Chapter 19: Goodbye

The days that followed felt like borrowed time.

Noelle and I started seeing each other more—maybe because we both knew we were on a countdown, even if neither of us said it aloud.

We studied together after class, usually at this quiet café two blocks away from school. She'd always order iced mocha, while I stuck to plain black coffee—no sugar, no cream. She said my drink matched my personality. I pretended to be offended, but she knew I liked the tease.

There were times we didn't even talk. We'd just sit across from each other, books open, pens in hand, stealing glances between chapters. Minsan nagtatawanan kami kapag pareho kaming hindi makaintindi ng lesson. Other times, we sat in silence—but it was never awkward. It was the kind of silence that felt safe.

One afternoon, after a long study session, we walked over to the museum.

Noelle said she likes the museum because she also enjoys looking at artworks.

Hindi ko halos namamalayan, pero unti-unti na pala akong natututo ng maraming bagay tungkol kay Noelle.

I realized that she's simple, but she thinks deeply. She's also smart, sweet, at maalalahanin din siyang tao.

And I was starting to like everything about her.

"Parang hindi mo 'to type," she teased as we stared up at the stone steps leading to the entrance.

"It's not," I admitted, "but I think I'll like it today."

She smiled, knowingly.

We wandered through the exhibits—paintings, sculptures, photographs frozen in time. We lingered at an old black-and-white photo of a couple dancing in the rain.

"What do you think happened to them?" she asked.

I looked at the image. The man was laughing. The woman's eyes were closed, her head against his chest.

"I think they were happy... for as long as they could be," I said.

She nodded. "Sometimes, that's enough."

I didn't say anything back. Because deep down, I knew what she meant.

The more time we spent together, the heavier things felt. But at the same time, everything was lighter too—like we were trying to fit a whole lifetime in a few weeks.

We took silly photos at a sticker booth one day after school. We started exchanging small gifts—she gave me a soccer ball, and I gave her one of my jerseys. Walang halatang drama. Lahat parang simpleng mga bagay lang. Pero sa totoo lang, bawat isang alaala ay tinatago ko sa puso ko.

At sumakto pang nagkaroon din kami ng Sports Day sa school.

I was able to spend more time not just with Noelle, but also with my high school soccer teammates—mga kaklase at kasama ko sa team noon. We laughed a lot, played hard, and for the first time, I really felt like I was living in the moment. No pressure. No rush. Just being a regular student again.

Nandoon din si Chloe, kaklase at kaibigan ni Noelle, who kept teasing us the entire day.

"Uy, kayo na ba talaga ni Noelle?" she said with a smug grin habang inaayos ang hair tie niya before the relay.

I just shook my head, half-laughing. "Wala naman kaming sinasabi."

"Eh halata naman! Kita mo 'to, oh—" she pointed at Noelle across the field, who was talking to some of her classmates. "Bakit parang ikaw lang 'yung laging kasama niyan ngayon?"

I couldn't argue. She wasn't wrong.

As for the rest of our classmates and schoolmates, they eventually stopped gossiping about me and Noelle. At first, there were the usual stares, the raised eyebrows, the not-so-subtle whispers behind our backs. But after a while, people just... got used to it. To us. Sa tuwing makikita nila kaming magkasama, wala na lang. Normal na lang.

And I think I changed too.

Dati, I wouldn't have cared what anyone thought. I wouldn't even care if someone needed help during a game or if a teammate messed up a play—I would've been too focused on winning, on being the best.

Pero ngayon, I found myself cheering not just for myself or my team, but for everyone.

Nang nadapa 'yung isa naming kaklase sa obstacle course, I was the first to help him up.

Nang napansin kong kinakabahan 'yung isa naming first-time player before the match, I gave him advice, patted him on the back, told him he could do it.

"Grabe, Julian, who are you and what did you do to the old you?" one of my classmates joked after the soccer game, half-serious.

I smiled, looked over at Noelle who was watching from the bleachers, clapping with Chloe and a few others. "Maybe I just learned to care more."

And that was true.

Somewhere between studying beside her, walking through quiet museum halls, and laughing over coffee, I started seeing the world differently. I started seeing people—not just as extras in the background of my goals, but as lives and stories worth noticing.

Later that day, habang naghihintay kami sa labas ng school gym after the event, Noelle handed me a small bottle of water.

"Great game," she said, eyes crinkling from her smile.

"Thanks. You stayed the whole time?"

"Of course. I'm your number one fan, remember?"

I looked at her, sweaty and a little tired, but somehow feeling completely at peace. "That means a lot."

And in that moment, beneath the setting sun and the buzz of students heading home, I realized something about I wasn't just going to miss her.

I was going to miss everything about this life I was starting to build—with her, with my friends, with the people I was slowly learning to appreciate again.

Pero alam kong may hangganan din ang lahat.

And that goodbye was coming sooner than I wanted.

And then came that afternoon—just before I knew I'd have to go back.

We were sitting on the side of the soccer field. The sun was starting to set, casting a golden glow over everything.

"I think... you should go back soon," she said, eyes lowered to her drink.

Parang may humigpit sa dibdib ko. I knew this moment would come, but hearing it still felt like getting the wind knocked out of me.

I didn't answer right away.

She finally looked up and met my eyes, smiling—that calm, beautiful smile again.

"You have to, Julian."

"But—" I stopped. I couldn't argue. Not with that smile. Not with the way she said my name.

"It's okay," she whispered. "Really."

She reached across and gently held my hand.

"I want you to live your life. Fulfill everything you were meant to. Don't hold back just for me."

I wanted to protest. I wanted to say I'd stay.

But I didn't.

Because her eyes were saying something else—something deeper.

She was letting me go.

And maybe... maybe that was her way of loving me, too.

I only thought of all this at first as just feelings... after all, doon naman nagsisimula ang lahat. Until slowly, I began to call it love. Although it's still a strange thing to me—as I'm sure it is for Noelle too. Bata pa kami, at marahil wala pa kaming masyadong alam tungkol sa pag-ibig. But if this isn't love, then what is? This intense feeling. The ache in my chest. And the way we never want to be apart...

I remember my ancestor, based on the story my lola once told me. He tried to manipulate and defy time—just for one more chance with the woman he loved.

Even with the little time we had, I learned what all these feelings for Noelle meant.

But I squeezed her hand back and looked at her seriously.

"Okay... but only if you promise me something, too."

She tilted her head slightly, curious.

"Promise me you'll always put yourself first. Your safety. Your life. No chasing after anyone. No taking risks for me or for anyone else. Please."

Her smile faltered just a little, but she nodded.

"Promise me, Noelle."

"I promise," she whispered. "I'll take care of myself."

And for a moment, it felt like we were both holding on—and saying goodbye—all at once.