I slept in Joe's bed, and I hugged him as if he was going to disappear in that instant.
Joe was still by my side when I woke up the next morning... His little green eyes still closed, I brushed his hair away from his face so I could look at him more calmly. It wasn't the first time I'd noticed how cute he was, but I'd certainly never had him this close...
Slowly his eyes widened and he smiled widely at me.

-Hey... How did you sleep? Do you feel better? -I smiled and hugged him, I didn't need words with Joe, that was already proven, he could understand me with a look, and that was undoubtedly a point in his favor... Since I was never blessed with the gift of words .

Again, I asked Joe for some clothes, so I could take a shower before heading home.
Coming out of it, I put on the clothes he had left me, a huge T-Rex sweatshirt, and again a pair of jeans, several sizes larger than mine.

-You should think about wearing loose clothes... You look amazing... -I looked at Joe smiling, I loved receiving his words, I felt comfortable by his side.

-Hey... Since you've let me be with you these days, how about you let me buy you a drink tonight? I know a great place... -He accepted without thinking twice

-Of course! But only if that means that next time I invite you -we started a silly fight about who would pay or not, and I ended up in his arms laughing, while he tickled me to agree with him.
This was what I needed from the beginning... I felt so happy...
Joe and I went back into the studio together, Steve, Phil and Rick always used to have a great time together, while I was just leading the charge, not much in their moments. Now I spent idle hours laughing at the faces Joe made to see me laugh, or running away when we argued about football and he came to tickle me, to make me agree with him, or just listening to him sing... At last I felt complete.
Rehearsal went off without a hitch, Joe showed us something new he had written with Steve and no doubt all of us were completely blown away by the way it sounded.
The day was really productive, but I spent all of it thinking about how much I wished the night would come to have another moment with Joe alone... That thought killed me inside... I was not in love with Joseph, but with Dave, and none of this made sense. I settled down a bit, after all, we were just going to have a drink, like the good friends we were.
I went back to the shower (no, it's not an obsession, I just like the smell of the shampoo) this time I personally took care that all the sweet scent of lavender permeated my hair to the smallest strand, I made my curls With all my care, I tried to be as clean and scented as possible, I didn't know why I was trying so hard, Joe was supposed to be just a good friend, the best, but I was in love with Dave... I didn't give it more laps and kept getting ready.
I put on a black shirt, which I don't even bother buttoning up, it was a hot night after all, and then I'd have an excuse for Joe to lend me back his sweatshirt from that disgusting team he admires, but smells so good.
I put as many pendants around my neck as I could find and some fingerless gloves, which gave me a little air of a biker from the end of the seventies.
I put on a pair of jeans with ripped knees and again, I left the button unbuttoned, just for convenience, since the pants were already a little tight.
I put on my black sneakers and went out in the direction of the usual bar.

When they arrived, Joe was sitting there waiting, in a black T-shirt, leather jacket, skull belt, and more beautiful than ever.
I approached and he looked at me with a smile
-Savvy! I was waiting for you... You look... -he took a few seconds to check me from top to bottom- perfect... -I laughed a little
-You're great too Joe!
I bought him a drink, he opted for some Johnnie Walker whiskey with sweet Lemon tonic, and I for a glass of pink Gin and tonic, with some sour trinkets in it.
Joe checked me up and down whenever he could, perhaps thinking I couldn't see him. That didn't bother me, what's more, the fact that Joe couldn't take his eyes off me seemed so extremely attractive that I could have perfectly started behaving like a prostitute. But that was not what I had gone there with him, but to have a good time as friends...

-Joe... Do you have any opinion about gays? Relationships... Between men and stuff -he seemed surprised by the question, I really just wanted to make sure that there was no possibility of falling in love with him, fooling myself.

-eh... Well, it's hard to explain... I've never gone out with a man... Like... Formal relationship... But yes, I've slept with guys and, many of them are Better bedfellows than women so... I guess I'm all for that whole move...

Shit...that wasn't the answer I wanted...

-why the question? -he looked at me with his smile... Beautiful, as always...

-Oh well... Curiosity I suppose...

-And you? What do you think about it? I looked him in the eye and I thought very well about my answer.

-Eh well... About three years ago I discovered that I like boys... And... I think this is... My first coming out... Fairly decent and official -someone passed me an arm around his shoulders and I froze when I saw who it was...

-And I'm his boyfriend, Dave. Richard hadn't told me about any new friends. -Of course not, what was I going to talk to him about if we only saw each other for a couple of hours and the only thing he allowed me to let out through my mouth were some sounds of disgust when we had sex, since I knew that this was the only contact that was going to have with Dave until the next day, and so on.

-guess he hasn't found the moment yet... I just joined the band a few weeks ago... My name is Joseph, but I prefer Joe, He smiled broadly and my fear increased as Dave tightened his arm around my shoulders in a symbol of jealousy.

I have always hated marking, I am free, I do not belong to anyone. And Dave was definitely an expert at owning me. The times that we were in the bar no one could look at me, approach me or just talk to me in a friendly way, because that made Dave angry, and entailed a terrible consequence, for the poor bastard who made him angry, and for me.. .

-Well, Richard knows that his friends are my friends... Right Richard? -I was shaking, I didn't want to answer, and thank heaven, Joe came to my rescue
-I'm glad to hear that... He and I were going to have a few drinks, I don't think you want to stay, it's just work issues.