Chapter 24

Lily was shocked as Ian turned into the driveway and stopped next to Jessica's motorcycle. The front of the house and around the side had flower beds filled with lilies. Many were white traditional Easter lilies, but there were also golden Asiatic lilies, Japanese freckled lilies, pink Stargazer lilies, daylilies of every color, and some that were dark scarlet.

"it's so beautiful," she exclaimed as Ian turned off the motor.

"Andrew and Jess spent all last weekend planting the lilies around the house and decorating the inside," he explained grinning.

"I love it," Lily responded as she opened the door. The sweet fragrance of lilies flooded into the car with the warm humidity of Florida's spring, and she sneezed.

"Bless you," Ian said as he got out and opened the back door to take out Ava's car seat.

The front door opened, and Jess rushed out to hug-maul her sister. Hillary stood on the porch smiling and waved.

"don't you just love it?" Jessica giggled. "I dragged Andrew to every home and garden center in the greater Tampa Bay area, to get as many kinds of lilies in bloom as I could find."

"you didn't have to do that," Lily insisted, "but I'm glad you did. the yard looks amazing."

"Andrew put in one of those drip systems with the tubes so that you don't have to worry about watering them every day. We also put mulch around all of the bulbs to protect them from the heat," Jess announced as she guided Lily around the house to the backyard. "There are cages around the bulbs so the voles and squirrels don't get them."

Stepping up on the porch, Ian hugged his mother. "Andrew said they had been busy but I didn't realize they put so much work into making the house a home for Lily."

"They made it a home for you too. Let's get Ava inside, then you can go look at the backyard."

Hillary opened the door and Ian was shocked to see most of the furniture from the old house was already in place in the new house. Candid pictures of the family from Christmas hung in small frames in the entry hall. The darker tones of Ian's furniture were lightened up with soft pastel throws, quilted pillows, and breezy curtains. The change from minimalist to cottage chic was dramatic even though the main furniture pieces remained unchanged.

"How did you do this?" Ian asked in surprise.

"I went back to the Tiger Lily Inn with Evie and she sent several of the things that Lily loved home with me. We wanted her to feel comfortable and happy. Hello, my angel." Hillary hummed happily as she took Ava out of the car seat. "Go check out the backyard. I don't think you'll get a weekend alone with that patio grill Andrew had installed."

Ian went out the French doors into the backyard and was surprised to see large flowering trees surrounded by tulips, lilies, and anemones. There was a swing in the shade of one of the trees opposite a large stone wall. Walking around it, he was surprised to see a built-in grill and wood-fueled pizza oven. On the table under the umbrella, set a pitcher of iced tea and several glasses. Lily was on her knees next to one of the flower beds, it looked like she was petting the mulch which had green shoots sticking up through it..

"And Auntie is certain they will grow?" she asked Jess tentatively.

"Yes, Aunt Evie said they should grow just fine."

"What should grow?" Ian asked.

"Aunt Evie sent down dozens of tiger lily bulbs from the yard of the Tiger Lily Inn so that Lily would have flowers from home," Jess revealed with enthusiasm. "She also sent high resolution pictures of the mural in ava's baby room which we printed and framed to go with the quilts and crib."

Tears leaked from Lily's eyes. "I... I don't deserve this... I put you all through so much."

Mirroring her half-sister, Jess knelt next to her and hugged her. "You are worth so much more than this... I'm so sorry I didn't realize how close you were to the edge again... I'm never there the moment you need me."

As they clung to each other weeping, Ian just stood helplessly. He hadn't realized when he broke himself and Lily, that he had broken her sister too. He blinked and turned away, their pain was a direct result of his choice to believe a liar because of his baggage rather than ask his wife for the truth. He walked inside quickly. Getting a glass of ice water, he gulped it, wishing it was vodka. He knew he couldn't take a drink, no matter how much his guilt needled him to do it.

"Ian?" Hillary startled him. "What's wrong?"

"How do I earn Lily's forgiveness? How do I make up for what I put her and her siblings through? I'm a terrible person." He hated himself. "No wonder she won't remarry me."

Hillary shook her head, refuting him, "You are not a terrible person. You are a man who was betrayed and because of it, you have trust issues. You are getting couples therapy, it will..."

