A/N - Hey guys and welcome to Chapter Eight. Picture of Caspar ^^^^^

——- Hannah's P.O.V ——-

So, Caspar went public with our relationship a couple of days ago and I was totally for it until I saw what some of his viewers have been saying. I have no idea why they are like this though, I just don't understand it. I don't know if Caspar has seen it but if he has then he hasn't said anything to me about it or stuck up for me. I have tried to ignore it, honestly I have but every single time I go on any type of social media there is someone there saying things about me and it is getting to me.

I don't want to go back to my old habits, the things in my head telling me to continue and start again even though I do not want to but right now I am getting driven back towards the habits. Caspar is out tonight with Sawyer and Joey, I was originally invited but I said I didn't want to go because I wasn't feeling well but truthfully I knew that either Joey or Sawyer would be vlogging and I don't want to get even more hate. I think I should call someone; Troye is the only person that knows about my old habit.

(H - Hannah~T - Troye)

T - What's up? It's kind of late.

H - It's the hate Troye.

T - Awh Han.

H - What do I do?

T - You should talk to Caspar about it.

H - But I can't. He's out.

T - Call him Han.

H - But, Troye. It hurts.

T - I know it does Twinkle.

H - It's getting too much.

T - Twinkle. Don't make me think that you are going to do that.

H - Troye. I don't know what to do anymore. I love Caspar, I really do but I feel like his viewers would like to kill me. I might as well just do it myself.

T - Please Hannah, please don't. You know that it won't help anything. You've been clean for too long.

H - I can try. I just needed someone to talk to.

T - Look Hannah. You know I love you and Caspar does too. Try your best.

H - I love you too Troye. Thanks.

I hang the phone up and just cry into the pillow. I don't even have enough will power right now to resist against the voices in my head 'It will help Hannah' one says and I start to agree 'Caspar hasn't said anything' another says and I cry even more thinking about why Caspar hasn't said anything to me about it, or even stood up for me.

I stand up and walk into the bathroom, I dig through my make-up bag looking for something that I haven't touched in years. I know I shouldn't but it takes away the pain, it makes me forget about everything. Besides, I don't even know who would care right now. Then I find it, the blade that I swore to steer clear of when I wanted to stop.

I run the blade over my wrist multiple times, each time thinking of a different comment that I have seen, a different comment every single time. The comments never disappear and they should. I just want someone to stick up for me, someone to tell them to stop. That's all I need, that's all I want but clearly right now that isn't going to happen.

I don't feel any better when I finish, I wanted to feel like everything went away, like those comments didn't matter anymore but worse is all I feel. I clean up my wrist and just decide to climb into bed, hoping to fall asleep and forget about what I just did. It has never been something I was proud of and it never will be. I don't want Caspar to find out.

——- Caspar's P.O.V ——-

I'm kind of worried that Hannah hasn't text or anything. Usually she has done by now, it isn't like her. I have seen the hate that she has been getting since I posted that video, I am unsure about talking to her about it because I don't want to upset her or anything. It isn't the easiest thing to do, talk to your girlfriend about people she doesn't know saying that she should die, she isn't good enough, she is not pretty, she should have never been born.

I say goodbye to Sawyer and Joey because I just want to see Hannah. I want to see that she is okay. I have tried to call her, I have tried to text her, I have left her a bunch of voicemails but not once has she gotten back to me and that is why I am worried about her. I have a right to be though, she is my girlfriend and I love her so much. I do not want her to suffer on her own, I am going to talk to her about the hate and I am going to tell my viewers to back off. At this point I feel like I would choose her over YouTube, I hate saying that but Hannah has become my life. I know that we haven't been dating all that long but when you feel a connection with someone, a connection like nothing else can compare to it, then you know that this someone is the person you need to be with and give everything to.

I walk into the villa and Hannah isn't on the couch watching TV like I expected her to be doing, she isn't in the kitchen and I don't hear the shower running so I am guessing that she is in bed. I go into our room and see my little angel sleeping in one of my shirts, I sit down next to her but I see something on her wrist. I gently pick it up and see multiple fresh cuts there, she self harms? Crap, what if she did this because of that hate, I wasn't here to stop her. Oh god, what type of boyfriend am I?

I gently shake her awake and when she opens her eyes she smiles. Then her gaze averts to me holding her wrist and she quickly pulls it back "You weren't supposed to see that" she says sounding defeated "Why baby? You are too beautiful to be doing this to yourself" I say and she sighs "The hate Caspar. Have you not seen it? It is everywhere. It got too much. I didn't want to but the people in my head were telling me to, I feel no better than I did before but it helped me to forget for that short time and that's all I wanted but now I feel like shit because of what I did" she says tears rolling down her perfect cheeks. I wipe them away with my thumbs, I look into her eyes "I have seen everything love. I never said anything because I didn't want to make it worse" I say and she nods "Go back to sleep now. I am going to take care of this. I promise everything will be better in the morning" I say pulling the covers over her once again "I love you" she mumbles closing her eyes and I chuckle "I love you too baby. Sweet dreams" I say pressing a sweet kiss to her lips before leaving the room.

I set my filming equipment up in the living room, I am filming a video for my viewers to tell them about this and that they need to stop. I sit down on the couch and press record on the camera. I take a deep breath before starting (A/N - Next paragraph is Caspar's video)

"Hi guys" I say not waving at the camera this time "I wasn't expecting to film another video this week but something has come up" I say sighing "I have seen everything you guys have been sending to my girlfriend. I have seen the good but I have also seen the bad" I say looking straight into the camera "The hate is disgraceful. I never expected something of you guys. Especially towards someone that you know is extremely important to me" I say playing with my hands a bit "Do you think that it is easy to read that? Do you think that it is easy to see Hannah crying over all of this?" I ask shaking my head in disappointment "I think you all need to think about this. Think about what you have done. VidCon is coming up but I am not planning on doing anything unless this stops" I say taking a deep breath "I am taking a break from YouTube" I say turning the camera off.

—————————————————————————————————————————

That was Chapter Eight, hope you liked it.

Any opinions you guys have please tell me in the comments.

Thanks for reading.

Till the next chapter.......