A/N - Good evening Lovelies!  Another update for you!  I have big things planned for the rest of this story - so thank you for staying with me 😊.  Please vote and comment to let me know if you like or love it!  Thank you all!

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Nira rushed through the MedBay doors several steps ahead of the Supreme Leader and called for a gurney.  Everyone sprang into action and before Kylo even stepped through the doors two nurses and two doctors were waiting for him to set Rey down.  She was completely unconscious now.  They wheeled her through the doors, and he followed, still anxious for her – his heart seemingly pounding so hard he thought it would burst through his chest.  Although the tourniquet slowed the bleeding, the flow of blood from her arm was still alarming.  He also knew that if applied improperly or too long, a tourniquet could cause the loss of the limb.

The doctors rushed around her, hooking her up to their diagnostics and otherwise assessing the situation.  Clearly in the way, Kylo wasn't sure where to step or stand, until he felt the nurse's hand at his arm.  "Sir, let them do their work.  Why don't you come out of the room with me?"

Although he had tried to maintain the impassive look on his face since they had gotten her to MedBay, the nurse must have seen the worry in his eyes.   "Don't worry – she'll be fine.  You were a lot worse off when she brought you in here not that long ago, and look at you now."  She spoke softly, reassuringly, and smiled.  "Please.  They'll work faster without you in the way."

Looking back at Rey one last time, he turned to the nurse and nodded.  Taking one step forward, he stopped and turned around – striding back over to Rey and looking at the doctors briefly before leaning over to stroke her forehead and plant a kiss there.   "I'll be right outside Sweetheart.  Call if you need me."  He knew she couldn't really hear him, but hoped that somewhere in her mind his words would register.

The nurse was waiting for him outside of the procedure room, and gestured for him to take a seat.  "My name is Nira, Sir, in case you don't recall."

He looked up at her and swallowed the knot in his throat before responding quietly.   "Thank you Nira."  He hesitated before asking.  "Did you...see it?  The confrontation?"

She nodded.  "Most of it.   It all happened very quickly.  Maybe 5 minutes from start to finish?  Maybe not even that."  Pausing to think for a minute she continued.  "When I got there, everyone had already backed away.  Your Knight had already stopped Lady Rey, and they appeared to be talking.  Then Lt.Tiga stepped between them, and that's when all hell broke loose."  She took a deep breath and went on.   "The next thing I could see, Lt.Tiga went flying across the hall, hitting the wall, and Lady Rey ran over to make sure he was okay, but he appeared to be unconscious.   That's when the Knight pulled out her laser sword, and Lady Rey turned around and did the same."

She looked over at him, as she spoke again.  "At that point it clearly turned into a game of Cat and Mouse.  The Knight kept circling Lady Rey, while striking at her here and there – seeming to play with her.  Lady Rey just kept blocking them all, or jumping just out of reach."

Kylo's mouth thinned into a tight line.  "Did Rey strike her back?"

"Not at first.  The two were saying things to each other, and the Knight was getting angrier and angrier.  You could see it in how she was moving.  She became....wilder, somehow?   After a few minutes you could see the Knight go a little crazy – then suddenly she seemed to get a burst of energy and her swings became more focused.  It was then that Lady Rey started to strike her back."  She looked down, then back up at him.  "Lady Rey was actually quite amazing to watch.   I can't explain it – she had this calm, collected, poise about her as she swung her laser sword at the Knight.  I have no doubt that eventually she would have struck her."

Kylo couldn't help but feel a sense of pride wash through him at the nurse's words.

Shaking her head she sighed.  "But then, something happened and she stumbled or rolled her ankle or something, and the Knight struck her arm."  Pausing again, she took another deep breath.  "I...I think you saw the rest...".

He nodded, and leaned his elbows onto his knees, dropping his head in his hands.  Scrubbing his hand over his face, he looked back up a Nira.  "The ankle is my fault."  Looking back down at the ground, he admitted.  "We were training this morning, and I took her feet out from under her a bit too forcefully, giving her a nasty bruise on her ankle."  He dropped his head into his hands again.  "That almost ended up killing her."

