AN: Todays trauma is brought to you by... me :)
But before you come after me, I cried while writing this chapter...

~~

"There is not a righteous man on earth who does what is right and never sins."

Ecclesiastes: 7:20.

"You know, they do have hotels in Georgia," Garcia commented.

The technical analyst got out of the car with Hotch and looked around with an uncharacteristically judgmental look.

"If we're going to figure out where Tobias Hankel's taken Reid, the answer is in this house. There's no sense splitting time between here and a field office," said Hotch.

"Right."

"Think of the house as a witness. If it could talk, what would it tell us?"

"My guess is it'd tell us to get the hell out."

She entered the messy house and met the rest of the team.

Emily, JJ and Gideon were currently going through the many notebooks that Tobias had written for what seemed like years.

"Welcome to our nightmare," greeted JJ Garcia.

"His computer's an extension of his brain. I need you to dissect it," Gideon instructed her.

"I'll get you set up. Come on."

Derek led Garcia into the next room, where several screens were set up.

"So, nothing new since I left?" asked Hotch.

He looked at Parker, who was standing at the window, staring out as if Spencer would magically appear outside the window at any moment.

"They haven't said a word since you left," Gideon explained. "And they refuse to leave too."

"Who can blame them?"

The profilers were silent for a moment and then returned their attention to the notebooks.

"Well, the good thing is the guy documented practically every second of his life. Bad news is we're still unpiling," Emily reported.

"From the looks of it, he hasn't left this place in years," Parker said as they finally turned away from the window.

"He knew he could pretend to be looking for a motel and throw us off his trail."

"No, no, no. It's more than that. The sheriff's office, 911 calls, every time he engages the police, he gets away with it, reassures himself God's on his side, not ours."

~~

"There has to be something in here," Parker whispered.

They sat with Garcia and still looked through the notebooks.

"We'll find him," Garcia tried to reassure herself. "Hey, which one of you is planning your anniversary this year?"

"Me", said the young profiler, grateful that Garcia changed the subject to something more positiv.

"So? Any idea yet?"

"No, not yet," they answered the question. "But I–"

"Parker?" Emily appered at the door.

"JJ and I are talking to some guy who knew Hankel from Narcotics Anonymous Tomorrow morning. You can come with us if you want. You know, get out of the house."

"Oh, okay."

"Okay. Great. Then–"

"Hey, guys, I think I got something," Morgan called from outside.

He found the entrance to a storm cellar.

Inside, blocks of ice were piled up. The body of Charles Hankel was sitting on one.

~~

"Tobias Hankel. I haven't thought about that boy in probably 10 years," the man explained to Emily, JJ and Parker.

"So, you two were in a program together?"

"He should tell you, but, yeah, I was his sponsor. Small town, we all get lumped together. Me, I was just a drunk, but Tobias, he was a whole different sort of animal."

"What– what was Tobias' drug of choice?" Parker asked.

"Dilaudid."

"Drug store heroin."

"He used to cut it with a psychedelic. That boy was looking to escape as far from reality as he could get. Addicts don't get excuses. But if someone ever needed to self-medicate, it was that boy."

"Why's that?"

"You know anything about his daddy?"

"We think Tobias Hankel may have murdered his father."

And abducted my boyfriend, Parker thought.

"Good for him," he said surprisingly. "You know, Tobias's mom ran off with another man when he was seven. His dad went section eight. Started preaching about sin. End of the world stuff. He beat Tobias silly. He burned a cross in his forehead when Tobias was 10. If Tobias wore a hat, he'd beat him more."

"Is there anyone Tobias would turn to if he was on the run?"

"Far as I know, he never left home. You know, honestly, between his habit and the old man, I'm amazed he's still alive."

~~

"Any luck with the rehab contact?" Gideon wanted to know when Parker and the others were back.

"Well, he has no idea where Hankel might be, but we did learn that he has a serious drug problem. Dilaudid," Emily reported.

"Well, that could explain the psychotic fracture."

"What are you talking about?"

"Tobias is living as at least three different people. Himself, Raphael and his father."

"Well, this could be some bad news," the sheriff entered the room. "A computer store was robbed in the middle of the night. A suburb outside of Atlanta. Thief got away with four laptops, external hard drives and a satellite."

