*****186:

They were saying goodbye to a couple of investigators, who they had challenged to baptism. It was warm out, balmy, oceany. More so today, with a fairly steady breeze pushing pollution out to sea. They'd decided to go get an early lunch at McDonalds since they were downtown and hadn't had a burger in awhile.

He pulled his helmet on, snapped it carelessly, adjusted his heavy backpack full of books and straddled his bike. They peddled the few blocks, ordered and picked up their sacks at the window, peddled another block to a shaded park and dismounted, talking casually about their experience, waving to a few cars who honked at them good-naturedly.

His phone vibrated. He pulled it out of his pocket, surprised that she would be calling again so soon. It had only been a day. He gave his companion a bemused look and then flipped his phone open.

"Hey." He greeted expecting the worst.

Her voice was very soft, but the joy transmitted itself in the musical quality she permeated. Relief flooded him. "Hi."

"What's going on?" he had to ask, there needed to be a reason this time, he couldn't very well justify...

"I'm in the NICU at ABCSC. I'm holding-- and I just finished nursing... our new daughter. Thought you'd want to be the first to know, you're almost a dad-- Again!"

Richard's hand—bringing the Big Mac to his lips—stopped in mid-air. A queasy sense of disconnect swirled around him as he felt his insides melting. He took off the helmet, kicked the stand on his bike and retreated to a sitting position on the grass. 

His companion looked at him curiously, knowing who called that phone and having been apprised of the previous two calls, was slightly concerned, but not too prying. He opened his sack and took out one of his three Big Mac's.

"I think that is the most unexpected thing anyone has ever said to me. And you've said some pretty weird things, but that one needs an explanation. Are you okay?" he waggled his brows at his companion urging him to go ahead and eat. The dizziness receded as he leaned carefully and uncomfortably against a tree. His butt squirmed against the protruding roots and he moved to get a flat surface. He had tried to keep his voice and tone normal, but his insides were shaking.

"She's beautiful, Richard. She has brown hair-- no, let me start again, she has your brown hair and your olive skin tones!" She was giggling, giddy with her exquisite knowledge. He couldn't help but smile. "I'm telling you... that is, if you still want me, I assume you do after our last conversation... that you're a dad, or, you will be again, soon, or something like that...."

A bird cawed overhead and Richard looked up automatically, not really expecting to see it.

  A dad... he thought to himself... The father of a daughter.

"Hey, I'm so sorry! Are you busy? I forget the time difference. It's the middle of the night here, what time is it there?"

He eyed his companion who was staring at the red creeping up from Richard's collar. "It's lunch time, and no, it's okay, we're at a park eating McDonald's. Not busy, your timing was pretty good. I'm even sitting down. Don't you want a guy to be sitting when you tell him such shocking news? I mean, I didn't even know we were... expecting."

At this, Elder Anders glanced up in surprise, both eyebrows matching Richard's previously shocked expression. Richard's face was completely red.

"Kylie had her baby. She's two weeks early and weighs 4 pounds. She's really little, smaller than the twins, Richard. But she's all here, and perfect, so perfect. I can take her home anytime. Don't you want to name her?"

Richard drew in a very startled breath, looking overhead through the leafy late autumn trees, in the balmy salt-tinged air, imprinting this moment in his mind forever. 

He gulped air, to be sharing-- even briefly-- this kind of bewildering moment with his future wife was beyond comprehension. It was like having two worlds collide. He taught about families every day, about the sanctity of parental responsibility, but even though he had allowed himself to contemplate his impending step-fatherhood, he hadn't really ever pictured this kind of announcement-- he doubted if any missionary had. Maybe the early saints who went overseas, who were already married, left a pregnant wife at home. 

But he hadn't....

"Name her for her mother." He said softly, closing his eyes now, to block out the surreal morning sun, the wrong place and wrong time, suddenly. He was picturing the insulated darkness of a Newborn ICU, the beeping monitor's, the little mother in her little rocker, holding the sweet new child close, having given her first meal. He was thinking of that baby's mother, his wife-- his future wife-- and wanted to name her for her.

Another wave of red flushed up from collar to forehead at that thought.

