“So, guys, as we are all trapped in here, I suggest that we might find something to do together.”

Jonesy was smiling, waiting for reactions coming from the other musicians, who were all sitting on the couches of the living room, aside from David, sticking his nose to the wall. Charlie was sitting still, crossing his legs, next to Keith who was sitting upside down. John and Bonzo shared a couch; John was smiling at Jonesy, his new friend, whilst Bonzo was half asleep. Jonesy sighed and pointed at his bandmate.

“Bonzo, please, help me! You're supposed to be the boss here!”

“I don't want to get involved in it. I like you, Jonesy, you know that, but I've got a feeling that it's going to turn into a sort of chess players meeting.”

Jonesy rolled his eyes and jumped as he caught a glimpse of David running up to him.

“How about gossiping? About our bandmates, mmh?”

“But, David, you're a fucking boring solo singer!” Keith complained. “Though I'd love to gossip about Pete's nose.”

“Well” David cleared his throat, “who's for the idea of gossiping?”

Much to Jonesy's surprise, everybody raised a hand. Keith was the first to raise his, followed by a bored Bonzo, an excited David and two embarrassed John and Charlie. Jonesy sighed and shrugged.

“It's democracy.”

He sat on the free armchair and joined his hands over his stomach. David sat down on the table in the middle of the circle, crossing his legs elegantly and looking at everybody with stars in his eyes.

“So? Who wants to start?”

As nobody answered, he sighed and immediately pointed at Keith.

“We'll gossip in that order: Keith, Charlie, John, Bonzo, myself, and Jonesy. Each of you will give us a crispy story about a bandmate or another famous-but-fabulous friend! It's your turn, Keith.”

“Oh, well...”

Keith threw his legs on his right, sitting properly on the couch, his hair completely messed up. He frowned and looked up to the ceiling, twisting his hands.

“One week ago, Roger was late for a day of sessions in the studio and he showed up wearing only his underwear. He noticed only when we started to laugh. I remember him say 'Oh my Lord, I knew I had forgotten something!'”

David clapped, laughing out loud. Charlie and John were chuckling, Bonzo was yawning, and Jonesy tried to hide his laughter. He cleared his throat and pointed at Charlie, who slightly smiled and sat up, looking at his feet.

“Here is a story of the fascinating and dangerous Rolling Stones. A few days ago, we were walking on stage, and as you all may know, Mick stuffs his underwear with socks...”

“WHAT?!” Keith yelled. “I didn't know that! He promised his crotch was real and all! And I gave him a tenner because I didn't believe him and he showed me! Fuck...”

They all bursted out laughing at the gullible Keith, who blushed and pouted.

“As I was saying,” Charlie continued, “he stuffs his underwear with socks and when we walked on this stage, the socks managed to sneak out of his boxers and fell through the leg of his velvet trousers.”

“And that's how a myth was broken!” David laughed.

“Indeed.”

The six musicians giggled and it was John's turn to tell a crispy story about his bandmates. The bass player cleared his throat and sat up, nervously twisting his hands, trying to find something to say. His face lit up with a smile when he found one; he knew the others would love it. He coughed and took a deep breath.

“During our latest tour with Queen, we were a bit drunk before a gig, all of us but Brian. And he... He locked himself into his dressing room. Well at least he thought he did. I needed a new set of bass strings, which I left in his dressing room. I knocked, but he didn't reply, so I came in, picked up the set of strings and I wanted to tell him I had them, so he wouldn't worry. The bathroom door was open and he was combing his big, fluffy, curly hair into... braids.”

Bonzo's eyes widened before he bursted out laughing, along with the others. But he was laughing so hard that he fell from the couch, kicking the table on which David was sitting, which slipped on the wooden floor to hit Keith's knees afterwards. The latter screamed in pain and abruptly stood up, ready to punch the other drummer right in the face. Jonesy and Charlie immediately caught him by the arms and forced him to sit down.

