"can I touch your heart? I want to touch it but it keeps slipping through my fingers, someday, someday.

CHAPTER EIGHT

crystal snow only holds an ambiguous shape. I can't bear my story of unrequited love. eh I'll manage to change it on my own."

—

After Jungkook met Elianna, things changed around him.

He wouldn't just think about her more, he'd notice her more and see her more. He'd see her crossing the street with her eyes lowered, walking past him with her earphones blasting loud music which made him wonder, what kind of music does she listen to? He'd see her with Shira in a coffee shop, in a tree filled park when he would go out for a run; he'd end up running in the opposite direction though, because he wouldn't know how to react if she saw him. He'd see her whilst walking to Taehyung's and spend a few minutes thinking about whether or not to say hello to her. He thought about bumping into her and spilling coffee over her like in the books but he didn't even like coffee. Elianna usually never saw him back, it was always him seeing her around the town they live in.

The one time he saw her was when he was walking back from the dance studio. His bag was swinging over his shoulder, he was sweating and grumpy because he was in need of a desperate shower. She was walking past, hands in pockets and she was alone. They made brief eye contact and Jungkook swears he saw a smirk playing on her lips. He did a double take and looked over his shoulder, she wasn't staring back like he was hoping.

Seeing Elianna around so much made him wonder why he had never seen her before. He now noticed her on the streets, in the crowds and in places he never used to. It shows just how much he has a thing for Elianna. Jungkook doesn't know what to call what he feels for her. It's just a stupid crush he hates.

One time, Elianna was at Taehyung's apartment. He opened the door without knocking to see Elianna on the kitchen counter, her legs swinging as she shouted to Taehyung who was in the bathroom, wanting toilet paper.

Jungkook came to the rescue, trying to ignore the weird feeling in his stomach when Elianna greeted him with a wide smile and he grabbed the toilet paper.

He went to the toilet and threw it at his best friends face.

After the three of them spent time together, Jungkook walked Elianna back to her apartment. It was one of his favourite moments with her. Her side bumped into his all the way and they walked extra slowly so it took longer to get to hers. He talked, she talked, he listened, she listened. Jungkook wanted to kiss her goodnight but chose not to when she thanked him, squeezing his hand so quickly that he didn't even notice, before closing the door.

Jungkook wouldn't say that they're friends ... they are but they aren't. He's drawn to her, captivated and he wants to get to know her.

That is what's on Jungkook's mind as they lie in bed, in their room together. It's been a month since they've met.

Jungkook came to this week's party with Taehyung as usual. Elianna was the first person he saw when he got there, she found him, grabbed his hand and never let go. Jungkook felt more than happy to be dragged around by her, his hand closely held in hers as she looked overjoyed to see him.

It meant something when she kissed his knuckles as if it was a natural response, Elianna didn't notice but Jungkook did.

They ended up playing a game which involved confessions. Luckily, Jungkook didn't have to confess anything major but the game turned out to be hilarious. Taehyung was drunk, Shira confessed "one time in the toilets, this girl asked me for a pad and I said no because it was the only one I had left." And she looked so guilty.

Jin was present too and wouldn't stop annoying Shira about how he wanted to hold her hand. She kept brushing him off and Jin eventually grabbed her hand which made her hit the back of his head. "Look at Elianna and-" is what Jin shouted and that was the first time Shira made eye contact with Jungkook, she was clueless, a little intimidating but she did smile!

"I don't care." Shira walked away from Jin.

Two hours later, Jungkook lies in bed with Elianna. His thoughts are a mess and he's thinking with his heart rather than his mind.

Jungkook wants to be with Elianna.

He really wants to be with her.

It's worth a shot, he thinks to himself. He also has to remind himself of his worth, he can't be reduced to a relationship based on sex.

Jungkook coughs and shifts a little so Elianna can lean her head comfortably on his arm. "I don't think you're going to like what I'm about to say right now."

They're sprawled out beside each other, on the bed, staring at the ceiling, fully clothed because they're too lazy to go downstairs and be around people. So Elianna took his hand after they got dressed and pulled him towards the bed. Now she's lying with him, playing with the rings on his hand.

Elianna scoots closer to Jungkook. She glances up at him and brings her head from leaning on his arm to his shoulder. "Say it."

Kookie calm down!, he tells himself but he can't because he hates being attached. He's afraid of how she's going to react.

"I want us to be together." Jungkook breathes out. "I don't want us messing around ... I want you and I want us." He admits.

Elianna let's go of his hand. "We are together." She giggles and presses herself against him.

Jungkook sighs. "Come on, you know what I mean."

The look on Elianna's face changes so fast that Jungkook becomes nervous all over again. "I don't do relationships. I'm not looking for anything serious."

Just like Taehyung mentioned.

"I'm not surprised, I've kinda noticed." Jungkook says and he doesn't meet her gaze. He should've known she wouldn't give the answer he was hoping for like, of course Jungkook, let's be together I'll be your girlfriend and you'll be my boyfriend! Yet, even though he prepared himself, he still got left with disappointment brewing in his heart.

Elianna looks uncomfortable and she stays beside him, quietly. "So why did you say it then?"

"Because I figured I'd give it a shot."

"Well ... I'm not looking for anything now." Elianna repeats.

You said that.

Jungkook can't help but feel upset because not even a sorry leaves her lips. She keeps leading him on and he's frustrated, annoyed and upset. He walked right into this mess and he has to fix it now.

Jungkook moves his arm away and hurt flashes across Elianna's face. He thinks nothing of it, she doesn't feel what he feels. "I think it's best if we don't talk or anything ... because it won't lead us anywhere. I don't want to get too involved." He forces himself to speak up.

Elianna sits up. "Fine by me." And she leaves him, again, but this time with a flirty wink.

—

Accidental Group Chat featuring Taehyung which is a texting fanfic, is published. I'll be updating regularly so don't forget to check that out ...

... also Min Yoongi: Love Maze
coming soon ;)

take care and remember jhope exists, what else do we need tbh

A x