"Sadie, Jaxon is at the door-

"Tell him she's taking a bubble bath with, a bottle of Champaign, and won't be out at least in another hour" I cut her off, as I shove another spoon full of muesli into my mouth. The high fat buildup, and carb accumulation wasn't stopping me from letting my lips part to welcome such food into my throat. Suddenly having tasted it for the first time in a long time, felt rare and rather euphoric. I had eaten something a normal teenager ate, and I'd done it for dinner. Part of me didn't care, part of me said I'd have to saddle up for normal life soon again, yet some part of me aid, this is the life you need. But I struggled to know what I needed, because I didn't know myself enough to answer that.

Mother rolls her eyes as she stomped from the main doors to the kitchen where she'd found me lurking, she stood with her hands against her hips and a very furious face. "For god's sake Sadie, what has gotten into you? Eating cereal, at seven in the evening? You won't even tell me why you're not going to prom. And suddenly you're telling everyone that comes by that you're having a bubble bath?" I shrug, not seeing any problem with avoiding people, Mother used to do it when I was little. She made me trot against the telephone and tell them she was getting a tan and couldn't talk at the moment. What had made mine so different? At least mine wasn't a completely lie, I do plan on having a bubble bath soon with a glass of Champaign. I had class, at the least.

My mother exclaims scolding at my unusual behavior. I sigh against her tone, completely not interested in her conversation. "It's not like you ever pondered about me" I mutter. It was true, if she'd been worried of me, where had she been the last seventeen years since my birth? All she'd ever worried about was, about what people thought about me, not about what she thought about me.

She scoffs, waving her hands into the air, making her summer blouse move along with them.

"Of course, I care! You're my daughter" She explains, as if it ever had been a barrier to anything, she'd made me do.

"But that's about it, you care because you have to. You care about how much food I consume, what I'm wearing, who I am friends with, what my grades are. Do you ever how am I doing?"

She'd looked offended, taken aback by my question. "How can you even ask me that-

"I want to know" I cut her off suddenly, curious about whether my Mother ever worries about me? I'd grown up, and all I ever wanted to do was please my parents, but did they even acknowledge that?

She looked over at me, seeing that I am not giving in. I wanted to know, and I would go nowhere if she hadn't told me.

"I know it may not seem like it, but I do" She says, suddenly her tone, had been sincire.

I put down my bowl, and looked over at her. "It would feel pretty good if you showed it sometimes." I shrugged suggesting.

"I didn't think you would want it. You father raised you to be love resistant, honey. I thought my affection would drive you further away from me than bring you closer" she admits tears glimmering beneath her eyes.

"Of course, not Mother. All I ever wanted from you was to love me. You're all I have when dad's travelling. I want my mother to yell at me when I wear short skirts or too much make up, because even if it will drive me mad, at least my mother cares enough to tell me.

My mother never was one to break down, but now it had taken her good will power not to break in front of me. Unlike her, my tears rested on my cheeks.

She looks over at me opening her mouth to speak, suddenly closing it abruptly, and then again opening it, "I am so sorry Sadie. It's all too hard to explain right now, but I want you to know that I-

But she hadn't had the time to finish it as I'd rushed over to her crushing her in an embrace. I'd hugged her, and it was the first time in almost seven years. I Surely shocked, it took her a while to return the embrace, and once she did, I'd felt a drop touch my head. 

"I want you to know I love you" She finishes in a croaked voice.

I smiled under her embrace. "I love you too mom"

I'd let go, as we'd both wiped away you tears.

"Now, go tell Jaxon, you're done with your bubble bath, because he might actually wait for you here all day" She laughs recovering from an emotional roller coater.

I sniffed, raising my arm to wipe off my tears "I suppose"

I'd nodded smiling her way before walking out the room, and walked over the main doors who indeed had a patient Jaxon waiting for me.

"Hey" He says suddenly happy to see me.

"Hey you" I laughed, still drying my eyes discretely.

"How are you feeling? Sorry again" He laughs nervously trying to cover up his wild concern of seizure. I waved it off.

"I'm surviving" I laughed slightly, trying to lighten the rather depressing mood. "But I'm okay, don't sweat it" I assure him. I didn't need to make him feel guilty anymore. When then stood in complete silence as neither of us had anything to say. I looked over at him expecting a reason for his appearance, but took a look at his outfit and creased my forehead.

"Do you need something? And why are you all dressed?" I question his all black suit and combed up hair, and he'd smelled like cologne. Totally not Jaxon, but then again neither was anything he'd done all week.

"Why aren't you all dressed? It's prom?" He rediverts my question.

Suddenly remembering today was Saturday, the Saturday where people can show off the dresses, they've bene hiding to wear for weeks. It was prom. "Oh right. Because I'm not going" I mention casually, but he'd gone completely ballistic.

"What!? But you've been waiting all year for this?"