"If it's Tobias, it puts him right back in business."

"Guys! Guys, get in here!" shouted Derek.

Parker and the others stood next to Derek and Garcia.

And Parker wished they had stayed in the other room.

Spencer was now visible on the screens. He was tied to a chair and he looked pretty badly hurt.

Parker held on to the doorframe and put one hand onto their chest.

"He's been beaten."

"Can't you track him?" asked JJ.

"Hankel's only streaming this to his home computer."

"This is for us. He knows we're here."

Parker was paralyzed. They didn't know what they could do now.

They had to find Spencer before it was too late.

"I'm going to put this guy's head on a stick," Derek muttered.

"Why can't you locate him?"

"He's rerouting to a different IP address every 30 seconds. I can't track him."

~~

"You really see inside men's minds?" Hankel asked Spencer.

Spencer looked silently at the other man.

"See these vermin?"

Hankel pointed to the three screens, each showing a different room.

"Choose one to die. I'll let you choose one to live."

"No."

"I thought you wanted to be some kind of savior."

"You're a sadist in a psychotic break. You won't stop killing. Your word is not true," Spencer replied.

Hankel stood next to the camera he had set up.

"The other Heathens are watching–," said Hankel.

"Choose a sinner to die, and I'll say the name and address of the person to be saved."

"I won't choose who gets slaughtered and have you leave their remains behind like a poacher," Spencer denied and looked directly into the camera for a moment.

"You really see into my mind, boy? Can you see I'm not a liar?" Hankel wanted to know and approached Spencer.

Please, don't let Parker watch this, Spencer thought as Hankel grabbed him and forced him to sit up.

"– Choose one to die, save a life. Otherwise, they're all dead."

Hankel let go of the younger man and stepped back.

"All right, I'll choose who lives."

"All the same."

"Far... Far right screen."

~~

"Marilyn David. 4913 Walnut Creek Road."

"You got that?" Hotch wanted to know from Garcia.

"Yeah."

Gideon grabbed his cell phone to call the woman.

He was dialing the number when the screens went black again.

"What?" Parker muttered nervously.

What just happened? Will Hankel hurt Spencer again?

"Parker–"

The young agent hadn't noticed Hotch standing next to them.

"Let's get some fresh air."

He led Parker onto the porch. Where Parker allowed themselves to take some deep breaths.

The young adult didn't even notice that they had been holding their breath.

After a few moments, Gideon also joined them.

"He looked so..." Parker muttered, but he couldn't think of a word to describe it.

"He is alive," said Gideon.

"What if that wasn't live?" they replied. "Or if he killed him after the camera went off? Or–"

"Parker, he is still alive," Gideon repeated.

Parker nodded. They had to believe Gideon. They just had to believe that Spencer was still alive.

"I really hope so. Because I don't know what I would do if he isn't," said Parker and went back into the house.

~~

The Profilers didn't have to wait long before a new emergency call came in. And even if they had waited, they were too late.

"Slaughtered. Same as the others," declared the sheriff. "I've got roadblocks for a 15-mile radius. Every unit's on the road, but so far, nothing."

"I don't know how much longer Reid can hold out."

"Who were the victims?"

"Pam and Mike Hayes. He was a local defense attorney."

"What Bible passage was left?"

"Isaiah 59," said the sheriff and handed Hotch the paper.

"'No one calls for justice. No one pleads their case with integrity. They rely on empty arguments, they offer lies, they conceive trouble and give birth to evil.'" the profiler read.

Gideon's gaze fell on the laptop camera.

"Parker, talk to him," the older profiler said to them.

"Who do you want to talk to?" Parker wanted to know.

Gideon pointed to the laptop and Parker understood what he meant. Even if he might not even see it.

They sat at the desk and simply spoke into the camera.

"Spence, I don't know if you're seeing this, but you're not responsible for this. You understand me? That guy is perverting God to justify murder. You are stronger than him, you know that. He cannot break you. Please... I love you. I– we need you back."

~~

"We're not getting any closer," Hotch said.

They were back at the house and dropped Parker off directly by Garcia, so they weren't alone.

"Reid's brilliant. He'll figure out how to survive."

"You know, I always take advantage of Reid for his brain, but I never actually teach him or Parker how to deal with things emotionally," Hotch admitted.

