Mei was 16 and was having urges. Urges to go up to Miriam and kiss her. Urges to take Miriam home and protect her. Urges to keep Miriam away from anyone who might break her heart. Urges to break Miriam up with her current girlfriend. Yeah, Miriam has a girlfriend and they've been together for about a month. They got together during the last month and school and have been inseparable since. It's gotten to the point where they hardly saw Miriam anymore. She spent her time with Marissa so often it left a bad taste in Mei's mouth.

"What kind of name is Marissa anyway!? She's going to break Mir's heart!" Mei paced around her bedroom. Abby and Priya were at their own houses, doing their own thing. Though Mei knew Priya was with the goth girl and Abby was probably punching her punching bag. The group wasn't as energized without Miriam's energy and they kinda drifted because of it.

"Ugh, Miriam can do so much better. Marissa is a jerkwad anyway," Mei scoffed at the name and sat at her desk. She slipped ok her headphones and played some music as she doodled in her notebook. Her thoughts circled around Miriam. Her smile, her hair, her skateboard, and her scent. Boy, she missed it all. Miriam still had her braces and Mei hated how much Marissa encouraged Miriam to get them off the next dentist appointment.

"If she can't accept Miriam's aesthetic, then she shouldn't be with her," All this Marissa talk made its way to Mei's hand and she began doodling Marissa. Long black her, tanned skin, dark blue eyes, and around Priya's height. Mei eyed the doodle before her brows furrowed and she aggressively scribbled all over it.

"She isn't worthy of Miriam, I am," She then began doodling Miriam. Her doodle soon became a picture as she poured her heart into it. Everything she missed about Miriam motivated her and caused her to finish the drawing when she did.

"Miriam, mon amour," Mei said fluently. She drew little hearts around the drawing and she heard knocking from her window as she did so.

"Mei, it's me!" Mei wasted no time standing up and rushing to her window. She lifted it and allowed Miriam to climb inside. Once she did, Mei closed the window and closed her notebook so Miriam didn't see her drawing.

When Miriam first started dating Marissa, Mei said she would be her biggest supporter mostly because it was a girl but also because she was Miriam's best friend. Miriam appreciated at first but soon started forgetting about Mei when she was around Marissa.

Mei compared Marissa to a drug, something Miriam couldn't stop taking.

"Hey Mir, came to hang out for once?"

"Yeah, Marissa wouldn't let me leave," Miriam said, choosing to ignore that last part. She was well aware she's been spending less time with her friends but she couldn't help it. Marissa didn't have many friends and with Miriam she hardly had anyone. It made Miriam feel bad so she vowed to stay by her side.

"Why? Something happen with... Marissa?" Mei hated the way she sounded when she said Marissa's name and she hated how Miriam offensively eyed her.

"Did she do something to you Mei?" Only take you away from me. Mei wanted so badly to say that but held back the urge to ruin what they had left of their friendship. So she just shook her head.

"No."

"Ok, so do you want to hang out today? We can go skateboarding or something," Miriam held her own hands together and rubbed her knuckles, smiling sheepishly. Mei knew skateboarding was a reference when Mei asked if Miriam could teach her. She grinned and nodded, she had a plan.

"That sounds great Mir! I'll change real quick and we can go," Miriam nodded as Mei started taking clothes out of her drawers. Was she supposed to leave or face the way, she didn't know. They've changed in the same room before, they've just faced the opposite direction to make it fair.

"Uh, Mei do you need me to leave-"

"No, it's fine! Just face the way," Mei hated how desperate she sounded but she couldn't help it. She wanted to make Marissa jealous, she wanted to alter Miriam's feelings so she felt something for her. Changing in front of her was a start.

"O-Ok," Miriam turned around quickly and stared at the wall in front of her as Mei turned so their backs were facing each other. It was when Mei started changing Miriam realized she was facing the wall with the mirror, and she could see everything. Miriam tried redirecting her eyes somewhere else but they just landed back on the mirror and eventually, she stopped trying to look away.

Miriam was mesmerized honestly. She noticed how fit Mei seemed to actually get, she looked attractive. She watched Mei reach down and put on her shirt and Miriam gasped softly. Did Mei have some abs?!

"You ok Mir?" Mei asked as she looked behind her to see Miriam. When she saw Mei turn around in the mirror she put her hands over her eyes, not knowing Mei knew she was watching her.

"Mhm! Finished?" Mei wanted to tease Miriam longer but she had a plan to activate. So she pulled her pants and hummed back.

