(No Control | Holding Me Ransom - 83 - Break These Clocks, Forget About Time)

When I wake up the following morning, the bed is Jess-less. I roll onto my back and grin to myself at the amazing sex last night in the shower and wonder if she will be up for round two, wherever she is. The time on the clock is three minutes past seven, and I reckon if we're quick we can squeeze a quickie in before anyone else wakes up. I slide out of bed, pull on a pair of jogging bottoms just in case there is anyone else up, and quickly brush my teeth in the bathroom before heading downstairs in search of Jess. I hear voices coming from the kitchen; specifically Mum talking about babies.

"What's this about babies?" 

Jess is wearing a tshirt and pyjama bottoms and Mum is in her dressing down. They're both nursing cups of tea and beaming at me.

"Your mum was just saying Louis wants us to call in this week," she replies, sliding off her stool and selecting a mug out of the cupboard, presumably for me.

"We can pop in today, if you want," I nod. "I've booked a viewing of that property above the Sunset Strip for tomorrow, I mentioned to Kendall we might be free on Monday to hang out, and then Tuesday is my birthday."

Jess frowns at me. "Your birthday? Tuesday is your birthday?"

She thinks she's so funny and cute. She's right.

"You're not funny," I fib.

"I am though," she grins. "Aren't I? Admit it. You're dying to smirk."

I smirk, for fuck's sake. "I'm humouring you."

That's a lie. I just can't help but smile around her.

"Fibber," she calls me out, and passes me a freshly made steaming mug of tea.

"So do you want me to ring Louis?" I ask, easing myself onto the stool next to her while Mum watches on in amusement.

"I'll ring him myself," she retorts, and I raise an eyebrow at her cockiness. I can tell she's bluffing by the gentle flush that creeps up her neck as soon as she has spoken.

"Really?" I counter. "Be my guest."

This should be good.

"My phone's upstairs," she shrugs, leaning her elbows on the worktop casually. One slips off. She's hilarious.

"Use mine," I grin. I pull it out of the pocket of my joggers and slide it pointedly with one finger across the breakfast bar towards her. There is absolutely no way she'll ring Louis in front of me, and we both know it.

"It's too early, he'll still be asleep," she flounders, and manages to change the subject. "Speaking of which, why are you up at this hour? I'm the one who's jet-lagged. I thought you'd be dead to the world."

I'll the Louis scenario go, for now.

"I woke up and you weren't next to me," I tell her. "I mean, you just never know what a crazy fan might do... steal my underwear, ruin my shirts... hey!" I complain as she flicks my arm. I reach my arm around her and grab her in a tight hold and tickle her until she begs for release. 

"Why don't I make us some breakfast, then we'll get ourselves ready and see if Louis is up for visitors?" I suggest, letting go of her to let her catch her breath.

"Finally, a decent plan," she huffs cheekily, so I grab her and tickle her again until she screams. When I finally release her she runs across the kitchen out of reach and leans on the door frame, panting.

"You get in the shower first then, while I do breakfast," I decide. "I know how long it takes you to get ready. We'll be here until lunchtime otherwise."

I can't disguise my smirk at this blatant provocation, and she points her finger at me from the safety of the hallway. "Thin ice, Styles."

She disappears off upstairs and while I'm waiting for the bread to toast I ring Louis. He answers almost straight away.

"H," he greets me.

"I've got an excited fan here who is desperate for a meet and greet with you and the smallest Tomlinson," I explain. 

"Understandable," he replies.

"You free this morning?"

"Yeah man, up until about one."

"I'll let her know. No flirting though."

"I'm sure she'll do her best to keep it under control," he jokes.

"I mean you, knobhead."

"Sure about that?" he teases. "See you later."

I shake my head as I put the phone down and am surprised when Jess appears about fifteen minutes later, fully dressed and wearing her usual makeup. This must be some kind of a record. 

As we're getting in the car, Jess decides she wants to stop somewhere on the way. "If I'd known we would be visiting Louis I would have brought a present with me for Freddie," she says. "I don't want to turn up empty handed, but I'd been hoping I'd get an opportunity to buy something while I was here and leave it with you to pass on."

"I've got an unopened packet of earplugs in the house," I joke. "You can wrap those up and give them to Louis if you want."

