The window squeaks as I open it causing me to wince. I hope no one heard that. Holding my breath, I crawl onto the roof, the instant cold hitting me right in the face. I zip my coat up to my chin and then make my way to the edge and jump down from the 3-foot drop, landing in slush. Just lovely.

Adrian is waiting for me.
"Why can't they just cancel these outings during the winter? It's frigid, I can't feel my toes."

He shrugs. "Everyone needs to party. Especially in the winter when the days are short, cold, and depressing."

"Hmph," I say, stuffing my hands in my pockets.

He smiles, taking ahold of my elbow and dragging me after him. "Come on. It will be fun."

"I highly doubt it. We'll all turn into ice cubes before our cold brains register that this was a dumb idea and not fun at all."

"Look who's being a bad sport," Adrian smirks, his evergreen eyes twinkling in the dark.

I scowl at him. "Just so you know I'm only doing this for you."

Giving my elbow a little squeeze, he says, "I'm flattered, truly I am."

"Ughhhh."

He smiles--- the 1 that can melt your heart into mush. "Just put a smile onto that pretty face of yours ok? I don't need people thinking that my girlfriend is Miss Grump."

"I am Miss Grump at times and they all already know that."

"Hmmm, that is true."

I shoot insanely sharp daggers at him with my eyes. "Shut up. I'm tired and freezing. I want to go home already."

"After the party sweetheart."

He continues to pull me along, entering the woods, a chill creeping up my spine. I begin to shiver, my 32 teeth chattering together. Brrrrr. I have become a human-shaped ice cube.

We reach our clearing and Ellie and Sierra wave me over, sluggishly I walk over to them.

"Hey," Ellie smiles.

"Hi," I mumble, burying my chin into my coat.

"What's wrong?" Sierra questions.

I look at her, hoping she'll see that I'm annoyed. "What's wrong... is the fact that it's one of the coldest nights of the Winter and you all chose to have a party... a party that's taking place outside!"

Sierra blinks at me. 1-2-3. "You don't have a warm coat?"

"A warm coat won't keep out this cold air. It's frigid."

She shrugs. "I feel fine. Can't even tell it's cold outside."

"That's because you are warm-blooded," Ellie pipes up. I forgot she was standing here.

"Ellie's right," I say. "You're always hot."

Sierra smiles. "True."

"So that's unfair to the rest of us," I complain, my teeth chattering once again.

"The party wasn't my idea," she begins. She then points a freshly manicured nail at Levi, who I haven't noticed till now is lounging on a log, Katie at his side like glue. "It was his."

As if he could sense us watching him, Levi glances up his eyes meeting mine. He smiles a smile that is only meant for me. I look away, flustered.

Why does Levi Cruze only let me see the true him?

Robin shows up with the music, phone, and speakers. "Let's get this party rocking," he shouts, blasting the newest hits.

Adrian then appears at my side, 5 fingers pressed lightly on my lower back. "Ready to dance my dear?"

My 32 teeth won't stop chattering and I'm sure by now my nose is as red as a sunburn. "No, I'm too cold to move."

He takes a step closer his body engulfing mine. "I promise to keep you warm."

I'm now looking at him in the dim light, his golden hair blinding me. "You better stick to that promise or else you'll regret it."

This gets him to smile flirtatiously, causing my heart to leap out of my chest. Hey, heart, come back!

"Trust me Little B, when have I ever let you down?"

He gazes down at me with intense hooded eyes and I find myself not breathing.

He smiles... "Exactly." And then he's coming up to me from behind, his very warm fingers curling around my hips, pulling me close. With a sigh, I lean back into him, my body melting into his. We begin to sway to the music and I close my eyes, relaxed.

But of course, it doesn't last for long. I see grandma's casket, her charred body lying inside. Parts of her flesh melted away--- leaving nothing left to melt in the arms of the man she loved.

Gasping, I stumble out of Adrian's arms, falling hard onto my hands and knees. I took my pills, didn't I?

"Shelby, what happened? What's wrong?" Adrian looks nervous, his strong arms pulling me up.

"Nothing," I say, pushing all of my morbid thoughts aside. Please, go away, leave me alone! I want to focus on Adrian. Just me and him. No grandma.

I give him a fake smile. "I just lost my footing."

"Ok."

