Spoiler for DSMP season 1 finale; Alternate Universe

"I am damaged... far too damaged," Tommy said softly, looking down at his scarred hands. He didn't need a mirror to know that his hair was a mess, the white streak a stark contrast with the oily faded blonde. His eyes would have been a dull gray. His clothes would have been torn, muddy, and bloody. He could feel the ache of every scar on his bottom, and his heart was heavy with the guilt for everyone he had ever lost, due to his own mistakes or some unresolved confusion along the way. Tommy hated admitting it out loud, but he was finally speaking the truth he told himself every night.

Tommy turned to his friend with a grim smile on his face, "But you're not beyond repair."

Tubbo also looked a mess. His shirt buttons were in the wrong spot, making one side of his shirt ride up and the other sag down. His pants used to be some color, but now they were gray with ash and brown with mud. His boots were falling apart at the seams. His brown hair was hanging around his guilty green eyes. One side of his face was covered in burn scars that still looked tender even though the accident had been almost two years ago. Tubbo was shivering where he stood.

But appearances didn't mean anything. Tubbo could clean himself up, and he would look like the innocent bee boy with lots of friends that Tommy knew he was. Tommy had messed up every relationship in his life. Nobody trusted him, cared about him, or even liked him. He had no one who would defend him or would try to become his friend again. Tubbo, on the other hand, had retained many of his past relationships. People cared about Tubbo. They would protect him, especially if they learned that Tubbo lost his platonic husband, child, and best friend. Tommy would get the cold shoulder, but people would listen to Tubbo. He wouldn't be alone when Tommy was gone.

"Stick around here. Make things... better," Tommy asked even though he knew it was nearly impossible. The Dream SMP would find peace, but nothing would ever be good. Tubbo could try his entire life, and he would never cure everyone's trauma. He would never be able to fully heal from his own trauma. But he could take steps to make things better, and that was one clear distinction Tommy wanted to make. Tubbo could help the others become kinder people. He could tell the stories of L'Manberg, Logstedshire, and so many other nations that were destroyed by the people it was made to protect. Tubbo couldn't heal existing trauma, but he might be able to prevent future problems. And who knows? Maybe Tubbo would find happiness with everyone now that Tommy wasn't there to hinder him and hold him back.

"Because you beat me fair and square," Tommy shrugged as he grabbed Tubbo's hand. He shook Tubbo's hand like they were making a deal. He didn't let go even when his arm sagged down. Tubbo had beat Tommy in so many ways. Tubbo was kind, fair, patient, and friendly. He didn't ruin everything he touched, and Tommy was extremely grateful that Tubbo had stuck around. Tubbo weathered Tommy's stormy personality, and Tommy was forever in Tubbo's debt. He didn't deserve a friend like Tubbo. No action he could ever take would make him worthy of Tubbo.

"Please stand back now," Tommy said, looking at the map of the SMP in Tubbo's laboratory. Tubbo pointed at a place close to the prison where he would stand when the nuke would land. Tommy shook his head with a bitter smile. He forcibly pushed Tubbo's hand to the side so he was far away from the prison. "Little further."

Tommy and Tubbo both turned around to stare at the nuke. It was an imposing piece of machinery. It seemed to shine in the dark room, the black metal reflecting back Tommy's watery smile and Tubbo's soft glare. Tommy placed his hand against the cold metal, touching his killer. "Don't know what this thing will do."

Tommy pressed his back against the nuke. A few tears slipped from his eyes as he saw Tubbo's eyes widen. He was finally realizing what Tommy was planning. His eyes darted over to the map, understanding dawning on his face. Tubbo threw a hand over his mouth as Tommy begged, "Hope you miss me. Wish you'd hug me."

Tommy took a step forward, grabbing Tubbo's hand. He pressed it against his forehead. A thousand memories ran through his head, every happy moment and unsaid word and regret and shared laughter and scar and camaraderie and love. They were best friends. It was a simple fact, one that could never change no matter what the world conspired to do. Not even death would be able to completely tear them apart, Tommy assured himself. "Then you know I worship you. I'll trade my life for yours."

"Oh my god," Tubbo replied. Tommy thought it was hilarious. Tubbo never believed in any of the gods. He wasn't like Tommy, who devoted himself to Prime. No, Tubbo was certain the gods couldn't exist because that would imply there were powerful entities that simply didn't care about the people that would throw their lives away for them. Tommy realized now that he probably clung to the idea of the gods because it made the cold nights less lonely to think that something was looking out for him. He couldn't count on anyone, especially not himself, to love him and keep him safe. He needed a god to do that.

