{15-I'm Not Sorry But I'm Pretending I Am}

Hermione realized that it wasn't just her. Everyone seemed to be in the same mood, and since they were all spending time together, nothing was going too well. The irritation seemed to be passing back and forth, and even James and Lily were struggling to stay civil. The fact of the matter was, everyone was stressed. 

N.E.W.T.'s were very important tests, and they all knew that. Sirius seemed much less concerned than the rest of them, but those who did want to pass and do well in their future careers were studying hard. 

Now, in truth, it shouldn't have mattered to Hermione in the slightest. She didn't need to pass or have a job. In all honesty what she should have been doing is preparing to leave everyone which meant a whole slew of things she didn't care to think about. 

DeLancey was working his hardest to try and help her get back home, and although he hadn't run into anything particularly helpful yet, there was certainly merit in what he was trying to do for her. His help was more than she ever could have asked for. This was an adult wizard who had plenty of experience behind him, which was more than she would have had by herself. 

The table of six students was very quiet as they poured over textbooks and tried not to make eye-contact with one-another. Well, most of them, Hermione felt rather foolish studying so she was staring at Remus, attempting to commit him to memory in this happy state he was in. She was trying to remember the innocence of James and Lily too, how they looked at one-another as though there was no one else on the planet who could fit them so perfectly. And Sirius, his pride and unfaltering cockiness, how little that would change, but the years wouldn't be kind to him. 

She sighed, audibly, catching the attention of Remus who probably knew that sound very well. They'd been getting close over the past few months, everything going very well for them. He looked at her with a wicked grin she was sometimes very surprised he could manage, then stood up, looking aggravated.

"I'm going for a walk, if I look at one more tome I will claw my eyes out," he said, the boys giggling, Lily seeming unimpressed. 

Hermione got the joke, but she couldn't tell him that. As well as they were doing, he would never trust her as much as he trusted his friends who already knew. Those around him were so good to him. James had come back with a scratch one night, but didn't complain about it a wit. Not even a comment went towards it, and she commended them all for their kindness. 

They had even been kind to Severus over the past few weeks, she thought briefly. He and Hermione were still good friends, as she decided she'd just obliviate him as well. Regardless of that, he sat with her and the Gryffindors for every Quidditch game, even the Slytherin matches. He simply just shrunk a little more into his robes then, rooting for his house. It became routine, and he ignored them as much as he was ignored. So the marauders weren't exactly nice to Severus, merely paid him no mind, but that was better than nothing. 

Hermione knew Remus wanted to her to follow him, so she stood up and said politely, "I'm going to the loo, be back soon." 

Sirius snorted, but the other three only waved and stuck their noses back into their books. 

She found him almost immediately, sequestered away in one of the many crevices this bloody school had. 

"I'm going mad, I don't want to pass anymore," he said as he pulled her to him, a warm forehead against her own. 

"Oh, shut it, you want an O just as much as I do. You'll do brilliantly."

He scoffed, pulling back to rest his head against the cold stone. "Would you do me a favor?" 

"Surely?" 

"Just be yourself for a moment. I know it's the middle of the day, but it's already been such a long one and we haven't gone to the Room of Requirement in weeks..." Remus pleaded, and what a funny thing too. 

He always wanted her to be herself around him, maybe feeding off her bravery since he couldn't seem to do it himself. She wished he would tell her that he was werewolf, she'd hate to have to confront him about it. It's not like he'd remember telling her! Of course, he didn't know that. 

"Sure," she admonished, taking out her wand and simultaneously pulling down her charms and transfiguring her clothes. "I figured you'd want the whole thing."

He smiled, hugging her to him so simply. They pulled back and Hermione smiled at him, feeling so like herself that it scared her. She never got to be like this with Severus, and she considered him one of her best friends. Remus was a wonderful boyfriend, bar the secret-keeping, but it was just weird to her. 

They kissed gently, and it was moments like this where Hermione wished she could stay forever, but wanted to go home and stop hurting everyone with a fierce passion. 

How terribly paradoxical of her. 

Moments like that couldn't last forever, though, they never did. In fact, their moment got ruined by a sharp, dramatic gasp which she really wished she hadn't heard. 

Remus looked first, his face pale and terrified. He shoved Hermione behind him and cleared his throat. 

"Hey, Sirius."

"Hey Sirius? Is that all you've got to say for yourself, Rem?" 

Hermione cringed, this was not going to go well for anyone. Of course, there mightn't be any harm in Sirius knowing if no one was going to know Florizel existed in the first place, but the matter of fact was that she didn't want to tell him. 

"I know you might be angry at me, but I need you to just go back to the library."

Sirius huffed, "As if! I thought you and Florizel went to snog, which is fine, by all means, but apparently he took a real trip to the loo, and you, took a trip down Cheater's Lane!" 

Hermione didn't think anyone she knew was as dramatic as this man was, shaking her head as she stood behind Remus with a terrible grin. Part of this was absolutely hilarious, and the other part was simply annoying. 

