The fresh air, dazzling sunshine and picturesque lawn on campus that brought Emily so much joy last Friday seemed to mock her this Friday. She walked against the surge of bodies that headed toward the cafeteria. The other students happily chattered. But Emily kept her head down and ignored anyone that spoke to her as she pressed on towards the main building.

When I was younger and my family was falling apart the school day followed a comforting schedule... It was easier to ignore the chaos at home and pretend everything was fine when I was in school... While it was tiresome, it was also a refuge... But today, school is definitely not my sanctuary...

Emily descended the steps to the dark, desolate location of her locker in the basement locker room. In September she had bemoaned her misfortune at having been assigned her sophomore locker there, instead of one in the much preferred area beside the bright and airy student lounge upstairs.

But always needing to pretend that everything is "normal"... Always trying to be perfect all the time... It often makes being around people feel like a chore...

So quickly Emily had grown to appreciate her out-of-the-way locker spot and the quiet escape it offered whenever she needed a break. Today she was especially thankful for it and knew nobody else would be by the dismal lockers so it was the ideal spot to hide during lunch.

The fact that I have to make it through two more classes and then commute home makes me want to curl up in a ball...

And whenever anyone asked if she was okay today, she found it increasingly hard not to lash out and yell, "No, I'm not okay! I woke up in a world where my best friend betrayed me, school sucks, I actually want to go to my Dad's! Everything in my life is topsy-turvy and a terrifying mess! I'm glad to be sitting on the dusty floor alone in this miserable locker room!" 

She laughed bitterly at how it reminded her of the books she loved as a very little girl, such as "Freaky Friday," "Wizard of Oz" or "Alice in Wonderland." She slumped against her locker.

Back then, it was fun to read about somebody waking up to a completely different life one day... But it is exhausting to live in an alternate reality...

"I'm so stupid," she said aloud to no one.