Newt.

My heart shattered. It took everything in my not to sink to my knees in historical sobs.

Newt looked horrible. His hair had been torn out in patches, leaving bald spots that were nothing more than red welts. Scratches and bruises covered his face; his shirt was ripped, barely hanging on to his thin frame, and his pants were filthy with grime and blood. It was like he’d finally given in to the Cranks, joined their ranks fully.

But he stared at Thomas, and me as if he recognized that he’d stumbled upon friends.

"Newt!" I whispered, my hands held over my mouth.

Thomas didn't say anything, he just stood frozen to the spot. This was the boy his heart loved. It broke my heart to see the dispare in his eyes.

I slid my hand into my pocket. I felt the syringes. I gripped them tight. I had to. I had to try! What's the worst that could happen? It doesn't work...and he's no worse off.
Freaking awful happy thought. .but if I don't I'll regret it for the rest of my life!

Newt stood alone in the middle of the intersection. Away from the other past gone cranks. I took a few cautious steps towards him. I walked half the distance to Newt, then stopped. The worst part about my dear beautiful gentle friend was the wildness in his eyes. Madness lurked behind them, two festering pools of sickness. How had it happened so quickly?

“Hey. Newt. It’s me, Charlie  You still remember me, right?”

A sudden clarity filled Newt’s eyes then, almost making me step back in surprise.

"I bloody remember you, Charlie. You just made me jump out a buggen' window, rubbed it in that you ignored my note. I can’t go completely crazy in a few hours."

Those words hurt my heart even more than the pitiful sight of Newt. I continued talking I quiet tone, my hand still holding the syringes tight in my pocket.

"Then why are you here? Why are you with … them?" I indicated with my head at the group of wild Past Gonners.

Newt looked at the Cranks, then back at me.

"It comes and goes. I can’t explain it. Sometimes I can't control myself, barely know what I’m doing. But usually it’s just like an itch in my brain, throwing everything off-kilter just enough to bother me—make me angry."

"You seem fine right now." I gave him a small smile.

"Yeah well ..."

"Newt, come with me, right now. We can take you somewhere safer, somewhere better to-"

Newt laughed, and when he did his head twitched strangely a couple of times. “Get out of here, Charlie. Get away."

By this time Thomas finally joined me at my side. His whiskey brown eyes filled with unshead tears.

"Newt? Come with me, come back with me. Please." Thomas begged. "We’ll tie you up if it makes you feel better."

Newt’s face suddenly hardened into anger and his words shot out in a rage.

"Just shut up! Charlie, you shuck traitor! Didn't you read my note? You can't do one last, lousy thing for me? Gotta be the hero, like always? I hate you! I always hated you!"

He doesn’t mean it! He doesn't mean it.

He turned his wild eyes into Thomas, and with a twisted sneer spat some butter words at him, "And you! You coward! Can't ever do the hard things! Making everyone else make the decisions for you! Did you know I didn't trust you enough to give you that shucken death wish note! I had to give it to your sister!"

Thomas flinched. My anger flashed, and I knew Newt was sick and it wasn't him, it was the disease, but still his words were harsh and it hurt, it struck a cord.

"Newt …" Thomas almost whimpered.

"It was all your fault! You could’ve stopped them when the first Creators died. You shit them Charlie! YOU DID IT! YOU COULD HAVE STOPPED IT! You could’ve figured out a way. But no! You two had to keep it going, try to save the world, be the hero. And you came to the Maze and never stopped. All you care about is yourselves! Admit it! Gotta be the one people remember, the one people worship! We should've thrown you down the Box hole! That Griever should have taken you along with Fed and your shucken baby!"

Newt’s face had colored to a deep red, and spit flew from his mouth as he yelled. He started taking lumbering steps forward, his hands balled into fists.

"Newt, stop. Just listen to me. I know you’re okay in there. Enough to hear me out." I tried again.

His wild mad eyes fastened onto mine.

"I hate you, Charlie!”

He was only a few feet away and Thomas and I took a step backward, my hurt over Newt turning to fear.

"I hate you I hate you I hate you! After all I did for you Charlie, after all the freaking klunk I went through in the bloody Maze, you can’t do the one and only thing I’ve ever asked you to do! I can’t even look at your ugly shuck face!"

"Charlie?"

I glanced quickly behind me. Gally stood rooted to the spot, a gun pulled. He held it in both hands, not raised, but ready.

"No Gally!" I snapped. And shook my head in a sharp no.

My head snapped back to Newt. In the split second I looked away, he screamed and rushed forward, towards me.  Newt tackled me to the ground, knocking the breath out of me. I struggled to fill my lungs as my oldest dearest friend climbed on top of me and pinned me down. His hand went to my neck, and squeezed, cutting my airway. I gasped, my eyes flying open in panic.

"I should rip your eyes out," Newt said, spraying me with spit and black goo. "Teach you a lesson in stupidity. Why’d you come over here? You expected a bloody hug? Huh? A nice sit-down to talk about the good times in the Glade? All your shuck buggen' boy problems?"

