Kagehara spent the weekend researching about different weapons, calculating moves, and then trying them on his nightmares, and died every single time.

On Saturday he was stabbed through the chest when he didn't move away fast enough from a thrust, his greatsword useless against such a speed.

On Sunday, a fast swing cut him on the leg pretty deeply, after the round shield he had been using had broken and before he had been able to do anything with the axe he was yielding, a second swing had beheaded him. 

At least that time it had been fast, almost instantaneous.

On Monday he was exhausted, having rested nearly nothing. At least when he got to school, Hikkari was there.

The boy said hi, being answered back with tiredness.

-Hey, how was your weekend?- she asked, with giant eyebags under her eyes.

He noticed something red on his sleeve.

She quickly hid her arms under the table as soon as she noticed his eyes meeting her wrists.

-So, rough weekend?- he questioned back, trying to sound calm. 

Actually he may or may not had been spending a while researching self harming behavior. Obviously because he could fall into it once he got accostumed to the pain, not because he cared about her, but he was still trying to use the learnt to help. 

-No... Why are you asking?- answered quickly the girl, trying to sound casual.

-Oh I'm glad you had a good weekend then. However I'm going to leave you here my username in this chatting platform in case your state changes.

He quickly took a page out of his sketchbook, and wrote the username in question. Before she could even try to refuse, he left it on her hand.

-Keep it. Anyways, I have way too much free time and too little people to talk to- he justified himself.

Helping people made him feel in control. Also, it would also contribute to his mental health to have someone to talk to.

In a dark place of his mind though, Kagehara remembered when he had almost died trying to "help" that other teenager against Amalgamations the week before, or the Amalgamation hunter who had fallen from the giant metal cage, with his insides just completely destroyed and all his bones broken just to protect the students. He hoped this time it would lead to a better outcome.

-Thanks I guess- said the girl, with an expression hard to decipher, and put the paper away, carefully folded, into her bag.

-By the way, I want to show you something but I don't want to look like a psychopath- said the boy, regretting instantly.

-Erm, what is it?- she asked, looking relieved for the change on the subject.

-Well... Um... So how would I explain this?

He searched through his sketchbook for a short while, traversing through multiple drawings of fighting stances and weapons. Hikkari tried to take a peek, but he quickly turned around when she did, taking the horrific depictions of takedowns, organs and dead bodies away from her sight.

Finally he found the drawing he had been looking for. It looked way worse than he remembered. Like way way worse than expected.

Suddenly his notebook was taken away in a quick, calculated move.

His heart sunk.

Hikkari was staring at the portrait he had done.

Of her.

She looked back, her factions showing something between surprise, apprehension, concern or something else he couldn't recognize.

-Is that me?- she asked, surprised.

-Erm, yes- he managed to mutter.

-Oh, can I keep it?

The boy took a moment to digest those words.

-Wait. Did you like it? Why? When? What? Are you being ironic?- he was shooting questions faster than a machine gun, as soon as they popped up on his head.

-Yeah, it's really cool. I'd like to hang it on my bedroom if you let me- stated Hikkari, her face now lighting up with hope- I mean not the only way I wanna hang myself in my bedroom but you know- she added, not leaving it completely clear whether she was joking or being serious.

-Hey no, don't do the second. But yes, you can keep it I guess, if you don't mind the drawings behind.

If the boy remembered correctly, the drawings behind it weren't that violent or graphic, so it wouldn't be so bad.

-Though I would appreciate it if you didn't look at them. Mind if I erase them real quick?- the quick increase on self-esteem he had just experienced was quickly wearing off.

He tried to reach for the page, but she quickly hid it behind her back.

-Nope, now it's mine- she said, with a smirk.

At least she had smiled, thought the boy. He was being slightly useful apparently, and he tried to focus on that.

He was about to attempt another retrieving of the sheet, but a group of students entered, and he quickly sat back on his respective desk, and was only able to direct a furious stare at Hikkari. She just raised  her middle finger, as she put the other page on a plastic folder with a ton of other school work and empty papers.

At least, he thought, she hadn't found it weird.

The classes went by at a painfully slow pace. Kagehara spent the time drawing, as always, bored while his classmates tried to have fun by throwing random objects across the room.

