Micah’s story:

It is dark when I head over to the main house. I am hoping to be able to talk to Jazzy and visit Malcolm who is steadily getting worse. The house seems silent and dark despite there being a light on in the kitchen and others on in the bedrooms. I make my way towards the room where Malcolm is, whisper soft voices make me hesitate before turning into the doorway.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I hiss angrily as I take in the three forms on the bed. "I know I didn’t call you and Mitchell would never invite you here without being here himself!"

I am aware of my hands clenching into fists at my sides but I make no hostile moves as I glare at my oldest brother where he is propped up against the headboard of the bed. Jazzy is cuddled up against his far side and she one hand resting on the head of Malcolm who is stretched out in cat form on the other side of Edwin. Edwin jerks his head up to look my way but quickly drops his eyes, if it had been anyone else than Edwin I would have taken it as a submissive, respectful gesture.

"I called Edwin,"

I turn my head startled at the sound of Dwayne’s voice. He is sitting in a chair at the foot of the bed with Sam standing behind him. Sam doesn’t look at me or acknowledge me in any way, his undivided attention is focused on Edwin.

"I wanted to see Edwin," Jazzy’s voice is slightly hoarse and the face she turns towards me stained with dry tears.

"I’m not here to make trouble," Edwin says quietly. "Please, I would just like to visit with my sister and best friend."

"Put so much as one hair out of line …" I snarl threateningly.

"Stop it! Just stop it!" Jazzy snaps tearfully. "Promise me there will be no fighting! Don’t we have enough troubles without adding fighting between brothers to it?"

"It’s okay Jazzy," Edwin whispers to her. "They don’t trust me and to be honest, I can understand why. I made some stupid decisions and I have no one to blame but myself."

I force myself to look away from Edwin and find myself looking at Malcolm. His mouth is agape with his tongue protruding slightly, his ribs barely move with his breathing and his eyes are glassy slits.

"Where’s Doc?" I ask as I realise I can’t hear him in the house.

"He’s gone into town to beg, borrow or steal some drugs from one of the vets to try to help Malcolm," Dwayne says quietly.

"Edwin suggested that Doc call Rosy’s uncle the vet and ask for a second opinion," Jazzy says. She sniffs loudly and wipes her nose with the back of her hand without taking her eyes off the nearly motionless cat near her.

"And?" I prompt wondering why none of us here had thought of that.

"The old guy suggested different antibiotics to what Doc is using as well as other drugs," Dwayne says and I glance his way. "Stuff for pain and internal swelling, animal stuff as opposed to what Doc has been using."

"Micah I need to talk to you before I leave," Edwin says quietly and I give him my full attention once again. He is looking at me but quickly drops his gaze to my chest playing at being respectful.

"I don’t want anything to do with you," I snap dismissively.

"This is Williamson family business," Edwin says quietly and I growl angrily.

"Whatever it is maybe you should be discussing it with Mitchell and I," Jazzy ventures.

"This is warrior stuff," Edwin tells her apologetically.

"You might as well get outside now and say what you have to say," I tell him coldly. I don’t want Jazzy upset and I am not sure how much Malcolm is aware of any more.

"No fighting allowed," Jazzy says as Edwin eases her away from his side so he can get off the bed.

I watch as Edwin gives Jazzy a slight smile before turning his attention to Malcolm, he strokes his neck and pats his shoulder gently before moving his hand back up to grasp Malcolm by the scruff behind his ears gently.

"I expect you to still be here when I get back," Edwin orders softly.

As I follow my brother from the room I can see the tension in his shoulders and grin savagely to myself as he leads the way outside.

"I’m not going to kick your arse because that would only upset Jazzy," I say dryly when he turns around to face me. "But going on the look on Sam’s face you’re in for it once he knows Jazzy has seen the back of you,"

"I’m not here to argue with anyone," Edwin says in a calm tone. "I am here because Dwayne phoned and said Jazzy was asking for me, plus he told me about Malcolm. I also got a big favour to ask of you,"

"I’m all out of favours for you," I say coldly.

"This isn’t a favour for me," Edwin says with a touch of sadness. "It’s for someone who can’t ask for themselves. I got a phone call from Alan Cummings late last night, he’s nearly one hundred percent sure Rosy will reject her kitt …"

"What the hell is he doing calling you?" I demand angrily. "I know for a fact one condition that was made was you are never to have anything to do with Rosy or that Kitt!"

"He asked if I had a preference who the Kitt went to if Rosy can’t be reconciled with her own Kitt," Edwin says looking slightly uncomfortable.

"Do not tell me you are thinking of offering Jazzy a Kitt you do not even know will definitely need a home," I snarl as I grab Edwin by the front of his shirt and slam him against the garage. I hear the air audibly forced from his body as he hits the wall and I feel satisfaction at the flicker of pain on his face.

"Nooooooo …" The word whooshes out of my brother and I hold him against the wall as I fight the urge to pummel him for his insensitivity.

"I got … someone else in … mind," Edwin grunts when he manages to draw enough air into his lungs.

"Well why the hell aren’t you telling them about the Kitt?" I demand angrily. It burns like acid that he has any say over the Kitt I still consider mine. I know it is silly but in my heart, the kitt Rosy carries belongs to her and me.

"You want me to make sure Sam and Mitchell don’t try to stop you having any input in the kitt’s future? Is that it? You want me to go up against my brother-in-law because you don’t have the balls to do it?" I sneer into his face.

"I want you to raise my son," Edwin gasps and I realise my hold is half choking him. I loosen my grip and hear him draw a deep breath as I glare at him in disbelief.

"What? You offering him as some kind of consolation prize?" I ask and I am shocked at the bitterness I hear in my own voice. "You stole the love of my life and you expect me to …"

I let go of his shirt and turn away struggling for control of my temper, I can feel my inner cat just below the surface wanting to break free and tear Edwin apart. I drag my fingers through my hair pushing it towards the back of my head and holding it in place in an effort to keep my hands from around his throat.

