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~

I chickened out.

When Dean asked if I was ready to go to the diner so we could discuss things, I blurted out a lie about having to pick up Justin from practice. He obviously saw through it but didn't do anything about it.

Ugh. I was so close to just ending the circles we ran in but I couldn't do it. As much as I was willing to forgive Dean, I felt like I needed some time. He might've sensed that from my reaction. He always had a knack for figuring me out.

Deep down, I was scared he wouldn't tell me about Skylar. It had to do with my fear of rejection, maybe? Which was stupid because I knew he liked me. He was the one pursuing me! So why was I so scared?

It didn't help that Ben decided to make a sudden reappearance. All these sudden apologies had my head spinning. Why now? Why me?

I didn't know what to think of it. All I knew is that I needed to tell Reece about it.

Soon though.

For the next two days, I kept getting little gifts in my locker. It ranged from flowers to cards to letters. Every time I got something new, I made it a point to keep the old gift in there. My locker was getting ridiculously full by that point, but I wanted him to know that I wasn't going to be easily swayed.

My mind couldn't process why he suddenly wanted to be friends.

Ugh, just when I thought life was getting easier, it kept throwing curveballs at me. It was ridiculous at this point.

He hadn't confronted me in person since the day I bumped into him. If he hadn't, I wouldn't even know all these gifts were from him in the first place. But now, he wasn't making another in-person effort.

I wish he did. It would've been so much easier to see his intentions if we talked face to face. That way I'd have a hint of emotion coming from him. All these 'gifts', as nice as they were, were impersonal. It really didn't count unless an apology left his lips.

As I was walking to my locker after lunch, I caught a flash of dirty blond hair nearby. Before he saw me, I ducked into the nearest hallway and peered my head around.

Ben skillfully opened my locker. How he got the combination, I had no idea. Then he shoved a small teddy bear in there.

Having enough, I walked up to him. His back was to me so he hadn't seen me yet. "You know, apologies mean more if they're made in person."

He tensed before slowly turning around. "Actions speak louder than words." 

Or you're a coward.

"How'd you get my locker combination?" I crossed my arms and raised an accusing brow. He awkwardly shifted on his heels and I knew he wouldn't be answering. Rolling my eyes, I impatiently tapped my foot. "Alright. What do you want?"

"I'm so–" He stopped and furrowed his brows. He settled on saying, "Your forgiveness." If he wanted it that bad, he could've said sorry.

"Ironic how the tables of turned," I bitterly laughed. "Why?"

"What do you mean?"

"Why now? Why at all? Do you even feel remorse for the way you treated me?"

His jaw pulsed. "Well, you said some pretty harsh things to me too. I needed time to get over that."

Now that was true. I regretted the words that left my mouth that night. It was low to tell Ben that his dad was disgusted by him, but I was in the heat of the moment.

"You humiliated me," I said impassively.

"You did too," he pointed out, then sighed. He pinched the bridge of his nose and forced himself to relax. "Whatever. I'm over that night."

"Yeah, I'm sure you lost so much sleep," I sarcastically muttered. "Well since you're here, can you clean out all the shit you left in my locker?"

He blinked. "Pardon?"

"Take it out. Throw it away. I don't care. I don't want it."

"B–but there's some expensive stuff in there..." he trailed looking utterly confused. "Do you not want it?"

I forced myself to remain calm. After everything, he still thought I was shallow. Then what was the point of the apology in the first place? He clearly didn't mean it.

"No, I don't," I snapped. "Go give it to your druggie friends or whatever." It was a little harsh but well-deserved. He's lucky I didn't do worse.

"Bella," He gave me an exasperated look.

I held up my hand. I was uninterested in whatever he had to say. "Clean it out and leave me alone." As I went to walk away, he grabbed my arm.

But the most surprising thing happened. He loosened his grip! Not completely, but enough to not hurt me anymore.

For Ben, this was uncharacteristic. He never failed to leave a mark when he held on. What was different this time?

"Please, I'll explain everything," he pleaded. His steely eyes softened enough to show me how genuine he was being.

I couldn't believe I was even contemplating this.

"Explain." I shook my arm out of his grip and crossed my arms to seem well composed. In reality, I was shaking on the inside. From what? No idea.