After the first two hours, people started going outside.

He noticed though, that for once, Hikkari stayed on the classroom too.

-Hey Mr. Artist- she called his attention, pulling out the sheet of paper with the drawing and the one with his username- is this what kids these days call flirting?- she smiled a bit, but some trouble was forming behind her eyes.

-No it's not- the boy noticed it looked like it, but he wasn't interested in the girl in that way. Or was he? At the moment he had more important things on his head.

-Oh. Yeah guessed so. Be careful, girls could get confused- she stated.

-Or boys- finished Kagehara.

-Or non binaries- Added Hikkari.

-Or agenders- Continued the teenager.

They went on, joking around for a bit. 

The boy was being as nice and friendly as he could, and that was exhausting. However he kind of owed her that. In the end, he had to help her, he concluded, not because he cared but as an apology for screaming at the poor girl. Letting your own emotions hurt others, he supposed, was unnacceptable.

The bell rang earlier than he expected, ending their conversation as the class filled up again.

The apparently now friends went both respectively back to their seats. Well maybe not friends, acquaintances? At that point he didn't even know.

After an insufferable eternity, the rest of the day went by, spent mainly by the boy drawing fighting stances and weapons, as always, and Kagehara was finally able to go home, a thankul moment brought by the bell.

He awkwardly said goodbye to Hikkari, as the girl packed her bag painfully slowly, and then he sprinted out through the door. Part of his nightmare-fighting plan was getting into a better physical shape, so he had decided to start running, together with some other muscle-building exercises. Also he would try to find another ways to try and get better at weapon fighting, maybe with a stick, knives or something similar.

After a while running, with several stops, his legs and lungs burnt, as his brain urged him to stop, but he tried his best, stopping only when the pain and exhaustion were too great.

He got home way faster than he usually did, it was satisfying to win the clock a few minutes.

Once home, he prepared himself lunch. Kagehara made way more than he needed or wanted, but he needed the calories. If his body was going to be forced to undergo so much work, it would need way more energy.

The boy forced himself to eat all of the prepared meal. It was hard to take the last bites, but the earlier he could finish up with whatever the nightmare was, the better.

Then he went into his bedroom and finished homework as fast as possible.

Then he opened his computer.

It was supposed to only be used for homework, but he had found a way to surpass the weak defense put on it by the school to be able to use it to chat, play games and search for the things that they wouldn't allow. He hadn't done his research on fighting there though, because he knew the government had surveillance in the search engines. 

But he didn't have research on mind. He opened up his chat app. 

It usually only had one conversation, which hadn't had any new messages in years. He still missed his brother of another womb. He hadn't bothered making any new friends since he passed away.

However, this time, apart from that message of "I miss you" he had never been answered to, there was a chat request, from Hikkari.

He tried his best at supressing the small shot of happiness it gave him. He didn't care. It was only for his own mental health.

Kagehara accepted the request and opened the new chat. 

-Hi- he typed, not knowing exactly what else to say.

-Only a "hi"? Come on, we need to work in your game- she answered, quicker than he expected.

-What game?- he asked, confused.

After a small pause, she answered.

-Nothing. Anyways, how are you doing with your homework?- she asked finally. 

He sighed in relief. For a second, the boy had wondered if in some way he had done something to make her upset.

-Already did them. I was about to get to drawing- he said, trying to make some conversation- And you?

-Well I was about to start with homework. But I got distracted with something- she replied.

A picture started loading. The boy opened it with curiosity. It was a picture of a light yellow colored wall, with a piece of paper attached to the wall. The image finally loaded, showing to his horror, the portrait she had stolen from him a few moments ago, on her wall. 

-Come on, I thought you were joking with hanging it to your wall- he said, trying to contain the anxiety.

-Why would I be joking? It looks really good!- she responded happily- by the way, since you have finished your homework, would you kindly help a poor soul with hers?- she added. 

As he expected, she only wanted him to hand her over the homework, as anyone else he had tried to befriend. That's why he had stopped trying. On the other hand though, it took him nothing to hand her the homework.

-Ok, give me a second- he asked, while he reached for his notebook, with a sigh of disappointment.