Nira immediately tried to refute that.  "Sir – no!  I have treated many of your injuries after training, and some of them were pretty serious, so I know you're very aggressive when you train.   I have to assume that Lady Rey is too.  So you shouldn't blame yourself for her injury, if that was what indeed caused her to stumble."

Giving her a look that clearly said he didn't believe her, he scrubbed his hand over his face again and got up to pace in agitation.   He could feel the guilt starting to eat away at him, twisting his insides into knots, yet tearing him apart at the same time.  His emotions were roiling – his terror for her, and rage that it had happened at all - were threatening to boil over in front of everyone.   Looking down, he noticed that his hands were shaking.

Taking a deep breath, he clenched his fists and tried to calm himself.  But it wasn't working.  A sheen of sweat broke out on his forehead.  He needed to get a grip, or they'd see him fall apart.  Before that happened, he did the only thing he could. He closed his eyes and took another deep breath, and his demeanor changed into cold indifference as the impassive mask of Kylo Ren fell into place.

Nira had been watching the Supreme Leader pace – clearly having an argument with himself in his mind.  She could see that the reality of what had happened had finally set in, and it looked like he was about to break down.  Remembering how he had acted with Lady Rey while he was in the MedBay, her heart went out to him.  He was going through hell.  She was just about to get up to try to help him calm down when he suddenly stopped pacing, and went still as death. His shoulders straightened as he took a deep breath, and when he turned to face her, his face was completely devoid of emotion, or any expression at all.  She shivered as she remembered this person – it would seem that the old Kylo Ren had returned.

At that moment, one of the doctors came out and strode over.   "Supreme Leader, Sir, Lady Rey is stable right now.  But her artery was severed, and we have to go in and repair the damage.  She'll be in surgery for about an hour or so, and then likely sedated for another couple of hours.  We'll call you as soon as she's done, so its really not necessary for you to wait here."

Kylo's impassive mask was still on.  "I'm not going anywhere doctor. I 'll be right here when she's done."

The doctor gave him a small smile.  "Of course Sir.  We'll let you know as soon as she's out of surgery, and then you can see her."

Kylo nodded and went back to sit beside nurse Nira.  Turning to her he asked.  "Would you be able to check on Lt.Tiga's status?  I assume they brought him to the main MedBay."

"Of course Sir. I'll be back shortly."

He watched nurse Nira depart, and sat pondering everything that had happened that day, in silence.  It was times like this that he missed having his helmet.  Despite the veil of impassiveness he was wearing, his emotions still felt uncertain, threatening to spill over, uncontrolled, at any moment.  It was torture, and took everything in him not to let his overwhelming fear for her show on his face for all to see.  Taking a shuddering breath, he squeezed his hands together in an effort to continue maintain some semblance of his tightly wound control.

He had almost lost her!  Vitka could easily have killed her – and right under his nose, while she was in his direct protection!  How could he have failed so miserably?  He should have known something wasn't right with Vitka.  Recently, she appeared to have been questioning his decisions, and even his motives – and given her failure in obtaining Rey and her friends on Onderon, he should have known that she would have done something like this.

Rey had been comfortable here until now.  But after this she would likely want to return to her base at the first opportunity.  His throat was tight, imagining having to let her go.  How could he go back to not having her with him?  She was the joy in his day now – his very reason for everything he was doing.  She inspired him to be better, and to use his power and influence to make the galaxy a better place.  Growling in frustration, he raked his hands through his hair, before settling himself back into cold impassiveness.

He couldn't let anything like this happen again.   The rest of his Knights might also react similarly – and could cause problems with his plans – in all that he sought to accomplish.  Maybe he should call his Knights back now, and disband them immediately.   He'd need to think seriously about doing that, sooner rather than later.

