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Why am I even doing this

I can't stand this anymore. It's obvious that no one here gives a shirt about me. I'm an annoyance and nothing else. I should just leave but I'm too attatched. I don't have the guts to even leave. I just obsess over the Great Comet all day long and people ignore me and don't even recognize my presence. And when I go back to school what will happen? I told my crush that I like them so now what will happen. And what of my friends? Will they be the same? And my closest friends talked about leaving some of the others behind and forming the Gay Anime Club. And my crush will be there. Will she still want to be my friend? And if I leave the others, will they tell others that I'm bi? They are known for not being good at keeping secrets. And tomorrow I have to go swimming with strangers while I barely have the confidence to go swimming with my family. And the Great Comet is closing. My solace is going to suffer. I can't stand it. It can't be. There's just too much stuff happening all at once. It's overwhelming. I can't breath. I can't calm down. It's just too much

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