He softly shook his head and eyed the other students lingering in the hall. No one was paying attention to us, but that didn't mean they weren't curious. "Tomorrow, my place."

Tomorrow was Friday. The football game was another away game, which I wasn't attending, so it wouldn't be hard to make it there without distractions.

"I need to think about it."

Disappointment flashed on his face but he was quick to mask it. "How will I know if you're coming?"

Technically I wasn't supposed to have his number and I never gave him mine either, so there was no way to communicate with him. Logically now would've been the time to get his number but I wanted him to squirm a little.

"Listen Stark, if I'm there, I'm there. If I don't show, then you have your answer." He looked surprised by my answer but slowly nodded like he was still processing it. He still probably wasn't used to not having his way. For good measure, I mockingly added, "Make sure to clean up your drugs just in case."

He made a face. Not a happy one, but rather a grimace. I didn't know whether it was because I was being blunt or because he didn't wanna clean up his mess. Whatever it was, I didn't care.

I walked away from him wondering if I was doing the right thing.

~~~

"Thanks for much for meeting me," I grinned at the three in front of me. Skylar was paying more attention to her manicured nails than me. Dean was giving me a confused look and Reece was busy flickering his gaze between us. None of them knew what this was about. "So..."

"Bella, is everything okay?" Reece finally asked, sensing my hesitation. Could you blame me though? I went on for weeks about how I was done with Ben and suddenly I was proposing the idea of restarting the mission.

Skylar dramatically dropped her hand in her lap, making a slapping sound. "I have other stuff to do."

It took everything in me to not roll my eyes. "Okay, I'll make this quick then. I wanna resume the mission."

Three pairs of eyes stared at me in shock.

"No," Dean said before I even had a chance to explain myself. It gave me a sense of déjà vu to when the mission was originally proposed. He had the same reaction.

I gave him a flat look, then turned to the other two. "Ben has been approaching me lately–"

"He has?" Dean interrupted.

"–and I think he's sorry for what he's done. Enough for him to want to explain himself," I continued.

"So what are you implying?" Reece asked. He seemed like the only hopeful one in this situation.

I puffed out my cheeks as my eyes flickered from person to person. I lingered on Dean a little longer, but that was more for his looks and not gauging his reaction. "He invited me to go to his house tomorrow so he could explain himself."

"No," Dean repeated again, which I ignored.

I kept my sight on Reece. He was the one I needed to convince. "I came to you guys instead of going alone because I think I can get answers out of him, once and for all. If you're willing to help, then great. If not, I'll still go."

"Reece," Dean warned.

I turned to him. "Listen, I'm trying here, okay? I know you're concerned but at least I told you about it instead of going behind your back."

Yes, I was still bitter.

That was enough for him to back down. I turned back to Reece and Skylar. Technically it was their mission so it was ultimately up to them.

"She said she's going to do it either way, so isn't it better if we join? That way we'll get some intel," Skylar said as if I wasn't in the room.

Reece nodded. "I agree. Plus we'll be able to keep an eye on her."

Seriously?! I was right here.

Skylar turned to me with an impassive face. "Fine."

That's it?

"I told him to expect me tomorrow. Probably around eight. Is that enough time to get everything settled?"

Dean cleared his throat. "Don't I get a say in all of this?"

"No," the three of us said simultaneously.

Before I could feel the guilt of acting harsh, Reece spoke up. I'm pretty sure it had to do with the glare Dean was sending him. "Well, he is the man of the mission. We're trying to save his life."

"Exactly and if I know Dean, he'll gladly sacrifice his own life for someone else," Skylar said pointedly. Not only did it remind me that she knew him better than me, but also made me wonder what the story behind her words was.

Dean rolled his eyes at her. "You all are such drama queens."

Skylar smirked as her eyes twinkled with amusement, "You'd know." Reece's didn't match theirs, meaning he wasn't included in their inside joke. It should've made me feel better considering I felt left out, but it made me feel worse.

An inside joke between Skylar and Dean filled me with jealousy.

This wouldn't even happen if he had just told me about their past! What if I'm getting jealous over something trivial?

