Aha!! Fake story writer returns..urf RAGINI MEHTA now Kapoor...

So people you readyy???

Badiii mehnat lagi hai😂😂 legit kaaaaafiiiiii zyaaaaadaaaa😂🙈😂🤷🏻‍♀️😂🤷🏻‍♀️...

so please please do vote and comment❣️

I would suggest read in hindi zyaada feel ayayega but for them who donot understand hindi..translations are there :)❣️

Strap your belts cause this ride is going to be hilarious..(hopeso!)

Translation in italics.

Fake story- A story based on (non) facts.

F A K E. S T O R Y
••••••••••••••••

LAKSH

Ragini was kidnapped. Thats what all of us could conclude. And as the police policy we couldn't file a report as no call for ransom was made.

So by default Sanskaar and I decided to search the jungle area, because see technically they can hide her in a city place too but jungle would be safer?

But still the city part was being searched by others, so we had everything covered.

More than the fear to find her was the fear of losing her, you know the feeling when someone/something so close to you disappears- it evokes a fear and great fear, the fear is so huge that it shakes your heart and mind to the core to that extent where you cannot judge anything properly.

Ragu, where are you?

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Ragini.

Okay see, and actually hear me out. I woke up not on my soft bed but grass, hay.

And not because of my alarm but because I heard two people shouting.

"Ayeee gawaarr!! Tunne galat ladki ko utha liya!! Yeh toh woh dakyan hai, woh doosri chori kaha hai?" I heard one man say.

(Oye idiot, you kidnapped the wrong girl, this girl is a goon/pirate. Where is the other girl?)

"Aye dekh Raplu galti hogayi. Par yaad hai na tujhe iss chori ko uss ameer dikhne wale chore ne bachaya tha. Shayad inka kuch scene chal raha hoga!" The other man said.

(See Raplu I made an error. But do you remember how the rich man saved this girl? Maybe she and that rich man have a scene going onn between them.)

Raplu?😂😂😂😂

Ek minute scene? We are married bro!

"Mein kaha hu?" I say..ready for a drama?

(Where am I?)

"Aee chori dekh saral bhaasha mein tujhe samjhate hai, hum gaye the uthane woh Tia wali chori ko aur humse uth tu gayi. Par abh aayi hui Lakshmi ko mana toh karte nahi hai..isliye abh tere pati se hum maangenge paise." One of the man says,not Raplu.

(Oye girl see in easy language we went to kidnap your friend 'Tia' but we kidnapped you instead. And now who refuses to the source of income right? So now we will ask ransom from your husband.)

"Aur bhai, iska pati kaafi maaldar lag raha tha!!" Raplu finally says.

(Your husband is very rich. He seemed so.)

Bachu you wait and watch.

"Pati? Aapne kabh mere pati ko dekha?"I act all innocent.

(Husband? You have seen my husband?)

"Arey woh dhabhe mein jo tujhe bachane aaya tha woh na.. hum ussi samay dhabe par the. Par man gaye chori kya bahadoor hai tu." Raplu says.

(The one who saved you in the dhabbha? Was your husband right? By the way you are very stong!)

"Thankyou." Par ek se second woh aadmi..buddha? Mera pati nahi tha!!" I thank and then ask dumbly?

(Thankyou..but that old man? He isn't my husband!)

"Kya??" They both ask shocked

(What?)

"Aur nahi toh kyaa. Woh toh," I fake a sob," woh toh mera boss hai. Kya batau bhai life itni kharabh hogayi hai itni kharabh hogayi hai.." I started fake crying.

Add more ghee.

(Exactly what else? He is.. my boss" I fake cry, "my life has all turned so bad. Worst." I cry.)

"Kyu behn?" Raplu asks curiously.

(Why sister?)

"Na na woh toh mein batati hu pehle Raplu bhai yeh doosre bhai ka naam kya hai? Easy padta hai na bolne mein.." I reason out.

(Na na that toh I will tell only, first tell me whats the other guys name, Raplu bhai? It is easy na to tell then.")

"Taplu." Raplu answers.

"Arrey perfect." I clap.

Great names.

"Acha abh mein batati hu aap dono ache se baith jao. Paani waani laakar du kuch?" I ask out of goodness.

But wait? Ain't I in their house? Still ache manners.

(Okay now get ready, I will tell you both everything. You both sit down first, do you need water or something?)

"Na na behn hum theek hai tu bata." Raplu bhai answers.

(No no sister we are fine, you continue.)