"Yeah! Come on," Miriam removed her hands and turned around, coming face to face with Mei who smiled innocently. Miriam however couldn't say the same, she had an awfully red blush across her face and she looked dazed.

"Mir?" Butterflies.

"Mir? Hello?" Mei waved her hand in front of Miriam's face causing Miriam to blink a few times.

"Huh- oh yeah," Miriam smiled so Mei made her way to the window and closed the blinds. She expected Miriam to start leaving but she didn't even move.

"What are you doing?" Mei asked after seeing Miriam wasn't moving and still looked confused.

"Sorry, what did you say?"

"You sure you're ok? Bad thought?" Mei held her hand up and caressed Miriam's cheek. Tapping her foot against the ground rapidly, Miriam shook her head.

"L-Let's go," She quickly stepped out of Mei's grasp and bolted out of the room. She dashed past Mei's parents and ran out the front door. Mei soon came out of her room and was stopped by her parents before she left.

"What's with Miriam?" Ming asked, staring at the door Miriam swung open.

"I dunno, bad thought I guess,"

Miriam was sitting outside on the bench with her hand clutching her shirt. Her heart was pounding against her chest and she knew it wasn't because she ran. She felt guilty and ashamed of herself. She can't have feelings for her best friend, especially when she's already dating someone else. It's wrong!

"Hey, Mir," Gosh, her voice. It never used to make Miriam feel the way she felt right now.

"You ran out pretty quick," Mei stated the obvious as she sat down next to her. Miriam stopped gripping on her shirt and nodded.

"Sorry girl, you wanna skate now?"

"Yeah!" Mei transformed into her panda and Miriam climbed on her back. Mei ran down streets and climbed buildings as she made their way to Miriam's house. They still had to grab her skateboard after all.

"Mei, slow down!" Miriam whisper-yelled so Mei slowed down. They were on the roof of the house behind Miriam's so she didn't understand why Mir wanted them to stop. Until she saw Marissa, outside Miriam's house. Her eyes shrunk in fiery as Miriam slid off her back.

"Aw come on! I told her I was busy!" Even Miriam seemed upset that Marissa was here, and that was the factor that made Mei calm down. She poofed out of her panda and turned to Miriam.

"Busy with what?"

"You! I told her I was going to be with you today! I dunno why she's doing this Mei," Miriam seemed very discouraged, maybe she thought they can't skate anymore. Although Mei had an idea.

"I'll bring you down to your window and let you in,"

"Won't she see? Or hear it?"

"I'll go down and distract her," Miriam grinned. Sounded like a plan. Mei transformed into her panda and leaped off the building with Miriam on her back. She helped Miriam open her window and when she climbed in Mei poofed out of her panda and walked to the front of the building.

"Marissa," Marissa turned her head and a smug look replaced her annoyed one.

"Meilin, what a surprise. I didn't know she meant you, figured it would be Abby or the other one," Marissa said, checking her nails before putting her hands on her hips.

"Priya. That's her name," Mei corrected through grit teeth.

"Yes, Prius." Mei was getting mad, she knew that Marissa knew Priya's name.

"Why are you here?" Mei shot back defensively. Marissa didn't flinch and crossed her arms.

"Waiting for Miriam to answer the damn door," Marissa said while glaring at the front door. She's announced herself plenty of times but there was never a response which got her angry. Miriam always answered the door for her.

"Well, she's not answering the damn door,"

"Listen Meilin, Miriam is mine. Ok? She isn't into you and she never will be, she is my love and only mine. Got that?" Mei was shocked at what she said. Her emotions were swirling around her, did Miriam tell her that or was she just spitballing? She stood there in pure shock and only when Marissa snapped her fingers is when her expression changed.

"Got it!" Marissa shouted and Mei nodded. Marissa leaned back with a smirk and swung her hair behind her shoulder.

"Good, now bye bye Meilin," Mei was furious and she wasn't about to transform into a red panda and annihilate Marissa in public, no she was waiting for privacy to do that. Instead, she stormed off into Miriam's backyard, unknowingly raising suspicion in Marissa.

"Psst, Mei! A little help?" Miriam said, swinging her legs out of her window. Mei opened her arms up and transformed into the red panda. Miriam jumped out of her window and landed on Mei's panda. The two landed on the ground with a thud and the close contact caused Mei to poof back. Miriam had grabbed her skateboard and two helmets, one for her and the other for Mei. And when Mei was in her human form she realized where Miriam's head was.

