The only person I talked to about Alpha Bren is Clara. So, when I walk through the pack and start getting pitiful looks from my members, I knew Bren told someone else. For a few days, everything seemed normal and okay. I avoided walking by the Pack House. I made sure to just go to my training sessions and socialize with my other friends who weren't a part of the Ceremony. Clara and everyone who graduated were being called into the Pack House to determine their futures in leadership and what they would be doing.

Every day after lessons or taking walks through the woods, Clara would find me. She'd smile and try to make me feel better. Bringing me cupcakes or cookies. She knows I love baked goods—they tend to remind me of my mom and dad—but it didn't matter what she would do...I was miserable.

Every morning, there's a pain in the pit of my stomach. My wolf cowering in the back of my mind. Sullen and depressed. Curled up into a ball like she's been caged in a zoo. I wish I could do something. I wish I could just disappear into the back of her mind and act like nothing else around me exists. But she doesn't even want to shift anymore.

I'm already having to battle with myself. I feel deflated and worthless. Clara and I used to dress up as princesses growing up. We couldn't wait to meet our price charming. Now I've supposedly met mine and he didn't care about the fact that the glass slipper fit perfectly on my foot. He might as well have tossed it into the trash.

I still feel a small pull towards Bren. Even though I've been avoiding him—it's unfortunately there like an itch I can't reach. It breaks me. Waking up in this pain and falling asleep with it. The only peace I seem to get is when I'm finally asleep but then the torment starts all over again.

I guess I wasn't good enough. He didn't give me a chance. He knows me...why wouldn't he at least try? Maybe I'm not pretty enough. No, that's stupid. I'm just weak. I'm not the strongest female in the pack. Despite not being the weakest, I'm just average. And if there's something I know about Bren it's that he always wants to overachieve. Just not with me by his side.

After a few days, I started getting the looks. Clara noticed first but didn't want to tell me. I can feel the looks on me when I'm walking to training or sitting in a classroom. I hear the whispers that go on from afar. Bren told someone because I know Clara would never.

"Mia," Clara says as we're on the way to our weekly pack dinner. It'll be the first time I'll see Bren since he rejected me. Every weekly dinner is accompanied by a speech from the Alpha.

My eyes are focused on the ground as we approach the dinner hall, "What's up?"

"We don't need to go to dinner tonight." Clara emphasizes. "We can go back to my place, watch some movies. Eat ice cream, I bought your favorite, double fudge brownie."

I shake my head, wishing the world would swallow me whole. My self-esteem has never felt so low. I feel like a hollow shell and no matter what, I'm never going to be fulfilled. It sounds so stupid to think. I thought I was better than this. Someone strong and confident because I'm smart and enthusiastic. I've now been reduced to a mate-less werewolf. A broken girl who just wants love.

Fuck...

Clara and I take our seats in the back. A few people walk by—looking directly at me. Then a few girls walk behind us. I recognize them instantly, my friends from our courses. The girl who beat me in the Ceremony, Olive, walks towards us. She licks her lip hesitantly, eyes meeting mine.

In a soft voice she mutters, "I'm sorry Mia."

I can't be angry. I can't get riled up. Even she seems to be scared. Rejections never happen. Especially with Alpha's. Any Luna's role is to make a pack stronger. It's to help the Alpha lead and be the best Alpha he can be. Rejections don't happen...at least that's what I believed.

"It's okay." I answer her quietly. Pushing down humiliation as she walks away with our friends.

Clara scrunches up her face like she's eating a sour candy. Leaning towards me she says, "We should go make face with the King. This is frowned upon. Why the fuck did Bren do this?"

"I don't want to go to the King." I say quietly.

"Mia—"

"No," I snap instantly. A burning sensation suddenly hitting the back of my throat. I force myself not to cry, letting my hair fall down to cover half my face. "I don't want to be with someone who doesn't want me, Clara."

"But Mia..." Her voice trails off. Taking a deep breath, she manages to say something I know she's been holding back for a few days. The unspoken rule as to why everyone feels sorry for me. "Alpha Bren needs you. You're an Alpha's mate. Without you, our pack will be weak. You know that. We all need you."

I decide not to reply. I have nothing to say to it. Alpha Bren clearly thinks that I'm not strong enough to lead a pack. Which means he truly believes that the pack is stronger without me instead of with me. If it wasn't humiliating already to be rejected, it's only worse knowing I was considered to be an inadequate Luna.

"We need to go protest to the King." Clara insists, "Bren is being stupid."

"Drop it, Clara." I growl at her. This seems to catch her off-guard. Her eyes widening and hands going in the air in surrender. Even my wolf has no energy to spend on trying to gain audience from the King over this. Bren wasn't wrong when he said the King is preoccupied with other matters.

We hear the chime of the bell. Turning our attention to the front of the pack. The higher members aligned at the front table where Alpha Bren holds the lead seat. His Beta stepping forth towards the microphone to go over any notes we all need.