"Kylie Ann." She said musically. "I love it, Richard, we'll call her for her biological mommy. Kylie Ann."

"Kylie Ann." He repeated, startled at the twist his own words had offered her, and felt his companion's eyes piercing him, so he opened his and shrugged. "This is way out of my league, bro." He stammered in defeat. "Never done this before, never felt this before; give me a break, okay?" 

Anders nodded and took another bite.

"Is this a bad time, Richard? I'm sorry."

"Tracy, you're fine, it's okay. I guess this was news that couldn't wait."

"Are you... happy? Freaked out? Are you okay?" Her voice was mixed with apprehension.

He laughed. "This is... different. She's not Casey's kid, or Raine's kids, she's yours and.... Mine... and I.... yeah, you caught me by surprise. You didn't mention adopting Kylie's baby."

"I mentioned Kylie, didn't I?"

"Numerous times." He agreed, unwrapping his sandwich and holding it in mid-air, poised to eat, but not making the contact. "You were very impressed with her courage and very upset about what happened to her. And you never once mentioned the thought that you might.... But it's okay. It's so.... You. And I-- I love her for you...." he shrugged at his companion again. "I have to change direction right now, my other life is intruding, I'll be back to focus in just a second."

"Do you need some privacy bro?"

Richard shook his head. "No, eat, please. It's okay; just remember whatever you hear is between you and me."

"Honestly, no one would believe the side of this I'm hearing anyway." Anders quipped and went back to chewing enthusiastically, in marked unconcern.

"Is that your companion? Tell him I said hi."

"She says to tell you hi."

Anders nodded.

"So, Richard, I know you're busy, and I should let you go and not talk to you again till the airport, but I have to know. I did this without consulting you, but it's okay, isn't it? You're not mad or anything."

He loved that she wanted to please him, that she considered her actions suddenly, if belatedly, in his light. He smiled in chagrin. "Honey, it's okay, I'm happy for you. I wouldn't want it any other way, I have the feeling that you will save the world one baby at a time. Hopefully, I can afford them all. Here, I want this moment to be a true first.... Put the phone down to her ear... I want to do this right...."

"Are you serious?" Tracy cried in astonishment.

"Just do it, Trace, before I lose my nerve."

He waited a second then closed his eyes. This is real, he thought, a real person, there was no doubt that he was going to marry this child's adopted mother, and that she would be a part of his life for.... Ever. 

All her little girl woes, her first steps, her first words, her first day of kindergarten, her first baseball game, her first time to catch a fish.... He'd carry her piggy back, he'd tramp through the forest with her, hunting, or hiking, or maybe attend a daddy-daughter party at church with her.

 He took a deep breath. "Hey, Kylie, this is... your daddy." 

He opened his eyes briefly to see Anders staring at him in slacked-jawed awe. 

He closed them again, picturing once again the first prom, teaching her to drive a car, scuba diving... 

"I want you to know baby girl, that I love you very much, and your momma loves you, probably more than you can believe right now, but we do, and it's going to be okay, everything is going to be okay." 

He pictured the little hand curled against Tracy's, a baby hand, he realized he was seeing Steven's hand and a wave of pain flooded him, choked him up. There wasn't any Tracy without pain, and there wasn't any Tracy without babies. All of it was just a part of her. A part he couldn't live without. 

"Hey little Kylie Ann, be a good girl for Daddy, okay? Keep your momma in line till I get back, all right? I love you, baby."

"You told her you love her." Tracy said in wonder. "Those are almost the first words I said to her too."

"She's separated from the only other momma she's ever known, it must be traumatizing." 

"It's so cool that you talked to her. I didn't expect that. You were wonderful."

"Not so wonderful." He admitted. "But that's a forever relationship; I better get it right from the start, no matter what or where I am. I think the Lord would approve in this case. All things would be better in order, but who's to say what order your life has taken? Maybe this is the right order for you, Trace. Maybe this is the way it needs to be."

"Timing is always a little off for me, isn't it, Richard? Do you really think it's supposed to be this way? It seems kind of crazy."

He shook his head slowly and sighed. "No, it's always the way it's supposed to be for you, babe. Amazingly enough, it's just the way things are for you. I will never doubt timing again in your life."

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