He could see what kind of impact that had on Parker. They needed to focus, but most of the time their emotions got in their way.

Just like, when they wanted to shot Dowd.

"You lead by example."

"And what kind of example is that?"

"He'll make it."

~~

"I don't understand. Why can't we shut it down?" Gideon wanted to know.

Hankel already uploaded the last murder like the others.

"Because I can't pinpoint his IP address."

"Just remove it once he sends it."

"It's the Internet, sir. Once something's out there, you can never take it back."

"The entire history of man, you can't undo anything," complained Gideon.

"Can you please do something? Anything. I don't want him thinking he has a pulpit."

"I have a list of everyone from the file-sharing chain. I could send out a mass warning that the video is actually a virus. I'm going to do that. Okay."

"Good. Do it. Do it."

~~

Of course, Hankel didn't like that at all.

"No. No! They're trying to silence my message," he got upset.

"I can't control what they do. I'm not with them. I'm with you."

"Really?" replied Hankel.

He tapped the keyboard and Parker's video message appeared on one the screens.

"Spence, I don't know if you're seeing this, but you're not responsible for this. You understand me? That guy is perverting God to justify murder. You are stronger than him, you know that. He cannot break you. Please... I love you. I– we need you back."

It was very difficult for Spencer to keep a neutral expression.

This was exactly what he needed to keep going... and get out of this situation.

And if not– if he was to die here, then at least he did see them again... heard their voice... one last time.

"You think you can defend me?", Hankel tore the young man out of his thoughts.

"I don't know what they're talking about."

"You're a liar," Hankel objected.

He noticed the needle marks on Spencer's arm.

"You're pitiful. Just like my son."

Hankel stepped to the camera and activated it a second time.

"This ends now."

Hankel walked away from the camera and stooped right in front of Spencer.

And one last time, Spencer hoped that the team wouldn't let Parker see this– because he knew that this was going to be bad.

"– Confess your sins."

He then punched Spencer in the face.

"Confess."

"I haven't done anything."

Hankel hit Spencer again.

"Tobias, help me."

"He can't help you. He's weak. Confess!"

"Tobias," Spencer tried again.

Hankel's response was another hit.

Then he stepped around Spencer.

"Confess your sins."

"No."

Hankel knocked over the chair and Spencer landed backwards on the floor.

He tried to gasp for air, but it wouldn't work.

He tried and tried and tried...

Until he stopped moving at all.

~~

"No. No... NO! Spence! NO!"

"Get Parker out of here. Now."

Someone from the team put their arms around them and brought Parker into the hallway.

Well, Derek tried, but despite Parker being smaller, they had quite a bit of strength.

"No! Let me go!"

Derek managed to get the younger profiler into the hallway.

"No, no, no..." Parker repeated quietly.

Derek let go of them and Parker stumbled to the wall and held on to it.

They collapsed and buried their faces between their knees.

"This can't be true," Parker muttered quietly to themself. "He is not dead. He's just... just sleepy, yes. He must be very tired. I mean, who wouldn't be in his situation..."

"Guys," Hotch called his colleagues.

Derek couldn't react at all before Parker already stormed past him.

Something Parker didn't expect was that Hankel was trying to help Spencer.

And it worked.

Parker breathed out in relief and a huge stone fell from their heart.

"Wait. Wait a second. When was the video of the last murder posted?" Emily asked.

"9:23."

"And what was the time of death?"

"The 911 call came in at 9:04, and the murder must have occurred moments later."

"That's only a 19-minute difference."

"How long would it take to post the MPEG?"

"Two, three minutes."

"Well, let's call it two."

"You figure a maximum of 60 miles an hour in a residential area. That means Hankel has to be within a 17-mile radius of the crime scene."

"Garcia, can we see it on a map?"

"Yeah."

"Call Farraday. I want that area locked down like it's martial law."

JJ was already reaching for her phone, but Garcia stopped her and brought the team's attention back to the screens.

"Guys."

"You came back to life," said Hankel.

"Raphael."

"There can only be one of two reasons."

"I was given CPR," Spencer explained.

"There are no accidents. How many members are on your team?"

"Seven."

"But we are eight," Parker muttered.