It was the typical message we get every week. "Focus on your training" or "Don't forget that strength means victory" and other corny phrases. Finally, the microphone is handed to Bren.

My heart skips a beat seeing him. Even my wolf finally seems to show signs of life as the pull between us begins to tug again.

Bren looks down at the microphone, everyone waiting for the Alpha to speak. His eyes—briefly—meet mine. He looks away—almost embarrassed and ashamed it happened. I decide to look down from then on.

"As many of you know," Bren begins speaking. "I found my mate earlier this week."

Murmurs start spreading through our pack. A few eyes turning to me as if completely aware of who Bren is speaking about. The rumor mill must be turning crazy in the pack for everyone to already take the plunge. I can hear a few people whispering my name.

Without any faze whatsoever, Bren continues. "I believe that there is a stronger Luna that can lead our pack. Someone with the physical tenacity to charge into battle with us should we be needed. We are the strongest pack in the world, and someone weak cannot be leading us."

Bren puffs his chest slightly as pride seems to swell amongst him and the pack. Everyone nodding along with his words like they completely understand why I don't belong. I start sinking deeper into my bench, my chest feeling like it's about to capsize.

I never thought I was that weak. I might not be the strongest or biggest wolf, but if I was as weak as Bren is portraying me to be, then I would have been kicked out years ago. Weakness isn't tolerated here. I have my strengths, they're just not the extent they want it to be.

The eyes glancing at me feel intense. The pressure of everyone knowing suddenly weighing on my shoulders. I feel Clara reach for my hand under the table, giving me a reassuring squeeze.

"You're not weak." She whispers to me. I make eye contact with her, and I can see the anger flashing in her eyes like a fire.

Bren is lost in some motivational speech about how we're the strongest. How our strength and valor help us become the best pack. How we need to be warriors and nothing more.

I can't help but look at the people surrounding him at the large table. His Beta Jake, some other elders that we're meant to respect in our pack because they were basically gladiators back in the day. Is Bren really the one who had any say in this? Does he truly believe I'm nothing or are his strings being pulled?

Just as the sun begins to set, Bren clears his throat. "I have one more announcement to make," Bren says just as we're about to leave. "To ensure that our pack remains the strongest. To ensure that I provide only the best to all of you. It has been agreed that I will be mated with the strongest female of our pack."

On cue, Emery Gates, the winner of our Ceremony steps onto stage. A round of applause going out like a celebrity couple were walking the red carpet.

"Motherfucker," Clara curses under her breath. Her jaw clenched and I see her eyes suddenly go black.

I reach for her. Partially to calm her down. The last thing we need is for her to wolf out and rip out Emery's neck. I'm also trying to calm myself down.

How could he do this to us? I think to myself.

My wolf might as well have been pierced with silver and wolfsbane. She goes so limp in my head that it physically hurts like I've doubled over. My breath starts to pick up as I watch Emery walk towards Bren's side. They hold each other's hands and that's what begins to make me visibly sick.

Oh my God, I think to myself. I'm going to throw up.

I can't. Not here. Not with everybody watching. Some eyes are already glancing at me like they're waiting for me to break.

No.

Pull yourself together Mia.

Pull yourself, fucking, together.

Anger begins to stir in the pit of my stomach. Feeling my wolf so dejected, replaced, and heartbroken. If this was Clara, I would be standing up for her. I would be the first person to put myself out there to make sure my friend wasn't getting hurt. And here I am, cowering.

I take a deep breath. I stand up and begin to clap alongside the pack. Some people's eyes widen, but I keep my glare on Bren.

I stand there, clapping slowly. Everyone around me gradually sitting back down. But I stay standing. Letting the noise of my claps echo through the clearing far long after everyone is already done. It practically sounds like little bombs going off with how quiet it's gotten. Almost like the owls and crickets themselves have decided to go silent.

Bren's eyes are narrowed at me. His Alpha Aura beginning to radiate as his displeasure grows. I can't be bothered to look at Emery. God, I don't give a shit about Emery. If she wants to be with someone who isn't meant for her, kudos to her. She's never once done anything hurtful towards me, but what kind of sadistic bitch takes a place as Luna when they haven't even found their mate yet.

I finally finish clapping, grabbing someone's glass on the table. I'm not sure what's in it, but it's red and smells like wine. Raising it quickly I say, "To the strength of the pack."

I chug it down before dropping the glass haphazardly and taking my seat. My eyes never wavering from Bren. Even from the very back, I can see his jaw clenching and unclenching like he's trying to figure out what to do.

Jake stands up beside his Alpha, taking his position from the microphone. Bren and I's staring contest creating tension in the air that can be cut through with butterknife. "To the strength of the pack," Jake toasts with his own glass.

Everyone raises their glasses. Jake clears his throat, "Dismissed."

