Running. It became my life after the apocalypse. It saved lives, so many lives, but now it won't be able to save mine.

The coolness of the autumn night causes the constant sweat that my body releases to chill my skin and leave my teeth rattling together. I clench my jaw in hopes to keep the zoms from hearing, and I feel the regret of leaving that jacket lying there on the table.

My hands and fingers are cramping from the tight grip I have on my axe. I haven't lessened it from my grip since I fled New Canton, which feels to be an eternity ago.

My feet are numb from pain. It took about an hour of running for them to beginning aching, another two to make the pain unbelievable, and now, however long it's been seeing as I've lost count, there's no pain at all. No feeling.

I guess I should get used to it, since I know the truth-what's going to happen to me.

I'm going to die tonight.

Denying it would be pointless. I know. The chances of me making it unbitten by sunrise are slim to none. I hate the thought of me becoming one of those things, but it's most likely going to happen. I'm most likely going to die.

I raise my axe over my head before bringing it down on another zombie, effectively ending it and keeping myself alive for a little longer. I can't stand the thought of someone doing the same for me, but I know I can't run forever, and there's no shelter for miles.

I start going again, pushing my weakening body to go faster when I hear the groaning of the undead in the otherwise silent night. I know soon enough exhaustion will take over, and I'll pass out to become the meal of whichever zom that happens to shamble by.

I swallow down the bitter taste of bile as the thoughts swirl around my head like a tornado. I've never actually thought about dying by a zombie. I thought it would be something like a sickness or maybe-if I got lucky-old age. I never imaged I'd die at the young age of fifteen and... what, three fifths? Something like that. The thought itself nearly brings tears to my eyes.

No! I think to myself angrily, squeezing my eyes shut. I'm not going to become one of them! If I'm going to die I'm going to stay dead. I know where I'm going afterwards...

But still I feel like I could have done so much more. That I could've helped and eased my guilty conscience a bit more before leaving this world to head towards heaven.

Guess I'll get to see Wes again. I smile tightly. I come to a stop, my breathing labored but quiet to keep from drawing extra attention. This is the first time in a while I've been away from any zombies. And I know I'll use my time wisely.

I look down at my bloodied axe. I'll have to do the same thing to myself as I have with zoms if I don't want to get infected, but even if I did do that, my corpse would still be lying around to be eaten. I don't want that. I'd rather give Abel a chance to find my body-to know I'm gone.

Then it hits me.

The rope.

I quickly shrug off my backpack and pull the coil of rope from my bag, cringing when the electrical supplies clink together noisily.

Janine's lucky I didn't just scatter them along as I ran.

The thought came to me more that once, but I refrained from doing so because the Township needs these, not just Janine. I think of the few people in Abel that I'll miss as I run to a nearby tree. Willis and Milo, seeing as they stayed eager to get to know me even after the new started wearing off, and Penelope too, even with her shyness.

Caleb. I'll miss him even if I have only known him for about a week or so. He's funny, and kind, although he did tease me about liking Sam.

Which I don't...

But still my chest tightens at the thought of him. Oh God, am I going to miss him. I know I shouldn't but I will. I'm going to miss him so, so much. He was so kind, and funny, if not a bit of a dork. A part of me wishes we would've met before the apocalypse, but that would've been impossible since I was in America at the time, not to mention if we had met our age differences would have kept us from being friends.

I take a look at the tree in front of me, feeling a lump begin to form in my throat, but I swallow it down. I take my axe and strive to carve my name into the tree's bark. It looks messy, but it's readable. So when they find my body, and if I'm still recognizable, they'll know my name.

Although I'm really not sure why I want them to know...

I leave my backpack at the base of the tree, taking the rope with me. Once I reach a spot that I know the zoms won't be able to reach my lifeless, hanging body, I begin to tie it around the tree branch. Then I tie the noose, staring at it for several seconds before putting over my head and around my neck, making sure to keep it tight.

I feel myself start to tear up, knowing this is it. I remember the last time I cried...

After my voice was stolen from me.

That feels like such a long time ago...

I give the rope a tug, frowning at the sight of a small strand breaking. I brush it off and tell myself it's just me trying to back out of this. I take in a deep breath-my last breath-and slide off the tree branch.

I hoped my neck would break at the jerk of the rope and kill me instantly, but it didn't. The sharp pain that ran up my neck and shoulders weren't enough, so I feel the tightening of the rope against my neck, burning into my skin. I gasp for air but none comes. I kick my feet in attempts to find leverage, my body's instincts to survive overriding my brain.

I mouth out my own name, no sound coming out. As I feel myself starting to slip away, I try to remember what it sounded like to say my own name, but I can't. I can't remember.

