I sat down on the bench next to Karma and didn't say a word. She was watching the families in the center of the grassy play area of the park. My eyes followed where she was looking. There was a mother showing her daughter how to fly a kite. Then there was the dad who was throwing the football with his son. There was also another mom who was getting onto her son about something he had clearly done wrong.

"How did you find me?" 

I wasn't going to get into the whole GPS tracking thing right now. I knew she was on thin ice enough as it is. When I glanced over at Karma, the way her lips were so tightly pressed together told me she was barely holding back a scream. It was as if it were just there in the back of her throat to come out.

I looked back at the parents and their kids. "Why don't you tell me why you snuck away?"

"I didn't sneak."

"Come on, little dancer," I chuckled.  "You sent Nate to get you aspirin, then vanished. I may not be a lawyer, but that seemed to be premeditated to me."

Her shoulders rose and fell when she took a deep breath. "I don't know how to do this," she finally whispered. "I'm so...ashamed."

I had a pretty good idea about what she was going to say, but I needed her to explain it to me. If she didn't talk about it out loud, she was never going to get past it.

"Ashamed of what?"

"Myself." She never took her eyes off of the mother and daughter flying a kite. "Do you know about what happened between Nathan and me?"

"Harper told me you guys dated in high school. She said there was a bad breakup and then you didn't see each other until you moved back here to New York. But she didn't give me specifics."

She leaned back against the bench. "Nathan took me to a hotel for our one year anniversary. It was actually one of the best nights of my life. At least...the beginning of it was. I had fallen asleep, and when I woke up, he was gone. He left behind the necklace I had bought him and a note that said two words: 'Remember me'."

Karma exhaled a shaky breath. "That devastated me. He just...left me. No reason why, no explanation, nothing. It wasn't until after he and I got back from Florida when my dad was in the hospital that I found out the truth."

"He finally told you?"

"No." She glanced towards me. "My mom did."

That answer surprised me. "How did she—"

"Because she was the one who made him do it. She knew I was going to give up my scholarship to USF and go to college here because I didn't want to leave Nathan." The bitterness in Karma's voice was clear. "So she took it upon herself to force him to hurt me. To force me to go to USF. I was so mad at her when I found out."

"You had every right to be."

"I know," she said, before turning her head towards me. I was expecting for her eyes to be red and watery, but they weren't. "But I'm still so angry with her. What kind of person does that make me, Jackson? She's dead and I'm still mad at her."

She looked back to the people in the park and I sat next to her quietly. Unfortunately, I was too familiar with what she was dealing with.

"I was furious with my mom when she died," I blurted. That seemed to get her attention. I'd never really talked about my mother passing with anyone. Not even Harper.

"Really?"

I nodded. "She had known she was sick for a long time before she told me. She said she was trying to protect me. But that was bullshit. She was scared to face the truth."

I shifted on the bench, stretching out my legs and crossing them at the ankles. "I flew to the States for Ryan and Harper's wedding because she begged me to. She knew she was getting sicker, and she lied to me about it. When I found out she was getting worse, I flew out there immediately. Harper and Ryan came with me. Of course, she and I were still a secret back then."

I focused my gaze on a plane passing overhead. If I was going to get this out, I couldn't look at Karma when I said it.

"Can I tell you something and have you promise me that it doesn't get back to Harper?" She nodded. "After Harper went back to the States, I wasn't...planning on coming back."

I knew I had her attention now. "You weren't going to come back to Harper?"

I ran my hand over my face and exhaled a deep breath. "Before Harper, I never had a girlfriend. I never dated and I didn't believe in love. I saw how hurt and heartbroken my mother was when it didn't work out between her and my dad. I didn't want to go through that, so I never let myself get close to anyone."

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "When my mom died, it terrified me even more. It scared me because, on some level, I realized that Harper had gotten under my skin. I didn't realize that I was in love with her yet, but I knew that if I went back to the States, things with her were going to progress. So...I decided not to go back."

"But you did come back," she stated matter-of-factly. "What changed your mind?"

"I missed her."

"Your mom?"

I shook my head. "It was Harper. I mean, yes, I missed my mother too, but it wasn't until a few months after that that I stopped being angry at her."

I turned towards Karma. "The day after I decided to stay in London, I realized something. That's what made me come back to the States—to Harper. And you need to realize it, too."

"Realize what?"