"Acha yeh kahani shuru hui thi kuch 25 chapters yani kuch mahine pahele. Meri nayi nayi shaadi hui thi. Mera pati," I sob quite loudly.

(Okay this started around 25 chapters back I mean some months back when I was newly married and my husband..)

"Pati nahi rakshas hai. Buddha, zulmi, atyachaari..kya batau bhai. Ma baap ne bhi mujhse bade umar ke ladke se meri shaadi karwa di." I cry again.

Hayee kya tragic story.

Laksh me loves you, though.

(He is not husband he is a monster!! Old, zulmi, atyaacahri, what all should i say? Mom and dad made me marry an old man.)

"Kyu???" They asked shocked.

(Why?)

Step 2.

"Woh bhi kya karte bhai, ghar pe bhai bhaabhi hai dono ka dimaag kharabh. Unke pandrah bache.." I tell them.

Bhai and Swara me loves you both also. And also your future kids-- bua loves you.

(What could they do? All the house duties are on me, my brother and sister-in-law are mad. They have fifteen kids..)

"Pandrah bachhe??" They scream in fear.

(Fifteen kids?)

"Ha pandrah..Solwa on the way. Unn sabka khaana peena mujh par. Aur pati bhi ek dum nithala."

(Yes fifteen and sixteen on the way. All of their's food, clothes and everything I have to sponser and arrange.. and my husband is also jobless.)

"Pati nithala?" Taplu bhai asks.

(Husband is jobless?)

"Puri tarah se phir ek bechaari abla naari kya karti batau bhai jaan kya karti yeh phool si pyaari nanhi jaan. Iss bhayankar duniya mein mujh jaise seedhi saadhi ladki ko naukri dhoondhni padi." I tell them my not so sad story.

I am seriously a great story writer re!! I should start my business.

(Completely, I a abla naari, what can I do brother? I, such a soft soul had to step feet in this world full of monsters for a job.)

"Phir?"

(Then?)

"Naukari toh naukari..woh aadmi..kya kaha tha aapne, woh maaldaar aadmi woh mere buddhe atyaachari boss hai." Now Laksh is again targeted.

Laksh me still loves you!!

(Job is a job but the man whom you mentioned as rich, he is my old, atyacchari boss.)

"Woh bhi buddha?" Taplu asks.

(He is also old?)

"Woh bhi atyachaari." Raplu asks.

(He is also atyachaari?)

Same hi hai.

"Ha bhai jaan. Dekho toh meri kismat. Woh boss nahi haiwan hai." I again fake cry.

(Yes brother!! See my luck. He isn't a boss he is also a monster.)

And continue the cry tone..,"Abh bhai kya batau..ek baar mamuli sa tail (oil) gira diya unke laptop pe, itna daanta itna beizzat kiya ki hayee kya baatau." I cry and cry.

(Now what can I tell? One time by mistake I had spilled oil on his laptop, he scolded me so so so so much. Hayee my bad luck!!)

"Itna zulmi?"

(This much cruel?)

"Arrey yeh toh kuch bhi nahi..itna daanta aur pagaar bhi nahi diya kabse. Woh kuch ameer wameer nahi hai bas duniya ke liye.." I whisper as if I am telling them a secret.

(Arrey this nothing!! That man scolds me soo much and on top of that also doesn't pay me my salary. He isn't even a cent percent rich.)

"Par usne toh tumhe bachaya na behn.."

(But he saved you..?)

"Bachaya par aapne dekha uske baad sabhke jaane ke baad woh mujhse baat karraha tha?"

(Yes he saved me but did you see after saving me he was talking to me after everyone left?)

"Haaa!!"

"Uss samaye usne mujhe yeh dhamki di ki agar yeh deal use meine nahi dilayi toh woh kaam se nikal dega." Cue a loudest cry.

(That time he warned me that if we don't get this deal he would fire me!!)

"Meri toh zindagi hi phut gayi, pati aisa jisse peene se fursat nahi.."

Koi glycerine dedo bhai!! Aasoon nahi nikal rahe!

(My life is so bad!! A husband who does nothing except drinking alcohol.)

"Tumhara pati peeta hai?" Raplu bhai asks.

(Your husband even drinks?)

"Peeta kya woh daaru se naahata bhi, meri lifeee kharabh hogayi hogayi barbaad hogayi..."

(Drinks? He even bathes using alcohol. My whole life is spoiled...!!!)

" Na behn na tu ro mat hum haina tere saath. Tera aur tere bhai bhabhi aur unke pandra bacho ka khayal hum rakhnege." They console me.

