if there was anything that i had learned
from the people that i was surrounded by
it was their method and their technique
the careful placement of their lies
the beautiful tone and a cheating look
to someone standing by them it might seem pleasant
but to the person it was addressed to
that might cripple them with fear
i learned all of that from a room full of people
filled with their middle eastern norms
where they were craving the european touch
barely remembering what they have of their own
i stood for years in dresses and a drink in hand
men watching and women judging as everybody talked
but what made it really easy
what thought me how and when
and around whom was it to put on a shield
was them
i listened on how they talked about people
knowing that when i wasn't around it was the same about me
i learned how to make them believe that they knew all of my pieces
that i trusted them whilst i was skillfully lying
my words were smooth and my red lips appreciated
it sparked jealousy
how many people have i touched with my black inked hands
and they believed that they were trusted
that they were the ones listening and in control
but my eyes that they believed were kind
searched and noted all of their weaknesses
they grasped all of their movements
and my ears always listened in on their words and how they were phrased
i learned how to blend in and give them what they want
to late only stand and face them all
but instead of looking down on them
i looked straight through them and gained back control of my own life
they did not get to dictate who i become
they did not get to tell me who i am