"Yeah, that sounds great, Haz, where are you thinking of going?" I asked, my phone sandwiched in between my shoulder and my cheek as I talked on the phone to Harrison, and wandered through the house. Tom looked up at me as I walked into the living room, the boy raising his eyebrows to question who I was talking to as I looked at him.

"Yeah, sounds like a plan. I'll suggest it to him, but I'll drag him out anyway, don't you worry." I teased, making Tom's eyes widen slightly as I hung up the phone and put it back into my pocket.

"What was that about, love?" He scoffed as I sat down next to him on the sofa.

"Haz has suggested a night out tonight, with us, him, and your brothers. Sound like a plan?" I asked.

"Sure, yeah. Where is he thinking of?" He asked.

"All of your old favourites." I shrugged before looking at him. His eyes wavered and he looked down, making my eyes waver too.

"Sorry...that hasn't come back yet, huh?" I sighed as I put my hand on his shoulder. He shook his head and gave me a small smile in response, making me gulp as he rested his hand on my thigh. Tom had returned from the dead six months ago now, and admittedly had made more progress than any of us had expected him to make. After the first month, he had remembered so little that we had all started to give up. But then after a few more weeks, things that we hadn't told him started to click for him. We had taken Tessa to see him again for the first time since he'd gone missing, and he hadn't needed to be told either her name, or that she was his for him to recognise her. He'd seen Jacob and Zendaya again for the first time after three months, and whilst he wasn't as close with them as he had been before the accident, he still knew who they were, and who they had been to him. All of it was progress, and now here we were, six months later, with genuine hope that he would regain full access to all of his memories by the end of the year. But...that still left us. Whilst Tom and I had undoubtedly continued to get closer in the last few months, we were still nowhere near the level of even dating, let alone being engaged. It was as if we were back to being two awkward teenagers who knew that they liked each other, but both were afraid to make the first move. I was too afraid to make the first move on Tom given that of course I no longer had any idea about where he was with me, and so didn't want to make him uncomfortable, and I was surely still somewhat of a stranger to him too. So, as much as I hated it, the longing stares and thigh touches, like what Tom was doing to me right now, had to be enough. Even if I wanted so much more. Even if I wanted him.

"No, but it's okay. Anyway, other, smaller stuff is still coming back. Like, I can now remember what your favourite flavour of ice cream is, it's salted caramel. I know that it's not much." He chuckled and nodded. I gave him a small smile and bit my lip, my heart warming up but also breaking at the same time at his words. The fact that he remembered such a small fact about me gave me hope that his true feelings for me were still in there, they just had to be uncovered. But my heart also broke because I knew that I couldn't lean in and kiss him like I would have done five years ago if he'd come out with such a meaningless and yet sweet fact about me. That was what hurt, and would never stop hurting. Not until he finally remembered, anyway.

Tom's P.O.V

Tom and Y/N walked into the club, his hand on her back so that he could still touch her, but not make her uncomfortable as the pair walked in. After all, he was falling for her more by the day just like he was sure that he'd done when they were teenagers, but she'd been through so much with his memory loss that he didn't want to accidentally force her back into the relationship with him.

"Mate, hey!" He turned around, a smile spreading onto his lips as Harrison and his twin brothers pushed through the crowd to get to them.

"Hey, you guys okay?" He smiled as he hugged all three boys tightly.

"Not too bad, excited to get pissed. Any of this ringing any bells?" Sam checked, all three of them looking at Tom with raised eyebrows. The boy sighed and looked around, the flashing lights, thumping music and cheap-smelling alcohol indicative of every club that he'd ever been to. He shook his head, making them all sigh and nod as Y/N's eyes wavered.

"That's okay, it's alright, there's no rush." Harrison reassured as he put his hand on Tom's shoulder.

"Boys, stay here. I have an idea." Y/N nodded, the girl looking at Tom with her absolutely gorgeous eyes once more before disappearing into the crowd. The four of them continued to talk and mingle, a drink being shoved into Tom's hand within seconds as he waited for the girl that he so desperately wanted back to return to the group. After a few moments, she pushed her way back through the crowd, Tom looking at her as a slow song started to play.

"Oh, nice one, Y/N." Harry scoffed, making Tom's eyebrows furrowed as Y/N smiled and bit her lip.

"Come on, Tommy. Let's dance." She nodded. He gulped and returned it, his heart fluttering in his chest as she gently took his hand and pulled him onto the dance-floor. She turned to face him, her beautiful eyes looking up at him as she curled her arms over his shoulders, and he raised his hands to hold her waist. They started to gently sway to the song, something about it being somewhat familiar. And then, it started to click.

Tom leant in and gently kissed Y/N, the girl returning it and both of them closing their eyes as she raised her hand to his cheek. She giggled cutely into it, making Tom smirk and deepen the kiss as they sat on his bed, and music softly played in the background.