Starting to breathe again, I rest my head against his pounding heart as we begin to dance once more. Refusing to think about anything else.

Dancing with him could never get old. I could dance with him every day for the rest of my life and it would never be enough. The feeling of his gentle touch. His hands holding me oh so close. His feet guiding me. His eyes locked on mine.

I want it all. Forever and always.

"What are you thinking about beautiful?" He whispers into my ear. "You sure everything is ok?"

And sure, everything is just fine.

"Nothing of importance," I end up saying, my arms wrapping around his neck. "And yeah, all is great."

We continue to sway to the music. Just us, 2 small humans, against the universe.

Soon everyone goes to sit around the portable heater Jason Miller brought along. I hug my knees to my chest trying to keep warm and Adrian wraps his arm around my shoulder bringing me to his side.

"I promised to keep you warm," he says, blowing hot air onto my cold hands.

I smile at him. "Such a gentleman."

"I try."

I rest my head on his shoulder. "You know it's really late right?"

"Yeah."

"When do you think people are going to start heading back?"

He shrugs. "Whenever they feel like it."

"Mhm." I look over at Levi who's chatting with some guys, with no smile in sight. He seems like he's enjoying himself though and looks like he's in no rush to head back to the comfort of his heated house.

"You seem distracted."

My eyes move back to Adrian, who's watching me carefully. "Just getting tired." I yawn on cue.

He pulls me closer to him so I'm practically on his lap. "You can use me as a pillow."

I laugh. "I don't think you'll make such a comfy pillow."

He pouts, jutting out his bottom lip and I have the sudden urge to nip at it. "Ouch, that's insulting. I always thought I was soft and cuddly."

Nuzzling his neck, I say, "You are."

"Then why won't I make a comfy pillow."

"Because."

"Because isn't an answer."

I plant a kiss behind his ear. "Yes, it is."

"No, it's not."

We could go on forever, but we don't.

"Whatever," I say, my eyes beginning to droop.

He says nothing, his head leaning on mine. We sit like this for a while, the stars twinkling above our heads. And I close my eyes, Adrian and my friends disappearing.

"I'm so tired," I murmur.

"Ok, I'll take you home."

"I'm too tired to walk."

"I'll carry you then."

My eyes open to be staring into his and he smiles. I nod and he scoops me up, my head pressed against his chest. "I'm gonna take this sleepy baby back to her house," he announces. "Goodnight all."

He doesn't wait for any answers, walking off into the night with me in his arms. I try not to care what the others think.

I'm too tired for anything.

***

At some point, Adrian becomes too weak from shlepping my dead weight around and I tell him to put me down so I can walk on my own.

He takes my hand in his and hand in hand we make the rest of the way to my home sweet home.

"Goodnight," he says, his 5 fingers releasing their hold on mine.

I get onto my tippytoes and bring my mouth to his. "Goodnight." He smiles and I pull away, my hand on his cheek. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"You betcha."

"Til then."

Turning my back on him, I march across the lawn to the kitchen window which is usually unlocked, and to my surprise find that it is actually locked this time around. Uh oh.

Inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale- inhale- exhale...

"Everything ok?"

I glance back to see Adrian still standing there, his hands stuffed into his coat pockets.

"I'm locked out."

"Try the front door..."

I do--- it's locked too and so is the window to my bedroom. 

"I guess you're staying the night," Adrian smiles.

A blush rises to my cheeks. Adrian and I used to have sleepovers when we were children, but that was years ago when no feelings were budding between us...

I look at him, trying to return a smile, 1 that I'm sure is lopsided. "Yeah, it seems so."

We walk side by side across the lawn to his house. His front door is unlocked and we slip inside, tiptoeing up the wooden staircase to his bedroom.

"Make yourself at home," he gestures around the somewhat messy room. "I'm going to go take a quick shower."

"Ok."

He enters the bathroom and I go to sit down on his bed, sinking into the thick mattress. There are a few clothes spread out on the bed beside me and I move them to the armchair. I then remove my coat and place it on the chair too. My shoes join the mess on the blue carpeted floor.

Laying back, I stare up at the ceiling, counting the little, yellow star stickers. 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12-13-14-15-16... I lose count as Adrian walks out of the bathroom wearing nothing, but a towel. My eyes skim over his broad chest and rock-hard abs, trying to hold back the drool. He's definitely a specimen of perfection. Tall and fit from working out in army camp. And he's all mine.