"Mom, I want a drink. I want a drink so bad I can feel the burn just thinking about it," Ian confessed.

"Do... Do you need to go to a meeting?" Hillary asked in worry.

"I know where there is one. It's kinda far but I can take you."

They turned to see Jess standing in the door.

"I wasn't eavesdropping, I came in to get the sugar for the tea," Jess responded to their looks. "My neighbor Paolo lost his license. Mandatory AA was part of his probation. It's at the Catholic Church two blocks from my apartment but Father André can probably give you the information on a closer meeting."

Ian almost refused, but Hillary squeezed his arm. His mother's worry was enough to overcome the shred of pride he had left as he nodded. He looked at Lily with guilt. "I'm sorry I'm so weak."

Looking at him, she realized that she had not realized how broken he was by all of this. He apologized every day, sometimes several times a day, but until that moment, she had not realized he was as broken by their separation as she was. She had heard all his words, listened to his confession, but she hadn't really looked at him until then. Lily hugged him, and whispered, "You're not weak. If you know you need to get help, that means you're strong. If you need to go, then go... I'll be okay until you get home."

Glancing between them, Hillary volunteered, "Lily, I'll give you a tour of the house and we can walk to the park."

Jess nodded, "Hillary can you text Andrew to come for dinner? Ian and I will stop and get some steak and shrimp on the way back. There's salad and potatoes in the fridge."

"You went grocery shopping for me?" Lily asked in surprise.

"Yah, I even got that humus you like so much, don't ya know?" Jess suddenly sounded like a southern Wisconsin native then grinned.

"Let's get the luggage out and go... Thanks, Jessica," Ian said before he went out.

As they drove over the bridge back into Tampa, Ian glanced at his wife's half-sister. The resemblance was still surprising but not enough that he should have mistaken them for each other. Lily looked even less like Jessica now. Cosmetic surgery to repair the damage done by the bitter cold of Wisconsin in winter had permanently changed Lily's face. He was glad Jessica was driving so he could close his eyes.

"You know my mother was an alcoholic. My grandmother too, but she quit drinking when I asked her to. Not my mom though, she cracked when she learned the truth about my dad and killed two people drunk driving. She's up for parole in a couple of years or maybe this year, but I don't know or even care. The only letters I got from her were hate-filled tirades blaming me for what happened. Grandma Ann tried to hide them from me. I was mad when I found them but after reading them, I realized it was easier to just think she had forgotten about me. I started going to Al-Anon meetings and Grandma Ann went with me."

"What do you think will happen to her when she gets out?" Ian asked, thinking about what would have happened to him without his mother and brother's love and support.

"She'll have to serve out her probation in Utah but, honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if she died drunk driving," Jess revealed. "Andrew told me you almost died after that crap with Carly."

Snorting, Ian shook his head, as he admitted, "I should have. It was a miracle I didn't die, and that I didn't take anyone with me. Mom made them take my license and sentence me to two years of community service. I had just finished when I met Lily. She made me so happy I stopped going to meetings. I stopped holding myself accountable."

As Jessica parked, he noticed she waved at a tall, tanned man walking inside. She turned and looked at him, "You and Lily are more alike than you realize. Only you can overcome your addictions... I know everyone here and I've talked about my mom and Lily before. Your brother came to a meeting with me once to see what they were like, but he didn't say anything. Do you want me to come in with you?"

Ian looked across the parking lot at the church before glancing back to the plain cinderblock building. "Yes, please."

Nodding, Jessica opened the door and waited for him. She introduced him to Father André and Germain who worked to match people to sponsors. They knew of a closer meeting to Ian's new address, but when Ian spoke, another man volunteered to be his sponsor. After the meeting, people ate sandwiches and chatted. Ian found himself strengthened and encouraged as he spoke with other men who had lost their families and felt encouraged that he was getting a second chance. He felt more determined than before to not lose his wife and child. Jess seemed to disappear for a while then as the meeting broke up, she found him again.

"I went to a carnicerías and got the steaks. They had shrimp today so I got a few pounds of that too."