Maybe Wes will tell me after I meet him again.

Yes, that's what will happen. My vision begins to go blurry and my feet aren't kicking with as much vigor as before. I'll be gone and get to see Wesley and my mother and father and my church family and-

The rope snaps, and I fall right on my back, pain exploding there and making the stabbing ache in my shoulders and neck ten times as worse. Air fills my lungs in a desperate gasp, and I feel tears spring to my eyes once more.

No!

With a soundless sob I push myself up, grabbing my axe and keeping it in a tight grip. I don't want to do this. I don't want to die this way, but I won't let myself become one of those things.

Just one good blow to the head. Get the brain to make sure I don't get infected.
That's what I tell myself as I lean the axe back. Tears are slipping past my eyelids as I get ready to send my weapon flying into the front of my skull.

There's a crackle in my headset.

"Runner Five? Runner Five. Come in, Runner Five. Can you here me?"

I suck in a sharp breath of air, letting the axe slip from my fingers and fall to the ground.
Sam?

"Come in, Runner Five. Are you out there?" His voice tiredly says. "Calling Runner Five. Come in..."

I nearly sob with joy, but I manage to keep myself together as I tap out an answer. My fingers are shaking as my breathing quickens.

'I'm alive, Sam. I'm not sure where-'

"Runner Five... I don't know if you can hear me. Our scanners are down. It never works that well at night anyway, and a couple bits of equipment have broken down so..." He lets out a long sigh, "so there's no way to see where you are."

I slowly stand up. My eyes are wide with horror and my legs are shaking as the realization hits me that my mic's broken, probably from the jerk of the rope.

He can't hear me.

"Truth is I-I don't even know if you're alive. Odds aren't good, right?" Sam laughs bitterly. "Hey, odds aren't good for any of us but I'm still-well, I guess I'm still alive."

So am I, although I won't be for long if I don't get moving. I hear the moans of the zoms around me, and I quickly put on my backpack. One hand grips the strap in habit while the other has wrapped around my axe. With the noose still tied around my throat I start running, having a new found desire to stay alive.

"Runner Five, we... we don't know where you are. We know you didn't get taken by New Canton. We managed to track that much, but you haven't come back, and it's the middle of the night, Runner Five. And there's a reason we don't send patrols out at night.

"If you're where we think you might be-to the North-the area's swarming with zombies, and they head for us at night." I hear him take in a breath that sounds almost like it hurts. "If they get here before you do it... we're gonna have to bar the gates. They'll be no way for you to get in and we'll... I'll have to watch..."

There's a painful tightening that occurs in my chest as I hear his voice hitch. The pain makes it that much harder to run.

"You're not even my second Runner Five, you know that? You're my fourth. I guess there's no better reason you'd make it back than any of the others... but we've put the red beacon on top of the tower, so if you can see it, my best advice is... run."

As if on cue, I see a flashing red light to my right. It shines through the night for me, and I can't help but sigh with happiness.

Jesus on a boat.

I hear a snarl from beside me, and in a moment of panic I swing my axe with everything I have, making a deep cut in the side of an undead shambler. I pull the axe out with slight resistance before slamming it into the side of its head. The blade goes deep and once I pull the axe from its place the zom falls to the ground, dead for good this time.

With adrenaline still pumping I take off with much more energy than before. My legs still burn, and the aching numbness in my feet is still present but I easily ignore it at the thought that I still have a chance to live.

"So... I'm just gonna keep talking for awhile," Sam says, his voice sounding hollow. "Well, for all I know I could be talking into the ear of a zombie. But hey, undead fiend who used to be my friend, Runner Five. At least I can irritate you with the sound of food you can't get at."

I stumble at his words, barely hearing his forced laughter.

"Over here, look at this tasty human meat..." His voice trails off. "Yeah, we've all gone crazy these past few years, haven't we, Runner Five? I-I mean, you know, that's a thing you don't really think about during an apocalypse. How's it going to effect your ability to... like, be normal ever again? Do you think we've just forgotten how to be normal? Do you even remember what normal felt like?"

I can't answer that question. Honestly, I try to keep myself from remembering anything before, because it's all gone, and what was left soon became broken and shattered and shipped off to Mullins Military Base. I'm not even sure I'd want normal back if I could have it...

What would Wes say to that? What would she say to that?

"I called you my friend just before, didn't I?" Sam's voice is small, but those words are enough to make me jerk slightly, sending a shooting pain up my shoulder and neck. "Is that cool with you? I mean, I'm definitely not your friend if you've gone gray, but I feel like we have a kind of... simpatico... something? I rather do... did like talking to you. Don't know if you felt the same way."

Yes. Yes, I did! My mind screams. A loud moan rings in my ear far too loudly for liking, and I push my ever tiring legs to go faster.

