Lilith

"You were gone yesterday,"

I grumbled from my window as he spoke. I got up. There wasn't much outside excluding the lawnmowers and waterers anyways.

I stood to face him. "Yeah, and?"

"And the day before, and on Saturday, and almost all last week."

"Can I not leave my house?" I argued.

"I didn't say that. It's just odd that all of a sudden you're leaving frequently AND unattended. Your father would be throwing a fit if we had not been covering for you."

"And I'm grateful for that, really. But it's really none of your business."

He groaned. "Lilith."

"Loke," I mocked. "I'm safe, you don't have to worry about that. You'll still be in good graces with my father."

"It's not just that. We also want to make sure you're safe, and we can't ensure that if you won't tell us who you're hanging out with every day."

I thought back to the time at Maria's, when Natsu warned me of how easy it would be for him to make me disappear. How he could break my phone or worse. Would it really be so bad to tell someone who I was with, at least?

But Loke is an employee directly under my father. He must follow all of his orders to keep his job, even if it means betraying our friendship. And once my father found out, it would all be over.

"Hey, we've kept your sneaking out a secret for like two weeks now. I think we deserve some credit here."

That was true. If he had truly cared about his job, he would've said something by now.

I huffed. Fine. "I'm going out with Noah."

"Noah?" Loke's eyes bulged. "As in Davis? As in Zayn's brother?"

I pinched the bridge of my nose. Dramatic. "Yes."

"And going out as in courting?"

"No." I shifted. To be honest, I wasn't really sure what we were yet.

"Lilith, you know you can't do that right? You're about to be married."

"Don't you think I know that?" I snapped, and Loke backed down. "Sorry, it's just that's all everyone talks about over here, I don't need another reminder. At least Noah doesn't bring it up all the time."

"Does Noah know you're engaged?"

"....no."

"Lilith!"

"I know, I know, it's bad. But I don't know how I'm supposed to bring it up. Yeah, I'm going out with you, but I also have a fiancé. How would that sound?"

Loke sucked his teeth and shook his head. "Look, I don't know how, but you need to tell him before things get serious. He and his brother have a tendency to get angry quickly. And you don't want to be on either of their bad sides, especially not all at once."

I huffed, and flopped on my bed. "I don't even know the guy."

"You don't know Noah, either." Loke snarled.

I slowly turned my head towards the guard, who's fists were tightened and brows were tense.

"Loke?" my voice was soft.

He loosened up. "Sorry, it's just that all of these guys are just using you. You don't deserve a lowly crime lord or an old, greasy man. You deserve..."

"I deserve to choose." I stood from my bed and walked towards the tense guard. "I deserve to choose who I want to spend the rest of my life with. And yeah, I don't really want to be given away to a stinky old man. I don't really want it to be Noah either. I just enjoy going out. Doing fun things. Breathing. Living. You should respect that."

Loke shook his head. "You don't know him like I do. You don't see the way he kills, the way he murders and steals with no regret. You don't see the Salamander that's on Alvarez's most wanted."

Loke walked towards the door. "I don't even know how you two met. I'm not sure I want to know."

"Does it really matter?" I put a hand on his shoulder. "Loke I'm... I like being around him. Should I not? Is it wrong to hang out with him?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying."

"Then what are you saying, Loke," I blocked the door by standing in front of it, forcing him to say what was on his mind. "What is it that you're so afraid to say?"

"It's nothing."

I pointed at his balled fist. "It must be something if you're getting so worked up about it. If you don't want to talk about it you are more than free to-"

"None of them will care for you like I do!" he erupted. "None of them see how caring you are, or how you love even those as cruel as your father. None of them know you like I do.. so.."

When Loke and I were kids, playing in the gardens, he would always pretend to be my guard, even before he was one. He'd wave a stick like some mighty sword, and strike multiple imaginary villains. He'd go on and on about how I was his princess and he'd never let a strand on my head be harmed.

For the most part, I pretended it was just for play. Until he became a very real guard on my father's very real celestial twelve defense team.