Thankyou!

(No no sister, don't cry we are there for you! We will take care of your family and the fifteen kids.)

"Solah." I correct him.

(Sixteen.)

"Ha solah." He understands.

(Yes sixteen only.)

"Bhai aapke kitne ache ho."

(Brother you are so good.)

"Na bhen mahan toh tu hai itni umar mein itne dard. Hum na jaane kya gunah kardete agar tere pati se paise maangte toh." Taplu bhai praises me.

Thankyou!!

(No sister, you are great. In this age you handle so much. Thankgod we came to know your story or we might have had committed an error by asking your husband for ransom.)

"Beta tu jaa jee le apni zindagi. Mein toh kehta hu bhaag ja un zaalimo se."

(Beta you go and live your life. Run away from those cruel people!!)

"Na na bhai us mein se ek zaalim idhar aayega. Uske saath chali jaungi. No tension." I say confidently.

I know my Laksh.

(Na na bhai, among those two zulmi one will come to save me. I will go with him only. No tension.)

"Aayega?"

(He will come?)

"Arrey aap bas ginti karo shaam se pehle woh yaha hoga."

(Arry bhai you just start counting. By evening he will be here.)

"Woh kaun hai?"

(Who is he?)

"Aye bhai jaan aap dekhlena. Aur bataye aap dono kaha se hai?"

(You will se bhai. And say? What is your hometown?)

"Hum dono abz se hai."

(We are from abz city.)

"Arrey kya baat karrahe ho bhai? Mere chachu ke chachi ki beti ki nanad ke beta ki patni ka mayka hai waha!! Hum toh rishtedaar hue bhai!!"

(Arrey what are you saying? My chachu's chachi's son's daughters' sister-in-law's son's wife is from there. We are family!!)

"Sachi behn?"

(Seriously.)

"Taplu dekha aaj mera woh sapna bhi pura hogaya. Mujhe behn milgayi." Raplu bhai says

(Taplu did you see? i got a sister!! My wish came true.)

"Wohi toh Raplu."

"Arrey bhai aap dono udaas kyu hogaye.. woh chodho abh toh aapki behn ha na abh bataye meri koi bhabhi?" Now I console them.

(Arrey why are you both sad? And say do I have any bhabhi?)

And then they blushed and nodded in a no.

Shoo shweet.

See I know I lied to them, obviously who would want their husband or bhai or any family to pay ransom. And looking at these two, they looked non professionals.

And trust me when I call them bhai-- nothing fake in that.

"Bhen you know how to play cards?"

••••••••••••••••••••

LAKSH:

Searching the entire jungle Sanskaar and I finally spotted a hut, a small one.

Deciding to try our lucks we headed towards the hut, I so hope that Ragu is here. We decided to peep through the small gap first and then enter and attack the kidnappers.

And so we did.

Only to find RAGINI PLAYING CARDS WITH HER KIDNAPPERS!

Yaar kaha se bheja hai isse?

"Sanskaar-"

"Trust me, ghar pe yeh ek hi aise hai."

We both shared looks when we say her laughing and calling those two middle aged men- bhai.

So if those two had become my saalas why attack, we decided to enter in the most prestigious way.

We knocked the door, of a kidnapper's house who still held my wife hostage just the minute differnece is my wife looks least as a kidnapped person.

One of them opened the door and smiled looking at us.

Smiled?

Bhai tu kidnapper hi hai na?

"Arrey behn, you were right two people have come." The one who opened the door screamed happily as if he was welcoming his jiju?

"Raplu, unhe andar le aa. Uss mein se ek se humhe abhi bhi baat karni padegi na!"

(Raplu, bring them inside. We need to have a conversation with one of them.)

Ek second, Raplu?😂😂

"Ha sahi kaha Taplu!"

Whats with the names?

We entered the house and were made sit on the cot infront of Ragini, who was busy eating chips.

"Ragu, you are fine na?" Sanskaar asked concerned and eyeing those two men.

You know I didn't even bother because asking her stance I knew she has made a khichdhi infront of them, which we will eat now.

"Oye bhai tu kaun?" Raplu guy asks Sanskaar.

"He is my other boss- good one." Ragini answers while Sanskaar widens his eyes at his demotion from bhai to boss.

He is new. He will get used to this khichdhi.

"Acha toh aap ache hai, aarey aap araam se baithuye but tum ZULMI PRAANI tumhe janta aaram se baithnee nahi degi!!" Taplu guy cut Raplu and directs his statement towards me.