"I want what’s best for Rosy’s kitt," Edwin says as if choosing his words carefully. "And I think you are the one tom who when he looks at him won’t see the wreckage I made of all our lives, you’ll just see a helpless kitt."

I spin around and slam both of my fists into the wall of the garage either side of his head, I feel the wall shudder beneath my attack but pay it no mind.

"It should have been my Kitt!" I roar at him. My face is right in his, barely a fingers breadth between us as I glare at him, a low continuous rumbling in my chest.

"I’m sorry, I never knew anything I done could touch you. You were always so far above me, so much better than me I never knew … I just wanted to prove I could be as good as you. I never thought I could hurt you. I am sorry," Edwin says and some part of me is shocked to see tears in his eyes. Shocked to see true remorse there as well.

Suddenly Dwayne, Sam and others are there between us. I can feel the aggression and agitation radiating off several of them and shrug off the restraining hands that try to keep me away from Edwin.

"You think you can just come back here and …" My rage robs me of words and an animal like growl comes from my throat as I turn away. I find myself pushing my hair back off my face once again and gathering it into a thick clump at the back of my head.

"No no no no no," It is Marissa’s chanted sobs that finally reach through my rage as she clings to one of my arms weakly. I stand still and look down at her to see she looks extremely delicate. Her face is very pale with red splotches around her eyes and nose, her clothes are slightly askew and wrinkled as if she has slept in them. Her feet are bare and probably cold from the cool night ground.

"It breaks my heart when you two fight," Marissa sobs as she clings to me.

"We stopped arguing okay Marissa," I say quietly before glancing around.

Everyone seems to have been drawn to the discord between Edwin and I, Jazzy is leaning against the corner of the garage looking pale and weak and even Wade is hobbling towards us.

"Please Micah, Edwin, no fighting," Jazzy says quietly.

My anger starts to recede, what is done is done and there is no going back to change how things turned out.

"Can someone help Marissa back to her home and make sure Wade makes it back also," I manage levelly. "Mikkarl, you go as well and make sure there is a proper meal for them and our visitors,"

I glance at Mal and Angela who have followed Marissa over from the little house, no doubt worried the commotion meant their son had died.

"Dwayne, why don’t you take Jazzy back inside," I say with a glance at him. "Jazzy needs to rest,"

"Sam," Dwayne says and jerks his head towards Jazzy then the doorway. "I’m staying outside for the moment."

It seems to take ages for everyone to disperse but it is more like just a few short minutes in reality before I am left standing outside with Edwin, Dwayne, Justin and Donny. Wade is a short distance away watching with a tense expression but I ignore him.

"I don’t know what the hell is going on here," Dwayne says quietly stepping forward to stand between Edwin and I, "But you both need to get the hell over yourselves and put Jazzy’s recovery first."

"I need an answer Micah," Edwin says quietly. "A simple yes or no,"

I stare at Edwin angrily, is this an attempt on his part to worm his way back into this clan? If I were to say yes would he imagine I would let him have some kind of say with the kitt?

"Give me over night to think about it," I snarl back at him. I catch sight of Wade watching us as I turn away and curl my top lip in a silent snarl as I stand facing him.

"What? Watching to see if all of your stupid playing Edwin and I off against each other is finally going to come to a head and one of us will kill the other one?" I hiss savagely.

"Come on Micah," Dwayne says stepping into my line of view and blocking the sight of Wade. "Let’s just walk it off brother,"

I resist for a moment then allow Dwayne to steer me away from the main house, away from everyone else. I am a bit surprised when I hear footsteps fall in behind us and I glance back over my shoulder to see Justin and Donny catching up to us. Edwin is watching the four of us unhappily and catching my glance turns towards the house. I turn my attention back to the ground in front of me and give a tired sigh as the tension begins to leave me.

"Do you want to go hunt some lunch in the beef paddock?" Dwayne asks easily.

"No, I need to have a talk with Jazzy." I say and take a deep breath.

"She’s going to chew you out for starting an argument with Edwin," Justin says dryly.

"As long as she doesn’t start throwing stuff at me I’ll be alright," I mutter to myself. It seems as if I half remember Rosy throwing stuff in a panic induced temper.

"She probably would throw the book at you IF we had a rule book," Donny says dryly. "Rule number one: no fighting means no fighting,"

"Look if it is okay with you guys I would like a bit of time to myself," I say as I come to a halt. "I got some heavy thinking to do."

"You don’t want company?" Dwayne asks with a raised eyebrow.

"No there is a thing or two I have to work," I admit and take a deep breath.

"Try not to be too long," Donny says quietly. "I overheard Doc telling Mal and Angela he doesn’t think Malcolm will live to see tonight,"

"Bloody fucking hell!" I swear not bothering to curb the words.

"Yeah it sucks," Dwayne says tightly. "Malcolm isn’t a bad bastard."

"I’ll keep it short," I say as I begin to strip off. For some reason I’ve been thinking clearer, dealing with stuff better in cat form lately. Strangely it is when I feel closest to Rosy as well, memories of her seem to come effortlessly while I am a cat. The burn of my change feels good and once I am ready I head for the trees at a steady lope, it will have to a quick run so I head for the swimming hole.

I pause to pull my clothes on before heading back towards the buildings, my run had only been short but the solitude has helped to clear my mind and my temper has cooled down. I shake my t-shirt out to rid it of any dirt or grass before pulling it over my head. I don’t bother with my old tennis shoes, just grabbing them in one hand before walking. I take note that Mitchell’s 4wd is at the main house along with Doc’s car and grimace as I think of Malcolm inside fighting for his life.

Inside almost everyone is in the open plan dinning-kitchen area, I glance around and can only see Doc, Sam, Mal and Angela not here.