How would Rey feel about all of this?  One of his Knights attacked her – tried to kill her – in what should have been a relatively safe place.  Instead, she had to fight her – obviously trying not to kill her – else she would have made more of an attempt to strike her rather than just fend off Vitka's blows.  And now she was in surgery, seriously injured, while he sat out here helplessly and worried himself sick.

A startling thought crossed his mind, and he stilled in shocked realization.   This is how she must have felt when he was hurt.  She was out here, waiting for him to come out of surgery, except that he was much more gravely injured that she was.  Swallowing again, he thought to himself.  She must have been out of her mind with fear.  They told him he was in surgery for 4 hours, and then he was unconscious for another 18 hours.  He could only imagine how excruciating that must have been for her.   And afterward, he had joked about being hard to kill.   Remorse twisted his gut, and made him feel sick.

To make things worse, he knew that Rey was a worrier.   If she had any awareness at all, she'd be worried about him – about his reactions – while he sat out here and worried about her.  He had to try to reach her, and let her know that he was all right, and not destroying the ship in one of his former tantrums.  Taking a deep breath to calm himself, he closed his eyes, focused on her, and tried to reach out through the bond.   "I'm still here Sweetheart, waiting to see your beautiful face when you wake up."

***

He was still sitting stoically in the same chair an hour and a half later when the doctor came out to see him again.  He had been sitting there, torturing himself, imagining the worst – all the things that could possibly go wrong.   Was the tourniquet too tight?   Would she have full use of her arm?  Did she lose too much blood?

Nurse Nira had already returned to let him know that Tiga had a severe concussion, and would likely be in the MedBay for a couple of days, but was otherwise okay.   Noting that she was off duty, he thanked her and sent her away, wanting to be alone.  She left reluctantly, letting him know that her shift started at midnight, but to call her if he needed her to return earlier.

He rose to meet the doctor as he approached, face still impassively expressionless as he waited for the report.   "Well, she's out of surgery Sir, and doing fine.  Everything went very well.   She had lost a lot of blood and we had to give her a couple of transfusions, but she should be back to her normal self in a couple of days.  There were no other complications – and everything else is fine as well."  Staring up at the Supreme Leader, the middle aged doctor noted the completely blank look on his face, as well as the tightly controlled posture; but he couldn't help notice the deep swallow as the man's adam's apple slowly bobbed up and down.  "Do you have any questions?"

Kylo was trying desperately not to collapse in utter relief that she was okay, and was keeping a tight rein on his emotions.  He was almost shaking with the effort, and was afraid that the smallest thing would cause the dam to burst and he'd lose control.  In response to the doctor's question, he tersely shook his head and tried to swallow the lump from his throat before speaking, his voice toneless.   "Can I see her?"

The doctor continued to study the Supreme Leader's apparent unfeelingly stern and stoic countenance, which was completely opposite to that from when he had first walked in with her, and then kissed her gently on the forehead.  He smiled compassionately.  "Of course Sir."  Placing his hand on Kylo's arm, he continued.  "If I may say Sir... I know its difficult and frightening to see someone you care about injured like that.  But she'll be fine Sir."

Kylo's eyes flicked to the doctor's, no longer able to keep the emotion from them, as his impassiveness slipped at the doctors compassionately spoken words.  His mouth opened and closed, and he swallowed yet again, as a shudder coursed through him.

His hand still on Kylo's arm, he could feel and see the Supreme Leader's shudder as it flowed through him.  "She really will be fine, Sir."

This time, Kylo couldn't keep the emotion from his voice, as he croaked out hoarsely.  "Thank you, doctor."

The doctor smiled.  "You're very welcome Sir.  Now, shall we go see her?"

***

Rey felt the heavy fog around her begin to clear away as she tried to open her eyes.  Everything around her seemed heavy, and her limbs felt weighted down.  Taking a deep breath, she forced her eyes open, and felt someone squeeze her right hand.  Turning her head, she could see Ben standing over her, her hand enveloped by both of his.  "How do you feel?"

"Thirsty."  She croaked out through parched lips.  He released her hand and few seconds later he brought a straw to her lips.