I simply shrug. "I don't know, just don't feel like it"

He furrowed his eyebrows, probably wondering what rock had hit my head that hard to have made me want to stay home on the moment important day of Junior year "But what about Connor?"

Of course, he'd mentioned him. To be honest I had a feeling he'd already known about it. Guys talk. But if he'd known why did he have to ask. But I had known Connor was in the right hands. I'd left it on a clean slate.  At least it wasn't a nasty breakup. "I think he'll be just fine" I mention agreeing with myself.

He laughs slightly shaking his head. "You didn't have to do that-

"I know. I didn't do it for him, or anyone else. I did it for me. There so much I didn't know about myself Jaxon, I didn't know I could eat cereal at seven in the evening, which is super cool by the way. But that made me realize that if I couldn't figure myself out, then how do I expect to learn about someone else?" I question rhetorically sending Jaxon's mouth flying open.

"Wow, I am actually really scared right now" He laughs making me playfully hit his shoulder. I was scared too, but at least I knew what I was doing.

"Stop saying that or you'll make me regret it" I mention, friskily.

Suddenly a streak of silence had walked by sending a rather very awkward atmosphere as we'd both just stared all over the place.

He cleared his throat suddenly getting consumed by the hush. "Anyway. I am on my way to school, and I thought I'd see if you were interested to come with me since you'd love to walk all sweaty to prom with me" He chuckles, getting a look at his watch.

"I think I'll take a rain check on this one. I don't want to impose on anyone's night, plus cereal and an old classic movie is the best combination" I shrug entertaining him with what I had planned for tonight. It wasn't the night I had imagined a few weeks ago, but it was defiantly better than it.

His face suddenly had lowered its smile laughing nervously he shrugs scratching the nape of his neck. "Oh okay. Well, I guess I'll be heading off then" his thumb points behind him nad I nod givng him approval to leave me and go.

"Yeah don't want to keep Willa waiting" I mention, remmebring that at least Jaxon had a date to go with. His life unlike mine, was pretty much better.

"Yeah well it's not me she's waiting for" He winces at the call of her name, making me furrow my eyebrows. What had that meant?

"What?"

"She and Nathan are kind of hitting it again" He mentions taking it rather very humbly than I'd expected. What on earth? I gasped suddenly furious. 

"She did not-how dare she-she. Left you? For him?" I'd kept cutting myself off trying to process it all, but I knew she wasn't loyal, it was Jaxon that had been all blinded.

"Yeah, I'm over it, wasn't really long a long game relationship plan anyway" He shrugs, knowing that he was actually very hurt. He'd loved her, and suddenly she was gone. It was truly a tragedy that was to some people expected, and some others blinded.

"Oh, I am so sorry Jaxon, but as much as it would be morally wrong to say, I will" I smile proudly.

He'd raised his eyebrows suddenly knowing of what I was going to do. "Don't-

"I told you so" I cut him off, saying it flat to his face.

He sighed rubbing his temples. "You just had to do it" He exclaims, laughing right after wards. It was true, and he'd know it. Maybe I wasn't always right, but I had wisdom, and Jaxon had better listen to it if he wanted to survive life.

I mock his irritation. "Couldn't resist it" I nod. Resting my shoulders against my side of the door. I

"Anyway, catch you later" He mentions, realizing he'd spend most of his hours he could have used to dance, with me. I nod this time actually letting him go off.

"Looking forward to it" I joke as he'd walked the pavement.

"Really?" He questions turning around suddenly curious.

"No" I blurt out of with laughter.  I wave him off, and slowly close up the doors, and breathed in deeply.

At least one from the two of us will have a night to tell of. Going to prom for me meant drama. And I think I'd enough that could last me a life time. Prom would be yesterday's news. Surely posted over social media for a few days, but then all is gone, and life returns. And whether you'd killed it on a peach ankle length strapless dress or whether you'd spent your prom night eating cereal in your pajamas as you watch movies, it wouldn't matter. At least it didn't matter much to me. Because even if I do still care, I didn't care as much now about what people would say. Because they are not me, and I am definitely not them.

I stretched my arms, and ruffled my already messy hair. Done with that, I'd planned to go back to my meal, before playing a movie. But as I'd stepped a single foot, the doors have knocked, sending a rather confusing expression towards me.

Who on earth was that?

I'd sighed, feeling a bit lazy but I'd opened the knob, face to face with none other than

"Jaxon? I thought I'd just seen you go?" I laughed confused as to why was again standing by my door, like we just didn't have a conversation and ended it minuets ago.

He had felt nervously casual, and waved slightly. He'd walked in abruptly making me knit my eyebrows.

"Hey, do you think you have another bowl, I think I'm suddenly up for cereal" He question, with a grin.

I'd grinned back at him. "I think I can take a look for you" I reply.

Though, I'd lost a lot over the few past weeks. Struggling to make a sheared life as perfect as one could made.  I'd lost more than I had gained. Yet through the midst of it all there was one thing I'd managed to make.

A friend.

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Hello my dears!

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