She gives me a deadpan look and I can't help grinning. "Kidding. We can make a detour if you like."

"Do you know any good baby shops?" 

I can't resist. "To buy a baby?"

"Harry," she sighs, and I laugh delightedly out loud. I love it when we take the piss out of each other like this. Or rather, when I take the piss out of her and she gets pretend-cross with me. 

"Yes, I know some good baby shops," I finally answer. "But I would advise against us going in together. If we're pictured... well, I don't need to elaborate. I can drop you on the corner, though."

It's one thing being pictured out together and going public. It's a whole other thing being photographed buying baby clothes, even if my bandmate has just become a dad. That won't matter to the media. Or the Larries, for that matter. And Louis doesn't need anything ruining his entrance to fatherhood, especially not crackpot conspiracy theories. 

"Good thinking," she nods. "I won't be long."

"You won't be long?" I tease. "In a shop...?" I give her an exaggerated expression of disbelief as she pulls a face at me.

"You've got a death wish today. There will be no birthday presents for you at this rate."

I drop her off on the corner of a block and point her in the direction of a couple of nice baby boutiques, and then complete a couple of circuits of the block until I catch sight of her ambling along the street looking over her shoulder for me, and pull over to let her into the car. 

As we approach Calabasas I ring Louis to let him know we're on our way. He must be looking out for us because the gates of the house swing open as we approach. I pull up the driveway and bring the car to a stop next to Louis' Range Rover.

"Now," I begin as I kill the engine and unclip my seatbelt, pointing my finger at her as though to scold a naughty child, "no fangirling."  She scoffs and pushes my finger away and I chuckle to myself. "Who am I kidding? Of course there will be fangirling."

"I can't help it if Louis fangirls over me," she retorts, and for once I can't think of a witty comeback, and allow her that point. As we walk towards the front door it opens to reveal Louis standing there, his hair a mess, looking tired.

"Well well, look who's here," he smirks. He envelops Jess in a hug as she congratulates him, and gives me a high five. "It's good to see you both. Come in. You want a brew?"

"Yeah, please," I nod. He leads us into the kitchen and we chat while he brews up.

"How's Freddie?" Jess asks, a little shyly.

"Ah, he's great," Louis beams at Jess. "He's just so small, y'know? He's got these tiny little hands and feet, and his fingernails... they're just miniature! He's got a good pair of lungs on him, though. Must take after me. There's no escaping that wail at three a.m. when he's hungry. He has no concept of the time of day whatsoever."

"Told you the earplugs would have been a good idea," I nudge Jess.

"Mate, earplugs wouldn't mask the lad's crying," Louis declares. "But Briana's doing a great job. She's knackered though. We're trying our best to do it ourselves, but it's hard when were not a couple. We're lucky we've got so much help with our families and stuff."

"Is your family over?" Jess asks, looking over her shoulder towards the hallway.

"Yeah, they're staying at my house," Louis nods. "Everyone's out shopping though. I convinced them I'd be fine. Briana's in the lounge with Freddie. Shall we go through?"

He leads us through to the lounge where we sat last time, and it looks a little less like an explosion in a baby shop than last time.

Briana is in a chair holding a sleeping Freddie, and smiles as we enter. 

"Hi," she says quietly, holding Freddie out to Louis as he sets a glass of water down next to her.

"Hi Briana," Jess says from behind me, in the same shy tone. 

"He's due a feed soon," Briana says, to everyone. "He won't be asleep much longer."

"I'm Jess," Jess says, holding a small gift bag out to Briana. "I got you this. It's just a little something... I thought you might appreciate a bit of time to yourself..." 

 I can tell Briana wasn't expecting this and takes the bag from Jess with a small "Oh!" of surprise. I watch with interest as she opens the bag and pulls out some toiletries that say 'New Mum' on them, and beams at Jess before standing up to embrace her. "Oh, wow, that is so thoughtful. Thank you so much."

"You're welcome," Jess beams back. "How are you?"

"Oh, you know," she replies in an over-casual tone. "Exhausted. Surviving on no sleep. Emotional. But apart from that, absolutely great." She looks over at Louis and Freddie, her eyes dancing, and then looks back at Jess. "Do you want to hold him?"