"I guess we're talking now," He muses. "So, yeah. Let's just talk like normal people-like buddies or something. Before all this I-I bet you had a pretty good life, yeah? Someone like you, I can see it. People you cared about, teachers you didn't hate.

"I know lots of people don't like to talk about all that stuff. 'Think forward,' the Major says. 'Rebuilding is key,' but I feel like we have to remember what it was like so we know what we're building, don't we." There's a slight pause in his voice. "I-I don't mean escalators and shopping malls and frozen yogurt, although I could really go for an ice cream roll right now."

A smile graces my face as I hear him chuckle. He's rambling, the little dork.

"Do you remember those things? Cake outside and ice cream in the middle, or was it the other way around?" He laughs again, and my smile fades. "I don't even remember anymore. Now wait-wait, hang on. I'll go and check."

My eyes go wide in panic. No! No, Sam, stay. Please!

"And um, if you're still Runner Five, keeping running."

Silence. No music fills my ears this time. The only sounds are my steps and ragged breathing, along with the songs of moans, groans, and growls coming from the walking corpses. I pick up my pace, my hand grip tightening on my axe as I look behind me.

I see three zoms trailing behind me. They're slow, and I can take them out easily but looking at the beacon still off in the far distance, I know I need to keep to save my strength, so I keep going to eventually outpace them.

•

"Okay. Hi. Right, so two things. A: I was right. It was cake outside and ice cream inside. B: Apparently checking this is not a good enough reason to wake Janine up in the middle of the night. Okay? Okay. Got it."

I glower at the mention of Janine. Right now I'm rather ticked at her and seeing how Sam's the one making an effort she can go-

Nice thoughts. It's by the grace of God you're alive right now. Do you really want to push your luck?

I scowl at my voice of reason, but push those thoughts away to continue listening to my radio operator.

"So where were we?" He asks. "Ah, yeah. Before. Want to know what I did before this? I'm imagining you're brimming enthusiasm, that with these mad skills you'd think I was a DJ or a radio host or something. Nuh-uh. I was a student, man. Engineering degree. I was one of those kids that had those weird birthdays that made it seemed like you skipped a grade in school or something."

He laughs sheepishly. "I was-just for the record-really, really, really, terrible at it. I didn't even enjoy it. That's the sad part... I tried so hard and-and my parents, they wanted to be so good at it so much." A sigh comes through my headset. "And I... yeah. Well, I guess it's good they died not knowing I was probably going to fail the course."

I feel a pang of sympathy at his words, and I can relate in a small way.

My family died not knowing what a horrible person I was-still am.

"My dad would've been so angry. He was angry when I failed French and he didn't even care about French. He's Chinese. He was all, 'you have dishonored the family' and all that. And it's weird because-because he didn't even give me a congratulations when I passed BSL."

I furrow my brows at that, a twinge of anger bubbling inside me. I sigh through my nose as sweat rolls down my face. How could you say that to your own family?

Like you have room to talk, My mind casually whispers. Do you not remember the last words you said?

I clench my jaw as my shoulders stiffen and the pain from before returns. I ignore it, knowing my situation was so much different. I had reasons for my words...

"You know what's really bad, Runner Five? You know what's really, really horrible? This-what I'm doing right now-is what I wanted to do. I used to mess around at the radio stations at Uni. I wanted to talk on air or work behind the scenes." His voice looses its temporary excitement. "I thought that if maybe I failed my degree my parents might let me go do what but uh... yeah.

"And what's really, really bad is somedays... somedays I'm grateful for all this because I don't have to get up in the mornings and go to classes and pretend... pretend that I care about engineering." There's a long pause. "I-I'll be right back."

I didn't try to stop him this time. I didn't really try the first time but I don't even try to do so mentally. I'm slightly scared he won't return, that he'll believe I'm dead and decide it's not worth it... That I'm not worth it, but  I shake my head and refuse to let the insecurities fill my head because I have to make it back to Abel. The red beacon is getting closer and closer the more I run. It's just a matter of time.

•

"Hey, hey. Hi," Sam's voice floats through my headset once again, and I smile at hearing it. "I-I say hi; Possibly I mean, 'damn you, fiend who has taken over the body of Runner Five,' or possibly I mean.... 'sorry you're dead, Runner Five.'

"That stuff's weird, isn't it? Not the people you know are dead; I-I know my parents are dead because... yeah. But my sister-no idea," He starts to tell me about her just starting her first year of Unit to be a lawyer. "She did skip a grade. Made my parents proud. Came home with top grades after her first term.

