Jungkook's POV-

The last few days had gone by quickly and smoothly at first, but as the next week began each day got harder and harder.

Yoongi kept up his end of the deal and I kept up mine as we went over (as he kept repeating little by little) the things that had happened leading up to the incident.

I remembered more of our date which caused me to remember more about the art class and the gorgeous restaurant we went to and how he told me he loved me (I also to his feigned annoyance remembered how he specifically said he might let me top him.)

All of it was wonderful, beautiful even, to be able to hear him retell those little pieces of our beginning.

But with all the good things I was forced to remember the bad too.

Like the man in the restaurant... how he followed us to the river... and took pictures.

Remembering this also triggered memories of Irene probably sending him and then memories of her gifts she'd sent.

Yoongi was surprised when I wasn't as affected by memories of Irene as he thought I would be but he understood better after I told him I had remembered her being the one that had purposely tried to push me into a deep depressive state that night I spoke with Tae, which she successfully did.

And she was successful because she discovered somehow my past (or what I thought were past) insecurities with my sexuality.

The reaction I had to an oncoming of memories that did surprise Yoongi as well as myself was when I remembered why I was thrown back into that insecurity... My talk with Namjoon about what happened with Jin.

Upon remembering that I got a massive headache. It was comparable to the one I had when Yoongi came to the hospital that night.

For some reason I didn't pass out immediately when it all hit me, but I wished I had. The pain was excruciating. I had to take one of the stronger medications that I didn't take often that made me sleep for extended periods of time and even after I woke up my head was humming.

Yoongi and I reasoned that it was because it wasn't just the talk I remembered but everything from meeting Jin, meeting Namjoon, kissing Jin, seeing Jin and Namjoon at the pier that day and then picking up Tae on our way to Seoul and seeing them both again.

I don't know why I remembered other things from my past and not my relationship with them. Maybe my subconscious blocked it because it was so painful. I'm not sure but holy hell, I wished I hadn't remembered.

It felt like being hit in the head and chest simultaneously by baseball bats with each instance that came to mind.

A bolt of pain would ricochet around my skull and the air knocked out of my lungs with each memory that hit. What was worse was that once it started it wouldn't stop. I was forced to endure it.

My thoughts had become rather foggy since the day that all happened and I found myself staring off into space in trancelike states for minutes at a time.

A few times it happened in middle of a conversation and I'd have to be snapped out of it by whoever was with me having to shake my shoulders to bring me back to reality.

Thankfully Doctor Yang was able to move my appointment with him up a few days and we were able to talk to him today.

Well, thankfully but also not because two rather unfortunate things were advised by Doctor Yang that were not what I wanted to hear at all.

The first was that I continue to be supervised which crushed my hope for independence, and the second was that I should continue to abstain from strenuous activity.

This was the worst of the two in my opinion because the two words have now become synonymous with anything sexual between Yoongi and myself.

These last few weeks have been quite frustrating for me to say the least. Lots of cold showers and jerking off.

Foggy thoughts and random trances haven't deterred my sex drive in the least. Yoongi has had just as difficult a time as me I think, but he hides it better than I do.

When we get into making out and our hands start to roam a little too extensively or it starts getting more rough, he stops us. I understand he is worried about giving me more headaches but he isn't considering the aching of my blue balls at all. It's torture.

Also during the visit the doctor had me do a few cognitive and brain activity tests. He said that the test results from my previous visit when Yoongi brought me to the emergency room weren't showing any irregularities, which Yoongi seemed to be annoyed by.

He later explained to me that he was hoping they would be able to see the medication I was given that the doctor did not prescribe, so they would possibly have an additional form of evidence of Irene's involvement in all of this.

He said he and Tae made a deal with the person that gave me the medicine that they wouldn't tell the doctor what they did if they told he and Yoongi who had contacted them with the bribe. They were told that the man didn't say his name, but he and Tae think it was Hyuk.

I tried to ask my mother about the man but she was not very forthcoming with information. My mother told me that she would tell me more as soon as she had more solid information but she said he had to do with the military. With this answer I had even more questions come to mind.