Jess's face lights up. "I would love to! If that's OK..."

"Of course! Louis, don't hog him," she scolds. "Let Jess have a turn."

I watch Jess with a funny feeling in my stomach as Louis hands Freddie to her. She takes him gently in her arms, carefully supporting his head, and eases herself onto the sofa between me and Louis. She gazes down at him, smiling adoringly, and I have the weirdest flash of imagination that one day I will watch her gazing down at our baby like this, with love, excitement and adoration in her eyes. My stomach performs a slow roll and my arms break out in goosebumps. I look away only to catch Louis' eye who is watching me with a knowing look on his face, smirking. I raise my eyebrows at him but his expression doesn't change, and I have a horrible notion that he knows exactly what I am thinking. I can feel my face getting hot.

"I'm going to take a bath," Briana says, breaking the moment. "There's a bottle in the fridge if he wakes up, it just needs warming through. Make sure you test it on your arm first, to check it's not too hot."

"I know," Louis replies. "Take your time."

"Nice meeting you, Jess," she says, smiling from the doorway. "Thank you so much for the presents."

There is a moment of silence as all of us stare down at the small bundle in Jess's arms. 

And then: "I can't believe I'm holding Louis Tomlinson's baby," Jess announces, and Louis and I both laugh, exchanging knowing looks.

"He's pretty amazing, isn't he," Louis agrees, reaching his finger over to Freddie and pulling his fist out to show us. "See what I mean about his fingernails? Look at them. Did you ever see anything so small and cute, and perfect?"

"Proud dad," Jess smiles, and he grins.

"Sorry. Am I gushing too much?"

"Not at all!" she replies. "It's nice to see you so happy and relaxed. I'm so pleased for you, Louis. He's absolutely gorgeous."

"Definitely takes after me," he quips, puffing his chest out in pride.

"There's a little present for Freddie in the other bag," Jess says, nudging the gift bag at our feet. "And a card for you, too."

I pick it up and hand it to Louis, and he reaches inside and pulls out a small plush blue rabbit and smiles affectionately. "Ah, that's awesome. Thanks, love."

We fall silent again, watching Freddie sleeping, and Louis gives a small sigh. "I could literally stare at him for hours."

We all murmur in acknowledgement, before Louis adds, "So, where's mine?" 

I look up to see him looking expectantly at Jess, a hint of mischief in his eyes.

"Where's your what?" she asks.

"My present," he supplies. "Briana got one. Freddie got one. Where's mine?"

I watch her for her reaction, worried for a second that she won't know that he's playing with her. "You got a hug from me," she retorts. "What more do you want?"

If there's one thing that Louis loves, it's someone who gives him shit right back.

He cackles, watching her with a suggestive smirk on his face and I know what's coming before the words even leave his lips. "That is the sixty-four thousand dollar question."

He's so fucking predictable.

"Oi," I warn. "Over the line. Pack it in."

"Just teasing, Harold," Louis placates me. "Keep your knickers on."

"Keep yours on," I mutter, looking at Freddie so I won't rise to any more of his bait, the little fucker.

"Chill," he moans. "I'm with Danielle. I'm just messing."

I pull my phone out of my pocket to take a photo of Jess holding Freddie. 

"Oh yeah, how is Danielle?" Jess is asking.

"She's great, thanks. Things are going really well."

"You don't seem to have made any attempt to keep it under wraps," she observes.

"We did at first, but in my experience the paps back off when you admit to being in a relationship because they're not desperate to be the first to break the exclusive," Louis explains. "And Danielle's used to media attention anyway. She's in the industry."

Louis has always taken this approach to his relationships - the complete opposite to the way I have chosen to handle them. He swears by it, and I'm starting to think he might have it nailed.

"We've come to the same conclusion," I admit, and he snaps his head up from Freddie to look at me, and then Jess.

"You two are finally going public with your relationship?"

"Yeah," Jess beams, and he grins at us both.

"Well about bloody time. Congrats, both of you. I'm really pleased for you."

"Thanks," I beam.

"How long are you going to be in LA, Jess?" Louis asks, turning to her again. "You got any other plans?"

"I fly back on the sixth. We've got a few plans I think but mainly just chilling."