"Here.  Start slowly."  He admonished, his voice low and toneless.

After a few sips, she nodded and he took the cup away.  "What....happened?"  She asked.

Kylo looked away briefly before turning back to her.   "You had a run in with Vitka."  He said matter of factly.

Her eyes flared as the memories returned.  "Is she okay?"  She could feel his spark of anger through the bond.

"Rey – she tried to kill you.  Would have done so without a second thought – and would have been proud, even boastful about it – yet the first thing you ask is if she's okay?"

She could feel his anger – it was palpable – but knew that it was likely because he was worried for her.  Still, he seemed to be acting a bit harshly.  "I didn't want to kill her."  She hissed back at him.   "I specifically tried not to."

"I know – one of the nurses from MedBay saw the whole thing, and told me afterward."  He took a deep breath, trying to control his temper.  "Rey, why didn't you reach out to me – call out me?   I tried connecting to you, but got nothing."

"I....I...."  She looked at him sheepishly.   "Honestly, I didn't think of it.  And, I didn't mean to block you...I didn't even realize I was doing it."

He just gaped at her.  "Rey, when someone tries to kill you, and they do it playfully – gleefully – you don't just ward off the attack and hope you get lucky!  That's how you end up dead!"

Glowering at him, she responded.  "I know that!  I also knew that reinforcements would be coming and just had to stall for time!  And when it became necessary, I did enough damage!"  Her voice began rising as her temper spiked.  "I don't want to give your Knights a reason to hate me!"  Bringing her hand to her head, she rubbed her temple.  "Ouch, my head hurts."

Immediately contrite, he backed off.   "I'm sorry.  I shouldn't have started in on you."

It was then that it all clicked into place.  Rey noticed his demeanor and tone of voice, and that he was wearing his mask without the mask again.  Her annoyance softened.   "How are you?"  She asked.

"I'm fine."  She saw a look briefly flit across his features, and she rolled her eyes.

"Come here."  She tugged on his hand.  He moved closer, but was still too far away to reach him.   "Closer."  She implored.  He leaned down, and she reached up to stroke his face with her right hand.  Her hand drifted into his hair, while looking deeply into his eyes.   "You've been sitting here this whole time, trying to be the mighty and strong Kylo Ren on the outside, yet all the while you've been a mess on the inside, haven't you?"

She could feel the breath shudder out of him as he dropped his forehead to hers, before looking back up at her with his emotions in his eyes.  He opened the bond – letting her feel everything - his terror at what happened, worry during the surgery and relief that she was going to be all right.   "There you are."  She said softly, as she leaned up to give him a gentle kiss.

"How is it that sometimes you know me better than I know myself?"

"I know you sometimes have trouble dealing with your emotions – and that you tend to become Kylo in those times."  Smirking, she told him.  "But you are getting better at it.  Slowly but surely.  Its pretty easy for me to see the difference now."

He shook his head in wonder at this woman – his other half – and silently thanked every God and ancient in the Force who had given her to him.   Raising his hand, he stroked her cheek gently, and looked over at her bandaged left arm.   "Are you in pain?"

"Other than the headache, not really, no.  But I do feel like I've been trampled by a Luggabeast."  She smiled gently.   "Ben, how is she?  I'd really like to know."

Sighing, he told her,  "I really don't know Rey.   I haven't had a chance to ask.  I'm not even sure why she went after you.  I know she was pissed after Onderon, but –"

"You know about that?"  Surprise was evident in her voice.

"Of course I know.  They were on a mission, and reported in regularly.  Until I called them off."

"You called them off?  When?!"

He rolled his eyes.  "Of course I called them off.  Sometime after our Force bond on Coruscant, I think?  Maybe?  Why does this surprise you?  I had already told you that I had intended to eventually seek the peace treaty."

"I.. I shouldn't have been surprised."  She paused.   "I know why your Knight – Vitka – came after me."

He crossed his arms, raised an eyebrow and waited.  "She... she told me that she wanted to be the Mistress of Ren – to rule by your side.  And that I was standing in her way – because we were sleeping together."

