This is the last chapter of any of my stories that I'll be updating for the next 2 months!

I do not want to be held accountable on the Day of Judgement for people reading my story instead of spending time worshipping Allah by reading qur'an performing dhikr, praying salah, memorizing surah's.....especially in Ramadan. So, I'm taking this opportunity to warn you lot yet again for the sake of Allah.

Delete Wattpad.

Focus on you and your religion during Ramadan.

Go check my latest chapter on my story 'Your Hijab Story' where I posted a chapter titled 'Ramadan Preparations' where I gave guidelines/tips in order for you to InshaaAllah use you Ramadan wisely and spend the month in worship!
So go check that out :)

Enjoy the chapter :) xxx

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He looked deep into my eyes, my heart pounding in my chest as I finally, after five years got the answer to the only important question I had ever wanted to ask him. Why?

He spoke. "I had cancer."

My heart plummeted. I looked at him, not knowing whether or not to believe him but as always, his eyes didn't leave me another option other than to believe him.

"W-what?" I stuttered softly, my eyes falling to my lap as I tried to take in and absorb the new information.

He cursed to himself, turning his body away from me and leaning his forehead on the steering wheel, his hands clenching around the sides of it as he exhaled.

He took a deep breath and lifted his head off the steering wheel, facing out the window. "A month before I left you, I fainted at work then at my mums house. I woke up in the hospital and found out I had cancer. Leukaemia. My bone marrow was 97% cancerous. They said I didn't have much time to live because it was discovered so late. They said one to three months, if I was lucky." He took a deep breath in and out before turning to me. "I didn't care though. I wasn't worried for myself." He told me.

"You went to the doctors and all the tests without me!?" I stammered in shock. How could he keep something like that from me?

"I had to." He said sadly. "The only thing that came into my mind when he told me was you, Sumayya. Wallah I didn't even care about myself or the fact that I was dying. I knew that it would kill you once I died and so I did the next best thing. I left." He shrugged, running a hand through his hair in frustration as he looked for the right words to explain his thought process to me. "I figured that if I died, you wouldn't be able to move on with your life and you would grieve my loss."

"And you thought I wouldn't if you just left!?" I yelled, understanding his reasoning, tears running down my eyes.

"I thought that if I left you would eventually end up hating me for leaving you and then you'd eventually move on, okay!?" He yelled back. "As much as the thought killed me, I thought that if I left, you'd hate me and then..." He took a deep breath. "Then you'd get married to someone else and be happy." He sighed.

"What happened to the cancer?" I asked him.

"I didn't die, clearly. The cancer spread slowly for a whole year. I had daily regimen of chemotherapy and blood and platelet transfusions. I lost 30 kilos in five months, lost all my hair. I was waiting on death to come, but by the will of Allah, it never did. Two years later everything started getting better. They found a suitable bone marrow donor and the cancer was gone around this time last year." He looked at me, his eyes scanning over my features as he watched my every move.

"I did..."

I cut him off. "Why wait a year? Why didn't you come back last year?" I asked him.

He sighed. "Because they said that even if it was minor, there was a chance of it coming back and I didn't want you to see me while I was in that state. I was weak, skinny, bald and I looked sick."

"What if I was married?" I said after another few minutes of silence.

"I probably would have left."

"Where are your parents?" I asked him.

"They were with me in Canada for the four years. They're back here now."

"Didn't they tell you not to leave me?" I spoke softly. "Not even Halima or Kubra?" Truth was, I was offended. Halima and Kubra, Zaid's sisters were like my own sisters. I loved them to death and I thought they loved me too. Same with his parents.

"I didn't listen to them. Forced them to stop talking about you for my sake. They all miss you."

"What about your aunts and uncles?" I remember trying to call everyone, only every single phone was disconnected.

"We moved them all to new houses. New phones..." He trailed off. (A/N: omg I'm cringing so hard hahahahahah this is so unrealistic and stupid, mans couldn't think of anything LOOOOOL bye x)

I released a chuckle but it was far from being one filled with humour. "Just so I couldn't find you. Wow. That's how bad you wanted to get rid of me, huh?" I scoffed with a shake of my head.

"No, never." He said quickly. "I never wanted to get rid of you." He muttered truthfully. "It was just so you could hate me, not grieve my loss and move on."

The car fell into yet another silence and I rubbed my forehead, drying my cheeks with my hijab before exhaling.

"I should get going now." I said with a sigh as I pulled the door handle once more, remembering it was locked. "Can you unlock the door?"

He narrowed his eyes at me, his mouth falling agape. "What? That's it?! You don't forgive me?" He asked.

Was he serious?

Did he actually think that I was just going to forgive him like that after four years and we could go back to living happily ever after?!

"Is there anything else you want to tell me?" I asked him. He didn't answer. "Well then that's it. I forgive you, whatever. I told you I forgave you before as well."

I paused and something came into my mind. That girl. Who was she?

"You've clearly moved on anyway." I said with a shrug, hoping he would open the conversation and tell me who the hell she was.

Not that I cared really.

"Sumayya, stop being stupid!" He screamed, making me jump slightly as he slammed his hand against the steering wheel. "You think I've moved on?! Why would I be back if I've moved on!?" He yelled.

"Who was she then!?" I yelled back before taking a deep breath, cursing myself for making it seem like it affected me. It did affect me.

"Who!?" He shouted, with wide eyes before he sighed and recognition flooded his eyes. "Oh, Aminah." He said. "Her mum breastfed me."