(Ooh so you are the good one? You can sit peacefully, but YOU CRUEL ANIMAL THE NATION WON'T LET YOU SIT PEACEFULLY!!)

Okay - zulmi (tick)

Aage aane do.

"Zulmi?" Sanskaar whispers.

Beta you wait and watch abhi bahut adjectives hai.

"Acha tum. Kya dushmani hai iss komal si jaan se tumhe? Ha batao? Itni pyaari..nazuuk. Har baat par daante ho waise hi iske ghar par iss par kam zulm nahi hote jo tum daftar mein bhi aisa karte ho!!" Raplu guy angrily says.

(And you, why are you against this sweet small cute girl? She is so cute so sweet and you always keep on scolding her? Why?? She already suffers a lot in her own house, and then you again trouble her in the office?)

"Ghar par?" I ask eyeing Ragini.

(In house?)

What did she do this time?

"Aur nahi toh kya..budhe ma baap, pagal bhai bhaabhi and unke pandrah-" Taplu guy says when Raplu cuts him.

(And what? Her old parents, mad brother and sister-in-law, and their fifteen children-"

"Solah!" Raplu corrects him.

(Sixteen!!)

"Ha unke solah bache.. kaise kaise yeh nanhi jaan unhe sambhaalegi? Aur upar se uska bevda pati!" Taplu continues.

(Yes, their sixteen kids, how will thise cute girl handle them? And on top of that her drunkard husband.)

"Pagal bhai bhabhi? Aur unke pandrah-" Sanskaar says in shock when the Raplu guy again corrects his fifteen to sixteen.

(Mad brother and sister-in-law? And their fifteen-)

"Solah bache?" Sanskaar screams looking at Ragini horrified.

(Sixteen kids??)

Poor Sanskaar.

Sanskaar turns pale when I ask what happened he whispers, "I just imagined Swara with sixteen kids."

And I just controlled my self from laughing.

I can't imagine my sister with sixteen kids. Hayee bhagwaan..😂😂😂

"Wohi toh! Solah bache. Khudh toh kuch karte hai nahi, pura bojh iss nanhi jaan par." Raplu says defending my wife.

(Exactly!! Sixteen kids. They themselves toh don't earn but they have burderned this poor soul.)

"Aapne pati ke baare mein bhi kuch kaha tha?" I ask looking at Ragini.

(And you did mention her husband right?)

So this means this 'nanhi jaan' made my twin character and both negative. Matlab? Waah.

So proud bacha.

Ghar chal tu.

"Ha pati bevda!" Raplu screams.

(Yes drunkard husband!)

He is so interested dude.

"Acha aur?" I ask him to continue.

I am way to eager.

"Arrey nithala bhi toh tha!" Taplu adds.

(He is also jobless!!)

"Aur daru se nahata bhi tha, aisa kuch haina behn?" Raplu now pays attention to Ragini the great who is busy looking at us sheeplessly.

(And also bathed using alcohol. Something like that right sister?)

"Aur buddha!! Atyachaari!!" Taplu again asks.

(Also old and atyachaari!!)

Okay so oldy (tick)

Jobless (tick)

Atyachaari (tick)

Aur kuch?

"Ji bhai." She confirms and winks at me.

"Yeh kya horaha hai?" Sanskaar asks confused.

(What is happening?)

New to Ragini's favourite time pass- creating stories.

"Aur aap ache boss! Kyu iss zulmi ko iss nanhi jaan par atyachar karne dete hai?" Raplu asks Sanskaar.

(And you good boss? Why do you let this sweet soul suffer?)

"Woh..woh.. ek second yaha nanhi jaan hai kaun? I am confused?" Sanskaar asks and Ragini and I burst into laughter.

(Woh woh.. wait who is the sweet little soul here?)

Welcome to RAGINI FAKE STORY FAN-CLUB.

••••••••••••••••

So so so DID YOU FIND IT FUNNY? See I did try my beshtest besht. Now me is only hoping it was good?

And agli baar i am never writing in hindi😂😂 translating hindi to english that to the proper hindi is tooo much work😂😂 so agli baar only english chapter😂

And and me needs to know your reviews!!! So do do do please please comment and vote :)

And it was acha wala long😂🙈 so i hope it covers. And thankyou for bearing me?😂

TIA HAS ULTIMATELY BECOME THE ROOT CAUSE OF ALMOST SABH KUCH NAHI?😂😂

And last but not the least I am asking phirse..did you all like it?

Love.
Meethi❤️