My nerves were still frayed as we walked along the marina. Clutching my tote bag, I glanced at the items inside. Strengthened by Cameron's reassurance, I had packed a T-shirt, the ridiculously short shorts, a towel and a pair of swim trunks. The heat begged me to get changed right away, but I had a feeling those items would remain in my bag for the rest of the day.

We approached an absurdly large motorboat and Chris grinned like a kid at the circus. He must have rented the beast.

Dante shook his head. "Do you even know how to drive a boat, Chris?"

Chris turned and waved his arms in a gesture of mild annoyance. "I get no credit. No credit at all." The boat loomed behind him, appearing to be on Dante's side in the argument.

Dante was about to reply when a sleek sports car pulled up behind us. The driver appeared, wearing large sunglasses and a uniform that was a mix between something more fashionable and a sailor's uniform. Dark hair fell in waves down her back, glossy enough to compete with Cameron's.

"Hi there, guys," she said, smiling brightly.

Chris walked up to her and shook her hand. "Hi, you must be Charlie."

"At your service. If you could just help me get my baby ready. It will be faster if we work together." With swift efficiency, she guided us to ropes and knots while telling us what to do. I must have turned a deaf ear because I had no idea what I was doing.

Cameron came to help me. "Like this," he said, disentangling the knot and hauling the rope to the boat. I felt relieved and a little bit annoyed at the same time. He made everything seem so easy.

I looked up just in time to see Dante and Chris sharing a moment. "You want more credit?" Dante said, to which Chris grinned and shook his head. "I'll give you credit later."

Cameron chuckled. "They fit well together."

My chest clenched with envy. It wasn't right of me to harbor any ill will against them, and I didn't, but seeing them together made it blatantly obvious that my relationship with Gabriel hadn't been enough. He'd never been able to give me what I truly longed for, and I was beginning to think that he'd never even had the intention of meeting me halfway.

He didn't love me enough.

"Hey, you're shaking." Cameron's hand touched my shoulder.

"Not now. Please." My voice wavered, hesitant as my aching heart warred with my body that longed for comfort even as I feared it.

Cameron stepped away. "Let's get on the boat. I think we're ready to leave." He held out a hand to help me aboard. A simple gesture, but taking it would mean something. The first step on a journey—a signal that I needed their help to move forward.

The touch was light, then steady. His hand around mine, palms warm in their embrace. When he let go, I suddenly felt alone.

Charlie steered the boat across the open sea while the rest of us marveled at the beauty around us. The water was clear, and where it was shallow enough to see the sea floor, we could see fish swimming among the reefs. I wanted to dive into the waves, especially since I was wearing too much beneath the relentless sun, but diving in with clothes on was a stupid option.

It wasn't until we slowed that I realized how the breeze had helped us stay moderately cool. I would be sweating in no time, and my itching nerves failed to help the situation. Eager to get off the boat, I stared at the long island stretched out before us—a strip of forest along a beach that seemed endless.

"If you wanted underwater photos, there's a nice spot over there." Charlie pointed to our left. "It's not a big reef, but the one on the other side of the island is always crowded with divers."

"We're not going ashore?" I asked, worried as I realized that the beach was pristine rather than lined with docks. The boat had no way of getting close without getting stranded.

"We can get ashore on the other side of the island, but I didn't think you'd need it," Charlie replied.

The others looked at me, sharing uneasy glances. I turned away and fought the tears that threatened to well up and join the salty water beneath us. One drop would make no difference to the sea, but it would to me. I didn't deserve to cry.

Chris walked up beside me. "Adam, talk to me, please."

"About what?" I sounded like a zombie. Dead. Everything locked away where no one could find it.

"Are you still upset that we brought you along?"

"Yes." No. Yes. I wasn't sure.

"You know we're here to help you, not judge you. So you can talk to us." Chris' patience was definitely running thin. I could hear it in his voice.

"Then don't judge me. Just leave me alone."

He sighed. "You'll die of a heat stroke in those clothes. At least try to find some shade."

Finding shade sounded like a good idea, but the boat wasn't offering much of that.

Cameron and Dante had changed into their trunks, showing off enough skin to make anyone uneasy. I fled into the boat's interior and hoped they would leave me be. They could take their photos then we could get out of here.

I heard one splash, then another as they dove into the water. Waiting for the third splash, I raked fingers through my hair and tried to temper my anxiety. The sound of bare feet tapping on the deck brought me to a halt. Turning my head, I saw Cameron in the opening—almost a silhouette against the bright sky.

He had a towel over his shoulders, shielding most of his exposed skin. "Mind if I sit down."

I didn't reply.

He took a seat and initiated a silence that only worsened the situation. After a few minutes, I couldn't stand it.

"Shouldn't you be taking photos?" Irritation simmered in the words. It was irrational and uncalled for, but I was far too confused to think clearly.