"The sixth?" he repeats. "That's when I fly back. Are you flying into Heathrow? Do you want to come back on the jet with me and my family?" I watch as her face lights up. "There's plenty of room," he continues. "You might as well, rather than flying alone. You're more than welcome."

"Really?" she squeals, and I think he might have just made her year.

"Of course," he smiles. "It'll be fun."

All chill has been abandoned, and for once it isn't me!

"Thanks," she beams. "That would be awesome!"

Freddie stirs, making that scuffly baby sound, and opens his eyes. 

"Awww," Jess coos. "Hi, Freddie." 

There is a pause while Freddie considers this greeting, and then open his mouth to emit a loud wail.

"Someone's hungry," Louis announces. "I'll go and heat up his bottle."

Jess manoeuvres in her arms so he is more upright and facing towards her and ever so gently bounces him on her knee. His wail stops abruptly and his eyes stare in her direction while his small arms move up and down. 

"You are such a handsome man," Jess tells him, in a soft voice. "Yes you are. Such a handsome man. Are you hungry? Your bottle is coming now... yes it is! Your daddy has gone to get it. Yes he has! Oh, you are so cute. How are you so cute?"

Freddie makes another little snuffle and Jess opens her eyes wide as if he has just told her something outrageous. 

"Did you?" she says to him. "And did you tell your daddy?"

Freddie grumbles again and Jess nods sympathetically. 

"Well that's good," she says seriously, as though they are having a full blown conversation. "You have been busy, haven't you? Yes you have. Such a busy boy!"

While this is fascinating and hilarious to watch, Freddie isn't distracted from his stomach for long. He begins to whimper, and Jess, as though she is some sort of baby whisperer, gets to her feet and and places him against her chest, walking slowly round the room with him and rubbing his back gently, whispering in his ear until Louis re-enters the room with Freddie's bottle.

"You're a natural," he comments, taking the words out of my mouth as easily as he takes the now screaming Freddie from Jess's arms.

"Are you being sarcastic?" she asks, one eyebrow raised in indignation.

"No!" he chuckles, sitting down again and positioning Freddie in the crook of his arm. "He's yelling because he's hungry, not because of anything you've done." 

We watch as Freddie waves his arms around, his mouth wide open and clearly searching for something. The second the bottle touches his lips he clamps onto it and the room falls silent.

"It's like a mute button," I observe.

"A dummy has the same effect," Louis explains. "But Briana doesn't like him having one. She doesn't want him to be dependent on it."

"Do you agree on stuff like this?" Jess wonders, watching Louis and Freddie.

"On some stuff," Louis nods. "So far it's been fine, but I can't imagine it being plain sailing forever. We're bound to disagree on stuff. I've already said I want to take him to my house overnight, once he's a little bit older, but she's not keen on the idea."

"She probably can't imagine being away from him for that long," Jess ponders. "But I'm sure she'll agree, once you've got him in a routine."

"Yeah," Louis says, a little sadly. "I hope so. She doesn't seem happy about me being with Danielle, either. I think she hoped we might make a go of things for Freddie's sake."

I had wondered how this would play out. I can't help feeling a bit sorry for Briana, and for Louis: thrown together into one of the most stressful situations in the world, having barely known each other five minutes.

"Her hormones are bound to be all over the place," Jess points out. "Give her time to adjust to this, and yourself as well. It's a life-changing event for both of you. I'm sure you'll work out arrangements that suit you all, in time."

"Thanks," Louis smiles. "You're right, of course."

"Of course," she grins.

"You've got a good'un here," Louis says to me, again with that knowing smile.

"I know," I acknowledge, catching Jess' eye and feeling that same twinge in the pit of my belly. "I don't plan on letting her go again."

"See that you don't," Louis nods, and all three of us watch Freddie devour the contents of the bottle before falling asleep contentedly in Louis' arms.

---***---

April 2023's Camp NaNoWriMo isn't going as well as I'd hoped. I'm still only on just over 5k words half way through the month, with a target of either 30k, or completing the book. I haven't been as strict with myself as I usually am, but I'm determined to smash as much as I can for the rest of the month. To get myself in the zone I decided to post this chapter so I hope you enjoy it! I'll be back again soon with the next one.