“KEITH! COOL OUT!” Charlie yelled, making everybody jump, all the pairs of eyes widened.

“Yes, sir” Keith grumbled. “Sorry Bonzo and John.”

“What did you do to me?” John said, raising an eyebrow.

“I spoiled your story, which was quite hilarious by the way. I can't imagine Sheep Hair with those braids!”

“Hey, don't call him Sheep Hair! He's my bandmate and one of my best friends!”

“John's right, Moon. Show some respect” Jonesy said quietly.

“Anyway, it's Bonzo's turn, now” Keith smiled, ignoring Charlie. “I bet he's going to talk about the size of Golden Sheep's lemons!”

“Keith, will you stop giving people names with 'sheep' in it?” John sighed, rolling his eyes.

“Hey, it's not my fault if almost every star out there has wavy or curly hair! Mine is straight, what could I say?”

“Shut up, now, Pancake Head” Bonzo said, a bit annoyed.

“HEY DON'T CALL ME THAT!”

Once again, Jonesy and Charlie prevented him to punch Bonzo. Bonzo sat back on the couch, clearing his throat and sighing. A bit bored, he tried to find something interesting about his band. As he found none, he told them so.

“Nah, can't find a good story. Your turn, Alien.”

“No way! You have to say one story!” David said, raising a finger in the air, ignoring the nickname.

Bonzo sighed, looking straight into Jonesy's eyes, which were silently encouraging him, accompanied with a smile. Bonzo smiled internally; Jonesy was always here for him, encouraging him for everything he wanted to do, comforting him when he was far from his family or simply sad. Was it because they were both put in the dark side of Jimmy and Robert's light? Maybe. But Bonzo would always be thankful to him for that. As if he could read his mind, Jonesy smiled heartily. Bonzo took a deep breath and finally told a story.

“Jonesy wears thongs for gigs.”

Suddenly, the smile on the bass player's face faded away. Everybody gasped before bursting out laughing. Bonzo shrugged with a smirk. Jonesy stood up abruptly, making everybody jump, and pointed at his bandmate.

“YOU FUCKING TWAT! IT'S NOT TRUE!”

“Jonesy, Jonesy, I'm behind you all on stage, I can see those things.”

David was convulsing with laughter, almost rolling on the table. Charlie tried not to laugh, as he liked Jonesy a lot and felt sorry for him.Unfortunately, the situation was too hilarious to be hidden. As for Keith, he had sat upside down again, the back of the couch against the back of his thighs. His hands were upon his stomach, as it hurt like mad. John was worriedly looking at his friend, whose jaw was slightly shaking with anger.

“Sit down, Jonesy, otherwise the string of your thong will itch you afterwards.”

Bonzo's last remark was too much. Jonesy passed by the table and punched his bandmate right in the face, stopping everyone's laughter. Bonzo was completely confused, looking at his friend with widened eyes, rubbing his nose.

“YOU WERE NOT SUPPOSED TO KNOW!”

Then, Jonesy angrily walked out of the room, going upstairs. They all shared confused looks, sorry they had hurt him. John stood up and patted Bonzo's shoulder.

“I'm taking care of him.”

He ran up the stairs to comfort Jonesy. Meanwhile, David had cleared his throat and was about to tell a story. After all, they could still have fun, they would apologise later, wouldn't they? With a curious expression on their faces, Keith, Charlie and Bonzo looked at the alien.

“One day, I was in London for shopping, and I saw Jonesy buying one of those thongs Bonzo was talking about!”

Keith and Charlie giggled, whilst Bonzo's eyes widened.

“Wait, I was kidding, I had no idea he was wearing thongs!”

“Did you hear him say 'you were not supposed to know' a few minutes ago?” Charlie sighed. “Because he did!”

“Oh fuck, I owe him apologies.”

They all nodded, and it was Keith's turn to tell a story. Still sitting upside down, he smiled widely and started to swing his legs.