"That Bitch."  She felt his flare of anger before he tamped it down.  "First of all, we are not just sleeping together!"

"I know that!  It pissed me off when she said it, so... I... I...."  She looked away from him.

"You what?"

Her eyes were wary when she looked back at him.  "I said some things that made her mad."

"What did you say?"   He asked, wondering what Rey could've goaded Vitka with.

"I...I told her you loved me."  She could see his eyes go wide as saucers.  "I know it was a stupid thing to do, because she literally went crazy after that...but I just couldn't help it!  I don't want anyone thinking that we're just....just...."  Her eyes became glassy and she couldn't finish.

Leaning down, he kissed her gently, staring deeply into her eyes.   "You really are crazy, you know that?"  Smirking, he shook his head as he told her.  "But I do appreciate the sentiment.  I don't want anyone thinking that either."   He stood up straight and scrubbed a hand over his face.

"But I guess that explains it.  She started throwing herself at me about 3 years ago, and I just kept ignoring it.  I know that eventually Snoke found out and tortured her brutally for it.  I never told her I knew.   I guess she figured now that Snoke is gone she'd try again."  Huffing out a breath he told her.  "I'll comm down to the detention block and let them know that Lady Rey is enquiring about her status.  I, however, couldn't care less.  As far as I'm concerned, she's no longer one of my Knights.  If she's still alive, I'll go down and formally release her from the Knights of Ren sometime soon.  But she will first stand against charges of treason, and will likely face death anyways."

"Ben, no –"

"Its out of my hands Rey.  She acted against my orders, and tried to kill a guest on my ship.  A guest who just happens to be the apparent significant other of the Supreme Leader.  Because of those actions, she's accused of treason, and therefore must stand trial."  The expression on his face clearly showed there would be no arguing with him over this, so she let it be.

Suddenly, she remembered something else.  "Wait!  How is Lt.Tiga?  I can't believe I forgot about him!  I had to leave him lying there... she ignited her saber, and..."

"I can tell you that Lt.Tiga has a major concussion, but it looks like he'll be okay too."

"I'm so glad."  Relief clearly showing on her face.  "He tried to stop it.  He shouldn't have.  Your Knights are dangerous."

"He was trying to protect you.  Because of it, he'll have my eternal gratitude – and likely a promotion."

Rey wrinkled her nose.   "He gets a promotion for protecting me?  I'm not sure I like how that looks to everyone else."

"No.  That's not it."  He shook his head.  "He showed courage – and that's what he'll be promoted for.  He was also foolish, but I will deal with that too."

Rey just looked at him in confusion.   "You're going to deal with his foolishness?  How?"

"I'm going to make him my Ensign – my personal intern – for lack of a better term.  He will learn the ins and outs of command under me."

Her face lit up.  "Ben - I think that's a wonderful idea."  Softly, she added.  "And I think you could use a friend here...."

"Rey, he will not be my friend.  He will be my student – my apprentice – just not in the Force."

She cocked her head and thought about his statement a bit more.  "I'm not too sure about that.   Although the intent is to teach, are Master's and Padawan's not the closest thing to siblings or friends?"

He considered for a minute.  "I hadn't really thought of it that way.  It was different with the Knights – they were already mostly trained, so weren't really apprentices.  I guess one could look at the Master/Padawan relationship that way."  Thinking about it some more, he went on.  "But that's not the intent here.  The purpose is for him to learn, without necessarily being a slave to the old ideology of the First Order."

Rey couldn't help but smile.  She appeared lost in thought.  "What are you thinking about?"

Her face flushed and she looked away.   "I... I was thinking.... That its kind of how you learned. By watching your Mother."  Her gaze flicked up to his, curious to see his reaction.

He stared at her, then right through her, as he became lost in thought and memories.   "Huh."  He inclined his head.   "You might actually be right about that."  Leaning down, he kissed her again.   Somehow, he was sure that his Grandfather and Uncle were laughing right now.