Either way, it doesn't matter now. I can't go back and change the past so it's useless to mull over it.

He finally broke away from her catty eyes. "Seriously though. You guys are blowing this way out of proportion."

"Then why don't you trust Bella with him?" Reece asked with amusement. He sent me a wink before feigning surprise. "Oh... you're jealous."

Dean didn't deny it and it made Skylar tick. I could see the rage within her ignite as she looked me way. Her lips curled into a sneer.

Yeah, she was totally in love with him.

It was always amusing to see her switch from her professional side to her jealous side. When it came to gang-related stuff, she usually kept her cool. Her hatred for me only made an appearance when Dean was mentioned. Other than that, she remained only generally annoyed with me.

"Ben won't harm me," I reassured them.

Dean's fist clenched. "So you're cozy with him now?"

I shook my head and gave Reece an exasperated look. He was my only hope at this point. But that traitor didn't seem so sure himself. "But something happened during homecoming," he annoyingly pointed out.

I pursed my lips as I thought back to that night. The drugs, the yelling, the mocking. It was something I'd never go through again. I was only lucky that no one forced me to try anything. It's not like things were so terrible. I think what terrified me what was could have happened rather than what really did.

Thinking about it, it was a scary situation. I was in an unfamiliar house with potentially dangerous strangers. Most were either drunk or high. So many things could've happened. I could've been raped or hurt. Hell, maybe the police could've stopped by and raided the place. I doubt that would happen but you never knew. I could've been arrested for possession of drugs even though I wouldn't touch them with a ten-foot pole.

"It doesn't matter. He promised he would clean up his act. And besides, that's what you guys are for. You can keep surveillance and barge in if anything's wrong." I was trying to convince them, but maybe myself too. All the 'what-ifs' were stressing me out. Before, I wouldn't have considered Ben to be dangerous (even though he was in a gang) but I truly didn't know him.

And it scared me.

"You can't seriously go off a promise," Dean scoffed. I had to admit, he looked a little childish as he crossed his arms and nearly pouted at me.

"Deanie, she'll be fine." Skylar sent him a look that conveyed him to stop arguing.

Reece and I both cringed at the nickname, then shared a look that said 'ew'. At least we both agreed on that.

I really wasn't sure of what Reece thought of Skylar. Initially, I figured they were close – as I did for everyone else – but he seemed slightly annoyed by her.

Maybe I was reading too into things. He was the one who defended her when Dean left with her at the party. Ever since Mr. Cullen told me that Skylar wasn't liked by the family, I started assuming everyone felt the same.

Needless to say, I was intrigued. Would Dean listen to his precious Sky or would he still be opposed to everything?

I subconsciously leaned forward with my elbows propped on my legs. I was sitting crisscross on the floor of Reece's office. Like usual, Skylar had the chair and Reece was leaning against his desk. Dean was sitting next to me. Our shoulders occasionally brushed. I didn't like the sparks his touch was sending me so I kept scooting away subtly. Somehow he managed to find his way right next to me.

"I think Arabella and I need to speak about this. Alone," he finally said.

Yay! He didn't succumb to Skylar. That was a good sign, right?

When his words processed, my eyes widened slightly. Knowing Dean, we'd argue about the matter. I didn't wanna be left alone with him. I could already tell he was pissed because I basically put him on the spot instead of clearing it with him first. I sent Reece a panicked look but he simply shrugged.

Surprisingly, Skylar came to my rescue. Sure, she had her own intentions, but whatever. "No, I think we should all talk it out together. After all, this is our" –she pointed between her and Reece– "mission."

"Ooh, someone's jealous," Reece sang teasingly. She sent him a glare but he remained unaffected. "I think they should talk it out. Maybe leaving them alone will solve some underlying issues." The emphasis on certain words and look in his eyes let me know he wanted me to talk to Dean about our relationship rather than the mission. I wouldn't, but nice effort, I guess.

"So mature, Reece," Skylar said, rolling her eyes, "but I guess." She stood up and gestured for Reece to follow.

He ducked down and whispered, "We'll be on the other side of the door," while winking. 

So, he'd eavesdrop.