"Wait, if we're about to have sex, we have to pick a better song, this can't be our song." Y/N mumbled and shook her head as she broke the kiss. The boy's eyebrows furrowed at her as she grabbed his phone and started to scroll through his playlist.

"What are you talking about, love?" He chuckled as he rested his hands on her thighs.

"Everyone knows that the song that you first have sex to becomes your song. And we need a good song." She smiled, making him return it and playfully roll his eyes at how fucking cute she was. She nodded and clicked on a new song, soft music playing through Tom's speaker as she put his phone down and looked back at him.

"There." She whispered.

"You happy now, sweetheart?" He smirked, making her giggle and nod as he leant in to kiss her again. Their lips moulded slowly together, the boy's heart unbelievably full of love for Y/N as he started to move forward and gently push her back onto his bed. They continued to make out, Tom's forearms on either side of her head holding his body up on top of her as she wrapped her legs around his waist, and they enjoyed the intimate moment.

Tom's eyes wavered, his heart leaping in his chest as the memory of his and Y/N's first time together came back to him. He remembered it like it was yesterday, it had been such a special day to him. One that he hadn't realised how much he loved until he hadn't been able to remember it. Y/N's eyes widened slightly as she looked at him.

"Tommy? Do you remember something?" She gulped. He returned it and looked at her, his heart pounding so harshly in his chest as he tried to decide whether or not to tell her. He still hadn't told anyone about the memories that had come back to him as dreams, they only knew about the memories that they had witnessed come back first-hand, like him recognising Tessa as soon as he'd seen her. And that was because to a certain extent, the memories that he was finding didn't feel like his own. He knew that they were his own, but it didn't feel like that. It felt like every one was him watching a movie, that he was a fraud for thinking that they were his moments to have. That kissing Y/N like that, being on top of her like that was his memory to relish, when it felt like it wasn't at all. And so, he wouldn't tell her. Not yet, anyway. Even if that still hurt to do, even after six months of getting memories back.

Y/N's P.O.V

Tom and I walked into the club, his hand on my back as we walked in. I wanted nothing more than for his hand to move down to my waist, or even my ass, but I didn't want to risk making him uncomfortable by suggesting that.

"Mate, hey!" Tom turned around, a smile spreading onto his lips as Harrison and his twin brothers pushed through the crowd to get to us.

"Hey, you guys okay?" Tom smiled as he hugged all three boys tightly, and I gave them small smiles.

"Not too bad, excited to get pissed. Any of this ringing any bells?" Sam checked, all three of them looking at Tom with raised eyebrows. I gulped and also looked at him, my heart leaping at the idea that maybe, just maybe, where we were would ring a bell. But apparently not. Tom sighed and looked around, but I could tell by his face that this was just another club to him. He shook his head, making them all sigh and nod as my eyes wavered.

"That's okay, it's alright, there's no rush." Harrison reassured as he put his hand on Tom's shoulder. Suddenly, I got an idea, making my eyes widen at the fact that if this didn't work, nothing would.

"Boys, stay here. I have an idea." I nodded, my eyes flicking to Tom once more before I disappeared into the crowd. I pushed my way through to the DJ's deck before using the Post-It notes that they had there for requests to write down mine and Tom's song. It was such a special moment for me that I hoped it would be for Tom too, and so maybe hearing this song would make him remember such a big event for us. I gave it to the DJ, making him nod as I headed away from the deck. I pushed my way back through the crowd, Tom looking at me as our song started to play.

"Oh, nice one, Y/N." Harry scoffed, making Tom's eyebrows furrow as I smiled and bit my lip.

"Come on, Tommy. Let's dance." I nodded. He gulped and returned it, my heart fluttering in my chest at the love that was in his gaze as I gently took his hand and pulled him onto the dance-floor. I turned to face him, his simply stunning eyes looking down at me as I curled my arms over his shoulders, and he raised his hands to hold my waist. We started to gently sway to the song, my eyes staying on Tom as I begged for any glimpse of recognition to strike across his face. Suddenly, something happened. Tom's eyes wavered, making my eyes widen slightly as I looked at him.

"Tommy? Do you remember something?" I gulped, my heart in my throat almost suffocating me as my mind pleaded, begged, for the song to have made a memory of us click. He continued to stare at me, his eyes becoming somewhat glassy as he clearly tried to process whatever he was thinking about. But then, just as quickly as it was given to me, all hope that I had was harshly snatched away again. Tom's eyes wavered once more as he shook his head, making me choke as I desperately tried not to show the fact that my heart had just shattered into a thousand pieces.