Newt was suddenly ripped free. Gally had tackled him, they rolled a few times. I rolled over gasping and chocking, coughing and gasping wildly. It took me a few seconds to get my lungs under control. In that time Newt managed to get in top of Gally. No one really wanted to hurt him. He was out friend, a brother a friend, a love. Newt screamed and slammed Gally's head into the cement. Gally stilled.

"Gally!" I screamed.

Thomas screamed and tackled Newt this time, taking him away from Gally. While I scrambled over to him. He was breathing. And there was no blood. Thank heavens. He was just nocked out.

I turned to see Newt and Thomas struggling. Over something. Newt had grabbed the gun from Gally. He yanked it toward himself, forcing it up until the end of the pistol was pressed against his own forehead. I froze, only a few feet from the two.

"Now Tommy, make amends! Kill me before I become one of those cannibal monsters! Kill me!"

"No!" I screamed, getting up and scrambling over to them,

"NO! CHARLIE, I TRUSTED YOU WITH THAT NOTE AND YOU FAILED ME! COME ON TOMMY! DO IT! DO IT YOU COWARD!" He screamed.

"I can’t, Newt, I can’t." Thomas cried, tears slid down his cheeks.

"Make amends! Repent for what you did!" The words tore out of him, his whole body trembling. Then his voice dropped to an urgent, harsh whisper. "Kill me, you shuck coward. Prove you can do the right thing. Put me out of my misery."

"I can't Newt! I can't! I love you! I can't!" He sobbed.

"Look, Newt, maybe we can-" I said quietly, but Newt cut me off in a wild scream.

"Shut up! Just shut up! I trusted you Charlie! You failed me!" Newt screamed at me. "Now do it Tommy!"

"I can’t." He cried, his chest rising and falling, despite Newt sitting on his torso.

"Do it!"

"I can’t!"

"How can you ask him to do something like this? How could he possibly kill the person he loves more then himself?" I cried, maybe hoping maybe I could talk some reason I to his wild mind.

"Kill me or I’ll kill you...both of you. Kill me! Do it!"

"Newt …" I tried again. My hand clenched around the syringe. I slowly pulled it out of my pocket.

"Do it before I become one of them!" He screamed again.

Thomas's eyes were flickering back and forth between me and Newt

"I …"

"KILL ME!" And then Newt’s eyes cleared, as if he’d gained one last trembling gasp of sanity, and his voice softened.

"Please, Tommy. Please."

I lunged at them as Thomas pulled the trigger with a wild sob.

I landed with a thud. The empty syringe rolled out if my hand. White hot pain shot through my body.

A wild deranged face aopeartover me. Snarling and spitting at me

"You ruined my death! Again! Why can't you just let me die!" He screamed, his face inches from mine.

"Because...your...my friend. And...I love ..you.".

With the an effort beyond comprehension I stabbed the last syringe into his arm. The sedative took hold right away. I saw his eyes clear for a second again. I saw the regret and fear. And then they rolled up into his head and he collapsed.

I screamed in pain as he landed on me.

"Charlie!" Thomas screamed.

He shoved Newt's unconscious body off and he was leaning over me.

"Why the shuck did you do that?" He cried, panic eating away at him. His hands were shaking and I could see it in his eyes.

"Because....I can..save ..him. You couldn't...kill him!"  Every breath hurt, sending hit burning pain through my body.

"What the hell?" Someone screamed.

The rest of our group had double backed.

"Took you long enough! Where the shuck did you go?" Thomas yelled.

"We kept going! We though you were behind us! What the hell happened?" Brenda cried, dropping down beside me.

She ripped my shirt open. My shoulder was on fire and numb and shooting pain and throbbing all at the same time. The bullet went through my shoulder. She pressed down on the wound making me scream in pain, black spots danced in my vision.

"..Gally..?"

It was quiet for a second.

"He'll be okay! Zee has him, he's sitting up." Sophie said, dropping down beside me in the other side.

"Now, how the shuck do we get her and this lug back to Jorge?" Frypan asked, eyeing up the wild group of Cranks, who were still fighting over the garbage pile.

"Shuck it! Charlie! What the actual hell?! I'm out for a minute and your shot again?"

I heard Gally's exhaspirated strained voice. I tried to smile, but it turned into a grimice and a groan of pain.

"Okay, guys we'll take Newt. Gally, are you okay with Charlie? How's your head?"

He waved his hand, "fine. Worry about it once we're away safe."

He bent down and scooped me up, making me scream in pain again. My cussion and hearing blanket out for a second. Thomas, Fry and Zayn picked up Newt. Sophie and Brenda lead the way back.

Brenda pukked out a com.

"Jorge? Papi? We need you asap!"

It was dead air for a minute.

"Roger! Where are you?"

Brenda looked at Sophie.

"We can meet on top of the Resistant building!" Sophie yelled, "we should be 5-10 minutes, if we don't run into cranks!"

Brenda relayed the message. My head tipped back. Every foot fall of Gally's made pain shoot through my body. I cried and hissed in pain. My blood soked Gally's shirt. I begged my body to just take me away. The jolting and moving hurt so much. Finally my mind had enough pain, my eyes rolled into my head, my head tipped back.

"No! Charlie! No! Stay with me! Please! Charlie!" Someone screamed desperately. 

I was drawn into the sweet nothingness of blackness.