-I was joking idiot- she suddenly said- Its not fair that you worked on them and you give them out for free. Though I'd appreciate an explanation of exercise 5 of Maths, if you can- she added.

The teenager let out a second sigh of relief. Maybe it was different this time. 

Kagehara spent the rest of the afternoon explaining to her the homework exercises, and then they continued talking about the most random stuff. He didn't have any time to study his fighting skills, but he allowed himself to have a rest. He would die anyways that night, and she would probably get tired of talking at some point.

After a while talking, he felt tired. He checked the time.

22:38

He panicked for a second in disbelief.

-Erm, Hikkari- he said, cutting the conversation.

-Yeah? What's up?- she replied, weirded out by the sudden change in tone.

-Look at the time- he said as his only answer.

-No way- she replied, in disbelief- I thought it had been only like an hour.

-Yeah same- he said, as his only answer.

And then she added something that would stick to him for the rest of his days:

-I guess it's because it's so nice to talk to you.

His heart exploded in warmth, with a pulsing sensation that grew inside of him, like an expanding sun. Feeling like a god, forgetting he wasn't one.

After a bit more talking, they both decided to continue chatting the next day.

He went off to the kitchen, for some dinner, feeling the happiness still deep inside, rooted to his soul.

After having it, he went back to bed, to try and sleep. He really wanted to see his instructor for once. The fighting seemed more and more exciting everyday. Death after a while stopped being so bad. The pain was still there, and sometimes he still had to go vomit after some specially painful deaths, but the more Kagehara fought the least it would last.

With those thoughts, he fell asleep.

Suddenly he was on the field. However the sky was slightly more cloudy, and the usual breeze was more like a cold wind. He could feel humidity in the air.

His instructor was staring at the lanscape, turning his back to him.

-Hey Mr. No Name, how are you doing?- he asked, encouraged.

He as snapped his fingers as the only answer, a pile of weapons appearing in front of the boy.

With no other response, Kagehara started looking through the items. He finally chose a rapier and then as back up, a short straight dagger. He then remembered that was a tiring weapon combination, and today he wanted to stay for a while.

-Hey, can we fight today with wooden weapons or something for a while? I want to practice for longer- he offered.

-I told you. I have to kill you- he said, with a defeated voice. 

The man sounded tired, and also filled with a deep sorrow.

-Are you ok?- asked the boy, suddenly finding himself empathic- we can spar with the wooden weapons and then fight one with the real ones- he reasoned.

-Ok, twenty minutes of sparring. But with one condition. You can't tell anyone what I tell you while we spar. Never, ever- he stated.

-What are you talking abo- a sword covered on some kind of foam appeared on his hand. It was a longsword, with an intrinsic wooden hilt- ok I guess.

He dashed towards him, now a wooden sword on his hand and the same shield embraced. 

-Be thankful I gave you the sword you liked- he said, the words muffled by his mask, which did not help much at hiding the tears that rolled down his cheeks.

-Are you sure you are alri- the sword hit his own, forcing him to react, by parrying to the left.

-Listen to me, you have to stop talking to that girl- he stated, with an imperative tone- they will go after her. You can make no bonds- he continued.

-What do you mean?- asked Kagehara, confused- Who is they? How do you know about Hik- the sword stopped his words again.

-Don't say her name- he stopped him- don't mention anything about her to me. You will put her in more danger than she already is.

-What is going on? What are you even going abo- another blow, now a high cut aimed at his head, cut his speech, as the wood hit the soft protection of his blade.

-I can't tell you much, but there is people who want to make sure you don't have any bond to anyone, so keep away from her. And this isn't part of the dream or an imagination as you are thinking. This is real. They will kill her. With no regards for anything.

With a final blow, now the sword turned into the usual silver colored one, he stabbed through his heart.

His limbs got heavy, as he quickly bled out.

-Why? We were sparring- he asked, surprised and filled with a burning pain that only got colder and colder.

-They found me. I'm sorry- he explained-next time we will spar for longer ok? Remember what we talked- he added.

Kagehara then fell to the floor.

The tears were still falling from the figure's eyes, as he, without noticing the boy's eyes, looked up at the sky. 

-I will make sure she doesn't end up like you, Taichi.