Roman smiled, enjoying the sound of ripped paper, and Zara's giddiness while tearing the gifts open. Her presence calmed the storm that raged in his heart for a year. It was like wrapping in a fleece blanket on a wintry night. So glad that you're here. Roman stood shaking his head as he put the groceries away. He'd never thought she'd come back. This was a Christmas miracle.

"Are you going to model for me?" he said, with a wicked grin. He knew the answer would be no because she was self-conscious of her weight and drawing attention. He was just messing with her, knowing that she was also a good sport.

A pillow sailed across the kitchen, bopping him in the head. He laughed at the answer. "Then that would be no?"

"You know that it is no," she said, holding up a purple sweater and a pair of straight-leg jeans. "But, I love it all."

"I knew that you would."

Having put the last items in the pantry, he stepped from behind the kitchen island. Roman walked to the other pile of gifts that he had separated and pulled out an unwrapped box. He sat on the floor next to Zara and slid the box across. "But do oblige me with this," he grinned, watching her eyes sparkle.

"I'm going to owe you big time for all these gifts."

The only thing that you owe me is the rest of your life. I intend to collect it.

"What does that look mean?" she said, watching his eyebrows arch. Roman shrugged. Zara opened the box and laughed. A set of his and hers matching candy-striped pajama's laid flat in the box. She pulled them out, tossing Roman's pair to him. "You're so funny, but this is perfect."

"Indeed for the peppermint bark cook-off that is about to commence."

She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you, Roman. This was great."

Roman stood up and began clearing the shredded papers and empty boxes. Zara started to help but he asked her not too. "You've had a long flight. Why don't you take a shower and then come back all Christmas-y."

"Sounds like a good idea. You know how I like to take long showers, but I'll leave you enough hot water, okay?"

"Good." Roman couldn't take his eyes off Zara as she disappeared down the hall. It was a refreshing sight that lifted his heart, unlike the last memory that he had of her there. He flinched at the pain of the confrontation. The memory was deep as a stab wound and he knew that she must have felt it too...

***

"I can't do this, Roman. I can't love you the way that you want. You're like my brother and you should know that by now."

"You're lying through your damn teeth, Zara."

She hurled a ring of keys that sailed in the air then sliced across his cheek, drawing blood. Roman smarted, grabbing the side of his face with a growl, as the keyring slammed into the wall.

"I've come here for the last five years to help you with your grief. But I can't give you more of myself."

Roman hated that his anger had flared that day. He'd had all that he could take, and before he realized it he had cornered Zara, forcing her back against the wall. He leaned down inches from her face, breathing hard as anger fueled him.

"It's not can't, Zara," he snapped. "It's won't. It's always won't."

Roman grabbed her by the shirt, slamming Zara against his chest. He lowered his mouth. "I'm about to kiss you. You only need to tell me to stop." He gave her a moment, boring into her eyes. His lips hovered over hers, until they dropped down consuming hers.  The passionate assault left her moaning.  The kiss was open-mouth, hot and demanding. His ferocity went deeper. The love that he felt released between them at that moment burned his skin even now.

Every thing felt so perfect in that moment until Zara crushed her palms into his chest and shoved him.  Roman stumbled into the wall.

Zara ran her fingers through her hair.  "I can't do this."

There has got to be a way to get through to her.

Roman slammed his fist into the wall as he watched her march down the hall to her room.  The screech of drawers pulled open and luggage being unzipped was the last thing that he wanted to hear.  He followed cringing at the fact that she was about to run again.

From the time that he was seven-years-old, there was an awareness of her trauma. He heard the arguments between her parents, saw them fight, and saw her mother bark in her face ripping her self esteem to shreds – you're a fat pig, big and sloppy as your father.

Mr. Peters was a big guy – she'd gotten it by genetics. But that didn't affect her mother's vicious attacks - it amplified them. Mrs. Peters hated how much Zara looked like her father. She took the hatred that she'd had of Zara's father out on her daughter. It was cruel.

As a child, he didn't understand the complexity of it. Roman just knew that he could make Zara smile and make her happy. He was always there for Zara. At some point his care turned into pure-unconditional love. Zara was the only woman that Roman ever wanted.

"Don't go."

"I'm uncomfortable here. I have to go," she whispered. "We need to grow up and move on with life. Please don't ask me to come back."

"You're uncomfortable here – really? All that I have ever done in this place or anywhere else was to love you. Have you ever considered what your rejection has done to me?"

"Don't do this to me, Roe."

Wheels on her suitcase clattered down the wooden floor. She passed without even giving a back glance.  With shoulders held back and head high she marched to the door.  Rushed air slipped through the door as she opened it.  "Goodbye. I've helped you all that I can. It's best that we end things here because it's too painful. Please don't call me."

"I've loved you all my life, Zara and I swear that I will outrun you."

Slammed door...

***

Roman shook his head wanting that dreadful memory to fade. It was overwhelming. He walked to the 14-foot panels of glass that covered the walls of his living room, looking out on a snowy world and ushered up a prayer. "Dear God, snow us in, that's the only way that she won't run. I need her."

"Hey, Roe – I'm modeling."

He turned to see Zara with a ridiculous smile on her face; she twirled and tossed her arms out into a silly pose. Roman laughed until he couldn't breathe. Because not only did she have on the peppermint pajamas she found the reindeer hat and the Rudolph nose stuffing that on her head and nose.

"Let me go shower. I will never be outdone by that modeling act."

In a few strides, he stood in front of Zara pinching the red nose. It squeaked. Both of them laughed because neither knew that the nose could squeak. It wasn't long before the next model strode into the room.

"Hey, Zara."

Showered and wearing the cologne that Zara loved, Roman strutted as if on a catwalk. The rich timbre of his voice pulled Zara away from the kitchen preparing peppermint bark. Roman grinned at her bulged eyes, and bitten lip. He intended to turn up the heat while she was there. You're not getting away this time.

He kept his laugh on the inside, watching her big brown-eyes glued to his low hanging peppermint pants. Up the black hairs on his exposed-muscled chest, and all the way to the Santa hat dangling on his head. She gasped, and that sounded so good to him.

Zara wheezed. He couldn't hold his laughter any longer. "Like what you see, treasure?" he teased.

Yes. She smirked but didn't say a word.

Roman walked into the kitchen, standing behind her. He placed his hand on hers as she stirred the chocolate in the pot. There was that beautiful gasp again - she faltered against his chest. He slipped his other hand around her waist and pulled Zara tighter against him, kissing the top of her hair.

"Oh, God." Slipped from her lips.

Roman knew those whispered words were not something that she wanted him to hear. He didn't tease her about it. Roman kept his hand on hers while stirring the pot - feeling the heat burning between them. Zara's nearness set him on fire – it scorched her.

He leaned down kissing the side of her face, dragging his lips to her ear. The sound of Zara's heavy breathing was precious. "I want you. That might make you uncomfortable. But there is an easy solution to get rid of all that discomfort."

Roman eased his hand down and cut the pot off. He turned Zara to face him. She lowered her head; lips trembling and he lifted it back up. "I know that you love me. I know that all your life you've had this negative voice in your head." Roman leaned down, kissing her forehead. "But I promise, if you would just let me love you until you can love yourself – all the discomfort will go away. I want you to try, okay?"

Zara sighed against his chest, nodding her head. "How have you put up with me for so long?"

"Because I love you."