"Hey Jazzy," I say quietly. "Can we go somewhere private? I’d like to have a chat with you."

"Can’t it wait?" Mitchell asks from beside her. He has his arms wrapped around her and she is leaning into his body.

"No, and it’s brother

– sister stuff," I say to prevent his request to go with us.

"It can wait," Mitchell tells Jazzy quietly. She hesitates a moment then shakes her head.

"It will take my mind off things for a while," Jazzy says before pressing a quick kiss on the corner of his mouth. "At least I hope it will,"

I catch the hard look she sends my way and know she intends to give me a dressing down about my earlier clash with Edwin. I lead the way outside and towards an old tyre swing she used to love when she was about twelve or thirteen. I halt beside it and stand looking out over the freshly mown paddock while I wait for her to start with her lecture.

"Is there any use reminding you I said no fighting with Edwin?" Jazzy asks dryly after a minute or two.

"Jazzy I doubt Edwin told you what we were talking about at the time and unless you know the full story don’t even bother getting involved." I say as I turn around to face her.

"I …" Jazzy bites the word off with a growl and looks away from me for several moments. "What did you bring me out here to discuss that can’t be discussed in front of my husband?"

"I’m going to be inviting Rosy here to see Malcolm," I say evenly. "If he passes away before Rosy comes, I will invite her to the funeral. I know you ordered her off your clan territory and if you don’t want her here, won’t allow her to come here then I will be going somewhere she is welcome." I tell Jazzy firmly. "I understand that you have issues with Rosy but I intend to do everything in my power to try to win her back."

"I don’t have any issues with Rosy," Jazzy says calmly.

"You turned on her when we fell out," I tell her firmly. "You decided to take my side against her and you ordered her off the clan territory."

"Now you listen to me Micah Williamson!" Jazzy snaps as she steps close and jabs me in the chest with a finger. "I know you and I was only saving you from yourself! You would have walked away and left this clan rather than put Rosy in a position where she was uncomfortable! You would have either tried to join another clan or moved into free territory and become a lone Tomcat! For as long as I can remember you have always looked after others even to your own detriment! It was time someone stepped up and looked out for you!"

Jazzy punctuates each sentence with a hard jab to my sternum and I find myself backing up from her. I can’t deny her claims either, I had been intending to walk out and leave my birth clan believing Rosy had nowhere else to go. Even hating her as much as I loved her at the time I had put her welfare ahead of mine.

"You didn’t have to order her out of the clan, you could have told Kurt it would be a good idea for her to visit his family and get to know her relatives," I say tightly.

"You would have still left so she wouldn’t feel uncomfortable when she returned," Jazzy snaps.

I turn away and take a deep breath as I try to control my rising annoyance. I don’t appreciate my kid sister suddenly having the answers to questions I had not been able to work out for myself.

"And it is about time you stopped feeling sorry for yourself, got your act together …" Jazzy starts almost furiously.

"Is there a problem here?"

I turn to face Jazzy, startled to hear Mitchell's voice. Mitchell is walking towards us with Dwayne, Steven and Mikkarl just behind him. All three of them are watching me warily.

"Yes, Micah is out here thinking he has to talk me into letting Rosy come back when he should be making phone calls or whatever needs to done to get her back where she belongs!" Jazzy snaps before I can say a word.

"Took you bloody long enough to come to your senses," Steven says dryly but the grin that lights up his previously dark face speaks volumes.

"Start by calling Kurt, then Cummings and let me know if you need me to make any calls," Mitchell says firmly.

"I’d heard Rosy had words with you before leaving," I say as I meet Mitchell’s gaze levelly. I could immediately kick myself, was I trying to find a reason to make things harder for myself?

"You know what kid sisters are like," Mitchell says with a shrug. "Darned irritating when they are way more smarter than you, only I woke up to the fact in around five minutes."

I glance between them not quite sure what is meant, I hadn’t been here for the conversation and I had not wanted to hear about what had been said.

"So are you going to start the ball rolling to get our girl back here or what?" Steven asks with that huge grin.

"I might just look in on Malcolm first because once I start making phone calls I won’t be thinking of anything else," I say reluctantly as I head back towards the main house.

"Doc’s cleaning out as much infection as he can and putting a drip in for the drugs. Caruthers called one of the vets in town and pulled a few strings so there was a pretty large box of medical supplies to collect," Mitchell says sounding pleased.

"What did you tell the old guy about your sister?" I ask curiously.

"I managed to dodge the subject but I wouldn’t be surprised if he was to call and ask to talk to her," Mitchell says with a sigh. As if on cue his phone rings and he stops to answer it, I don’t slow my walk towards the house. I want to get to making phone calls sooner rather than later.

Doc and Sam are in the kitchen sipping steaming mugs when I walk in, I glance around and notice Mal, Angela and Edwin aren’t in sight.

"How did things go?" I ask immediately.

"I done exactly as Donald said," Doc says steadily and it takes me a moment to realise he is talking about Rosy’s uncle, Donald Caruthers. "I cut a heck of a lot deeper than I would have dared to without advice but I think I found the source of the infection. I just hope Malcolm has enough reserves left to pull him out of this,"

"Is he conscious? Lucid?" I ask.

"He wasn’t unconscious when I left," Doc says tiredly. "Not too sure if he is fully aware or lucid though. The drugs seem to have taken the fever down and helped with the pain some, but he has to be in a lot of pain after my cutting on him."

"I’ll go in and see him," I say and head towards the sick room.

"He needs to rest," Doc says behind me. I hesitate a few steps out of the room, the guy is real sick, sure to be hurting and probably not clear on what is happening so I decide to go outside and start making phone calls. I pause as I am about to go back through the kitchen and look at Sam where he is leaning against the sink eating a thick sandwich between swallows from his cup.

"Sam I want to speak to you outside for a minute or two," I tell him. He glances at me and holds up a sandwich with only one bite taken out of it.