Miriam quickly shot up and stumbled back a bit until she gained control over her legs. Her face was burning red as she dropped her skateboard to offer Mei help. Mei, whose face was also burning red, accepted Miriam's hand. Miriam pulled Mei up and the two stood in silence, both unsure what to say. Mei decided it was safer to stay quiet so she poofed into her panda and grabbed Miriam's skateboard. Miriam took the board and climbed on Mei's back before the two took off.

"Are you thinking about getting a summer job?" Miriam suddenly asked. Mei has been thinking about that recently but it was only because Miriam wasn't with her this summer so it would've been an effective way to spend it.

"Yeah, have you?"

"Absolutely! Marissa has been up my ass since the summer started. Never leaving me alone or giving me privacy," Miriam seemed to deflate in Mei's fur.

"She's always been like this but not this bad,"

"You seem to complain about her quite a lot," Mei commented, hoping to not get a negative reaction from her best friend/current love interest.

"I know! Sometimes I question... nevermind," Miriam quieted down and for the rest of the ride, they were silent. Mei didn't mind though, knowing there was a crack in Miriam and Marissa's relationship made her happy. The two arrived at the skate park and surprisingly it was empty. Mei poofed out of her panda and took the red helmet Miriam offered her. They both put on helmets and adjusted them to their liking before Miriam led Mei to a small ramp.

"Alright, so you'll want to have your feet positioned like this," Miriam stood on her board Mei eyed the position, memorizing it. When Miriam got off, Mei hopped on the board put her feet in that position.

"Hmm, turn your body a bit. Here," Miriam put her hands on Mei's hips and turned her slightly. Mei immediately got butterflies in her stomach from Miriam's hands, her soft, gentle hands.

"Got it?" Miriam asked, though she didn't move her hands and Mei noticed. Mei hummed and Miriam reluctantly removed her hands.

"Ok, now use your front foot to take off and stop. Make sure your back foot stays in the back," Mei followed Miriam's instructions and lightly pushed herself forward. Mei was slightly scared she would fall but the thought disappeared when Miriam started cheering behind her. With newfound confidence, Mei was able to turn around and ride towards Miriam. Not a professional, Mei ended up tripping off the board and landing in Miriam's arm, her eyes wide from fear.

"I've got you, girl," Miriam whispered as Mei whimpered in her arms. Mei thought she was about to go flying off that board and going home with a bruise was not on her to-do list.

"Hey, you did great," Miriam said, eyeing her skateboard as it came to a stop in the middle of the ramp.

"I'm proud of you," Mei pulled her head out of Miriam's chest and looked up into her green eyes. The urge to lean up and kiss Miriam was strong, and she was surprised that her panda didn't come out. The thumping in her chest was loud and the butterflies were swimming in her stomach. She was so close.

"Hey, Mir?"

"Hmm?"

"Can I kiss you?" Mei took a big risk with that question but she was proud of herself when she was able to ask. She didn't want to ask now considering Miriam wasn't the happiest with Marissa but the urge was strong.

"Yeah,"

"Really?" Miriam nodded. Mei stood on her tippy toes and leaned in for a kiss. The twos lips connected and sparks went off in Mei's stomach. This was exactly what she was wanted since 8th grade. When the two pulled away, they both giggled.

"That felt better,"

"I wanted this since 8th grade Mir, I wanted to tell you as a freshman but chickened out, I was going to tell you as a sophomore but it was too late. I love you Mir, so so much even though you're already in a relationship," Mei confessed. She was surprised she didn't stutter or trip over her words, she's been holding that in for a while and it freed up space in her chest.

"I..." Miriam paused and the reality hit her. Mei loved her and she loved Mei, that's what she felt all those years. A yearning for Mei. But the reality of already being in a relationship hit her as well.

"Mei I... I'm not happy with Marissa. She makes me feel awful and guilty about everything I do, and she hardly gives me space. She's controlling over my decisions and she was the reason I stopped being with you guys. I've missed you all so much but the look of hurt on her face kills me. I love you too, but I just don't know what to do with Marissa," Miriam admitted, tears pooling in her eyes. Mei reached up wiped Miriam's tears away, then caressed her cheek again.

"Well, maybe you can-"

"MIRIAM MENDELSOHN!!" Both girls stumbled away from each other and turned in the direction of the voice.

Marissa's voice.

Mei saw the fear on Miriam's face and transformed into the panda. Her helmet fell off of her as she stood in front of Miriam, blocking Marissa's view.