The young adult was too upset to notice that Spencer had intentionally answered incorrectly.

"The seven angels who had the seven trumpets prepared themselves to sound. The first sounded and there followed hail and fire mixed with blood and they were thrown to Earth," Hankel quoted from the Bible.

"He thinks it's Revelation. The seven archangels versus the seven angels of death."

"Tell me who you serve," he asked the young genius.

"I serve you."

"Then choose one to die."

"What?"

~~

"Your team members. Choose one to die."

"Kill me."

"You said you weren't one of them."

"I lied."

"Your team has six other members. Tell me who this is."

"No."

Hankel picked up the revolver on his coat, turned the revolver's cylinder and aimed it at Spencer.

"Choose and prove you'll do God's will."

"No," Spencer refused and continued to look Hankel in the eyes.

Hankel pulled the trigger, but nothing happened– no bullet.

"Choose."

"I won't do it."

Hankel pulled the trigger a second time, again no bullet.

"Life is a choice."

"No."

Parker was sure that the clicking wouldn't haunt them in their nightmares.

"Choose."

"I choose Aaron Hotchner," Spencer said after thinking for a moment. "He's a classic narcissist. He thinks he's better than everyone else on the team. Genesis 23:4. 'Let him not deceive himself and trust in emptiness, vanity, falseness and futility, for these shall be his recompense'."

Hankel raised the gun and fired into the air and this time it wouldn't have ended well.

Hankel then put another cartridge into the barrel of the revolver.

"For God's sake."

~~

"I'm not a narcissist," Hotch assured as the others followed him into the living room.

"Come on. Look, you can't take anything from that. He's not in his right mind, Hotch–"

"That's not what I'm saying. All right, everybody, right now. What's my worst quality?... Okay, I'll start. I have no sense of humor."

"You're a bully," JJ listed.

"I'm a bully."

"You can be a drill sergeant, sometimes."

"Right."

"You don't trust women as much as men."

"Okay, good. I'm all these things, but none of you said that I ever put myself above the team, because I don't, ever. Reid and I discussed the definition of classic narcissism, and he knew that I would remember that. And he also quoted Genesis 23:4."

Hotch handed Parker the Bible and they read the passage: "I am a stranger and a sojourner with you, give me property for a burial place among you that I may bury my dead out of my sight."

"He wouldn't get it wrong unless it was on purpose."

"He's in a cemetery."

~~

"I don't see a cemetery," said Emily.

She and the others looked at the map again.

"Call up the first time we saw Reid."

Garcia started the recording and zoomed in on Spencer a little.

"I won't choose who gets slaughtered and have you leave their remains behind like a poacher."

Now they noticed that the young profiler was looking directly into the camera.

"Check to see if there are any reports of poaching in the last couple of days."

"Okay. A farmer reported two sheep being slaughtered on his property."

"Where are we talking?"

"What's that patch of green there?"

"Marshall Parish. I think it's an old plantation."

"Wait. Tobias wrote in his journals about 'staying clean' and 'keeping away from Marshall'."

"Guys. There's a cemetery on the grounds."

~~

While the others searched the old wooden house in the cemetery, Parker looked around outside.

"Dig faster," Parker heard Hankel's voice.

They turned off the flashlight and moved closer to the two men. To avoid being discovered, the young agent stayed in the shadow of the trees.

Spencer and Hankel stood a few steps apart. Spencer had a shovel in his hand and was digging a hole in the ground with it and Hankel was watching him.

"I'm not strong enough," Spencer muttered meekly.

Parker felt a surge of anger as the young agent realized that Spencer was digging his own grave.

They saw red.

"You're all weak," said Hankel.

The man took off his coat and stepped closer to Spencer.

"Get out of there."

"Hankel!" Parker now drew attention to them.

The man turned around.

Parker pulled the trigger.

Hankel collapsed to the ground and now Spencer turned around.

Parker stepped into the light and for a moment Spencer thought it was a hallucination.

After all, Parker couldn't be here, it was impossible.

Parker and Spencer looked at each other until Hotch carefully took the gun from Parker's hand.

But they weren't interested in that at all.

Parker ran towards their boyfriend and wrapped Spencer in their arms.

"You're alive."

"You're real," Spencer murmured, burying his face in the crook of Parker's neck.