Soon enough, we were both alone. Neither of us made a move to speak first. We didn't even look at each other.

He broke the silence. "I think this is a dumb idea." I turned my head to face him and found he was a lot closer than I anticipated. My breath hitched and I quickly scooted over to force some distance between us.

"And I think it's a good idea," I lamely retorted back.

He shook his head. "Why? There's no way you're doing this for me. You don't think Ben's going to hurt me."

No, I said he wouldn't hurt me.

He had a point though. I wasn't really doing this for him. This was a little personal.

His eyes widened as realization dawned on him. "You're being curious again."

"Am not!" I denied.

"You wanna know why he's suddenly being nice to you," Dean continued with an accusing tone.

Well, he wasn't wrong. "Okay, maybe," I mumbled sheepishly. "Aren't you curious too? We hadn't talked in weeks. What if he knows about the plan? He'll tell me everything if I just go!" I sounded a little desperate but I really needed to know what Ben had under his sleeve. Was he being genuine or not?

Dean groaned as he dragged his hands down his face. "You'll be the death of me."

Wait. Dean still likes me. Why haven't I used that to my advantage?

I pouted and gave him my most innocent eyes. "Please? Besides, you'll be right there. If anything happens, you can play my knight."

I watched in anticipation as he mulled it over. His eyes kept changing shades as he thought out all the consequences. I sweetly smiled as I prayed internally.

"Please Dean, I need to know. The curiosity is going to kill me," I added. "If I don't find out then I'll think about it forever. Pleeeeease?"

He was a tough one to crack. He continued to mull over it.

Shaking my head at my manipulative tendencies, I did something that wasn't morally right. I seduced him. Kinda.

While he was busy thinking it over, I slowly leaned in. His eyes widened as my lips brushed against his. This was no means my way of telling him I was getting back together with him but desperate times called for desperate measures.

"Please?" I whispered, looking at him through my lashes.

I could see his walls crumbling. He cupped my face with one hand and brushed his thumb against my cheek. The absolute fire I felt from a single touch was mindblowing to this day. I began to wonder how I stayed away for so long.

When his eyes shifted to my lips, I knew I had my answer. Still, I waited for verbal confirmation.

"Okay."

I pushed my lips to his and kissed him. It was short and sweet; a thank you kiss. I didn't want him to think everything was back to normal, but I did want him to know I was happy. Plus it was rude to tease him without a reward.

He rested his forehead against mine as our breaths mingled. "But I have some conditions."

"Anything," I grinned, excited about the fact that he said yes in the first place. Man, that boy was whipped.

I mean, I was too, but that's not the point.

We finally pulled away from each other. Thank god for that because it took everything in me to not kiss him senseless. And I mean a real kiss.

"We've talked, you can come in now," I said a little louder, knowing the two probably had their ear to the door. Sure enough, they casually strolled back in.

Reece looked extra smug, so I knew he heard our entire conversation. Skylar looked impassive but her eyes gave away her irritation. So basically, they both eavesdropped.

"What's the verdict, boss?" Reece asked Dean.

Dean rolled his eyes. "Fine. But I have conditions."

Skylar leaned back on the office chair and rested her arms on her belly. "Like what?"

"Surveillance. I want a foolproof plan. If Ben finds out that Arabella's a spy, God knows what he'll do," Dean replied in a formal tone. It was the same tone he used when he talked business. I hardly ever heard it before except for the night I eavesdropped on him at the park while he was talking to some members of his gang.

It was kinda hot, I had to admit.

"Of course," Reece said casually. Unlike Dean, he remained the same carefree person. "We'll have a van outside his house."

"His property is huge and pretty secure so you'll have to park a little further so he doesn't get suspicious," I pointed out.

Reece nodded in acknowledgment and continued. "And if something does happen, Bella can call us and we'll be right there. Armed and everything." Bringing weapons sounded pretty dramatic in my opinion but I've never had to deal with these kinds of things.

"No. I want her to wear a microphone so we can hear everything that's going on. What if she's in a situation where she can't call?" Dean ordered. His strict voice sent a shiver down my spine. From pleasure or fear? No clue.