"Give me five," Sam says around a mouthful of food.

I bite back an order, I figure might as well let him finish his sandwich. He’ll be more likely to be in a good mood and be happy to give me his full support in winning back his sister’s affections. When he is finished his food we head outside, he is carrying a fresh mug of coffee and I head around to a bench seat near the garage to sit down. Sam sits on the far end of the bench and I look up to see Mitchell heading our way.

"What’s this about?" Sam asks with a glance at his brother, then at me.

"I’m going to invite Rosy to come here for a visit." I tell him. He doesn’t make any response so I continue on. "I’m sure she’d like to see Malcolm considering what has happened, she seemed to have a soft spot for him. And I am going to do everything I can to fix whatever went wrong between us."

"And?" Sam asks levelly.

"I would like your approval of me courting your sister," I admit. "Your approval would be a good thing. It’s not necessary to me personally but it would probably make Rosy more comfortable when she is around."

"Micah has always been good for Rosy," Mitchell says to his brother easily. "I believe she could be very happy with him if that’s what she wants."

"You reckon?" Sam asks sceptically.

"Don’t you think they could rebuild or build the relationship?" Mitchell asks.

"Neither of you saw what the break up done to Rosy," Sam says getting to his feet. "It didn’t just make her sad, upset, heartbroken … whatever you want to call it. Not the way it did with you Micah,"

Sam turns away and falls silent for a few moments. I am just about to speak again when he turns to face me.

"Something in Rosy broke and I had a front row seat watching her go to hell in a hand basket and there was not a damned thing I could do." Sam says through gritted teeth. "I know nothing I say or do will stop you going after her, I can even understand why you can’t let her go. But you hurt my sister like that again and so help me, I will rip your guts out and show them to you before you die."

I stand staring at Sam lost for words. I had heard things went bad for Rosy, hell I had even felt it but I had known but not fully understood until Sam said his piece.

"Rosy’s kitt is due in five weeks exactly," Mitchell says evenly and I glance his way to see the sheen of tears in his eyes. Apparently I was not the only one affected by what Sam had said. Mitchell clears his throat before speaking again.

"I’d like to see her home here where she belongs before it’s born,"

Rosy’s story:

The morning is clear and I close my eyes as I enjoy the combination of warm sunshine and a gentle breeze just cool enough to make the outdoor lounge comfortable in full sunshine. I can hear others in cat form not too far away but I have no inclination to join them.

"Hey Girlfriend,"

The greeting brings a smile to my face and I am not surprised to see both Drew and Jake approaching both wearing only low riding jeans. I have to admit that both of them are in excellent shape, lean without being skinny and well toned.

"Want to move those lazy bones of yours and come for a run with us?" Jake asks as he strolls up and sits on the edge of the lounge.

"I don’t feel like it," I say as I avoid his gaze. I know him well enough to know he will want an explanation why I have suddenly stopped changing to cat form for morning exercise and the chance to catch a rabbit or two for the last three days.

"Don’t feel sick do you?" Jake asks. I don’t have to look at him to know he is watching me intently.

"My body is grotesquely swollen out of shape, my ankles and feet are swollen most of the time. If I take more than two steps I become breathless, changing to and from a cat takes so much effort I end up exhausted, and you ask if I feel sick?" I snap angrily with an annoyed glance that doesn’t meet his eyes. "Then the answer is yes! I am sick to death of idiots who have nothing better to do than annoy me!"

I go to roll over and put my back to him but it is too hard to do on the lounge and I end up forced to remain on my back as I fail to hold in a groan of dismay. To my embarrassment I feel tears of helplessness gather in the corners of my eyes and I squeeze them shut in self-pity.

"Won’t be much longer until you have your old body back," Jake says gently.

"Only another four weeks and one day until this this this …" Words fail me and I end of a shriek of fury.

"It’ll be all over before you know it," Jake says soothingly.

"JUST GO AWAY AND LEAVE ME ALONE!" I scream in anger as I struggle to sit up.

Jake grabs me by the upper arm and pulls me into a sitting position but he and Drew leave before I can turn my awkward body and swing my legs off the lounge. I sit on the edge of the lounge watching them move away quickly, I rub at the small of my back where there has been a constant ache for the last few weeks before getting to my feet laboriously.

It feels like my entire life has shattered into a million pieces and many of them have blown away in the wind. Nothing seems to fit any more. The brothers I had found were getting on with their lives without so much as a thought for me. I refuse to hear from them, but I can’t avoid Alan or Jake telling me when my brothers have called. They had accepted my refusals to talk to them and part of me is still waiting for the invitation to Mitchell’s wedding, but I’m sure the wedding has been held which means I wasn’t invited.

I am feeling miserable as I head inside. I know I need to snap out of this feeling sorry for myself but I feel totally alone, as if no-one cares about me and no-one would miss me if I was to drop dead this moment. Inside the house is refreshingly cool compared to outside but I feel overly warm as I stop and look around before deciding to go see what Alan is doing. I find him in his office and he looks up as I pause in the doorway.

"Enjoy being outside in the sun?" Alan asks with a slight smile.

"What’s it matter? It’s not as if you care!" I snap feeling touchy.

"Having a bad day hey," Alan commiserates. "Let me know if there is anything I can do to help."

Suddenly I have the intense need for someone to care about me. Anyone. Just as long as there is someone who gives a damn if I live or die. Someone who will want to hold me, just wrap me in his or her arms and listen to my heart beating while I listen to theirs beating. I want someone who will make me feel safe and loved no matter how bad things are, no matter if we are fighting like cats and dogs.

I need someone to love me. An idea begins to form in my mind, a grain of hope begins to grow.

"I want us to get married. I need us to get married," I say. I meet Alan’s eyes and hold his gaze when he looks at me startled.

Sadness flickers across Alan’s face, he shakes his head slightly and looks away. "It’s too soon for you," he says and looks at me once again.