"That's okay. That's okay." I lied with a nod, a smile forcing itself onto my lips as I tried my hardest to reassure him. He sighed and returned the smile, tears starting to leave both of our eyes as I curled my hand around the back of his neck and gently pressed our foreheads together. We continued to sway together, every fibre in me just wanting all of this to end. All I wanted was to just wake up tomorrow and have Tom remember everything, have him remember why he had wanted to marry me. But I knew that now, that would likely never happen. And that only hurt more every single day that he failed to remember me. Failed to remember us.

"So, did you have fun?" I asked, my feet immediately kicking my heels off as I let Tom and I into our house.

"Yeah, it was really nice. I can see why that place used to be my favourite." He chuckled slightly. I smiled and bit my lip as I looked at him.

"You want one more drink before we turn in for the night?" I asked.

"Sure, um..." He sighed and looked down, his eyes squeezing shut as he scratched his hair in annoyance.

"I don't suppose you remember what my favourite drink is?" He chuckled in defeat as he looked back up at me. I sighed and gave him a reassuring smile, though my heart broke for the umpteenth time tonight at seeing Tom so broken himself.

"I've got you, Tommy." I reassured, making him give me a small smile as he sat down on the sofa, and I headed through to the kitchen. I took deep breaths, my head still slightly fuzzy from the alcohol as I poured myself a vodka and coke before making Tom a glass of his favourite whiskey. Not that he'd know that, but that didn't matter. I grabbed both and headed back through, my fiance giving me a small smile as I handed him the glass.

"Ooh, whiskey." He smiled, making me chuckle and shake my head as I sat down next to him, and he took a sip. I took a sip of my drink too, a more comfortable than normal silence taking over the room as Tom put his arm around me. He sighed and looked at me.

"Love, um...can I tell you something?" He asked quietly, making me look at him.

"Course you can, Tommy. Anything." I reassured with a shake of my head. He gulped and sat up to properly face me, making my eyebrows furrow in concern at what he was about to say. What could he possibly need to tell me that was making him look this fucking petrified?

"I-I, um...tonight, I lied. When we started dancing to that song, I lied when I said that nothing came back to me. I-I remembered something, I remembered that it was our song, because we had sex for the first time to it. I remembered." He admitted as he timidly looked at me. My eyes widened, a choke leaving my lips at his words. Within seconds, I felt completely weightless, an injection of hope starting to course through me at the fact that he had remembered something. And he'd remembered something about us, too.

"Tommy, that's...that's amazing, oh my god." I choked and shook my head as I raised my hand to hold his cheek.

"That's not all, darling. I, um...fuck, I've been remembering things in my sleep since a month after I came back. I remembered the proposal, I remembered things with Harrison and my brothers, I remembered memories with my parents. I've been remembering stuff since a month after I came back." He carried on. That was when the paradise once again ended. My eyes wavered again, my gaze flicking over his face and desperately looking for any sign that he was lying as I pulled away slightly from him.

"You...what? You've been remembering...this whole time?" I whispered and shook my head.

"Nothing massive, sweetheart, there are still a lot of gaps in my memories-."

"Tom, I'd say that remembering your proposal to me is pretty big." I scoffed as I narrowed my eyes at him.

"This is why I didn't tell you, because yes, they're big to you guys, but they're not to me. They don't feel like me." He spat slightly as he looked at me. My eyes wavered again, a tear running down my face at his words.

"What do you mean, Tommy?" I whispered. He sighed and looked down, the boy pinching the bridge of his nose as he refused to look at me.

"I'm sorry for snapping, I shouldn't have snapped. But my memories, they don't feel like mine. I know that they are, but they feel like I'm watching a movie, o-or like I'm watching someone else's life. There's no emotion to them, not like there should be when you're recalling an important memory. I didn't feel love and affection when starting to get back memories of my parents, of my brothers and Harrison, I...I didn't feel love and affection when I remembered the night that I proposed." He choked quietly. I nodded and bit my lip, my entire body feeling numb at what he was saying as tears silently streamed down my face. There always had to be a condition. Tom had remembered things, including the most important night of our lives...but still couldn't remember the emotions that came with that. And without the emotion, those memories were nothing.

"I'm sorry, Tommy. It must be really scary to remember things, but feel like they're not your memories." I whispered as I cupped his cheek again and gently pressed our foreheads together. He sighed and nodded, his hand raising to gently hold my wrist as we just held each other.

"It is. But it's okay, because I'm getting there. I remember stuff, that was step one, step two is remembering the emotion that comes with those memories. I can do it, sweetheart, I promise." He cried and shook his head.

"I know that you can, I know. And we're all here to help with that." I promised, making him choke and nod again as his eyes fluttered shut. I bit my lip harshly and tried to hold it together for Tom, the fact that he could remember stuff but couldn't remember the emotions clearly having impacted him more than I'd ever realise. That was something that we needed to start looking into. But now wasn't the time. And so for tonight, I'd part my lips once more to say the final thing that I always ended our conversations on now.

"Remember me. Please."