I keep grounded in my seat as everyone around me begins to leave. Clara stays by my side, the corner of her lips raised in a smirk. She knows very well I've pissed off the Alpha. But what more could he possibly do?

Jake and Emery try to console Bren. The anger pulsing off of him, I could almost see the waves of red. With a few words of encouragement, Bren takes a few deep breaths. Just as the last of our pack is out of earshot, he beings to stalk towards me despite Emery trying to hold him back. He brushes her off, practically stomping his way.

"What the fuck was that?" Bren seethes.

"Fuck you." I spit back. My wolf practically faints in my head. She seriously cannot believe I dropped the F-bomb on the Alpha.

"How fucking dare you disrespect your Alpha." Bren's eyes turn black, his breathing getting heavier. "You're going to regret ever stepping foot here. You fucking hear me, Mia."

His fists are clenched to his sides, I can tell he's trying to prevent his wolf from coming out, but the tips of his canines are slightly sharper than they were before. When he says my name, it's laced in venom.

I slowly stand up in front of him. Letting my own anger give me courage to get up in his face. Clara backs me up, but Bren doesn't even seem to notice. She might as well be a pesky fly to him.

I look him dead in the eyes, "You're going to regret rejecting me, Bren. You're not as strong as you think you are."

I don't want to piss him off too much or his wolf is going to come out and bite my head off. Bren's wolf is not something I want to cross. He's huge, aggressive, and temperamental. I quickly turn on my heels, holding my head up as I grab Clara's arm and drag her alongside me.

I hold my composure enough to walk calmly out of the clearing, but my heart is racing a million miles a minute. It's only once we're out of sight and hearing range that I turn towards a bush and puke my guts out. Clara rubbing my back soothingly.

"You're badass, Mia." Clara reassures me. "Don't you fucking forget it."

I wipe the back of my hand across my mouth. The anger basically gone from my body alongside the vomit. Now I'm just tired and drained. I feel the reality hit me that Bren is going to be mated with Emery all because of what? Because of the standard in our pack that physical strength is the only strength? What about mental? Emotional?

I glance down at my wrist where I'm supposed to have my ceremonial mark. The pack mark that I've been wishing for my whole life. Relief floods me as I realize, I don't have to be here. My wolf begins to panic in my head. The thought of going rogue jolting her out of her depressed trance.

"I have to leave." I say to Clara just above a whisper.

She starts shaking her head, "No. You need to stay. You need to be around for when Bren comes to his senses."

"No Clara," I rub my face. "He's publicly humiliated me in front of the entire pack. They're only ever going to look at me like...like some sort of pup."

"What if you leave and people think that's weak?" She counters. "Mia, we need you! You're the true Luna, not Emery."

My breath goes shaky as I stare out into the forest. I can't stay here and watch my mate get on with another werewolf. The only person is Clara. My parents aren't even here. They're gone.

I turn to Clara, her frustration suddenly turning into sadness. Her bottom lip starts to quiver. She knows what I'm thinking. She knows she can't change my mind.

"Mia," Her eyes start to water. "You can't really go."

I take a deep breath. The shame is pushing me down into the ground. I doubt I'll be able to overcome this if I don't put some distance between us. It's almost too much to bear being surrounded by people who either won't respect me or will pity me. I'll never be Mia again. Just 'Alpha Bren's rejected mate.'

"I have to Clara." I begin to pull her towards my house. "I need a fresh start."

Clara doesn't say anything as we walk back to my house. She even helps me pack a small backpack with essentials before walking me towards the edge of the forest. I'll miss the flatlands here. We're not so north after all. I'll miss the river and the beautiful clearings. A change could be exactly what I need.

By the time I'm standing in front of the edge of the forest, the moon is shining brightly. It took much longer to pack my essentials than I thought.

Suddenly, I feel Clara's arms wrap around me into a close embrace. She sniffles against my shoulder, and I realize how much it's going to hurt not waking up next to her every day when our alarms go off. How I'll miss our weekends together, our gossips about the members of our pack. How I'll miss running with her through the woods and swimming in the river.

"Take this," She quickly takes off her necklace. It's a pendant I got her on her eighteenth birthday. Something small but everlasting to showcase how much we care for one another.

I gently place it in my backpack as to not break it once I shift, smiling sadly and keeping my composure so I don't start crying. "I'll call you when I'm safe, okay?"

Clara nods, "Okay. Take care of yourself, Mia. I know how strong you are."

I give her another quick hug before turning around. I turn my back towards the pack I've called home my whole life. The pack where my mate is currently residing. I pull the straps of my backpack, looking up at the full moon to give me light into the dark forest.

I feel the wolf inside me stir nervously. Mixed emotions running through her, realizing that we'll no longer be strength in numbers if not strong alone. There's only one place I think we can go. I let her take over my body, landing on four paws instead of two feet. Taking my backpack into my mouth, I start running into the forest.