"You remember the Christmas before... before the fall of civilization?" He lets out a breath. "All the praise for her, I was jealous, and then... the thing happened while she was staying with her boyfriend, and we couldn't get her on her phone and she-she never knew our parents had turned and... I don't know. She's probably dead, but you never know, right?"

I swallow thickly. It's been two years since I last saw a family relative, and honestly I don't know if...

"And you know what else is weird?" Sam continues, rambling on for the sake of talking while having no clue how much I both do and don't want to hear his voice. "How some person you barely know will suddenly come floating in your head..."

I barely listen to him talk about Simon or Steve or whoever Sam thinks his name was as I hear groans of the undead just behind me. Craning my neck while trying not to wince in pain I see at least five zoms following me. One hand grabs my backpack strap in panic as adrenaline is the only thing keeping me going.

"This morning, I woke up from dreaming about him and I realized I don't remember his name," He continues. "And he's probably dead, and maybe I'm the only person left alive who remembers him. And maybe... maybe that'll be the same way with you, Runner Five. If you're gone, who'll be left to remember you?"

There's a huff of frustration and sadness and I can picture Sam running his hands through his hair.

"Yeah, sorry. I guess that's not too inspiring. What I'm saying is... run, Runner Five. Run home, if you can."

•

My breaths are quick and heavy. My arms are heavy from carrying the weight of my axe. My legs are burning. My body is covered in sweat and dirt.

My adrenaline is beginning to not be enough, exhaustion starting to take over my body. My steps are beginning to slow even with the sounds of flesh eating zombies behind me. I'm starting to burn out.

But there it is-Abel Township. I see it's poorly built walls and average deferences and I want to jump for joy, but I try to save what's left of the adrenaline in me to just keep going.

"I don't know, Five," Sam yawns, his voice sounding depressed. "They said to me just now that I should probably hit the sack sometime soon. They'll send out someone else to keep sending out pings throughout the night but uh, I-I've got to be honest. We're losing hope here."

No. No, please. I'm right here. I'm coming. Please just give me a few more minutes.

I force myself to keep running, trying to push myself to go faster but to no avail. I'm losing energy. I don't know if I'll be able to make it.

"Couple of zoms have arrived at the gate. And that usually means the bigger hoard is that on its way. Maybe only a few minutes until we bar the gate."

I grunt as I attempt to go just a bit faster-just a bit to get me closer to the Township. I start waving a hand in the air, my muscles screaming at the action.

Please see me.
Please see me.
Please see me.

Sam sighs, and I can here the disappointment in his voice.

No. No, this isn't happening.

"Another good runner gone. Another piece of equipment lost, and we're..." His voice cracks, although it is barely noticeable, "the next time I see you I may just have to shoot you in the head."

No! I can still make it.

A silent cry leaves my mouth as I push my body to go faster. My feet pound into the ground, each step agony, but I can't stop. If I do it's certain death.

"No one stays sane through this, Five. Whatever the future is, it's not gonna be like the past. No amount of ice cream rolls will make it better. No one saying they're proud of me would make it okay...

"Maybe you're better off is all I'm saying. I know we're not supposed to say that but sometimes I think... maybe if-if you don't have to try to build the future then you're the lucky ones."

Sam Yao, you are an idiot, I think. How could he think walking around as a rotting skin bag would be better off? Being dead is better off than being one of those monsters.

"Maybe... what?" His tone becomes one of confusion as a muffled voice speaks to him.

I continue to wave up my arm, the other just barely able to carry my axe.

Please see me.
Please see me.
Please see me.

"What is it? I told you our scanners are down. We can't... Oh my God!" He exclaims. "Is that-Runner Five, I can see you!"

It takes everything in me to smile at his comment. My steps keep falling out of rhythm since my legs are about to give out, but I'm close. So, so close.

"Runner Five! Runner Five, if you can hear me, I can see you. My God, Runner Five," He laughs-truly laughs-and I feel like that's the best sound in the world right now. "You uh, you can't see them but there's a tail behind you. Zombies-about thirty of them. They're-they're getting closer."

My body aches, pain erupting from everywhere all at once and the world around me starts to become blurry. But I'm so close. The gates are just a few more yards away.

"Run, Runner Five! Run! Run!" Sam's panicked yet equally excited voice commands. "Raise the gates!"

I hear the sound of the gates being raised and for once I think of it as a beautiful, beautiful sound. My cramping hand releases the axe as soon as I reach safety. My world becomes a blur of blacks as I sway on feet with Sam's jubilant voice ringing in my ear.

"We've got you, Runner Five!" He shouts the world fades. "You're home."

A/N: Here's another super long chapter. Heh... anyway. Hope you liked because this one was a pain in the rear end to write. If you liked, please make sure to vote and comment because I love to hear from you! Thanks, everyone!