"And once I disappear," Tommy said, pulling away from Tubbo. He refused to break down into sobs. He just kept a smile on his face as if this flimsy reassurance could make Tubbo feel better. Tommy was going to die tomorrow, and he would never come back from this one. There were no revival books or rituals. There were no back-up plans or alternate choices. There wasn't much time left, and they certainly didn't have allies or raw power. This was the only way.

"Wait, hold on!" Tubbo responded, grabbing both of Tommy's forearms. He could temporarily hold Tommy there, but they both knew that Tommy would find his way out of that bunker to hold off Dream and Punz.

"Clean up the mess down here!" Tommy asked once again. There would surely be a huge mess left in his wake. There would definitely be an environmental one in the bay where the Prison stood. He imagined that several people would be upset that Tommy, Punz, or Dream were gone. Tubbo would be the one that everyone would talk to. He would probably be forced to clean up the nuclear mess. Tommy hated to leave that for Tubbo, but at least the brunette wouldn't be in danger.

"Not this way!" Tubbo tried to argue, but it was pointless. There wasn't another way. It was this, or the server would be doomed to constant death and rebirth. Some people wouldn't even be brought back to ensure that some balance was maintained. They were the only ones that could save the server. It was time that they were finally the heroes everyone called them, even if it cost Tommy his life and Tubbo his best friend.

Our love is god

Tommy and Tubbo were attached to the hip even as children getting involved in a newborn country and dangerous war.

Our love is god

They stuck together even through Tubbo's wound, the Pit, Wilbur's betrayal, his death, and L'Manberg's destruction. Even through Exile, and the fight they had before Tommy's official return, couldn't truly break their friendship apart.

Our love is god

They fought Dream and imprisoned him. They found their way back to each other even after Tommy's revival. They joined forces to find out what happened to the hotel, and they came together to fight Dream a second time. They were going to L'Moonberg.

Our love is god

Now, Tommy stood in a dark obsidian room where Dream had been imprisoned and he had died. Dream and Punz were hurriedly trying to build towers up to help them escape the doomed prison, but Tommy remained rooted in place. He smiled even as tears slipped out of his eyes. The people he cared about flashed in his head. He was doing this for them. Tommy tilted his head upward, welcoming death more easily than he thought he would. He was doing this for Tubbo.

Tubbo stood far away, outside of the prison. He could see the nuke lowering down far away in the sky. Tubbo grabbed his chest with his hand, barely keeping the sobs from escaping him. Tubbo whispered, quietly, "Say hi to god."

The prison exploded with enough light to blind anyone who was unfortunate enough to look at it. The sound thundered across the land, reaching the highest mountain tops and the deepest parts of the ocean. Tubbo fell to his knees, letting out a scream as a dozen tears poured from his eyes like he had turned on a faucet to a sink. He pulled at his hair as the wind from the explosion managed to lash out around him even though he was extremely far away. When Tubbo finally looked up, the prison was gone. All that remained was a huge chasm that was quickly filling with water. Tubbo's entire body collapsed onto the ground. No one could have survived that, not Dream or Punz... not Tommy.

Several people from all across the Server, every surviving member, gathered together with hushed voices and wide eyes as they saw the prison. Sam looked like a freed man as he stared at it. Puffy rushed to Tubbo to help him back onto his feet. Niki approached his other side, placing a hand on Tubbo's shoulder. Jack whistled before his voice faded into a heavy sigh. Hannah grabbed Boomer's hand, squeezing it tight even though everyone knew the two of them were in an all-out war. Bad and Ant stood near the back of the crowd with narrowing eyes, and Skeppy gave the chasm a little attention. George nearly collapsed into SapNap's arms, and SapNap's face kept twitching like it wasn't sure what emotion it should be projecting. Callahan gaped at the chasm, and Conner stepped as close to the edge of the cliff Tubbo had been watching on as he dared. Eret stumbled back as soon as they saw the chasm, turning around. Eryn grabbed Eret's shoulder to help support them, but Eryn was hardly paying attention. Foolish had his hand out in front of him like he was searching the air, and his expression became more pained the longer his fingers were stretched. Fundy stood away from the group, holding his arms around his chest to protect himself. HBomb wandered towards Fundy, halfway there but too caught up with staring at the chasm to move any closer. Karl held a book close to his chest, looking disoriented and confused. Philza landed on the ground near the group, and Techno was probably hidden among the treeline. Ponk reached out to Sam before walking away, nearly hiding behind a wide-eyed Purpled. Quackity says nothing as he leans against a tree, and his attention is divided between looking at the chasm and looking through the crowd.

"You look like hell," Jack told Tubbo, the entire crowd quiet enough for everyone to hear it.

Tubbo glared at the chasm with as much anger as he could muster, but his hatred paled in comparison to his overwhelming sadness. "I just got back."