"You need time to adjust to … give yourself time and see if you really want to live here for the rest of your life. Marriage only ends when one of the parties involved dies, and if you aren’t in love with who your married to things aren’t easy at first."

"Please," I beg, reaching a hand out towards him. "Please, I need something to look forward to,"

"You have the arrival of your Kitt to look forward to. Once he is here you will be totally occupied with him and him alone. My late wife didn’t leave her bedroom or let anyone other than me near her and the new kitt for over a month, nearly two months after each birth," Alan says with sad smile. I can see remembering is bitter sweet for him.

I look away uncomfortably. How do I explain that I dread having my kitt? That the mere thought of seeing him for the first time nearly sends me into a panic? This life I carry reminds me of Micah, I’ll always think of him as the father. Just the thought of Micah brings the memory of how happy I had been with him. I shy away from the memories and feelings as soon as I realise where my thoughts have headed. I can’t forget the anger, hatred and disgust that had flowed from his mind into mine the last time I had felt his presence. Now all that is left is the crippling pain that is all that remains of what we had shared.

I don’t know if I will love this kitt more than any other kitt I will ever have or I will be unable to stand the sight of him. He is all I will ever have of his father and that will either be everything I need, or simply, not enough. I concentrate on breathing evenly, normally, as tears burn at the back of my eyes. For a moment I wish that something would come from out of the blue and end my life, stop my pain because I am too much of a coward to do it myself. Suicide is just not in me, but I wish the pain would end.

I wrap my arms around my lower ribs as I turn away, I want to escape this misery that hangs over me like a dark cloud. I glance out the long window on the far side of the room and catch sight of the boys playing outside. Terry is still in human form as he runs after two in cat form. A smaller dark form dashes from behind a clump of bushes and I recognise Dacey by his white markings. I smile as I watch Dacey slap one of the two bigger kitts on his way past as he heads for a tree. Warmth fills me as I watch the four boys, it fills my chest and seeps into my soul. I love these boys, they hold no painful memories for me. Suddenly I realise I will be okay. The love I feel for these boys will give me the strength to go on.

"I want to be married before the kitt is born," I say as I turn to face Alan and meet his eyes levelly. "In fact I insist,"

"Give yourself more time," Alan says firmly.

"Marry me," I tell him firmly. "Or I will find someone who will and we will take this territory off you,"

"You little Bitch," Alan says getting to his feet and glaring at me. "Do not threaten me,"

"It’s not a threat, it’s a promise," I say in little more than a low growl.

Alan is watching me through narrowed eyes and slowly sweeps down my body and back up again as if to take a measure of me. I notice his nostrils are flaring slightly with each breath and I suddenly wonder what the hell I was thinking. In fact I realise I hadn’t been thinking at all. Throwing something like that at an Alpha could be suicidal.

"Go to your rooms," Alan orders tightly.

I feel my temper rise at the tone of his voice and feel my top lip curl to my horror. I turn my back on him in an insulting manner and walk away steadily. Heading for my room seems like a good idea but I take my time walking through the house in my refusal to be rushed. I pause in the doorway where the barred gate separates my quarters from the rest of the house. My body goes tense and I straighten myself up as I look back over my shoulder at Alan who is following a little way behind. The niggling ache in my back eases as I pull my shoulders back slightly and I narrow my eyes at Alan as an annoyed growl rumbles in my throat. I relax when there is no reaction from him, the tension slowly leaves me and I turn and walk into my rooms. I don’t react when I hear the gate click closed, I continue to my bedroom and pause in the doorway as I glance around the room. For some reason the look of the room annoys me and I walk over to the bed.

I made it neatly before going outside but suddenly the neatness of it seems wrong and I strip all of the covers off the bed and tip the mattress off the frame as well. I kick and pull at it in annoyance until I end up with it leaning against the far wall, the bottom edge of the mattress braced against a dresser. I stand back looking at what I have done and feel a sense of satisfaction. Suddenly not content with the look of it I toss the blankets, sheets and pillows in the dark space that has been formed.

My stomach tenses and the bitter taste of breakfast rises in the back of my throat, I head for the toilet but don’t manage to make it to the bowl before I loose my breakfast. I lean against the wall for a few moments, eyes closed against the nausea that lingers. Finally I make it to the sink to wash out my mouth and swallow a mouthful of water. I glance at the mess on the floor and hesitate for a few moments before reaching for several handfuls of toilet paper. I clean up the mess and head back into the bedroom.

Suddenly the darkness behind the mattress looks inviting and I crawl into it on my hands and knees. A little rearranging and I have a reasonably comfortable resting spot, I lay down and close my eyes tiredly. I really don’t need my stomach deciding to rebel after the stupid incident with Alan. My stomach rolls at the thought before tensing, I concentrate on breathing slowly and evenly and after a few breaths I start to feel better.

I come awake abruptly, I open my eyes and for an instant I am not sure where I am but then memories of the morning flood back. I give a grunt of annoyance. I feel overly warm and there is no airflow under here. My mouth is dry and I really need a drink but don’t feel up to crawling out and getting one for myself. There is a noise just out of sight and suddenly a bright light is shinning into my eyes.

"What the f…" My angry complaint is abruptly cut short as my entire body tenses and a strange tightness encircles my body from my lower ribs down. I gasp and grab at the bed covers as the tightness increases to a nearly painful level before quickly easing up.

"Need anything? A drink of water? Trip to the toilet or anything?" Alan asks evenly.

"She’s spewed in there Boss," Jake says from somewhere other than behind that bright light that is no longer pointed in my face but going over my hidden spot.

"Get out of my room! Both of you go away! Just leave me alone!" I yell angrily and throw a pillow at Alan for good measure.

"Make sure it’s cleaned up properly," Alan says as he moves away out of my sight.

"She cleaned it up but there’s still the smell left behind," This time it’s Drew’s voice and I growl in annoyance.