Adrian notices me staring and I blush. "I'm going to put some clothes on," he says. I say nothing as he walks up to his dresser and pulls out his PJ shorts. He looks back at me. "Do you want a long t-shirt or something to change into?"I nod and he tosses an orange t-shirt at me. "You can use the bathroom to change."

"Thank you." My voice comes out as a squeak.

He smiles, his 2 beautiful evergreen eyes watching me climb off his bed and make my way to the bathroom. "I left a toothbrush and toothpaste by the sink."

"Ok, thanks again." I enter the bathroom, locking the door behind me. I then lean against the closed door and take in a deep breath, trying to calm down my racing heart.

I don't know if I can do this. I'm falling in too deep with him and I'm scared I'm going to chase him away by showing him my crazy side. The 1 I try to hide from him.

I pinch the bridge of my nose and then exhaling, I push myself away from the door and quickly change into the t-shirt that falls down to my knobbly knees.

The sink water is frigid as I brush my teeth, causing me to shiver. Adrian must turn the heat on higher. I'm too cold.

When I step out of the bathroom, Adrian is already dressed in his checkered PJ shorts and is sitting in his bed, reading something off of his phone--- his lips moving as he reads. I can't help myself from smiling. He's so cute.

He looks up when I enter, his eyes trailing over my body and I feel myself blushing again. "You look good in my clothes."

The blush spreads down my neck like the plague. "Thanks."

He pats the spot beside him. "Join me."

I do, my knee brushing against his.

He's now looking at me with dreamy eyes and I feel myself drowning in them. "You are so beautiful," he whispers.

I say nothing as he positions himself in front of me, making us face to face, as opposed to side by side. His 2 hands take grip of my 2 knees, pulling me toward him, leaving no inches between us. I close my eyes as his lips find mine, brazing. My hands circle around his bare waist bringing him down with me when I lay back. His long body engulfing mine. I can feel his thighs pressing into my knees and I hope my pointy knees aren't poking him too much. As if he knew I was thinking about my pointy knees, his hands, hot like a blazing fire run up my legs, resting on my knees before moving on to squeezing my thighs. I'm going to burst.

"Adrian," I whisper.

He smiles, deepening our kiss, making my back arch as he takes hold of my hips, my 10 fingers digging into his strong arms. I can feel his labored breaths and I know that I have the same effect on him as he has on me.

"Adrian." Now I'm gasping for air.

He pulls away slightly, his nose brushing against mine, so, so, so soft. "Yes."

I get ready to blurt out the 3 words that are bubbling inside me... But he goes and kisses me again, taking away all my breath.

"Don't say it." He murmurs against my lips.

His eyes are locked on mine and I see that he's afraid. He's afraid of admitting. He's afraid of me loving him. Afraid of truly loving me. Oh my God.

I pull away as fast as I can, causing him to fall off the bed with a loud thud.

"Ouch," he moans.

I don't care if he's badly hurt. I don't care, I don't care, I don't care. He's been playing me all this time.

"Shelby." He's struggling to stand up.

"No, no, no." I shake my head. Go away, go away, go away.

He looks at me broken. "Let me explain, please."

"You didn't want me to say it. Why?" Tears are streaming down my face like a river. Overflowing.

The bed dips as he sits down beside me, his thumb wiping away my tears. All I can do is look at him, pained. At last, he speaks, "I didn't want you to say it because I'm falling in too deep with you..."

"And why is that bad?"

"Because..." His voice falters and he takes in a deep breath. "I'm scared I'm going to lose you, Shelby."

I take his 2 hands in mine and place them over my thumping heart. "You have nothing to be scared of Adrian, I'm all yours."

He begins to cry, making me so confused. "I-I have to tell you something."

"No," I say. "I don't want to hear any of it. Not now."

My thumb is now wiping away his tears. It's late, we're overtired, and our emotions are haywire. We're most probably not thinking straight. We are not thinking straight.

"Ok," he says. "It can wait to be told."

"Good." I snuggle up beside him, my head at the crook of his arm. "Goodnight Adrian."

He curls up around me. "Goodnight."

I fall asleep with 1 thought knocking against my skull, will we be ok?