3 months have passed since everyone has left him since the latest mission; Steve, Pepper, Clint, Natasha, Bruce, and even Rhodey are distancing themselves from him, telling him they are busy or need to be alone right now.With no other options or logic left to fill his mind day and night, Tony grabs a gun, a sweater, a flip phone that Steve gave him for missions, and a bottle of whiskey and heads down to the beach. He calls Steve and listens to the tone go off for roughly 10 seconds and hears a gruff hello. Tony doesn't respond and listens to the silence. "Tony, are you there?" Steve says as a response, wondering if it's a joke or if Tony is in a bad spot. "Yeah, I'm here." Tony replies tiredly, taking a sip of his whiskey. "Wow, it's been awhile, what have you been up to lately?" Steve says says with interest. "Yeah it has been awhile I guess, just trying to keep a low profile I guess." Tony says in a bored voice to his teammate swishing the contents of the bottle. "Yeah no kidding, Clint can barely find any news on you except this thing saying you went to the Bahamas with some chicks." Steve adds, trying to keep the conversation going. "Yeah I guess you could say that, but how has Clint been doing besides stalking around anyway?" Tony inquires laughing slightly at his own joke. "Good, great actually, besides the fact that Lila broke her finger, but it is healing pretty good." Steve adds. "Good, send her a get better soon balloon or something for me, would you?" Tony replies. Steve notices exhaustion dripping from Tony's voice with a hint of sadness, stirring up the soup of emotions. "Tony." Steve says with a pause "Yeah man?" Tony replies confused. "Are you really in the Bahamas partying with women? You haven't really been yourself after that last mission and I thought may" Tony cuts Steve off with a sharp intake of breath paired with a small no.

"Where are you really Tony, I don't want to hear some random place that you really aren't at too." Steve says sternly. "I really don't know, I-I tried everything you said Steve, I really did, but I couldn't do it, I cant do it anymore. Nothing has changed, yet everything is different at the same time you know." Tony sighs sounding defeated before he sips the amber liquid in the bottle. "Hey calm down and take a deep breath and tell me what the heck you are talking about. I can usually read people, but I can't read minds you know." Steve says trying to be comforting. "Recall the time when you found me in the lab running on caffeine and 3 hours of sleep from the previous two days?" Tony says in a monotone voice. "You told me not to destroy myself over this, I tried to listen, I really did, but I am just too tired to listen to orders and requests anymore. You know?"Tony says with a crack in his voice. You can hear him playing with the gun, clicking safety on and off. Steve really doesn't have a good feeling about this but he listens to Tony talk. "I'm sorry Steve, I really didn't want to hurt you, or anyone or anything for that matter" Tony answers with a slight pause to take a swig of whiskey feeling it burn down his throat. "I have killed so many people from my mistakes from not listening to your orders to having my company make weapons to destroy lives for longer than I have been alive, an I contributed to all the mass destruction in some way shape or form." Tony says in a dismal tone, struggling to keep from sobbing. "I'm sorry, I don't deserve any kind of love, I'm so, so very sorry for everything bad I have ever done." Tony replies sobbing quietly. "Tony where are you at, tell me right now." Steve says sternly, grabbing his keys and jacket. His only reply is heavy sobbing on the other end, and it broke his heart. "I'm coming to get you right now, I will get one of the AIs to track your phone if you don't tell me so see ya soon." Steve replies hurriedly. You can hear the motorcycle revving up in the background, along with him kicking the kickstand up. "I ju-just want-t it to-o end." Tony says stuttering and struggling to breath from a panic attack making it arrival known. "No! You are not going to die like this, you are a hero you're Ironman god damnit! You can't die in the middle of nowhere, and especially not like this!" Steve orders. You can hear the wind whistling as he rides his bike way above the speed limit, but he has places to be damnit! "I don't deserve anything." Tony states and ends the call taking a final swig of whiskey and setting the bottle down.