"GET OUT OF MY ROOM!" I yell in rising anger.

"So speaks Little Miss Sunshine," Jake mutters.

"Jake, leave her be," Alan says sternly. "Unless I am mistaken she is in the early stages of labour."

"And she’s not trying to take our heads off, bonus," Jake says softly with a whistle even as I dismiss Alan’s comment.

"You’re an idiot!" I yell at Alan. "You don’t know what you’re talking about. This little mongrel isn’t due for another month!"

Anger and fear battle inside me. It can’t be true! I am not ready to face this yet! It is too soon. Confusion, anger and a deep sense of panic well up inside me, building to overwhelming proportions. I feel that tenseness invading my body and the tightening building once again. Suddenly I long for the security of my brothers’ presence, the comfort of Micah’s arms around me and I scream in wordless fear as I lash out frantically. I feel my fists and feet connect with the mattress, bedding and walls before the mattress is flung back.

I fight whoever it is who grabs me, wrapping me in their arms and holding me against their chest. All I can hear is the frantic pounding of my heart and someone whimpering with each breath they take. Soon the tightness recedes and my panic lessens. I become aware it is me who is whimpering, that the chest my face is pressed against belongs to Drew.

"It’s going to be a long day," I hear Alan say as I dissolve into tears.

I loose my sense of time as I cry and what must be contractions come and go periodically. I find myself dozing fitfully, always supported by a warm body that helps me find a comfortable position whenever my muscles cramp. I find myself drinking when cool, sweet drinks are pressed to my lips but I turn my head away when I smell food.

It must be mid afternoon when I am woken by quiet voices in the room. I open my eyes and look around uneasily, I don’t want anyone else in the room but I will tolerate Drew because of the way he eases my discomfort. I frown at the sight of Alan, Jake and another tom that is vaguely familiar. Alan catches sight of me watching them and gives me a half smile.

"Hey Rosy. Ian Yates is a midwife, he’s here to help you," Alan says in soft, gentle tones.

I glance at the tom he introduced and I feel the hair on the back of my neck stand on end. An uneasy feeling stirs within me and I give a low faint growl.

"Who is she exactly?" Ian asks with a glance towards Alan.

"Rosy MacIntosh. Kurt Black is her uncle," Jake says and gives me a grin. "How are you feeling now Rosy? Much calmer I hope,"

I don’t answer and Jake gives a shrug before turning his attention back to Alan and their visitor. Ian has a lot of questions but doesn’t direct them towards me. With each question my unease grows, I grow more and more certain I don’t like the tom that has been chosen to act as midwife. When he finally approaches me I watch as he clips his stethoscope into place before smiling in my direction. He doesn’t meet my eyes, which makes me feel uneasy, either he is scared of me or doesn’t like me.

"I’m just going to listen to the kitt’s heartbeat and make sure everything is fine, then I’ll check to see how things are progressing." He directs his explanation towards Alan.

I wait until he is nearly touching me before I make my displeasure and non co-operation known. A hard kick catches one of his knees and my clawing fingers narrowly miss his face as Drew manages to grab hold of me once again. I find myself pinned down roughly by both Drew and Jake almost immediately. A scream of rage boils up in my throat and I spit towards Ian’s face.

"Get out of my room! You freak! You pervert!" I scream at him.

"Now, now, no need to abuse Drew there like that," Ian says casually. "He’s only doing as his Boss wants him to,"

"Bastard!" I hiss at him. Even now he doesn’t meet my eyes. There is something about him …. I loose all train of thought as a contraction hits.

I scream behind the hand Jake places over my mouth, it doesn’t interfere with my breathing or bite into my face so I don’t fight it as I meet his eyes desperate for some distraction from the pain. I keep eye contact with him as I feel hands on my body, I want to scream and shout but I remain passive as the pain flows through me.

"Good girl, that’s it, good girl," Jake is murmuring quietly and I blink several times as the last of the pain recedes.

" …up high. It’s gonna be a long one, maybe not until tomorrow morning, evening is a more likely possibility." Ian is saying in little more than a whisper over by the door.

"Is there anything that can be done?" Alan asks not bothering to whisper.

"Best leave things to nature," Ian says and I can hear his footsteps as he is walking from the room.

I clear my throat behind Jakes hand and he turns his attention back to me, he had been watching Ian and Alan. He smiles at me and slowly lifts his hand off my mouth.

"Would have thought you’d have at least tried to bite me," he tells me with a grin.

"I don’t like that moron," I spit tightly.

"Drew? What’s poor ole Drew done now?" Jake asks with a cheeky grin and a twinkle in his eyes. It doesn’t surprise me that he knows who I really mean.

"I need to pee," I say bluntly and Jake throws his head back and laughs. It strikes me how much he reminds me of Malcolm. Sure Malcolm is less abrasive and not so overtly dominant but they both have that cheeky, teasing nature.

"Gonna cost you a kiss to make me let you go," Jake says with a chuckle and before I even have time to get angry he drops a light kiss on the tip of my nose, releases me and rolls away from me in one smooth motion. It takes me a moment before I figure out I am free. Drew had taken use of Jake’s teasing to release me and move away.

I get to my feet awkwardly, ignoring the hand Jake offers to pull me to my feet. I head for the toilet and make use of it before pausing to look at the shower longingly. Nearly my entire body aches and the thought of a soothing, warm shower is heavenly.

"Come on, I know exactly what you need," Jake says firmly as he goes into the bathroom and grabs a couple of towels. "The Boss has a spa bath in his ensuite. You’ll feel like a million dollars once you’ve had a soak."

"No I want to stay here!" I say heading towards my bedding.

"Well I want to relax in the spa and the only way I’ll be allowed in it is if you are in it as well." Jake announces firmly as he scoops me off my feet.