"Marissa Romano," Mei said calmly, though she wanted to rip Marissa apart when she heard Miriam crying behind her. Marissa's face was red and she looked as if she was about to explode.

"Want to repeat that to my face, Miriam!?" She shouted, storming over to the to. When she got into arms reach Mei grabbed her and pushed her back.

"Don't touch her!"

"Or what? What are you going to do? Hurt me like you did to Tyler in 8th grade?!" Marissa yelled matter-of-factly. Mei tensed, how did she know about that, was it everywhere? Marissa sensed Mei's uncertainty and grinned smugly.

"I was there, I saw everything you freak!"

"Don't call her that!" Miriam said from behind Mei. Marissa scoffed and glared at Mei.

"Step out of the panda and let me speak to Miriam. She's my girlfriend!" Mei looked behind her and saw Miriam shaking her head. She wasn't crying anymore which made Mei smile but she still looked slightly afraid.

"Is this what you meant?" Mei whispered and Miriam nodded. Mei turned around and poofed out of the panda. She stormed up to Marissa and glared up at her.

"Miriam doesn't want to talk to you so go away!" Marissa's eyes widened and she looked past Mei, towards Miriam. Marissa's brows furrowed and out of nowhere slapped Mei.

"Mei!" Miriam scrambled off of the ground and ran over to Mei. She pulled Mei behind her and eyed Marissa angrily which caught Marissa off guard. Miriam never glared at her.

"Don't hit Mei! What the hell is wrong with you dude?!"

"Mir, listen-"

"Don't call me Mir. Only Mei and my friends can do that," Miriam snapped as Mei hugged Miriam while sniffling.

"And I don't want to hear any other pet names you used to call me." Marissa sighed and tried to hold Miriam's hand but she pulled it away.

"You crossed the line, Marissa, hurting people to get what you want is wrong. A-And we're done, I don't love you anymore,"

"Fine. I got everything I needed from you anyway!" Marissa snapped before storming off into the distance. Once she was out of view, Miriam hugged Mei back.

"Are you ok? I'm sorry Mei I should've been here earlier I was scared,"

"Yeah, still stings," Mei pulled away and rubbed the side of her face. Miriam smiled sadly, at least Mei was somewhat ok. Miriam then bent down and planted a kiss on Mei's cheek.

"Come on, we can skateboard another time." Miriam walked away from Mei and grabbed her helmet and her skateboard while Mei transformed into her panda. Miriam hopped on her back and the two headed to Mei's place. They walked in through the front door and went inside Mei's room. Thankfully, her mom wasn't there so Miriam had time to grab an ice pack from the freezer.

"Here," Mei put the ice pack to her cheek and sat on her bed, feeling glum for the first time today. All her urges were resolved but she just didn't feel happy with herself. Although Miriam admitted she wasn't happy in her relationship, she still ruined it and she knew Miriam well enough to know there was still an ounce of love for Marissa inside of her.

"Mei?" Mei looked up from the floor and stared into Miriam's concerned eyes.

"You've been kinda silent,"

"Yeah, I have, haven't I," Miriam looked away before sitting on the bed next to Mei.

"Are you happy? We get to hang out again," Miriam tried looking for the light in the current situation. And it was true, she was going to contact Abby and Priya tomorrow to see if they all can hang out like old times.

"I ruined everything between you two,"

"No, no Mei you didn't. You actually helped me, and defend me when I didn't want to confront you. You helped me realize how toxic she actually was, and you showed me how much of a better match you are compared to her," Miriam looked away from Mei and at her wall as she swung her legs.

"Mei, I love you. More than I did with Marissa and even though we just broke up I want to try being with you. Now that I'm thinking about it, the more time I spent away from you the more my feelings grew, Marissa just suppressed them." Miriam chuckled awkwardly before she turned back to Mei.

"Look, Mir, I don't feel right getting together with you," Saying Miriam was crushed was an understatement and luckily Mei wasn't finished.

"Not right now at least, I want you to have some time out of a relationship, and then we can get together. How does that sound?"

"Sure girl, sounds perfect," Mei smiled and jumped off her bed, going over to her desk and grabbing her CD player. She brought it over to the bed and hopped back on.

"Wanna listen to 4*town?"

"Duh!" Miriam and Mei giggled. Mei offered Miriam one headphone which she accepted and Mei put the other one on her. 

The two sat on the bed humming along to the tunes of 4*town for the evening, doused in each other's presence.

Yeah I felt them go out of character a bit in this one 😅def, not my best haha