Walking out, he was shocked at how far the sun had sunk. "What time is it?" He had left his phone in the car as was protocol for such meetings.

"Almost six... Come on." She led him back to his SUV. "Do you want to drive?"

Ian took the keys. "Thanks for this today." He got in as she did.

Jess put her seatbelt on. "Don't thank me. Keeping you sane and stable helps Lily. I know everyone in the family says Kitty and Laura are the biyatches but don't believe it. I am the biggest one of them all. I've been to jail, I'm not afraid to go back and Lily recovering and giving Ava a happy childhood is the thing I care about most. Hurt her again, and you will meet not-nice Jessica. You don't want to meet not-nice Jessica."

"What about a life with Andrew? Don't you want to get married and have what Lily and I have?" Ian asked.

Laughing, Jess shook her head. "I don't ever want what you and Lily have. I want happiness, stability, total honesty from the start, and as little drama as possible."

"He loves you."

"And I love him, but I won't... Fuk!"

She gasped as she slammed into the seatbelt when he stomped on his brakes to keep from rear-ending a blue sports car that cut them off. Panting, she watched it speed through a yellow light.

"Damned tourists!" She snarled.

Ian just shook his head. "I just remembered the only part of Florida I hate. The tourists."

Jess stared at him in shock for a minute then burst out laughing.

<<@>>

Kitty carried a cup of hot coffee out to the guard shed at the Alaska Grocery Depot. "Here ya go, Max. Who's here to see me?"

"USPS needs a signature." He touched her hand for a moment as he took the cup. His smile made her bow her head slightly then she smiled back at him. His eyes telling her what his words couldn't because they were at work.

Turning away before she blushed, Kitty walked over to the USPS truck as she pulled her wallet from her pocket. "I'm Jakita Johansen."

"Your landlady said you would be here. I have a piece of registered mail for you from Utah State Department of Corrections," the mail carrier announced as she looked at Kitty's ID. She scanned the barcode and had Kitty sign on her scanner. "You're a hard lady to track down."

Looking at the label, Kitty saw that it had been forwarded twice. Once from Jessica's Florida address where she kept an active forward for anything and once from her Washington apartment. "My half-sister lives in Florida for college, and I just moved up here from stateside."

"Well, welcome to Alaska," the mail carrier announced and left.

Kitty wondered what the letter was as she tore it open and pulled a second envelope as she walked back toward the guard hut. She stopped and stared at the piece of paper.

"Kitty?" Max walked toward her quickly as a truck left the yard past them.

Looking up at him, she blinked. "My mom is dead. This is her death certificate."

Max quickly pulled her inside the gate shed, and sat her on a stool as he read the letter with the paperwork. "To the Family of Belinda Johansen. You are hereby informed of the death of your relative in the custody of the State Women's Correctional facility... blah, blah, blah... Inmate Johansen died of a cardiac arrest while working in the laundry facility. Her remains were cremated. Please contact the address below to receive them and Inmate Johansen's personal effects. Wardens Office." He exhaled, "Oh crap. Are you okay, Kitty?"

"Yeah, I'm... I'm okay. I haven't seen her in twenty years. I was eight when my testimony put her in jail for murdering the boyfriend she let molest me and Lily, then they found out she killed our father with another guy that was also found dead under unusual circumstances two years earlier." She glanced at the list of personal items. None of it meant anything to her. There was also a check for $328.50 cents. "I need to call my family before I leave at noon."

"What's your load?"

"Tandem trio of empties, solo." She frowned then touched his arm. "Want to have lunch before I head south?"

"Perfect. I get off at noon. I worked ten days straight and start my vacation. Do you want... I mean, may I come with you?"

"It wouldn't be practical. I'm just going straight down and coming straight back, but if Mr. Leomans found a team driver for me to train, you'll have to fly back," she warned. "It's pretty expensive."

"I'm not worried about it. It would be worth it to spend two days with you," Max grinned down at her. He wanted to hug her but that would get both of them fired. "Meet me at the Rib Rack Steak Shack?"

"Alright." Kitty agreed and walked away texting her Aunt Evie and sisters. Belinda passed away from a heart attack in prison three weeks ago. Do you want me to send for her ashes?