Wait, a microphone? "Dean, I don't think–"

"Deal," Reece said before I could finish. He gave me a look, silently telling me this was the only way Dean would agree. I guess he was right. A microphone seemed like a trivial condition for letting me do it in the first place. I had to meet him halfway for this to work. After all, I could tell how much he didn't want me to go in the first place.

I just had to suck it up.

"Fine," I sighed, not that my opinion mattered.

Dean gave me a curt nod.

Skylar stretched her entwined fingers, cracking her knuckles. "Okay, van and microphone are settled. Now Bella, are you planning on seducing him? Because your normal clothes won't work."

"What? No!" I gasped. "I'm just gonna ask."

She let out a disbelieving snort. "Alright. Because that worked out so well."

"Skylar," Reece warned.

Something snapped in me. Normally I'd brush her comment aside but I couldn't this time. "At least I did more than you! Telling me his coffee order was hardly any work on your part." Reece snickered, making me feel like I did the right thing.

Her threatening eyes narrowed at me. "That's a lot of nerve coming from someone who managed to get shot while eavesdropping."

Reece's smile dropped. I guess he still felt guilty for that night. "Skylar!"

I couldn't help but laugh. She had a point. "Okay, you got me there."

Everyone was staring at me like I had three heads.

"What?" I asked.

"You– you didn't fight back," Reece whispered in shock.

I rolled my eyes. They truly were drama queens. "Well, she was right," I shrugged. What was the big deal? I barely argued with Skylar in the first place.

After her initial shock, she narrowed her eyes at me. "Yeah, I was."

Now I was the confused one. Why was she pissed?

She shook her head, making her red curls bounce over her shoulder. "Whatever. We're getting off-track. What's your plan?"

"Well, I was just gonna show up – a little late, of course, to make him squirm. But yeah, I'm just gonna go?" I was confused as to why I needed a plan in the first place. He was the one who asked me to meet him.

"What makes you think this isn't a trap?" she challenged, raising a thin brow.

I shrugged. "I don't know if it is, but the gifts he's been leaving in my–"

"Gifts?" Dean echoed.

I nodded, feeling a little sheepish. He didn't know about all the apology efforts. "Uh, yeah. Ben's been leaving things in my locker for the past couple of days."

Reece let out a low whistle. "Man, he's good. Dean, you have some serious competition."

"Shut up," Dean muttered.

"Anyways, he's been leaving a lot of gifts for me. If this was a trap, he would've apologized in person. But if he's too embarrassed" –or egotistical– " to apologize face to face, it might mean it's genuine, right?"

Skylar nodded in agreement while Reece huffed, "I see your point."

"We can't knock it until we try it."

I made sure to avoid looking at Dean throughout this whole time. I didn't want to see him regretting his decision.

"Okay, Sky and I will work out the logistics and text you the details later," Reece concluded. "The students will be coming back soon, so you guys need to leave."

I almost forgot we were still in school. It was 7th period–another study hall skipped.

We all piled out and I shot Reece a grateful smile as I left. Skylar looked back at Dean, silently asking if he was following. He shook his head, making her pout. Regardless, she went ahead, leaving us alone in the hallway.

Dean and I walked side by side. As our arms swayed, his pinky caught on to mine. He didn't let go and neither did I.

We came to an eventual stop at the end of the empty hallway. "Arabella, I'm worried for you."

I turned toward him. "Dean, I already said–"

"Not that he's going to hurt you," he quickly added with a dark look. "I'm worried he doesn't have genuine intentions. I can tell how much hope you have in him, and I don't want you to crumble when it happens."

"If it happens," I corrected. "And you're right. I do have hope for him. But I also know how bipolar he is, so I'm kinda expecting it by now."

He furrowed his brows and stepped closer. "If you change your mind..."

"I won't," I quickly said, then smiled to lessen the blow. "But I appreciate your concern. It's heartwarming." I genuinely meant it.

"You don't give up on people, do you?" I shook my head. He grinned and grabbed my hand, lifting it up to his lips and planting a kiss on it without breaking eye contact. "Remember that when it comes to me." He dropped my hand and offered one smile before leaving me in the hallway, dazed.

The butterflies in my stomach were having a rager. How could he be so incredibly cute yet hot? Every touch sent me electric shocks, even the smallest of things.

I had it bad for Dean. So bad.