His constant worrying, constant support, constant listening, constant playful flirting that I mistook for jokes. They were all signs. But, I couldn't force myself to accept his feelings, no matter how much I cared for him. Especially now that I had Noah.

"I'm sorry you feel that way," was all I managed to get out. I shamefully stepped to the side.

Loke, distraught, wiped his tears and rushed out of my room. My heart hurt for him, but mostly, I feared what he would say about my situation out of anger or rejection. And that made my guilt ten-times worse.

***

The man I sat across from was worse than I could've imagined. His hair was shiny with excess grease and slicked back. His fingers were dirty and grubby; from his government occupation, personal activities, or bad hygiene I couldn't tell. I could tell that he was old; wrinkles, splotchy skin, gray hair and all. He wore a smug, ugly cheshire grin that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand.

"Lilith," my father had said. "Meet your fiancé."

When I didn't speak, because I thought I wasn't allowed to yet, my father pushed me forward.

I righted myself before I could fall over, and stood politely in front of the man. "Hello... I am Lilith Heart. It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance Mr. Blanchet."

I shook hands with the stranger, and was appalled when my hands came in contact with his sweaty, sticky ones. I fought a recoil in fear of looking disrespectful.

He grinned at my submissiveness, and said: "Well, aren't you a doll? You can call me Hubert."

The man had a guard standing on the wall a few feet behind him, just as I had Loke standing behind me. Loke's presence behind me should've given me comfort and security, but now it just brought dread.

The whole situation brought dread.

"Ah, what a beautiful and youthful daughter you have, Mr. Heart." Mr. Blanchet said, taking a seat,

"Thank you. I tried my hardest." my father spoke plainly. "Thank you for agreeing to the marriage as well. Looking for suitors has been quite a burden for me,"

"No worries! I get the favor of the strongest Alvarez forces and a beautiful wife, while you get to keep your close ties in politics. Everyone benefits."

My father nodded in agreement. I bit my tongue. Everyone but me.

"So, Miss Heart. Tell me about yourself. I heard you are studying law?"

"Yes, sir."

He grinned. "Want to get into politics? I must say, as someone deep into politics myself, it is a messy game. Far too messy for someone of your... stature."

I narrowed my eyes. "I think anyone can do well in any field they choose. Including politics. Even people of my stature." I spewed the word as if it was poison.

Or, that was what I had wanted to say. Instead, I blinked at him.

My father cleared his throat, and my posture immediately straightened, pulling at the tight fit of my dress. I had to speak. I gave the politician an appeasing smile. "Of course, I have such kind men that are willing to support me."

He stared. "Well, of course. As my wife you will be treated well. If you stay as lovely as you are now, you will never have to work a day, I can assure you. Bought everything your youthful little heart desires."

As if money could make this situation any better. Money was the reason I was here in the first place. Money was the reason my father was marrying his teenage daughter off to a politician that was far too old. Money was the reason I spent my childhood alone. Money had consumed my father, and I would be damned if I let it consume me too.

Besides, I thought. What would happen if I lost my loveliness? If I grew fangs and bit back? Would I keep my position? Or would I be tossed out at the sight of a newer, younger, more naive victim?

My smile tightened, my fists balling under the table cloth. "How nice of you. Thank you."

My father looked at his watch absentmindedly. "These servants are taking too long," he announced, standing from his seat at the head. "I will go see what the hold up is about. Pardon me,"

He took big strides towards the double-door exit, not sparing one glance back at me. Why would he? He knew I knew how to behave. He trusted that I wouldn't screw things up for him. As much as I despised that confidence, it was true. It was one strength my father was proud to proclaim.

I knew how to follow orders.

My father shut the doors behind him, leaving the three of us alone. I focused on anything I could to fill up the awkward silence that had fallen. The draped curtains that fell over the large windows. The distant fireplace that gave off a comforting, yet not necessary orange glow. The shining chandelier above us that was so heavy I wondered why it did not plummet and wreak havoc on us all.