"You're lying." I spoke. "You said you didn't have any siblings like that to me." I said, shaking my head. Aminah. So that was her name.

"I didn't know of her. She's younger than us. Her family live in Lebanon but she came here to study. She's been living with us for two years."

So he hadn't moved on?

Like he said, why would he come after me if he had moved on anyway?

"Okay." I said simply and turned trying to open the locked door again.

"Sumayya!" He shouted again, narrowing his eyes at me.

"What!?" I shouted, narrowing my eyes back. "What do you want from me!? I forgive you! Okay?! I. Forgive. You."

"What do you mean, what do I want? I want my kids! I want you! I want to be a family!" He shouted making me widen my eyes in shock.

"Zaid, stop being stupid." I muttered with a smile that, once again, had no humour behind it whatsoever. "The kids are mine. Neither of them want to see you and even if they did, or even if I let them see you, a family is not going to happen. They're my kids, you're their father. That's it." I scoffed. "I don't know where you got the idea of family from, but that will never happen."

He stared at me for a whole minute before taking my hands in his larger ones.

I sighed, not being able to stop myself and not finding the strength to pull away as he ran his thumbs over the backs of my hand. The soft gesture made my stomach do flips and I swallowed. "Sumi, I love you. Please, don't say that. The only thing that got me through all those years was the thought of returning and starting a family with you again. Please, don't do this to me. I need you."

I looked down at our joined hands, feeling tears gather in my eyes.

I swallowed the growing lump in my throat and shook my head, pulling my hands out of his grasp. "I'm sorry." I said softly.

"Please, just unlock the door and let me go."

He stayed silent again, running his hands through his hair in frustration before clenching his jaw as he turned the car on and reversed out of the carpark.

I put my seatbelt back on as I realised he was driving back to the restaurant. The time was four thirty and I was sure the kids were making a big deal about me not being home yet as my phone hadn't stopped vibrating for about ten minutes.

We arrived at the restaurant.

"They're twins?" He asked me as he unlocked the doors. I had a leg out of the car but stopped my movements.

Clearing my throat, I remembered what my mum had told me. Islamically, he had a right to know.

"Yes." I replied simply.

"What are their names?" He asked, looking at me with tears in his eyes.

I exhaled and started to get out of the car but he held my hand, stopping me and as I turned back to look at him, I realised the pleading look in his eyes.

"Hamza and Hafsa." I sighed and a sad but still happy smile took over his features as he released a sound that sounded something between a sob and a laugh. "A girl too?" He whispered, saying the names mainly to himself as his eyes had drifted away from my face.

"Goodbye, Zaid." I said, shutting the door behind me but he rolled down the window and spoke again, making me tense. 

"By Allah, I am not going anywhere until we are a family, Sumayya." He said, simply before reversing out of the car park and leaving me alone with my thoughts.

:::::

"Sounds legit." Justin said simply.

I looked at him, my mouth agape. "That's all you have to say?" I asked him.

I had arrived home soon after Zaid left and just like I had assumed, the kids had gone crazy, crying non-stop for me and not letting me put them down properly for even a second and so after putting them to sleep, I had come downstairs, explaining the situation to my dad and Justin.

Justin had also apologised over and over for what he had done and I forgave him without dragging it along.

Forgive people so that Allah will forgive you, innit.

In the end what he did wasn't intentional, but I guess he knew now to be more careful when speaking about things like that. Jessica had yelled at me when I arrived because I was 'wasting time on things that don't matter and making the poor babies cry' and that I need to 'grow up already and check my priorities'.

It was weird how Jessica hated me for some odd reason, but was literally in love with my kids.

She had them as her wallpaper, had a photo of them on her bedside table and she spent her whole day playing with them and making them laugh while I was gone without so much as a single complaint.

Alhamdulillah.

"I can see it in your eyes that you've already forgiven him. What do you want me to say?" He asked with a shrug.

I sighed, exasperated. "I don't know? What you think I should do?"

"Like your mother said to you, habibti. Do what you feel is right for your children." My dad said.

"Yeah, and I need help figuring out exactly what that is!" I said, looking at the both of them.

My dad sighed. "I don't want to admit it, but if what he's saying is true, then I think he deserves a chance to meet the kids and to build a relationship with them."

Justin bopped his head up and down slightly, showing his agreement with my dad as I leaned forward slightly and cleared my throat.

"What about..." I coughed, scratching my arm even though it wasn't even itchy. "What about me?" I asked quietly.

"No way!" Justin replied at the same time my dad said 'see how he goes with the kids.'

They both looked at each other with narrowed eyes making me smile slightly despite my mood.

"Abdullah!" Justin said.

"Listen, he's the father to her kids. If there's anyone I would want her to be a family with, it would be with him."

"He. Left. Her." Justin spoke through his teeth, pronouncing each word separately.

"For obvious reasons, clearly." My dad said.

Justin stayed silent and Hamza's cry broke it. I quickly got up in hopes of him not waking up Hafsa but by the time I had ran and made it to the room, she was also up crying.

I sighed and locked the door, changing into my sleepwear quickly before lying down beside them and kissing them both as they snuggled into my sides, relaxing. "Shh, it's okay. I'm here. Go back to sleep."

After a few minutes they were back in a deep slumber, their little arms over my stomach.

For me?

Another sleepless night.

:::::

There we have it! I'm so nice I didn't want to leave you guys on another cliffhanger haha!

DON'T FORGET! Go check out my Ramadan preparations chapter on 'Your Hijab Story'

As salamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu. ❤