I wriggle and try to fight my way free but he has a firm hold and I make no progress before he walks into Alan’s bedroom and through to the ensuite. I gasp in shock and outrage as he steps into the spa and carefully sits down, he releases his grip with one hand for a second. A soft hum starts as the water begins to swirl and bubble. Even through my clothes the movement feels wonderful and I give a soft grunt as I pull away from him.

"Barbarian," I hiss avoiding eye contact.

"Pussy, pussy, pussy," Jake purrs at me. "Kitty, kitty, kitty,"

I manage an annoyed snort but I look away from him. It’s weird how he makes me face what I am with his almost cruel way of teasing me. I glance at him out of the corner of one eye and look away hurriedly when I see him peeling off his damp shirt.

"You might as well get naked," Jake says and I give a snort of disgust. "You’ll get the full benefit of the spa that way,"

"Who’s getting naked?" Drew asks startling me. I hadn’t heard him come into the room.

Jake laughs softly as I slip off his legs and into the water. I cough and splutter as water goes up my nose and down the back of my throat, I take the hand he offers and allow him to pull me to his side where he guides me onto a place to sit. I don’t resist when he reaches below the water and pulls my loose top up over my head. I no longer feel self conscious about nudity with them, they react to any efforts to hide or cover myself up with a lot more interest than if I am naked. I allow myself to relax in the warm of the water and the gentle massage of the jets. Slowly the tension begins to leave my sore muscles, my back eases its ache and I close my eyes as I rest my head back on the rim of the spa.

The following morning

"How are you feeling this morning? I have to go into town and I thought that maybe you would like to come along." Alan asks as I walk into the kitchen of his house. Jake looks up from where he is removing empty cereal bowls from in front of the four boys.

"I’m really tired, I don’t think I slept at all after I woke up at eleven o’clock but there hasn’t been any contractions since before I went to sleep," I say quietly.

"Rosy is feeling better and she’s happy again!" Patrick yells and in an instant I am surrounded by the four boys as they all crowd close trying to get a good morning cuddle. I know Alan would have said something to prevent them going near me yesterday when I was upset from all that was happening.

"Whoa there!" I say with a laugh as I tousle hair affectionately and straighten crooked shirts. I feel small sticky hands creep beneath my shirt to rest on the bare skin of my stomach.

"He kicked! He kicked!" Patrick yells and runs over to his father.

"You young hoodlums leave Rosy alone!" Alan says sternly but ruins it with the proud smile he gives his sons. I shy away from any mention of the kitt I carry, or any touch on my stomach from Alan, Jake, Drew or any of the others. But I let these four get away with nearly everything.

"I notice you boys have had breakfast but who wants to have some chocolate milk with me while I eat my breakfast?" I ask. I enjoy having the boys around and their presence always takes my mind off the fact I have to eat cereal and fruit for breakfast.

"Me! Me!" Dacey squeals excitedly. With his grey eyes and black curls he looks more like Jake then red haired Alan who has blue eyes. Even his solid, thick body resembles Jake more than Alan with his tall, lean muscular build. I have noticed that the two older boys seem to have picked up on this difference and rarely let Dacey join in their games even though at nearly two he is old enough to start playing the rough and tumble games they favour. They even urge Terry to victimise his younger brother even though he is barely a year older and spends much more time playing with Dacey than with them.

"Now you’ve let yourself in for it!" Alan laughs even as he begins putting mugs down for his four sons. I seat myself at the table and the boys quickly climb into chairs near me, I frown as Spencer pushes Dacey from the chair beside me and claims it for himself.

"Me! Me!" Dacey wails loudly and Alan pulls a chair out on the other side of Spencer and sits Dacey in it.

"Dacey was sitting beside me but Spencer pushed him off the chair," I point out.

"Dacey has to learn his place in the clan, as youngest he has the lower place." Alan says lightly as he gives each child their own glass of flavoured milk.

"Doesn’t seem right to me to reward nastiness and bullying," I mutter as I reach for my toast. I dislike the way Alan allows the treatment of Dacey but I have no way to stop the older two boys or get Alan to reconsider the way he allows them to behave.

"If you had been raised in your clan you would understand," Alan brushes my comment off easily. I nibble at my food with no real appetite while I enjoy the activity of the boys as they drink their milk and play noisily beneath the table.

"I’ll be heading into town shortly, I’ll be calling in on Yatesie and finding out why he didn’t come back out here or at least call and make sure everything was okay," Alan says with a quick glance at me. "You might like to make a list of anything you need for after the kitt arrives,"

I fall silent at the mention of the unborn kitt and turn my attention to the food in front of me. There are the sounds of a scuffle under the table and small bodies bump against my legs, several hard smacks are heard and then Dacey begins wailing loudly.

"Hey!" I snap sharply as the fight continues against my legs. I can guess Dacey has moved close to me hoping for protection from Patrick and Spencer.

"Enough!" Alan snaps as he and Jake each drag two boys out from beneath the table. "That is it Dacey, you are not coming into town with me today if you can’t behave!"

"You’re talking to the wrong boy," I mutter under my breath as I get to my feet.

"Rosy it sounds like you need to go and have a nap," Alan says firmly and I avoid looking at him as I head for my rooms.

I am in my living room sitting in the recliner when I hear two vehicles drive away, I look up from the magazine I was flipping through as I listen to the engines. Sure that it is Alan and one of the warrior’s vehicles I relax and turn back to the magazine. If both Jake and Drew are here like I suspect then I know one of them will come and check on me shortly. Lack of sleep over night and yesterday’s episode soon has me leaning my head back on the back of the recliner with closed eyes as I let the magazine rest face down on my lower ribs. I come awake with a start, the soft sounds of small feet register and I turn to look towards the doorway.

"Did we wake you?" Drew asks, the two youngest boys behind him. It doesn’t surprise me that Terry is with Dacey, I’m sure the other two give him a rough time when Dacey isn’t there.