"You're my assistant."

"Am I?"

He closed his eyes, the long lashes touching his cheeks. "It's only us out here. You don't have to be afraid."

"Afraid of what?" I challenged.

Seconds passed, and I could see that he was unsure of what to say. It almost seemed like a victory, but a victory over what, exactly?

"Do you trust me?"

Yes. "I don't know."

He shook his head ever so slightly and reached for my hands. "I know he abused you, Adam. Chris knows. Dante knows. We're here to be on your side. We're here because we care."

I swallowed hard, nostrils flaring. Why couldn't they just leave me alone? Wasn't it enough that they had dragged me across the ocean?

"I hate to push, but I can't stand seeing you so distanced when I know that you're fighting to get out just as much as we're fighting for you."

Drained. Drowned. I didn't know how I felt. I couldn't tell the difference. Was there even a difference?

I tried to retract my hands, but his hold didn't budge.

"I'm tired of fighting," I said.

His thumb caressed my damp skin. "I'm not tired of fighting for you, but I don't want to fight against you."

My heart clenched. "What do you want from me?"

Desperate. Another word added to the pile.

"I want you to be happy. That's all I want."

I managed to get out of his hold, confused and far too fragile.

"I need to be alone."

He stood up. "All right, but drink some water at least." He got a water bottle from the mini fridge and threw it in my direction.

I stared at the boat's interior until the sound a third splash reached me. With a deep sigh, I leaned back and closed my eyes. Finally.

A few minutes later, the boat engine roared alive and a cool breeze rushed over my soaked skin.

"You all right down there?" Charlie asked. "I can't run the AC for long, though."

"Thanks."

She smiled. "You know. The others are quite far off. If you want to swim, I won't peek." I wondered if she knew. Had they told her?

She disappeared from view, leaving me to deal with that option on my own. Swimming sounded amazing, and if I could do it alone, then perhaps.

The decision was made for me a while later when the AC shut down. "We won't have enough fuel if I keep the engine running," Charlie yelled from outside.

The heat returned with a vengeance, and I quickly searched my bag. No one will see. I changed and hid as well as I could beneath the large towel. Refusing to look at my bruises, I stepped into the sunlight.

From the deck, I could see the others swimming closer to the island. They laughed at something, loud and clear. Cameron held a camera in his hand, probably snapping pictures of the happy couple. Tearing my eyes away, I faced the other direction, seeing nothing but open water and a few islands in the distance. Charlie was right, no one would see me.

"I won't look," she added, as if she heard my thoughts.

"Thanks." Hoping that she was telling the truth, I dropped the towel and dove into the waves, instantly relieved even though the water was warm.

I had loved swimming ever since I was a kid. Mom used to take me and my sister to a pool in the city during winter, and to a lake nearby when the weather had allowed. Thinking back to those carefree days was a cold reminder that I hadn't seen them since Christmas. Of course, we had talked on the phone, especially since Chris had reminded me that I hadn't been talking to them enough. However, I still hadn't told them about Gabriel since he'd forbidden it.

My muscles tensed and relaxed with each stroke. The water felt like a soothing balm—a familiar embrace. It was strange to realize how much I had missed swimming. Gabriel had taken that away from me as well. He always left marks. In the beginning, they had been faint, but these were more difficult to ignore.

I turned around, floating on my back, waving my arms in lazy movements. Squinting at the light blue sky, I felt the first precious moments of peace in a long time. It was as if something unfurled inside of me—a knot unraveling. Perhaps they had been right to force me out of Gabriel's reach. With the added distance I would have a better chance at figuring out what I needed to do. Away from him, it was easier to see a way out. It was easier to see a future without him, one where I decided what I could or couldn't do. I would begin my sessions with Cameron again. I would wear the clothes I loved and hang out with the friends I liked.

But, was it really that simple? Was I ready to move on just like that, or was I grasping for whatever sanity I had left? Would I still think like this in a few hours? I wasn't sure.

With measured strokes, I eventually swam back to the boat as I couldn't risk letting the others reach it before me. Missing the water as soon as I left it, I climbed the ladder and stepped onto the deck, searching for my towel.

"Adam."

I froze, feeling nothing but my racing heart. I couldn't move. The response was completely out of my control.

Cameron crossed the deck, swept my towel from a chair and placed it carefully around me.

My shallow breathing refused to calm. "You saw."

He nodded.

"I didn't want you to see."

"I know."

It wasn't his fault, but that held little comfort. He had seen everything, all that I wanted to keep hidden—every bruise that told the truth about my weak character. I should have left him when he'd hit me the first time. They would all judge me for staying as long as I had.

"Don't tell anyone."

He nodded as if he understood. The gesture unlocked my limbs, allowing me to take refuge inside the boat.

I needed to breathe.