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Chapter 4

"Eff off rain..." I whispered to myself as I walked in the park. Why the hell was it always me?

The cold rain hit my arms and legs, and everywhere as I stopped. The tears poring out of my eyes just built up into a well, and fell out of my eyes.

As I stopped, I looked into the sky. I had such an urge to scream to God for lightning to strike me then and there.

I didn't give a damn.

I did give a damn about making the little ones happy though, so I kept on walking.

I then remembered the spot. The spot where my father once took me. I remember, when I was very little, him saying that he knew of another swing set beyond the park.

He had taken me there multiple times after that. Then he got a new job, and never had any time to spend with me anymore. Not to mention he didn't like me, or Dante, that much either.

I let the tears dribble down my face as I kept on walking, to find the spot. I soon got there and took a good look at the swings, wondering why they were abandoned. It was like abandoning a person randomly, with no chance of escaping.

I sat down on the swing set, knowing no one would be able to find me. The only person who knew was Kyle. Him.

He was honestly the last person I wanted to see at the moment. He seemed to hate me. I thought he would be the one to understand, to actually forgive me.

But no.

Natalie Campbell.

The professional idiot in our school.

She used to be this nice, sweet, girl, who everyone loved and she was actually nice.

And then it changed.

Her father left. Her mother had a small drinking problem. Nat had turned to drugs. She was left scared by them all. She had stopped because her mother stopped.

She was left mentally ill is what I'm trying to say. Everyone denies it, and everyone's to afraid of what would happen if they told her she was a drug addict. She had a boyfriend, his name was Charlie. He was the cute kid in our class in freshmen year.

She got him hooked on drugs and he had an overdose. I visit the grave every other week.

Now, I'm just sitting there.

Waiting for something.

Then, my phone vibrates, and I yank it out.

danisnotonfire uploaded - for the suicidals

(I needed a video to work with people! I NEEDED TO MAKE ONE UP.)

I always kept and earplugs in my hoodie, and today was a reason why I always do. I pulled them out and plunged them into the hole.

I scrolled over to his channel when I got onto YouTube.

I see the video and click on it immediately, not only was this one of my favorite YouTubers, but also somebody I could relate too. I grinned as I see another notification on my phone appear from Markiplier.

"Dear Suicidal People, I really couldn't talk to the camera about this so I decided to type this. No matter what, you are beautiful. I know some of you sometimes hurt yourselves because of bullying and people judging you. Just know, i think you're beautiful in every way possible." Was typed onto the screen as I watched.

I started asking myself, "Am I suicidal?" I looked around my surroundings. I was sitting on a swing set that had been rusted over for over ten years. I didn't care though. I really did love those swings.

I knew I wasn't suicidal. How can you become suicidal in one day? But what else would I able able to think at a time like this. I'm a drama queen.

"Andre?" I heard a male voice say. I looked around and saw J.J looking around the bush. I quietly shut my phone off and went and hid behind another one of the bushes that didn't lead to outside. 

I pushed myself through the bush, wondering why I hadn't just ran out in the other direction. My phone suddenly started ringing loudly, so I had to turn it on just to lower the volume of the ringer. I looked through the bush and saw eyes staring back at me.

I stood up and looked at my feet. I looked up to see him looking kind of sad and mad.  I bit my lip and tried to focus on the fact I had to watch a new Mark episode, but it honestly wasn't working out.

"Andre. Don't run off like that." He said while sighing and walking away.

I collapsed to the ground in a fit of tears after he left.

God why, of all the things to ruin, why did it have to be my high school reputation?

I keep repeating that question in my head over and over again. Hey, I know the guy won't answer, but it's a worth a shot.

I looked up at the sky to see it was turning night very quickly and quickly ran down the pathway to the exit. I looked to see the only people still here.

Emma and Kyle.

They were there talking to each other, Emma kind of yelling. Some slapping was going on, and I was chuckling at one point when she threatened to jump on him.

I was just stood there, wondering why she was doing that for me. I never really deserved her as a best friend.

I was in my own world for a while, until I heard a little giggle.

And the giggle was coming from a certain professional idiot.

I turned around to be met with Natalie, Kayla, and Gianna glaring at me.

I felt the anger boiling inside me. That little jerk had caused me hell in one day. I wanted to charge at her and knock her to her feet, but of course I didn't since I was a nice person.

Well, somewhat of a nice person. I don't like boys, remember?

I just stared at her until I felt the tension was so thick I could cut it with a knife. That's the second time today.

"Andre, give up. He's not coming back to you! He's staying with us." Gianna whispered in a annoying whisper voice. The anger was coming quicker.

I huffed at her and decided to yell at her something only I knew.

"Well maybe, you wouldn't have to worry about people leaving you if you would just tell your friends that you like girls, too!"

The comment sent Nexa and Kayla berserk.

"You kissed a girl?"

"Faggot!"

"Are you bi?"

"WHY DIDN'T YOU EFFING TELL US!?!?"

Screams were being tossed around, as the insults were doing the same.

I couldn't bare listening to the comments about her, so I held my hands over my ears and fell to my knees, looking like I was begging God not to do this to her.

I removed my hands from my ears and put them to my eyes to dry my tears. I felt very light headed, and everything was starting to go blurry.

When was the last time I drank something?

My hearing was slowly moving away from my grasp, and before I knew it, everything was all blurry and I couldn't see.

Before the world went black, I felt someone pick me up.

Somewhere safe.

Somewhere away from the insults.

Somewhere away from here.

I hoped.

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