Sirius came around and addressed her, Remus holding his arm in front of her and looking as annoyed as the one half of her felt. 

"Get out of here," he said, looking displeased. 

"Yeah," she replied succinctly, running to another sequestered corner, changing everything back to the way it was supposed to be and heading back to the table where she was to sit and wait for Sirius and Remus to come back, certainly in a flurry of drama she didn't care to deal with. 

When they did come back, Remus looked very tired, his teeth clenched on a lip so he wouldn't laugh as Sirius carted him in by the vice grip he had on Remus' sleeve. 

"Sit," and he pulled him down, the whole thing coming out to be quite funny now. 

"What's going on here?" Asked a completely new voice, and Hermione found her sense of dread suddenly come back. Not that it had been there recently, but this was not a situation she wanted Severus Snape witnessing. 

"Exposure," Sirius regarded him, surprising the whole table that he addressed the Slytherin at all, "Remus here got caught snogging a girl in the halls."

Hermione made a last minute decision when she heard this news, their heated whispers the funniest thing that had happened all week. 

"So that's why there was perfume on your collar the other night?" She asked, faking anger and betrayal. Remus threw her the deadliest of looks and began to beg with his eyes to help him. 

"I can explain," Remus offered halfheartedly.

"No," Sirius said tartly, "Florizel, I think this is up to you, he's my best friend, but I'll hex him all the same."

"Honestly," Hermione said looking up at Severus, who seemed rather perturbed at Remus currently, "It's finals time, we're all stressed. It was probably a few moments of weakness is all."

The pined down wolf looked quite relieved, but Severus did not seem pleased with this, nor did Sirius. Peter seemed like he could care less, and the other couple at the table were attempting to both mind their own business and listen in all at the same time. 

"What?" Two voices echoed at her, both dramatic arseholes who needed to stay out of other's business. 

"Let it go, I'm sure Remus is sorry, right?" Hermione questioned. 

"Of course, terribly sorry," Remus said, snatching his sleeve from his stunned friend. You could have hit him with an actual stunner and no one would be able to tell the difference. 

"Good, then it's settled," she said, looking up at Severus with a smile. He was not pleased she was letting Remus off that easily, it was very obvious. 

Even more obvious when he asked her quickly, "Can I talk to you for a moment, in private?" 

"Surely," Hermione said with a quick bookmark tagged into her reading, giving Remus a sorry smile as she saw him getting talked at by Sirius. 

They went to the same cove she'd just been caught snogging Sirius in and felt the coincidence sink into her shoulders. 

"You can't just let him off like that, he cheated on you," Severus Snape said, his drawl making a comeback if only to stress the fact that Remus had done something bad. 

The fact was that he hadn't, so no harm no foul. Her only problem was that everyone saw the harm and decided it was appropriate to lay blame. 

"It's been a horrid couple of days, Severus. We're all stressed, I get it."

He shook his head, dark hair flowing with the motion, and then he put a hand on Hermione's shoulder and spoke right to her soul, "How can you take this so easily? You don't deserve that kind of treatment, Zel!" 

Hardly focused on what he was saying, Hermione felt the warmth of his hand on her shoulder and frowned, wishing she still didn't harbor whatever schoolgirl crush she should have stopped months ago. She really did like Remus, but none of this was permanent. 

"What do you care, Sev?" 

Now he was frustrated, taking back his warmth and breathing heavily. 

"I care because I-" he stopped, looking at her quizzically, as though not knowing what to say next, "Because I'm your friend." 

"Well, it's not your relationship, so don't bother."

"If it was my relationship, I'd end it. There's no reason to keep someone around who doesn't want you," he told her with condescension. 

Rolling her eyes, Hermione said her next words slowly, "He does care, Severus. You don't know anything."

"Fine," he replied, "Forget me trying to help my friend. You deserve better."

"And what is better, Severus, hm?" 

He didn't seem keen on replying, and Hermione didn't exactly know why he was suddenly caught up in this. Usually he kept as much distance away from her relationship as possible. This sudden interference was annoying and useless. 

"I'm going back to my boyfriend and my studying, see you later." 

"Sure."

Feeling defeated, Hermione went back to the library and packed her stuff up, going over to Remus and placing a kiss on his cheek as she did so. Sirius seemed perplexed, and everyone else merely went along with it. James did look mildly disappointed in Remus, but she supposed her forgiveness eased Potter just a bit. Lily, who she knew didn't care for her, stayed kept with her nose in her book. 

Maybe one day all of this would be just a distant memory... and maybe one-day she'd be able to tell her grand kids about this silly adventure through time where she met all of her friends parents. That was if the curse didn't drive her absolutely wild by the time she was able to start her life again. Merlin save her. 

A/N

Kind of an aggressive chapter, I know, but I like it. I hope you do too. Stuff goes uphill from here... or down depending on how you look at it! Anyways, sorry it's late, see you next time!