"I guess I was more tired than I thought," I say quietly.

"You have a nap girlfriend," Drew says. "Jake and I will take these two for a walk so the house will be quiet for you."

I glance at the boys and give a little wave, Dacey grins his chubby grin and waves while Terry sticks a thumb in his mouth and begins sucking it. Suddenly I long to cuddle them close and curl up on the bed with them as if they were my own babies. I grimace and look away, my urges haven’t always been friendly and I know the toms still don’t trust me one hundred percent.

"I’ll see you when you get back," I say lightly and turn back to my magazine.

I try to immerse myself in articles in the magazine but nothing holds my attention, frustrated I glance at the clock and find barely half an hour has passed. Unable to settle I put the magazine aside, get to my feet and head outside. The sunshine is warm and I pause as I stretch and look around. I can see Drew, Jake and the boys just at the tree line playing and I head their way at a slow walk. I pretend not to notice as the two boys hide behind tree trunks, their little heads popping into view every few seconds to check on my progress.

"Where are the boys? I thought there were two little boys out here!" I say dramatically.

"Boo!" Both boys shout in unison as they jump out from behind their trees.

"Oh! Oh! You scared me! Oh!" I exclaim as I overact with surprise.

Both boys shout and laugh in delight and I put my hand over my chest as I sigh dramatically.

"You two are really good at hiding!" I exclaim and glance at Drew, then Jake. I can’t help noticing the way he is watching both boys proudly, his gaze lingering on Dacey just a fraction longer.

"Does Terry look like their Momma?" I ask as the two boys run off to play.

"Yes, he looks a lot like her only she was a dark blonde," Jake says quietly. A pained expression crosses his face and I watch as he walks away.

"Jake doesn’t talk about her much," Drew says beside me. "She was his partner’s wife. They were both in love with her, it sometimes happens that way. Alan didn’t share happily, "

"What do you mean?" I ask curiously. "You mean Dacey looking so much like Jake?’

"Alan must have forgotten something," Drew says with a frown and I follow his gaze to where a vehicle is approaching the house.

"Daddy! Daddy!" Terry yells excitedly and both he and Dacey were off running towards the house.

"Come back here you pair," Jake calls and begins walking after the still running boys. "That’s not your father’s car,"

"What the …" Drew mutters softly as the vehicle stops and a second one can be seen behind it.

The hairs on the back of my neck stand on end, there is something about the way those exiting the vehicle move.

"Boys! Here now!" Jake orders tightly and quickens his pace.

"Rosy, head for the bush. Get as far away as fast as you can!" Drew hisses. "Get back to your Uncle if you can,"

"What …" I take a step backwards uncertainly.

"Alan is dead for those two cars to be here!" Drew says as he starts backing up.

"But …" I glance between him, those getting out of the car clearly carrying clubs, the two little boys running forward unknowingly and Jake breaking into a run after them.

The driver of the first car gets out and opens the rear door and I watch as two black forms glide from the car. The smaller one moves forward with it’s head up, clearly searching for some smell. The second cat trots past and breaks into a slow lope in this general direction.

"Dacey! Terry!" Jake yells and I can hear the fear for them in his voice.

"Come on Rosy!" Drew demands as he grabs my upper arm and tries to pull me along with him.

I am aware that I am getting dragged backwards several steps but it seems surreal as I see the way the smaller cat lowers into head and drops into a stalking glide. The screech that comes from it is eerily familiar and I suddenly understand it is female, it is pregnant, and it is set on murdering my sons. Rage shoots through me and I throw myself into my change with a vengeance. The ground feels solid beneath my paws as I dig in with my hind claws and use all the power of my back legs to propel myself forward. I am locked on my target, that small deadly black form. I can hear someone screaming a name over and over. I barely see Jake as I flash past him, or the two boys standing paralysed with fear, the large black cat I flash by.

I ram into the front shoulders of the female with all the speed I can muster, I feel her go down beneath me. I bite and claw as her as I spin or roll so she can’t get a hold on me. Her growls of rage soon turn to whimpers of fear and pain as she tries to escape my wrath. I am relentless as I keep attacking her. How dare she try to kill my cubs!

Finally I grab a good hold of her neck near her front shoulders, brace myself and shake her viciously. When I let her go she is flung towards the warriors hurrying towards us. I snarl threats as I back away, I can hear my kitts crying behind me and glance towards them. I scream my rage as the large tom advances towards them abandoning the bloody body on the ground. I don’t hesitate as I throw myself on his hindquarters, my teeth sink deeply into muscle and I bite down hard intending to do some damage. When I am satisfied he will back off I leap away and trot after my kitts, I keep looking back at those following us as I follow the scent of my babies into the house.

I find them in their room cowering under their beds both in cat form. I crawl under after them to sniff them to reassure myself they are unharmed before moving into the centre of the room. I hiss threateningly at the warrior who appears in the doorway and he pulls the door all but closed between us.

"Found them," He yells and I snarl in reply.

I listen as several lots of footsteps approach, somehow I am not surprised when the door is opened slightly and Ian Yates peers in at me.

"I thought you said she was giving birth," someone accuses angrily behind him.

"Must have been false labour," Ian grunts as he eyes me coldly.

"Let me see her! She is not having this piece of my territory!" A female voice demands. I watch through narrowed eyes as a woman in human form moves into sight. I take in her dirty, messy appearance and know she was the one I attacked to protect my sons.

"You change to human form so you can be sent off somewhere else!" She orders angrily. "You stay here and I will see you dead!"

I snarl at her before changing back to human form with all the dignity I can manage.

"You are not keeping my territory!" She hisses angrily at me.

"This land doesn’t call to me," I say disdainfully. "You can have this territory. I will take my sons and go home,"

"Those Cummings bastards are not leaving this place alive!" She snarls back at me.

"You want this territory, I want my kitts," I tell her in a hard voice.