That wouldn't be too bad, I supposed. At least I could get out of this stupid dinner.

"So, Miss Heart. I'm afraid I'm still unfamiliar with you. As my future wife, this cannot be the case."

"So..."

"So tell me more. About your home duties and such. Do you like to cook? Or is cleaning your passion? Or... do you like more indecent hobbies?" he leaned across the table to whisper in my ear. "Don't worry, your fathers not here. I won't say a word. It'll be our little secret, hm?"

"Um..." I shifted, and I felt Loke stiffen behind me. "As I told you before, I am deeply engrossed in my studies. That is mostly what I am up to these days, sorry."

"That's all?" The man whined like a child cheated out of a contest. "I've heard so much about you young kids nowadays. Going out, wearing skimpy clothes, drinking and whatnot. Do you truly do none of that?"

"No, sir."

"How innocent," he was amused. "What about boyfriends? I'm sure you've had so many chances. Well, I don't know if you have any now, but you'll have to break up with whoever you're with. I'm not fond of sharing."

The answer to that question was no. It had always been no. My father was barely interested in my caged life, but the one thing he had emphasized was no boyfriends. It was why Loke had been rejected when we were thirteen, my father immediately turning down his proposal to take me out of the house.

It didn't matter if Loke was someone he trusted. Lilith Heart dating anyone without strong connections did not make economical sense.

But somehow, even though the thought of a relationship had never come up in our conversations, I found myself thinking of that brown-haired criminal with that stupid all-knowing smirk.

I thought of how I had managed to wipe it off by handing him all the cards in the deck.

I thought of how I had managed to beat him repeatedly since then.

Forget the economics, it didn't make emotional sense to part with someone I was just getting to know as a friend. Boyfriend or not.

"No boyfriends," I said finally, feeling Loke's stare of disapproval hot on my back.

"Ever?"

"If you would Mr. Blanchet," I shut down any further inquiries about my romantic past. It was frankly none of his business, politeness be damned. Loke hummed in agreement behind me.

"I find myself a little uncomfortable."

Mr. Blanchet narrowed his eyes. "I simply want to know about your experience, no need to get hostile."

"My apologies. Can we return to chatting about my studies? I am much more passionate about that."

"Passion is not a good thing for someone as naive as you to have." he recollected himself, straightening his utensils and taking a sip of champagne. "But your tongue tells me all I need to know. You are obviously inexperienced when it comes to being at the right hand of a proper man. But that is quite alright. I am more than willing to educate you on anything Mr. Heart might have missed. You certainly do not want to end up like my old wife."

"Your old wife?" I inquired, wanting to divert his attention off me. It wasn't such a hard thing to do. Politicians loved talking about themselves, especially self-centered ones like Mr. Blanchet.

"Yes, the old hag." he scowled. "Spoke my ear off. Wanted to get involved in politics too, actually. Honestly, it's a good thing she was excellent at house work, else I would've gotten rid of her a long time ago."

"You don't have to worry about her, though. She's long gone."

It's not her I have to worry about. I shivered at his last words.

"Ah, I've gotten off topic again! You're really good at that, Miss Heart. No mind, though. We'll have plenty of time to get to know eachother better."

Goosebumps traveled like tiny spiders up my arms. Mr. Blanchet smiled.

Before Loke could step forward and intervene, the servants burst from the double doors on cue, flooding the room with various servants holding various platters. My father stood above the chaos, taking silent steps back to his seat.

"Sorry for the wait," said Mr. Heart. "The servants are ready to serve you now."

Mr. Blanchet clapped in delight as the food was delivered. He grabbed at the various entrees and appetizers before the servants could place their plates. He stuffed his mouth at such a pace, that I was surprised at how his throat and stomach kept up.

"Why, Ms. Heart," he said with an open mouth. "You haven't touched a thing! Don't be afraid to eat, you'll have plenty of chances to work it off later."

I shook my head. "Thank you, but I'm fine Mr. Blanchet. I'm afraid I don't have much of an appetite."