“I remember that after the filming of the Rock and Roll Circus, we all went to a bar, and we spent the whole evening drinking! Well of course that was the day after, because after the filming, we were exhausted. But there was someone – I think it was Pete – who got so drunk that he threw up on every wall of the bar and spread the vomit on the wallpaper with his t-shirt, saying it was a masterpiece! That was disgusting, but oh god, Pete was hilarious! D'you remember, Charlie?”

“That was not Pete, that was you.”

Keith's smile faded away and Bonzo sniggered, hiding his face with his hand. David was disgusted by the elements of the story but giggled at Charlie's remark. Keith sighed and shrugged.

“That means I'm hilarious, I don't care. Your turn, Chess Player.”

“Ah, shut up, Moon! Well... what can I say, really? This band is full of shitty stories!”

At this moment, John walked back in the room, and the four musicians looked at him.

“He's alright. I managed to calm him down. He won't come down for now, he's reading a book. You should talk to him later, Bonzo, he's quite mad at you.”

“I will. You're just in time for a story by our one and only Charles Watts!”

Charlie giggled as John sat beside Bonzo. With a grin, he looked at his friend, waiting to hear a story.

“Actually, I can't pick one!”

“C'mon Charlie!” Keith complained. “I'm getting bored!”

The drummer of the Rolling Stones sighed and looked at the wall in front of him, trying to find something to say. He shrugged.

“Well, one day we invited the Beatles to our studio, and Mick couldn't stop licking John's boots. And Paul was a bit pissed off, as if he was jealous that Mick was with him. Keith didn't care, and Brian, I think he was too high to think properly. So Paul and Brian pulled a prank on both of them, and they did the traditional prank: they put a bucket filled with water on the top of a half-opened door. They sneaked behind it and called Mick and John, claiming that Keith passed out. They didn't even notice that Keith was next to them and they both ran to the door and widely opened it. But the bucket didn't fell on them: it fell on Brian's head. Finally, Brian passed out. And Paul was laughing, though he was worried about him.”

David giggled, along with John and Keith. Bonzo crossed his arms against his chest and grumbled.

“Goddamn Paul McFartney.”

“Oh no, Bonzo, no, not that pun, no!”

They all laughed and then, it was John's turn.

“Last month, for Roger's birthday, Freddie had an idea for a joke. We wrapped toilet paper all around his favourite car, and when he saw it, I swear he was going crazy! He spend minutes and minutes trying to get rid of all this paper, and he tried to make me eat it.”

“Why you?”

“Oh, because Freddie and Brian were too busy hiding in a wardrobe.”

Charlie giggled and David pointed at Bonzo. Keith sighed.

“Nah actually I'm getting bored. I don't want to hear those stories anymore!”

“For once, I agree with you, Keith” Charlie sighed. “I'm tired.”

“At least let's hear the two last stories!”

They nodded and waited for Bonzo to speak. With a smirk, he looked at them all.

“Secretly, Jimmy wants to squeeze Robert's lemons, if you know what I mean.”

Nobody laughed. They were all looking at him with an expression of disgust on their faces. John broke the silence.

“This is getting really weird.”

“Let's prepare dinner, okay? I don't want to know more!” Keith said, sitting properly on the couch, but ready to stand up.

“Guys, guys, guys!” David shouted. “It's my turn now! It's the last one.”

They shared worried look and finally sighed.

“Okay.”

“One day, whilst Mick and I were doing the thing, he called me Charlie instead of David! Isn't it funny?”

Their eyes widened.

“Okay, this is getting even more weird” Keith whispered before standing up and bypassing the couch, going straight to his room.

Charlie stood up and immediately went upstairs, without saying a word. John and Bonzo stood up too, John going to the kitchen, and Bonzo locking himself in the bathroom. David remained there, in the middle of the room, still sitting on the table with his legs crossed.

“Guys! GUYS!” he shouted before sighing as nobody replied. “Ah, I didn't even tell you the best part, when he called me Moonie afterwards!”