The view from the rooftop was beautiful, but it failed to calm me down.  I leaned against the railing – which was the only thing separating me from a straight drop – and breathed in a lungful of air. 

Max, Andrew Stone, the bruises on Heather's wrist; which were so similar to the one I had had, the possibility of one of my friends betraying me, summon the unavoidable panic attack stalking me from around the corner. 

I gripped the railing tightly, but my fingers tingled. I felt them going numb. Staying numb. Even when I flexed them. Everything around me started fading into a dull kaleidoscope and my knees hit the floor. I felt my world sink and shut down, while my body couldn't decide whether to float away or stay put.  

"Veronica!" I heard Tyler's underwater garbled voice swim through the void. "C'mon Tiger, breathe!" 

He kneeled down beside me, with a frantic look on his face. He rubbed his palms up and down my arms, warming up my artic skin. I shut my eyes, my hands balled up in my lap, and attempt to get a grip on myself.

Invisible fingers fist inside my chest and around my heart. Choking it. Muffling my sluggish heartbeat. 

"Breathe, Tiger." 

My entire body hurt. The more I tried to breathe the more I felt my chest constrict. Shattering and crumbling under the weight, I sink into myself. 

"It's okay. It's okay." I felt him pull me closer to him, before enveloping me into his arms, my cheek against his chest and I unconsciously snuggled closer against him. I liked how safe he made me feel. His hands ran up and down my spine. His heartbeat settled mine. 

I don't know for how long he held me, his voice soothing my nerves as he comforted me and I slowly felt my breathing return to normal. 

After a long stretch of silence, I heard him murmur, "Has this happened before?" 

I nodded against his chest and he kissed the top of my head before pulling me closer. "What happened? What did he do?" 

I didn't want to talk about it. I didn't want to go through it again. So I didn't give him any answer and closed my eyes. I was so exhausted.

After a few minutes he tried to pull away to look at my face but I held him tighter. "Talk to me. Please."

Silence. I needed silence. 

"Dammit V, I'm worried." I could hear the frustration in his voice, but it was not enough for me to reach out to him. I did not want to talk about it.

"It's all my fault, " he murmured after a while. "I shouldn't have left you alone when I knew there was a possibility of him being here at the party too."

Stop blaming yourself!  

He sighed. "I'm so sorry. I should have been more careful–" 

"It's not your fault," I snapped, interrupting him. I pulled away, just enough to look at him. "Stop that!" 

His expression turned tender, as he cupped my face in his hands. "There you are." 

I leaned into his touch and closed my eyes. "Thank you." 

"Look at me." He silently commanded and I did. His brown eyes grounded me. They anchored me to reality and made me feel safe.

Have you ever looked at someone and hoped they stay in your life forever? Because I did. In that moment that was all I could desperately wish for. 

"Are you okay?" he whispered. 

"I am now." I gave him a small smile. 

"You scared the shit out of me, baby," he sighed. "I was so worried. Does this happen often? Have you ever spoken to someone about these panic attacks?" 

I just stared at him. My cheeks flushed, and a small smile on my face. 

"What?" he asked, confused. 

"You called me baby." I grinned. 

"Seriously? That's what you pick up on when I'm trying to speak about something important here?" 

"Yes." I nodded and he let out a small chuckle. 

He surprised me by suddenly pulling me onto his lap and wrapping his arms around my waist. "Yes, I called you baby. Did you like that?" 

I liked it much more than I probably should. But instead, I said, "Meh, I like Tiger better." 

"Liar," he smirked. "The blush on your cheeks says otherwise." 

I ducked down and hid my face in the crook of his neck, making him chuckle.

"Can we please talk about what happened?" I heard him say, sounding serious. 

"Not now. Please, " I mumbled. "I promise I'll tell you everything eventually, but for now, can we talk about something else?" 

I didn't want to think of anything beyond the moment I was in. It felt perfect to be sitting under the night sky in silence, bathed in a soft orange light coming from a string of lights hung on the wall, next to the staircase. But most of all, it felt perfect to be wrapped up in his arms.

"Alright. Let's talk about something else." He agreed as he nuzzled his face in my hair. "I want to take you out on a date." 

"What!?" I sat upright, suddenly nervous. 

"Yeah. I want us to start hanging out more often, go on dates." 

I swallowed hard, staring at him. "You want us to be a couple?"

"Yes." He tenderly brushed my hair away from my face. "What do you want?" 

"I...I don't know..." I bit my lip, staring into his eyes. "I'm not used to any of this. You. Us. It's uncharted territory for me." 

"I get it. I know exactly how you feel," he murmured, placing a soft kiss on my temple. "If it's any consolation, I'm just as scared as you are."

I closed my eyes and leaned into him. "I don't like being scared." 

"You and me both." He caught my chin between his fingers and tipped it up, before covering my mouth with his in a soft kiss. I closed my eyes and melted into him. 

What started out as a simple, innocent kiss, turned into something hot and heavy in no time. Without breaking the hot seal of our mouths, I slightly shifted in his lap and turned my body around to straddle his waist. 

When I pulled away after a minute, his eyes held mine with such startling intensity, that I was afraid if I blinked, it would give him just enough leverage to see right into my thoughts.

He framed my face with his hands and leaned forward until our foreheads were touching and our lips were a hairsbreadth away. 

"We can take it slow, I won't rush you," he said with quiet intensity. "But please know that I want you. All of you. And I'm not going anywhere."

He held my gaze steadily and I was surprised by the storm of emotions in his eyes. A storm that fascinated me, even if I knew that it could potentially swallow me up. Even if I was scared of where I'd end up once it had passed. 

"I want you too," I whispered, as I looked at him in wonder. "And I can't believe that you'd want someone as messed up as me." 

"You're perfect and you better start believing it because –" He placed my hand on his chest, right above his heart and I could feel it thumping wildly under my palm. "– this is what you do to me." 

Without another word I sank my fingers into his hair and kissed him, trying to pour all my feelings into it. He kissed me back just as passionately, his hands gliding down my back and caressing the stretch of skin exposed by the crop top I was wearing. He had me panting and gripping him by the hair as I sank deeper into the kiss. Sensation upon sensation swamping every part of me. 

The pull between us was unlike anything I had experienced before. Powerful, consuming, and scary. 

I shivered as he pulled me closer, his hands sliding down my back and curving around my ass to hold me in place. When his mouth left mine and he started placing hot, wet kisses on my neck, I let out a low breathy moan that had him gripping me tighter. 

"Holy shit!" A voice intruded. 

We broke apart and whipped our heads towards the door to find Jace and Julian standing there

"Oh my God, what the hell! " Julian yelled, covering his eyes with his hands. "I'm going to have to bleach my eyes out after that." 

Geez, this is so embarrassing! 

"Don't be so dramatic," Tyler said, seeming completely unaffected. 

I slowly untangled myself from him and scrambled out of his lap, cheeks burning with embarrassment.

"Sorry to interrupt." Jace shot me a smirk as he walked towards us.

"You should be sorry, " Tyler grumbled under his breath and I chuckled. 

We got up from where we were sitting and I turned around, intending to go and talk to Julian. But Tyler pulled me back to him, his eyes searching my face. "You okay?" 

"Yeah." I smiled.

He nodded and kissed my forehead, before giving me a warm smile and stepping away. 

The warmth in his eyes melted my heart. His smile left me wondering how I would survive if I let him inside my life and he left.