"If you want to be angry at your mum, Karma, then be angry. You have every right and there is nothing to be ashamed of. But she's gone. Just like my mum...she's gone. There's nothing we can do about that. We can mourn them, we can love them, and we can miss them—but they're gone," I whispered.

She closed her eyes tight and I reached out to wipe away a tear. It seemed almost impossible to keep my own emotions in check, but somehow I managed to do it.

"Harper, Ryan, your dad...Nate. They're still here with us." After a brief pause, I said, "Nate loves you, Karma, and he's been worried sick about you."

She buried her face in her hands as she broke down. "I know. I know he's been worried about me. I didn't know how to tell him. He wouldn't understand. It was different for him when he lost his parents."

I rubbed my hand against her back to offer comfort. I had wondered why she wasn't confiding in me, and now I knew. Lanie had told me how devastated she and Nate were when their parents had died. It was different for people like Karma and myself. She was worried that he wouldn't understand, or maybe that he would judge her, if he knew that she was angry at her mother.

"Look at me, Karma." She did. "Nate will understand. All he wants is for you to be safe and healthy. He just wants you."

A few minutes passed before Karma exhaled a shuddering breath. "Jackson?"

"Yes, little dancer?"

"Will you take me home now?"

I stood up and extended my hand to her, "Let's go."

As soon as we got in the car, I texted Nate to let him know that I was bringing her home. He asked if there had been any progress, and I had finally responded yes. I could almost picture him falling onto his couch with relief.

I glanced over at Karma as she continued to eat the food I picked up for her. When I asked her if she needed anything before I took her home, I was pleasantly surprised when she asked me to go through drive-thru.

For a moment, I thought of Harper. I honestly didn't think I would have gotten through my mother's death without her. I don't even know if I ever told her that. I still remember the day she offered to come with me to London clear as a bell. I was going to tell her no at first. I was going to tell her that this was something I needed to do on my own. But when she asked me if I wanted her to come with me or to stay in the U.S., I pleaded for her to come.

I wouldn't change anything that I had experienced with Harper. Even if...even if she never wanted to be with me again, I wouldn't regret any of it. Sure, it would hurt like hell and I would be surprised if I could ever date anyone again, but—

"Are you and Harper over?"

My head whipped in her direction. "How..."

She offered me a sad smile. "When she was paying her respects to my mom, you weren't standing beside her. I know you well enough to know that you wouldn't have let her go through that alone."

My hand gripped the steering wheel and I kept my eyes on the road. "She said he needed a break to think about things. She said it didn't mean that we were over for good, that she just needed some time."

"You two will work this out, Jackson."

I gave a short laugh. "How can you be so sure?"

"Because I've seen the way you love each other. Nothing will change that. You two are forever."

"I hope you're right," I whispered. Because the alternative was something I couldn't think about.

When I turned on Karma's street, she straightened in her seat. "Hey, Jackson?"

"Hm?"

"If I need to, you know, be reminded about..."

I pulled into the driveway and saw Nate waiting outside by the front door. "My phone is always on and my door is always open."

"Thanks."

She got out of the car and ran into Nate's arm. Since her window was down I could hear her tearful words.

"I'm so sorry, Nathan."

He wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her hair. "I love you so much, baby. You have nothing to apologize for."

Nate looked at me and mouthed a thank you. I nodded to him and watched as they disappeared into the house. After I backed out of their driveway, I started heading to my hotel.

I pulled out my cell phone to call Harper and let her know that Karma was home safe. I knew it would probably be better for my own mental health right now if I didn't hear her voice, but I decided to call Harper instead of texting her.

"Jackson? Did you find her?"

If felt like someone had my heart in their fist. And they squeezed. "Yeah. She's back home. Safe and sound."

Harper's relieved sigh echoed through the receiver. "Thank you, Jackson. Really."

"Of course." There was a brief—and awkward—silence before ai cleared my throat. "Princess?"

"Yes?"

"I never said thank you."

"For what?"

I gripped the steering wheel. "For...coming to London. I wouldn't—Fuck. I never would have been able to make it through that without you. So, thank you."

Her voice shook a little. Like she was holding back tears. "You're welcome, Jackson."

We talked for about five minutes before we got off of the phone. I was planning on driving straight to my hotel, but I found myself ending up at the corner store down the street. I've tried to cut down on my drinking, but tonight...

Tonight was going to be fucking long.