had to tell you the truth, but how would I tell my girlfriend and best friend that I impregnated another, especially over the phone?" 

"So you thought it would be less humiliating to spring it up on me in front of all those people at your home?!" I spit out, my eyes filling with tears.

As I looked at the man I once loved, I realized this was not my Alex, but a shell of him and the one thing I wouldn't give to him was my tears. He didn't deserve them!

"It was stupid of me to think you wouldn't be there, or to think my mother would miss a chance to throw a party. I'm so sorry, Amara, that was cruel and humiliating, but I didn’t know what to do. Sam’s dad had just kicked her out and had nowhere to go. I was due to come back home and couldn't leave her there knowing she was carrying my child…”

All I heard was excuses, if he loved me or Sam, he wouldn’t have put any of us in this situation. And he definitely wouldn’t have lied to any of us.

I understood why he brought her here, but that didn't mean it made it right. While I was making excuses for his lack of calls, he was sleeping with another woman and while I was preparing his welcome party, he was playing house. 

It's high time I put myself first.

"I have to go." I squeaked, taking the bottle of water and my bag with me.

Alex took bills out of his wallet to pay for our order and followed behind me, calling my name. I walked fast, willing my feet to take me away from this place. My heart was beating fast, my breaths were shallow and my eyes filled with tears I willed not to spill.

As I walked to the bus stop I saw his car following me and I picked up my pace, willing my feet to walk faster and take me away from him, but he caught up to me and I faintly heard him open his car door.

"Ara, please get in the car and let me drop you home, it's about to rain," he said, tenderly holding my arm like he used to and I felt angry tears running down my cheeks.

How many times had that tender voice fooled me into forgiving him? How many times had I gotten lost in those hazel eyes of his and gave into his demands? 

"I’d rather walk in thunderstorms than be in your presence." I voiced bitterly, pulling my arm out of his grip.

A car stopped next to us and the booming voice of Chef Jake cut the tense moment, "Miss Scott, is everything alright?”

“Yeah, he was just leaving. Weren’t you, Alex?” 

He nodded and walked towards his car, then looked back at me before getting in and drove off. Why did my Chef instructor keep finding me in this position? “It’s about to rain, get in the car and I will take you home." He ordered and I scoffed

"My feet work just fine. Thank you, I will walk home." I said with sass. 

"Kitten, I wasn’t asking.” His demanding voice said. “And the next bus will be here at 7 PM, so you have two choices: either get in the car or wait here in the rain till the next bus arrives.”

Who did he think he was, ordering me around?

I looked into his eyes, weighing my options; if I walked home, I would surely get wet and our plans with the girls would get canceled and if I waited here for the bus I would be late. I sighed and  walked towards his passenger seat. 

After giving Chef Jacob my address, we rode in silence. I was embarrassed that he saw me at my lowest arguing with my ex in public. I wondered what he thought of me as he kept glancing in my direction, as though afraid I might break and I hated it.

“I’m sorry you had to witness that, it never should have happened.”

He kept quiet and digested my words, “You couldn’t have predicted that I would witness all that and I believe I already told you never to apologize for the mistakes done by others.”

I nodded and we fell in comfortable silence for the duration of the drive to my apartment building.  "Thank you for the ride." I said as he killed the ignition having arrived at my apartment.

"No problem, enjoy your weekend, Miss Scott."

          ~~~~~~~~~~👩‍🍳👭~~~~~~~~~~

April opened her arms and I hugged her as soon as I walked in, glad that she was here with me. After a few seconds I grabbed Sophia for a group hug. April pulled away first, searching my eyes and told me Alex called. 

“Are you okay? I’m sorry that he ambushed you like that, he must have followed me here.”

“I’m fine, he just took me by surprise. And don’t apologize for his actions.” I said, sitting down.

"How did you get home?" Sophia asked, joining me on the couch.

"Jacob gave me a ride.”

"Who's Jacob?" April asked, looking between the two of us. "Do you have a boyfriend, Ara?" She asked playfully, trying to defuse the tension.

"No! Where would I get the time for dating? Especially Chef Jake?" I asked, disturbed by his name and boyfriend in the same sentence.

“Jake is Mr. Latte, April.” Sophia added with a knowing smile.

“Mr. Latte? You mean the guy you met at William’s cafe?” 

“Yep! Imagine how shocked I was to see him on campus.”

It was still hard to believe he was the same guy I met a month ago, it was like day and night different. Mr. Latte looked so posh, yet fun and Chef Jake was so moody and macho.  

"The way Alex spoke about him made me think maybe he was your boyfriend." April said, snapping me out of my thoughts..

"Speaking of Alex, did–" I cut her off as soon as I caught on where she was going with this.

"Someday we will talk about that, but it's still raw and painful. Today is about you, so let's go get ready!" I stated, with a small smile.

For the next hour and half the girls and I showered and got ready to party! As April did minimal makeup on her face I looked through my closet, not sure what to wear. An idea popped in my head and I kept looking through the many clothes until I found what I was looking for.

"Damn! Is that what you are wearing?" April asked, when she saw me holding the small dress.

"Yep! We are going clubbing and this my friend is the perfect dress!" I told her, changing into the small red dress.

It was a short, sparkling red backless body con dress with thin straps. I hadn't worn this dress since April made me buy it months ago, but today I was brave enough to wear it. I paired it with silver stilettos and a silver clutch bag. My long black hair was in a messy bun, leaving my back exposed, my pouty lips were painted red as sin and my eyes popped due to the mascara and eyeliner I had used.

While I was going for bold colors today, April was going for sweet and soft colors, she was wearing a maxi mid thigh red rose dress. It hugged her curves perfectly, and she paired the look with soft makeup, but went for smokey eyes. She was wearing black heels and holding her black satchel bag. Her brown hair was in curls and looked shorter today.

"You look sexy and beautiful." I told her.

Soph was closing her door as we stepped out of my room. Like me, she was daring tonight, dressed in a one shoulder green short body con dress. Her blonde hair was straightened and her small green eyes which were a few shades lighter than mine looked bigger due to makeup she went for. Her pale skin looked beautiful and her lips were painted red like mine.

"You two are making me question my sexuality." April teased.

Before leaving we took selfies, videos and giggled while April was posting on her social media sights. I often posted my food, but every now and then I posted my pictures, so I thought why not! Among the many pictures we took I posted a picture of the three of us, smiling at the camera.

"Let's go paint the town red!" I wrote in the caption on my Instagram picture to the girls and we took off in a taxi.