I tried to ask Tae as well but even he was hesitant and didn't end up answering directly. He just suggested I speak to my mother.

I have had a lot of things to think about, so for now I will try to let this one thing go and wait for her to have more information on the man. This isn't ideal of course, but I want to focus on remembering the good things that I'd forgotten. I want to remember how Yoongi and I started. How happy we were.

I want to remember how Yoongi and I started and how happy we were, not how sad we became.

What I don't want to do is stay home one more fucking day and be forced to do one of two things; think more about the unhappy things I've remembered or jerk off.

Yoongi mentioned yesterday that he may have to go into the actual company today as there is something that's come up that he wouldn't be able to do from the apartment.

When he said this I begged him to let me go in with him but he was not so keen to the idea. Tae is going to be out of the apartment with Seulgi today though so I can't be with him.

After Tae's place was off the table he was going to see if he could get ahold of Chanyeol but I told him not to bother him, to let him rest, and instead I called Jimin.

Jimin had the fantastic news that he would be at the company this afternoon after classes as he was using one of the dance studios to practice in for an upcoming performance piece he had to choreograph for class.

So I did end up getting my way and am bouncing impatiently in the passenger seat of Yoongi's car as we drive to the company so he can work and I can see Jimin.

Tae and I have spoken extensively about how busy Jimin has been with his schooling, the dance lessons he helps Hoseok with on the side and his spending time with Hoseok in general.

We have tried to hang out with the couple before but we can only take so much of the touchy two.

They don't care who is around, if Hoseok feels the need to stick his tongue down Jimin's throat he doesn't hesitate. Oh how Tae and I wish he would hesitate even just once.

We love the two, but we would really rather not see them going at each other while the four of us are sat on a couch trying to watch a movie.

But hey, at least Jimin and Hoseok don't have the same problem I'm having. All I want to do is get off and/or get Yoongi off and he rejects every fucking advance I make.

As soon as Yoongi gets the car parked I nearly sprint out of the concrete structure until I realize I have no idea where I would even find Jimin in the maze of hallways.

I'm sure there are at least half a dozen dance studios on each floor and I have no idea which he would be in. I am forced to wait impatiently as Yoongi moves even slower than normal (absolutely doing it on purpose) as I rock on my heels impatiently.

When he reaches me he takes my hand in his and leads the way to the appropriate studio, but I'm not paying much attention to the different hallways and rooms we pass.

I'm too focused on the physical contact happening with our hand holding. Even just holding his hand, his incredibly sexy and skilled hand, is torture.

I instinctively find myself wanting to be closer to him so as the walk has continued I have moved myself closer beside him so I am basically pressed against his side while still keeping hold of his hand as his thumb rubs circles on the back of my hand.

Yep. Torture.

Once at the room I peak through the window to see Jimin stretching in front of the mirror. He must not have arrived long before we did.

I take only a second to look through the closed door before I peel away from Yoongi, swing it open and run to where he's leaned into a stretch and throw myself into him.

We fall to the floor and are laughing loudly together until we hear Yoongi clear his throat from the door. We sit up and look in his direction, still wearing large smiles on our faces.

He looks at me. "I will get ahold of you when I am close to being done with what I have to do but it will be at least a few hours." He turns his attention to Jimin. "Is that okay? If you have to leave just let me know and I can see if he Tae might be done with Seulgi by then."

Jimin speaks up excitedly "Oh don't you worry we will have plenty to keep us busy. You may even be finished before we are ready to leave for the day" he says as he shoots a smile over to me.

I smile widely at him, so incredibly happy to not be sitting at home.

"Don't have too much fun and let me know if you need anything." Yoongi smiles at the two of us before he exits the room.

As soon as the door closes I throw my arms back around Jimin and thank him extensively for being my ticket out of the apartment.

I couldn't handle one more day in that fucking house of celibacy being alone with Yoongi because all I can think about when we're alone is how badly I want to touch him and want him to touch me.